mudility : Thanks. She should have approach me privately when am calm to advise me on my anger not in front of the other worker. If i don't do anything about this,other workers may copy her rudeness.

OP u posted this thing up. OK. please read the post again u will discover something.
I will reply the post to give u my discovery n my advice I.e if u will need it

dazzlingd:
immaturity..
u need to play a mind game here....
if u sack her, she will make a cheap blackmail out of it...
guy, u sud be a big boy nah, go get a girl hotter than her, flaunt wat u've got and deal with her on a very formal note.

If she does not quit in regret, come back here and quote me.

Pls follow the above she go cool down know her level

I told you then not to ever get involved in office romance. Kill the fucking crush. She does not have to get the pink slip..

It was wrong to start with to ask your employee out on a date. However without further delay and unnecessary sentiment, come month end,offer her her salary and without remorse give her a sack letter with a straight face.
Though a lot will be said at your back,that's your back,just keep your head up and remain focus. If any other employee acts funny, fire him or her. Basic!

refiner:
sack her and employ me instead......hope u re satisfied nw

hahaha, don't complain when he starts crushing on you either.

E be like say na pure water business with 3 employees you dey do. Maybe sales na only N60k a month. Otherwise, I honestly can't imagine how the girl would 'fall your hand' like that if you had even decent cash flow and a flourishing business with desirable salary for employees, unless you are evidently a big love-struck wussie with very poor self-will which is obvious to the girl. Let's be clear, in Nigeria, a boss with self-will shall either have his way with any employee that he desires sexually or she leaves the organisation. There is hardly ever a third option. I have never seen where an employee turns you down and then grows wings. Growing wings is a privilege attached to sleeping with the boss, not turning him down.

Besides, as a boss you don't "ask" a girl out. In fact, I always advise guys - broke or rich - to never "ask" a girl out. I have not done that now for almost a decade. Doing that often subconsciously makes them exhibit courtship behaviour. Makes them feel important in spite of their nothingness. You should never put yourself in this inferior position by "asking" them out.

You should simply 'get along' with her in a seductive manner (it is called game, and has many variations) without declaring your love or any intentions; arrange outings or avenues for personal communication and then inject her with the heat of seduction until she gets the message and either does the needful or gives you clues that you need not continue to waste time on her. It is too childish ask a girl out, like, "hey Obianuju, I really love you, can you be my girlfriend, can we start having an affair, can we, basically, have sex"? I mean, WTF. You expect her to scream yesssss? You be Trey Songz abi Diezani son?

When you want something, don't ask for it. Take it. Most of them aren't really sure of what they want anyway, so when you ask, they often say no by default... Only to be dragged away by one loser who has enough self-will to TAKE what he wants without asking.

Don't be trigger happy to sack her yet.
Apply wisdom...first!
My advice: have a one on one meeting with her, and discuss her recent behavior towards you.
Tell her you will not tolerate her disrespecting you in the office premises.
Whatever you do, do not mention the incidence when you asked her out, I repeat, do not bring up that topic, just pretend it never happened.
You're the Boss, so behave and act like one!
Let this be her final warning!
I swear, if she see you again, na so tey she go dey call you 'Sir' 'Sir'.










Thank me later!

mudility:

Thanks. She should have approach me privately when am calm to advise me on my anger not in front of the other worker. If i don't do anything about this,other workers may copy her rudeness.

to me, sacking her is not the next thing. call her and let her know you won't tolerate her insolence. she seems immature and may start broadcasting that you sacked her just because she refused your advances.

I am not here to criticize you jare we all make mistakes nobody is above it except God that created us. If you liked her and approached her and she refused it's ok. U respected her view but she is taking advantage of that fact then she isn't mature. What I think you should do is, talk to her about her attitude towards work and ur customers if she doesn't change then u can sack her and tell her the reason behind the sack. And pls never be in d same room or office alone with her if not she may frame u up. Just be careful. We girls are darin/!

stupidity:
So becoz she nor gree give you pvssy gonk, u wan sack her!!

Na u give her body see finish na, u go dey toast smally wey dey work under you, why she nor go get boldness.

just like ur name

schumastic:
i had a strong feeling it will lead to this after you Adler her out and she refused...mean while i poker the fact you made her know your still the boss and you'r in control..don't sack her cus she might use the fact that you asked her out and she refused that's why you sacked her.

instead keep being the good boss you are and this time show more seriousness and less laughter, try not to joke or give her face at all..be strict with the job and put her in her place when ever she mess up.

Easier said than done. The truth is that the lady is not mature, and she's not managing the opportunity she had well.apart from the rudeness to boss,there are other two bad issues- late coming to work and flirting with customers. These two issues will be hurting the boss. You refused the boss but like his customers to inspire jealousy,too childish; and lateness to pull down business? That she needs to exit the place to help boss regain composure and authority is not in dispute,but her exit strategy is what we should be talking about. This is becaus,that kind of lady will assemble your staff and customers and tell them you sacked her because she refused you( the op).
If you can afford it, and since you said you valued her service, then keep her if only you can open a new branch and send her there,be firm and never mix busines with pleasure again. I remember, u said there could be exception, but you LL agree u were hasty not to have noticed that this immature lady can't be the exception. May God help you and your business.

