nice

jnrbayano:


You see why I type very little and straight to the point?

I never justify lack of self-control. The Op too. I only said that a lady who is voluptuous is already sexually attracting.

I also suggested that a wife should not relegate her duties such as cooking for her husband, serving the food to her husband dressing the bed etc to her housemaid the time I said "employing another helper (woman)"

I pointed out what a wise wife does. She prays for her husband and mitigate temptation from the family.

Her foolish counterparts rather bring hell (temptation etc) to their homes.

Good morning.

Why stress yourself reiterating?

Im not sorry to say this but only very few Nigeria ladies have sound IQ and when you read contrary opinions of this few,you will doff your hat for them

Every one castigating this factual write up have towed same line and i realized that no single one of them comprehended but were just focussed on making unwarranted sarcastic remarks but thats the fun though.

WafiJoe:


I won't argue Fiona. I am a guy, and I can tell you that lots of ladies have a way of silently (almost subconsciously) seducing a guy. It is a natural feminine thing, that is are they are made. And I must say, it is not totally a bad thing but things can go bad. So I believe the OP is trying to advise men and women to avoid the need to avoid temptation.

Good. Everybody likes or tends to love those who are exceptionally good or care for them. But telling me that men and women are wired differently when it comes to that response is balderdash.

There is no justification to being a sexual nuisance and an individual with lack of self control and self esteem.

@Op how old are you??your point is foolish,childish and pathetic.....if u know u truly feel that employing a full grown maid is the problem then employ a male maid now ...or houseboys no dey??my point is a married man that sleeps with another woman that is not his wife is pathetic and we should condemn it and not try to justify nonsense....ok what about men that slept with their daughter??na the wife u go still blame??what about men that sleeps with small small girls wey never even get bre*ast...na the wife u go still blame abi??ode......or u know dey hear news......

Do not try to justify a man acting like a dog and with no self-control by sleeping with his maid all in the name of temptation.....nonsense...so many kids on Nairaland these days.......am sure if you hear a news that a woman slept with the houseboy you will be quick to call her dog,slut and several names but now you are trying to justify a man sleeping with his maid just because your foolishness and dumb upbringing made you to think men are permitted to act like a dog abi??while women should keep their body....fool!!!!

tete7000:


Op quoted a scripture to wrongfully give credence to man's lustfulness and his penchant for adultery . Has he not read in the same scripture that 'when a man is born again old things have passed away and all things have become new - 2Cor. 5:17' . We can't claim to know God and still be justifiably allowing our passion to rule us. St. Paul condemned sexual immorality and emphasises that self control is the gift of the holy spirit when he wrote in Galatians 5:19-23
'The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery ; 20 idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

22  But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. '

The word of God cannot and must not be used to justify evil. Evil irrespective of why we do it remain evil and can never find justification in the word of God for the same word of God says all evil doers shall be brought to condemnation. A lewd man is just a lewd man and it becomes very repugnant when we quote scripture out of context to justify lewdness. That part of the scripture quoted is simply expressing how baffling it is to see two people who have never known each other fall so much in love that they become inseparable. It doesn't support adultery in anyway. It does not justify a man who left his wife he claims to love to sleep with her maid and thus bring her wife to disrepute. Adultery is and remains a grave and mortal sin.

Ride on pastor preach it.

Oga Ade e don tey wey dem don dey preach say fornication na sin but has it stopped some people from doing it or will it stop even you from falling as an imperfect human?

Oga i don give my life to christ 27years ago and i know that while preaching against sexual sin will help,i also believe that we should flee just as the bible admonishes us so lets leave preaching for now and not take steps that will lead us to temptation.

LadyFiona:
[/b] Good. Everybody likes or tends to love those who are exceptionally good or care for them. But telling me that men and women are wired differently when it comes to that response is balderdash.

There is no justification to being a sexual nuisance and an individual with lack of self control and self esteem.

As i wrote,you cant understand.i will only advice you not to tempt that innocent man.

its one thing for a decent guy to go to work and subdue temptations from ladies out there and its a different ball game to come home everyday to meet a more dangerous temptation expecially the one that takes care of his tommy.

im surprised you are having issues with this.

