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Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by cococandy(f): 8:41pm On Nov 11, 2015 |
Well that's part of the problem. The fact that you felt you needed some people to act like that around you in the first place to affirm your manhood. Chubhie: 2 Likes |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Chubhie: 9:05pm On Nov 11, 2015 |
cococandy:quite different from what you are thinking.From when I was a kid people treat me nice out of respect for the kinda mother I have. I never wanted all those stuffs. I was a rebel who wanted his own thing built through sweat,smart and hardwork.Naturally people are kind towards me maybe cos I feel I'm a good human. Truth is I treasure my privacy. |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Nobody: 9:13pm On Nov 11, 2015 |
cococandy: Self-made problem. Nice observation. 2 Likes |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Nobody: 9:59pm On Nov 11, 2015 |
naijaboiy:for your mind Nice Op, that is if they will hear. |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Fkforyou(m): 10:01pm On Nov 11, 2015 |
It's common sense, if you don't define your self other people will define you and you will always be susceptible to their opinion.... The irony is that,their defination of you is most atimes based on their insecurities most especially on what they hate about them selves. 1 Like |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by 5minsmadness: 10:19pm On Nov 11, 2015 |
The men have said it all on the first page of this thread. Sorry op but this your topic is for the beta males, those westernized wimps that are in touch with their emotions and "feminine side" A real man doesnt need all this psychological mumbo jumbo to know that he is a man. He needs no validation from anyone other than himself. [size=5pt]See all them females falling over themselves to commiserate with the post. We dont need your validation!Thank you![/size] 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Griffon(m): 11:21pm On Nov 11, 2015 |
MizMyColi: This is a healthy perspective, but then, don't you think you'll be discouraging some slothful men from striving for greatness on the ground that they've got nothing to prove to anyone? The way I see it, a real man is one who's doing something right. That includes, having a clear definition of his life, working towards a predetermined goal and reaching out to the people around him. Most men who had ignorantly subscribed the 'I no send them' idea, are found sitting idly in front of their homes everyday collecting free greetings from passersby. The 'I no send them' thinking has been enshrined in most men's modus operandi and has turned out to be the bane of their existence. In a nutshell, men should start 'sending wetin people go talk and then allow the criticisms to kick them to life. Every real man should understand that criticisms are only there to serve as a springboard that'll help lift him and that by working hard enough, he isn't angling to earn a petty validation but he's working towards greatness. 1 Like |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by armyofone(m): 12:45am On Nov 12, 2015 |
7 inches still the supreme manhood Stillfire: |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by armyofone(m): 12:49am On Nov 12, 2015 |
Reclaimed manhood, which one is that again eh. So manhood could be declaimed? cococandy: |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by cococandy(f): 2:57am On Nov 12, 2015 |
armyofone: |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by armyofone(m): 3:15am On Nov 12, 2015 |
It was for the one who reclaimed his manhood from the lady who stopped kneeling down to serve him food. The whole thing confused me. How are you, hope doing good and not craving like me cococandy: |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by ronald4lif(m): 3:30am On Nov 12, 2015 |
Griffon: LMAO @ embolded. I don laugh die. I agree with you here. Human's need a spur to motivate them into becoming resourceful and hardworking. Something that would make us sit up and embrace the fact that life waits for no one and everyday counts. While growing up my father would always remind us that life is a battle field and we should assume that everyday it's a new challenge requiring a different method of approach as no two days are thesame. And if we must scale through and succeed we should always harbour this in mind. He'd remind me in particular that I should never depend on anyone for livelihood not even my elder brothers who were providing me with everything I needed at that time as they might disappoint me in the future, when he might have gone and by which time it might be too late to make amends. Those words are like an afflatus, muse and influential in shaping my life and approach towards life. It takes more than just breathing, eating and sleeping to live life. One has to develop themselves everyday in whatever they do. Be it studying, working or whatever they specialise on. Be at the top of it. Lastly, I'm very comfortable when a fellow guy employs any of those cliche lines on me about being a real man than when a lady does. Reason being that she might be falsely assuming or think that it's only men who should work hard and be successful. The conception that men are to strive harder in life more than females is baseless and Victorian. If a man should be 'real' a woman too should. 4 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by cococandy(f): 5:39am On Nov 12, 2015 |
armyofone:Yea I understood you initially. I'm doing awesome. Thanks Happy veteran's day |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Cutehector(m): 6:18am On Nov 12, 2015 |
[size=20pt]I am a real man![/size] |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Griffon(m): 6:37am On Nov 12, 2015 |
ronald4lif: There you are, doing what you know best, making sense. Aristotle would say, ''to avoid criticism say nothing, do nothing, be nothing. That subtly summarises what happens to a man who have decided to avoid people's views. |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by armyofone(m): 6:45am On Nov 12, 2015 |
Happy Veterans day. The off day too short and the darkness @ early hours not fun. Glad to hear that cococandy: |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by cococandy(f): 7:07am On Nov 12, 2015 |
