Hello All, I greet you.

Back then,as a lad I used to fantasized,loved,and craved for the idea of becoming a man,get MARRIED which will make me a happy fulfilled person,I said to myself that I won't have coit*s with any woman until i get married. But now, the zeal have declined, I dread the institution MARRIAGE. Someone told me it is GAMOPHOBIA "Fear of Marriage". That is by the way.

What climaxed this Fear more was when I read an article here on nairaland by killjoy "SEVEN REASONS GUYS SHOULD NEVER GET MARRIED". I was stricken by his point and felt he was talking to me. Well, I want to believe the institution of marriage was created for good and not for suffering.
I need to kill this Fear.

Dear Nairalanders,I just need your assertions,opinions, to the married ones what are d decisions you took before getting married,those once having this fear, how did you manage to overcome it?
Thank You.


Cc; lalasticlala,Friedplantain,Cutehector,Tallesty1,Yomieluv,Nobleval,Naijaboy,Mairole,ronald4lif,NashvilleTN,5minsmadness,tosyne2much,killjoy,HungerBAD

Remain single

Why do people hold on so much to the negative?

So because you've read a lot about failed or unhappy marriages, yours will be like that?

So the happy marriages around you can't motivate you? Or you know no happily married couples?


Anyway, for me, marriage remains one of the best thing that happened to me.. the love my spouse showers on me, no other can..

PresVA:
Why do people hold on so much to the negative?

So because you've read a lot about failed or unhappy marriages, yours will be like that?

So the happy marriages around you can't motivate you? Or you know no happily married couples?


Anyway, for me, marriage remains one of the best thing that happened to me.. the love my spouse showers on me, no other can..

People mistake matters dear and moreover they hold on to the negatives because it sucks.
Thanks for your positive assertions.

Serious?

Oyind17:
Remain single

Bros na quarrel?

Tallesty1:
Serious?

Mentor, like seriously sir.
I am feeling I need it,but don't want it.

So will u because of car accidents on daily basis not drive ur car?

that's like saying you won't take drugs because someone overdosed and died... marriage is sweet only when you marry for love.

Who is dat sayn marriage is sweet wen u marry for love....




Marriage isn't sweet, its bittersweet!

tosyne2much:
Bros, I think your mind has been corrupted and your brain has been brainwashed by the sorrowful experiences and/or perception of others.


Personally, I sometimes feel like I should remain single for as long as I live but I try to fight and overcome that feeling


OP, I think you have to recondition your mind and start seeing the good sides of marriage rather than dwelling in the experiences and perception of others

Oga Tosin, you too much. Tuale Sir.

There is a Paramount insight in this your comment.I appreciate

trapQ:
that's like saying you won't take drugs because someone overdosed and died... marriage is sweet only when you marry for love.

No that way Oga, Please sir read the context again and try to understand the way I am feeling about the ish.

virginboy1:


Oga Tosin, you too much. Tuale Sir.

There is a Paramount insight in this your comment.I appreciate

Oga mi, I loyal ooooo

virginboy1:
Hello All, I greet you.

Back then,as a lad I used to fantasized,loved,and craved for the idea of becoming a man,get MARRIED which will make me a happy fulfilled person,I said to myself that I won't have coit*s with any woman until i get married. But now, the zeal have declined, I dread the institution MARRIAGE. Someone told me it is GAMOPHOBIA "Fear of Marriage". That is by the way.

What climaxed this Fear more was when I read an article here on nairaland by killjoy "SEVEN REASONS GUYS SHOULD NEVER GET MARRIED". I was stricken by his point and felt he was talking to me. Well, I want to believe the institution of marriage was created for good and not for suffering.
I need to kill this Fear.

Dear Nairalanders,I just need your assertions,opinions, to the married ones what are d decisions you took before getting married,those once having this fear, how did you manage to overcome it?
Thank You.


Cc; lalasticlala,Friedplantain,Cutehector,Tallesty1,Yomieluv,Nobleval,Naijaboy,Mairole,ronald4lif,NashvilleTN,5minsmadness,tosyne2much,killjoy,HungerBAD

See?


Nairaland is Doing More Harm Than Good....

You read A Post On here By someone You know nothing Bout And that Changed Your Perspectives on Marriage? LoL! this is Laughabale!!!

Anyways...Happy Baby Mama-ing...since that's the new trend Nowadays...


PS...You ain't GAMOPHOBIC.....You're just A dude who gets Easily influenced by anything he reads... SAD!! this means You shouldn't visit some websites...You might just end up wanting to commit suicide because someone posted "SEVEN REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD COMMIT SUICIDE" "" smh!

tosyne2much:
Bros, I think your mind has been corrupted and your brain has been brainwashed by the sorrowful experiences and/or perception of others.


Personally, I sometimes feel like I should even remain single for as long as I live but I try to fight and overcome that feeling each time it interlocks my mind


OP, I think you have to recondition your mind and start seeing the good sides of marriage rather than dwelling in the experiences and perception of others

Well said!
OP this is what you need.
I was like you and was terrified of marriage a few months back.
But I decided to re-condition my mind and concentrate on the positives.
I had faced the negatives for far too long.
It worked for me.