Well,you can as well have the voluptuous Fiona and voluptuous gay if your wife brings them home.

Toks2008:


No matter how hard you try,you are not just capable of understanding this because as a lady,your brain is not wired like mine so i honestly dont know how to explain.

wait..do you think a man just wakes up and starts loving you? yes those curves or molds could catch his attention but it is the care you show that ignites that bond towards you.

how can a man eat a maid food,finds it delicious and not love her?

the elders were spot on when they said the way to a man s heart is tru his stomach.

Asking a maid to cook your husband food is tantamount to your hubby asking a man to scrw you..hard to comprehend shey?

if any lady gives up cooking of her husband meal to a maid,she had better give her to the husband as second wife.

If ladies cant understand this then i cant help beyond this.

Mehn Toks, u dont need to be all defensive. I asked a question. Still waiting for a direct answer.

Toks2008:


Its not about who seduces who.

There was a time an employee of my ex was giving me green light,she will wink at me at several occasions but God forbid i stoop that low but i also guess it was easier for me because she does not stay in same house.

These maids need not seduce you at all because there is no greater seduction than cooking delicious meals for you,making your bed,and generally caring for you even better than the career driven madam.

I won't lie here. It makes you feel and look gooood that you're being admired but acting on that is where problems lies, especially when you have someone that will be hurt in the process of actualising your obsessions. What I am mean is that it goes both ways for both men and women it is not exclusive to men, Once you got the fond glances/attentions/ flattering and the works from an admirer/coworker that you are not getting from your significant other, you fall flat if you are weak, unfaithful, amoral and a nincompoop.

Toks2008:


As i wrote,you cant understand.i will only advice you not to tempt that innocent man.

its one thing for a decent guy to go to work and subdue temptations from ladies out there and its a different ball game to come home everyday to meet a more dangerous temptation expecially the one that takes care of his tommy.

im surprised you are having issues with this.

Naaaa, not having issues at all but sad that you're justifying why men are too weak that they can fall for pants and bra that works for or with them.

Which kid? A forty years old man who thinks marrying early twenties,he will be doing them a favor. Go check his thread where he advise men to marry old ladies only. Always trying to speak for every man with his senseless posts.

wakacome:
@Op how old are you??your point is foolish,childish and pathetic.....if u know u truly feel that employing a full grown maid is the problem then employ a male maid now ...or houseboys no dey??my point is a married man that sleeps with another woman that is not his wife is pathetic and we should condemn it and not try to justify nonsense....ok what about men that slept with their daughter??na the wife u go still blame??what about men that sleeps with small small girls wey never even get bre*ast...na the wife u go still blame abi??ode......or u know dey hear news......

Do not try to justify a man acting like a dog and with no self-control by sleeping with his maid all in the name of temptation.....nonsense...so many kids on Nairaland these days.......am sure if you hear a news that a woman slept with the houseboy you will be quick to call her dog,slut and several names but now you are trying to justify a man sleeping with his maid just because your foolishness and dumb upbringing made you to think men are permitted to act like a dog abi??while women should keep their body....fool!!!!

So maids still exist

Its simple.. Just ask ur husband to bring his blood relative to stay with una.. If he decides to commit incest.. Then.. Even if you had brough a 5 yr old little gal.. Him for defile am too..

So.. Let d househelp always be ur husband's blood relative

peppyluv02:
Which kid? A forty years old man who thinks marrying early twenties,he will be doing them a favor. Go check his thread where he advise men to marry old ladies only. Always trying to speak for every man with his senseless posts.

I think I will just call him "an adult that thinks like a boy instead of a man" he is speaking based on his own pathetic way of reasoning.....

This is interesting topic. I like it.
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Omotayor123:
And yet one of my friends is insisting she can't get married without having a maid... Smh!