armyofone:Exactly. I didn't even know when the day went by. Mtchew. For my their mind now we get one day off. Off to bed so I can be about tomorrow. Didn't feel like I took a break at all. |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by cococandy(f): 7:09am On Nov 12, 2015 |
It seems like some folks are misunderstanding the OP. I don't see how that post says a man should be lazy or whatever inference y'all are drawing from it. It is well. 2 Likes |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Nobody: 7:22am On Nov 12, 2015 |
cococandy: Understanding is deep nne. The thread is not in anyway encouraging laziness, no sane woman would validate a lazy man. The thread is directed at real men who are trying their best, but somehow the society and ladies around them think otherwise. They say they don't validation, try saying the men in your lives are the only reasonable men on earth and watch some of them come for you like an anticipated prey. If humans don't need validation, why do we have/need promotion at work. Why not sit on your desk, do your work, don't get promoted and convince yourself you're the fhucking best. 4 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Griffon(m): 7:47am On Nov 12, 2015 |
cococandy: In psychology, negative affectivity relates to different classes of variable. The Op's assertion that a man is a real man simply 'cos he exists is quite flawed. Such claim is capable of washing out a man's willpower and hunger to hustle, such claim is capable of reconfigurating a man's thought process. When as an individual you don't have an external drive, you're likely to falter midway. A real man isn't that man who's just living and doesn't need people's validation. I know mizmycoli means well with the write-up, but psychology doesn't quite agree with her on this. |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Griffon(m): 7:48am On Nov 12, 2015 |
Kachisbarbie: I love you already. 1 Like |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by MizMyColi(f): 8:16am On Nov 12, 2015 |
Griffon As you can see, Cococandy and Kachisbarbie are doing justice to the topic at hand. Truth is, I have deliberately avoided commenting on the topic....talk of being lazy. You know it requires intellectual effort to engage your ilk.... I no ready to board that bus now... Except you coerce me |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by joseph1832(m): 8:49am On Nov 12, 2015 |
Kachisbarbie:The difference is at work we get validated so we can get paid. Promotion means increase in salary, its that simple, but when you get validated by people does it add a single kobo to your account? 3 Likes |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Griffon(m): 9:28am On Nov 12, 2015 |
joseph1832: Validations are like incentives, they give you reasons to work better, smarter and harder. We must welcome them, just as we must welcome criticisms, they are there to spur us up. It must not necessarily add a penny to your account. |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Griffon(m): 9:31am On Nov 12, 2015 |
MizMyColi: Let's for once place aside this love we have for eachother and war intellectually. You've been avoiding that for aeons, shey you think I don't know? |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Friday18: 9:32am On Nov 12, 2015 |
Waiting for a counter post - Dear lady you have nothing to prove. |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by joseph1832(m): 9:39am On Nov 12, 2015 |
Griffon:To you validation are like incentives. To me, its not!. Never forget, in Nigeria today, money is the highest motivating factor, not kind words. Any incentives that doesn't add a penny to my pocket goes through my right ear, and comes out via the left. Dude, amidst all what you said you must learn to be very practical in your analysis, THIS IS NIGERIA People tend to work harder when the pay is better than work harder when they're given just kind words of encouragement. 1 Like |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by bukatyne(f): 9:50am On Nov 12, 2015 |
Kachisbarbie: |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by bukatyne(f): 9:53am On Nov 12, 2015 |
ronald4lif: Isn't strange that it was during a woman's rule that things went topsy turvy for females? If she believed in those nonsense she propagated, why did she not relinquish the throne for her husband or male relative with a claim to the throne? 2 Likes |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by MizMyColi(f): 10:01am On Nov 12, 2015 |
Griffon: When it comes to people I hold dear The principle of live and let live holds sway. |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Griffon(m): 11:09am On Nov 12, 2015 |
joseph1832: An Incentive is a thing that motivates or encourages one to do something. Validation on the other hand is getting feedback from others that “what I do and what I say matters to you. You hear me. You see me. You think of me. You thank me. You acknowledge my accomplishments. You appreciate my efforts.” If you cant spot the correlation in the two then I'm sorry I can't help you. Incentives must not always come in money form, get your dictionary and come good on this debate. |
Re: Dear Guys; You Have Nothing To Prove. by Griffon(m): 11:15am On Nov 12, 2015 |
MizMyColi: I understand where you're coming from with regards to the write-up. We must not wait for validation from people but to try and give it to ourselves. But then, I only had to pick on you 'cos you missed a line like this ''When you recognize your good traits, you are not being narcissistic. When you praise yourself for your accomplishments, you are not being self-centered. Praising yourself and let the praise you receive from others be the icing on the cake.'' See, the emboldened in same breath is encouraging you to work hard and praise yourself. It isn't informing the public that you're a real man just because you exist instead it's saying a real man is one who has recognized his good traits and is praising himself for his accomplishments. We would war some day honey, in the meantime, how is your day moving? 2 Likes 3 Shares |
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