Godmother:

Well said! OP this is what you need. I was like you and was terrified of marriage a few months back. But I decided to re-condition my mind and concentrate on the positives. I had faced the negatives for far too long. It worked for me.

Thank you so much sis

Estharfabian:
See?


Nairaland is Doing More Harm Than Good....

You read A Post On here By someone You know nothing Bout And that Changed Your Perspectives on Marriage? LoL! this is Laughabale!!!

Anyways...Happy Baby Mama-ing...since that's the new trend Nowadays...


PS...You ain't GAMOPHOBIC.....You're just A dude who gets Easily influenced by anything he reads... SAD!! this means You shouldn't visit some websites...You might just end up wanting to commit suicide because someone posted "SEVEN REASONS WHY YOU SHOULD COMMIT SUICIDE" "" smh!

Hmmmm, Aunty is that your prayer for me?
I read something factual on this platform that influenced my thinking about marriage negatively and here you are yarning opata .Well, Am not surprised since it is coming from a lady. You don't understand and you don't care to.

Have you never read anything online or offline that stimulated your perception about things?

Na wa for you ooo....Aunty

Godmother:


Well said!
OP this is what you need.
I was like you and was terrified of marriage a few months back.
But I decided to re-condition my mind and concentrate on the positives.
I had faced the negatives for far too long.
It worked for me.

Nice one, thanks a lot.

More reason I created this thread. I appreciate.

virginboy1:

Nice one, thanks a lot.

More reason I created this thread. I appreciate.

You have been given good advice already.

If you notice, nairaland dwells a lot on the negatives of things. Bad news draws more traffic which means more money for the site. It thrives on shocking news, e-wars and unending arguments. Without this nairaland will be hard pressed to move forward. I will advice you log off for a while and look at the people around you. Realize what you want and go for it. Marriage comes as a natural inclination, a natural yearning. It isn't meant to be forced on anyone.

When you see the person that "completes you", you'll be the one yearning for marriage. I believe you are still a young chap and have a lot of experiences to gather in life. Don't worry so much about it.

If it will help I can give you a link to one of my old topics(see link below). But i still say the best way to overcome this attitude is to stop reading all these negative articles on marriage that abound on nairaland, strive to attain your goals, make healthy friendly relationships with the opposite sex and marriage will come along naturally.

Good luck.


https://www.nairaland.com/1896915/good-marriages-not-make-good#26189229

lalasticlala , please put it on front page,there might be plenty guys like me facing this phobia

5minsmadness:


You have been given good advice already.

If you notice, nairaland dwells a lot on the negatives of things. Bad news draws more traffic which means more money for the site. It thrives on shocking news, e-wars and unending arguments. Without this nairaland will be hard pressed to move forward. I will advice you log off for a while and look at the people around you. Realize what you want and go for it. Marriage comes as a natural inclination, a natural yearning. It isn't meant to be forced on anyone.

When you see the person that "completes you", you'll be the one yearning for marriage. I believe you are still a young chap and have a lot of experiences to gather in life. Don't worry so much about it.

If it will help I can give you a link to one of my old topics(see link below). But i still say the best way to overcome this attitude is to stop reading all these negative articles on marriage that abound on nairaland, strive to attain your goals, make healthy friendly relationships with the opposite sex and marriage will come along naturally.

Good luck.


https://www.nairaland.com/1896915/good-marriages-not-make-good#26189229

Thank you so much sir for your concern. You are right indeed.

Well, marriage system in this our contemporary naija society now seems complicated,which is making bachelors like me feel paranoid about it.

purge yourself first of negative thoughts.



marriage is sweet,but takes a lot of determination to make it work.


pray to marry an understanding wife,and you will be fulfilled,otherwise you will be finished.

Take osogbo weeds,beats ur mum u'll surely ovacum ur fears. I said that thread was 4rm d pits of hell

And I thought only women dey fear Marriage.....

Oyind17:
Remain single

Badt girl



OP try reading about those with successful marriage. Take your mind off negativity you've heard about being married.

virginboy1:

Mentor, like seriously sir.
I am feeling I need it,but don't want it.

Lol, do what I said earlier don't marry, you don't have a mind of your own

Omotayor123:

Badt girl



OP try reading about those with successful marriage. Take your mind off negativity you've heard about being married.

You get time dey advice this one.

Bawo ni?

Oyind17:
You get time dey advice this one.
Bawo ni?

Mo wa pa

[quote author=Oyind17 post=39161866]
Lol, do what I said earlier don't marry, you don't have a mind of your own [/quote
How old are you? no offense

Omotayor123:

Badt girl



OP try reading about those with successful marriage. Take your mind off negativity you've heard about being married.

Omotayor thanks alot, You make sense

[quote author=virginboy1 post=39168656][/quote]
older enough to advice u not to marry