Nice piece OP.

and u are a lady??so u think not having a maid will stop a man that wants to act like a dog??what about husbands that sleeps with their in-laws??what about husbands that sleeps with their neighbours daughter??what about husbands that feels cheating is a way of life??





my point is having a maid is not the problem but the problem is a pathetic husband without self control....don't worry u will understand when u finally get married......


as a man let me be honest with you,you can only satisfy a responsible man as a wife,a man that is a cheat and an irresponsible and undisciplined man will still cheat on u even if you satisfy him in everything as a wife....a man that wants to cheat will cheat whether you are a good wife or not...go and ask toke makinwa...

kenny987:


According to the op, men are visual and polygamous. On the other hand women are blind and of course, monogamous! Somehow he has a justification. Just because another female assists hos wife with chores then he justifies her getting some of what madam gets. Then why not marry them all? Why marry one and destroy others? If madam deserves marriage then the maid deserves it too! I follow u hail dem o! Dem go rape woman finish still talk say na her fault cos she no wear 'decent' cloth!

Hi Kenny, just out of curiosity...
If a women is sexualy satisified, does she still desire to have sex with more men?

Guidette:

As for me i dont believe in that lack of self control thing. Unless soneone truly has a psychiatric problem, every single thought that comes through a persons mind is well calculated before they cheat. Besides men are not wired one way and women differently. Everyone is unique irregardless of gender. Society just loves to put labels on things which is called social conditioning.
Im very deconditioned from society bcs i do what i feel is right. And also speak up for injustice.
Anyways, my turn on is not particularly successful men bcs i am practically a doctor now but men who look very nice, hot, sexy and clean. Basically i am turned on by looks. I got my own money so all that other stuff doesnt really matter to me for now. Well at least dnt be a bum ass nigga.

Hi dear, i have 2 questions for you and need your honest answers.

1. Do you mean, at your status of a Dr, you can be sexualy involved with an official driver of a company? (they are usually well dressed, clean and fit)
2. Out of curiosity...
If a woman is sexualy satisified, does she still desire to have sex with more men?

Ok oo! Nkita!

snakebeat:

It's beyond comprehension because u're not a man. U need a higher logic to comprehend his message (the truth)...

Word!!!

wakacome:
and u are a lady??so u think not having a maid will stop a man that wants to act like a dog??what about husbands that sleeps with their in-laws??what about husbands that sleeps with their neighbours daughter??what about husbands that feels cheating is a way of life??





my point is having a maid is not the problem but the problem is a pathetic husband without self control....don't worry u will understand when u finally get married......


as a man let me be honest with you,you can only satisfy a responsible man as a wife,a man that is a cheat and an irresponsible and undisciplined man will still cheat on u even if you satisfy him in everything as a wife....a man that wants to cheat will cheat whether you are a good wife or not...go and ask toke makinwa...

If truly i love my wife and fear God then irrespective of what my maid does or what my wife does not do, should not be an excuse to LIGHT my maid,i mean if i LIGHT my maid i did because i wanted to LIGHT her and a wife who truly loves her man,understands her role and fear God should draw the line as to what the maid should do..It irritates me sometimes when people talk about this temptation in this context,nothing just happens, A man the bible says is tempted when he is drawn after his OWN lust..C'mon guys its high time men start taking responsibilities for their actions rather than keep blaming the devil who is chilling with his hot ORIJIN due to absence of freezer where he is.

ndidibabe:
I guess you are a full house wife. I'm a banker and I leave home as early as 5am and won't come back till 9pm due to traffic. Now, tell me how I can do without a maid. The mistake most ladies make today is to run after rich men and erase the word 'God fearing' from their dictionary. I'm happy for whom I am today and what my man has turned to be. He wasn't a millionaire when I met him but he was a very good christian . Today, he is rich and he is still very God fearing. We have two maids. The two of them have very big boobs but honestly, my man is too big to be randy .

if you are a dog, you are a dog. whether housemaid is mature or not

ideykwum:
You're wrong! There are many men with self control! I won't tell you about myself, but believe me, a lot can withstand the "temptations" from a housemaid! I'd rather do it outside with the variety of young eaglets from Uniport rather than a housemaid, someone's wife or a colleague at work!

ARE you naturally daft or ur just making a special effort today?

DaGeneral:
If truly i love my wife and fear God then irrespective of what my maid does or what my wife does not do, should not be an excuse to LIGHT my maid,i mean if i LIGHT my maid i did because i wanted to LIGHT her and a wife who truly loves her man,understands her role and fear God should draw the line as to what the maid should do..It irritates me sometimes when people talk about this temptation in this context,nothing just happens, A man the bible says is tempted when he is drawn after his OWN lust..C'mon guys its high time men start taking responsibilities for their actions rather than keep blaming the devil who is chilling with his hot ORIJIN due to absence of freezer where he is.

