Eligible young women in Maiduguri, the Borno
State capital, are worried that the continued stay
of single girls in the Internally Displaced Persons
(IDPs) camps is threatening their chances of
getting married as many potential suitors are
abandoning them for those in the IDP camps for a
variety of reasons.
Some of the girl that spoke to Daily Trust, who
call themselves ‘city girls’, said all the girls in the
IDP camps are villagers who want to relocate to
the city that is why they are offering themselves
cheaply to men, referring to low bride prices and
other costs attached to marriage in the region.
Most of them, wearing long faces, lamented that
men who have dated prospective brides for years
have abandoned them for others in the IDP
camps, who accept impromptu marriage
proposals from men they do not know very well,
for the promise of a life away from the camps.
Most of the ‘city girls’ told Daily Trust that they
will not crash the prices of their dowry from the
usual N150,000 on the average to the N10,000
being paid for brides at the IDP camps,
maintaining that they are refined, polished and
have qualities that the girls in the IDP do not.
Falmata Bashir Modu, 23, is awaiting admission
into the University of Maiduguri and said the girls
in the IDP camps are actually a threat to single
girls in the city, because most men want low-cost
marriages are finding comfort there, adding,
“When someone whispered to me that the guy
proposing to marry my childhood friend is
abandoning her for an IDP bride, I could not
believe it. But it happened, just because he could
not afford N500,000 to N1 million. He went for a
rustic bride who I’m sure cannot even cook well.”
But Aisha Mustafa, 22, and a student of University
of Maiduguri said if it is just the cost of dowry
that will make her miss her suitor for another girl,
she is ready to convince her parents to reduce the
money to a bearable amount. “I cannot afford to
miss someone I love because of bride price. I’m
not for sale. There is a minimum amount fixed by
Islam as dowry and I do not mind asking for
that, once the love and understanding is there.
What I want is to enjoy my marriage with a man I
love,” she said.
Maimuna, a student of Sir Kashim Ibrahim College
of Education, Maiduguri, said she will not reduce
her dowry. “It is a matter of sitting him down and
telling him the advantages of going for the best. I
am sure he will understand,” she said.
Maimuna’s friend, also a student of the same
College of Education, who declined to identify
herself, said: “I’m aware that some men went to
IDP camps and paid N5,000 or N10,000 and got
brides. They rush for the IDPs because they do
not have to buy clothes and other traditional
requirements. It’s disturbing and something
needs to be done immediately.”
But 40-year-old widow Inna Usman said the IDP
girls are only a threat to other girls who are
desperate to marry. “Since my husband died, I
have not been keen on remarriage. I am facing
my business now. The IDP girls are posing a
challenge to ‘city girls’ and the men are not
willing to budge.”
Fatima Musa is a student of a secondary school
in Gwoza, and she escaped to Maiduguri, where
she is staying with her parents. She said the
issue of bride price is a matter that only parents
can address and that IDPs are entitled to marry.
“I don’t see any reason why men should not ask
for their hands in marriage.”
18-year-old Zainab Adamu of the University of
Maiduguri said she blames the men for the
situation. “Any man who abandons the girl he has
proposed to for one with supposedly less
economical cost does not know what he wants,”
she said.
She added that the rate at which men troop to
IDP camps in a rush to secure brides is alarming.
“I think it is time for government to relocate them
back to their various communities so that
everybody will rest,” she said.
Zainab Auwal, 27, said she is not afraid of the
IDP girls taking over her suitor because she is
educated and her suitor is only interested in
educated fine girl like her and not a girl that is
willing to give out herself in marriage so cheap.
24-year-old Hauwa Abubakar, also a student,
said a friend’s sister lost her suitor to an IDP girl.
“He complained of high bride price and before we
realised it, he had married an IDP bride.”
Miss Grace, a student of the University of
Maiduguri, told Daily Trust that there are
educated and non-educated girls both in the IDP
camps and among the so-called city girls. “The
fact is, the IDPs are less-demanding because
they’re eager for new lives away from the camps.
And the demands of the city girls are crazy, as far
as asking for N500,000 and above.”
Asma’u Suleiman, a student of Sir Kashim
Ibrahim College of Education, Maiduguri, said her
friend who is also a student of the same
institution lost her suitor to an IDP girl after four
years courtship. “I know my friend does not pay
much attention to him whenever he raised the
issue of marriage, but it was too harsh of him to
have abandoned her for the IDP. I was told that
the IDP girl used to visit him on campus, cook for
him and wash his clothes. The next thing we
heard was that they got married,” she said.
On their own part, the men who spoke to Daily
Trust said moderate dowries are not the only
factors causing them to go after the girls in the
IDP camps. Alhaji Fannami Marte said he married
his second wife from the IDP camp two months
ago, not just because it was easy on his pockets.
“Maiduguri girls have no time for their suitors
during courtship and they tend to be full of
themselves. It is either she is busy at home or
attending to her parents. I need enough time with
the girl I want to marry so that I can understand
her very well. The single girls in the IDP camps
give time and attention. Some of them are even
more beautiful and intelligent than the so-called
city girls,” he said.
Marte had accompanied a friend to an IDP camp,
where he met a girl. “She is beautiful and the
smile on her face attracted me and we got
talking. In three weeks, we got married and
without stress. Yes, she might have been born in
a village but she can fit in even in London,” he
said.
Kyari Modu, a civil servant, said he has witnessed
the marriages of seven of his friends to IDPs in
various camps in Maiduguri so far, but is yet to
marry one. “Only two of the seven men paid a
dowry of N10,000 each. All others paid N5,000
each and they are all living in peace. It’s love
that matters.”
Bana Alhaji Kyari is a trader at Bolori market in
Maiduguri and he married recently from an IDP
camp. “I married a beautiful woman, with good
character. All my neighbours envy me.”
Kyari told Daily Trust that he spent a total of
N14,500 for the marriage instead of the N300,000
he would have spent on a bride from Maiduguri.
“If I have my way, all men should go to IDP
camps and marry. They’re the best,” he said.
Maryam Isa Bulama is an IDP and she told Daily
Trust that a date has been fixed for her wedding
and does not care if her husband-to-be left any
city girl for her. She said: “It is not right - and
downright cruel - for anyone to say that IDPs are
rustic or illiterates. I am a graduate of Sociology
and there are girls here with Masters degrees. We
are victims of insurgency, and it could happen to
anyone. Going by the UN definition of a city,
Maiduguri is not even qualified to be one, even if
it is bigger than Bama where I come from.” She
added that women are not for sale, “Whatever
circumstance they may find themselves.”

www.dailytrust.com.ng/news/general/why-grooms-are-rushing-for-idp-brides/111479.html

cc lalasticlala

Lol, interesting read.

so, gals are now objects to be priced...ok oo.

PunkyVeer:
Lol, interesting read.

Very sweet and interesting indeed

wtfCode:
so, gals are now objects to be priced...ok oo.

Be4 nko?

Nl guys wht are we waiting for since the girls here are always forming.
Northern girls are always beautiful.

taking advantage of their helpless situation.