I love that part..a woman who truly loves her man understands her role.

Good

It's not the same bro. The maid there in the Bible refers not to househelp. Don't equate both.

Toks2008:


lol..

its the same bro lady,girl,woman,girl servant...a maid no be man nah habba.

peppyluv02:
Their reasoning and foolishness surprises even a goat. No wonder female animals see most Nigerian men and take to their heels.

This is not an acceptable way to vent spleen haba!!, the guy is entitled to his opinion.

quote author=Toks2008 post=36940659]

lol..

its the same bro lady,girl,woman,girl servant...a maid no be man nah habba.[/quote]

See who is talking about IQ..
You are such a good relationship counselor that you didn't realise the damage you did to that lady's life after dating her from the age of 19 and dumping her and 31... Why not end the relationship mid way or it was after 11 years you realized she wasn't good for you. Well,it's for her own good, she will get a better man not one that fantasies sleeping with every woman. Nkita!

Toks2008:


Why stress yourself reiterating?

Im not sorry to say this but only very few Nigeria ladies have sound IQ and when you read contrary opinions of this few,you will doff your hat for them

Every one castigating this factual write up have towed same line and i realized that no single one of them comprehended but were just focussed on making unwarranted sarcastic remarks but thats the fun though.

DrGroove:
ALL men sleep with maids...Once there is a female who is not related to the man by BLOOD living under his roof,he MUST sleep with her.until he does that,he cannot be a happy man! the younger she is,the more aroused he will be.Men don't need to see fully matured breasts and buttocks to be sexually attracted,anything female @ any stage of development is attractive enough(no be hole dem wan chook?).Those advocating for kids as maids,May God forgive you people..As if men are not happily bleeping kids in Nigeria today.

I completely disagree with you. I stay alone and have had two female maids (24 & 29yrs respectively) that come clean up everyday. One handles the interior and the other takes care of 4 adult dogs (bathing, feeding, cleaning of kernels). Tho they come late mornings and leave evenings, I get to meet them on weekends when am home. I have never for once had to urge nor even the thought of even admiring them nor wanting to sleep with them. They have worked for me 3yrs and counting.

Mindfulness:
So the solution is to employ kids instead of sending them to school so that men are not tempted because they are weak polygamous by nature?

Toks2008:


i was actually trying to point out that 13 to 15 are still minors and only a beast of a husband will stoop low to this level and if you see a 13 yr old maid with fully developed sexual features you can always go for another one.

Some men rape babies and employing underaged children is child abuse.

BETTER OPTIONS

1.Employ a married woman for day duty only.

2. Better still,do the chores yourself when your children are small and start training them at age 10. Even boys must learn to cook or they will have to patronise expensive or dirty eateries or marry just any woman when they leave home.

sapientia:
So maids still exist

Its simple.. Just ask ur husband to bring his blood relative to stay with una.. If he decides to commit incest.. Then.. Even if you had brough a 5 yr old little gal.. Him for defile am too..

So.. Let d househelp always be ur husband's blood relative

That's why a wife should have a cordial relationship with her in-laws.

bluice2:



I completely disagree with you. I stay alone and have had two female maids (24 & 29yrs respectively) that come clean up everyday. One handles the interior and the other takes care of 4 adult dogs (bathing, feeding, cleaning of kernels). Tho they come late mornings and leave evenings, I get to meet them on weekends when am home. I have never for once had to urge nor even the thought of even admiring them nor wanting to sleep with them. They have worked for me 3yrs and counting.

I equally have waitresses with the right shapes and curves in the right places who work at my bar; I still have not contemplated nor thought about sleeping with them. Not even for once.

Adeboyefa:




Some men rape babies and employing underaged children is child abuse.

BETTER OPTIONS

1.Employ a married woman for day duty only.

2. Better still,do the chores yourself when your children are small and start training them at age 10. Even boys must learn to cook or they will have to patronise expensive or dirty eateries or marry just any woman when they leave home.



That's why a wife should have a cordial relationship with her in-laws.

Intelligent point.