Grinch:
That's what happens when u start showing little kids ur di*k

Just go and get married to a woman of your choice and stop crushing on other people's daughters. You spoiled the show and lost your self respect (if any) when you wanted to enter in bw her legs. Remember, she didn't join your employ for you to mess her up. I guess she has her life to live without tampering with or altering it. Or is there term and conditions of employing females into your company to ' first crush' them?

hedonistic:
E be like say na pure water business with 3 employees you dey do. Maybe sales na only N60k a month. Otherwise, I honestly can't imagine how the girl would 'fall your hand' like that if you had even decent cash flow and a flourishing business with desirable salary for employees, unless you are evidently a big love-struck wussie with very poor self-will which is obvious to the girl. Let's be clear, in Nigeria, a boss with self-will shall either have his way with any employee that he desires sexually or she leaves the organisation. There is hardly ever a third option. I have never seen where an employee turns you down and then grows wings. Growing wings is a privilege attached to sleeping with the boss, not turning him down.

Besides, as a boss you don't "ask" a girl out. In fact, I always advise guys - broke or rich - to never "ask" a girl out. I have not done that now for almost a decade. Doing that often subconsciously makes them exhibit courtship behaviour. Makes them feel important in spite of their nothingness. You should never put yourself in this inferior position by "asking" them out.

You should simply 'get along' with her in a seductive manner (it is called game, and has many variations) without declaring your love or any intentions; arrange outings or avenues for personal communication and then inject her with the heat of seduction until she gets the message and either does the needful or gives you clues that you need not continue to waste time on her. It is too childish ask a girl out, like, "hey Obianuju, I really love you, can you be my girlfriend, can we start having an affair, can we, basically, have sex"? I mean, WTF. You expect her to scream yesssss? You be Trey Songz abi Diezani son?

When you want something, don't ask for it. Take it. Most of them aren't really sure of what they want anyway, so when you ask, they often say no by default... Only to be dragged away by one loser who has enough self-will to TAKE what he wants without asking.

You too get sense.

mudility:
Hey pals, if you have read my previous post https://www.nairaland.com/2738913/love-employee you will remember i was crushing on one of my female worker.

After i hastily made my intentions known to her, I was given those kind of funny attitude ladies display when not interested.

On a one on one discussion, she said she will not date me for two reasons. 1. because i am her boss and 2. because she has a boyfriend.

Okay, i totally respect her decision but i realized her attitude changed. She sometimes arrives late to work, flirt with my costumers to make me jealous. The final straw that broke the camel back is when i was scolding my other worker for her mistakes and complains am getting from my customers about her.

What i heard was this my employee i had crush on saying to me with boldness that i dont have to talk to her that way. I was shocked to my bone marrow that i ordered her to keep quit and leave my presence.

After i got home, i could not stop thinking about her rude bahaviour. I almost payed her off today but the sympathetic me decide to keep her till month end.

Pls friends , what do u think about my intended plan?

Your decision is a result of her refusal, take it or leave it.
So if you lay her off, its for same reason.
Why dont you try give her words of caution. Perhaps warning her.

author=mudility post=41132135]

schumastic:
i had a strong feeling it will lead to this after you Adler her out and she refused...mean while i poker the fact you made her know your still the boss and you'r in control..don't sack her cus she might use the fact that you asked her out and she refused that's why you sacked her.

instead keep being the good boss you are and this time show more seriousness and less laughter, try not to joke or give her face at all..be strict with the job and put her in her place when ever she mess up.

1. NO NEED to sack her!
.
2. Now that u've put her to her place (with ur rebuke during d last incidence), she knows u don't give a hoot abt.........., so continue relating with her only on a FORMAL level-even when u are alone with her. No flirting, no sheepish smiles from u, no extra-attention on her, no asking about her day/night/weekend/feelings etc, leave those "flirty" questions 2 her
boyfriend(s)! Sooner than later, she'll get d drift that u've moved on.
.

3. EQUITY:
Don't give her ANY preferential treatment. Treat her as u would any other staff. Immature ppl tend to abuse such privileges.
.
4. For emphasis, NO NEED to sack her!!! Just keep on showing her dt u are d boss!
.
# shikena
#imecha
#lobatan

Lovelynature:
hahaha, don't complain when he starts crushing on you either.

am nt as beautiful as his crush,,,so he can't crush on me.....dere is a merit of been ugli after all.....

I will advise you dont sack her now. Give her a query first. Then suspension before sack. I hope you realize you will be tampering with her source of income due to your selfish sexual fantasies. Dont make yourself more of an enemy.

You have spoilt the whole thing by approaching someone you work with without being absolutely sure she feels the same way.

refiner:


am nt as beautiful as his crush,,,so he can't crush on me.....dere is a merit of been ugli after all.....

beauty they say, is in the eyes of the beholder. You never can tell.

Besides, you are quite pretty.

End time sack

2sex:
he isn't bill Gates is he?

one can't know if it'll work out till they try at times. I know of a man that married his sales girl.

1) op

u complained about her attitude n came back to say what she should have done... u have deep feeling for her u don't want to fire the her.

op if u don't have deep feeling for this Lady u would have fired her b4 and the post will read HOW I FIRED MY FEMALE EMPLOYEE.

my advice
DON'T SACK HER. DONT JUST THROW SACK LETTER ANYHOW LIKE A COWARD. YOU ARE THE BOSS IN A THE MIDDLE A CHALLENGE. U SIT DOWN AND WORK YOUR BRAIN. U SOUND LIKE AN emotional COWARD TO ME (no apology).

that some one works for u, means u can hand her 1 WK susp. u can change her sitting position. u can make her a scape goat.
AGAIN DONT SACK HER its part of the challenge as a boss.

2nd Advice
Be mean and transparent with her and withdraw every kindness and generosity (for women love been treated specially) she will come seeking your privacy.

3rd
if you r a boss ...don't just be a boss learn from every 1,every thing,everywhere.. it will help u manage the next employee unless otherwise u can sack. when u sack employee so quickly it may not always favor u

4th
some employers like to have fun with their employee. its always calculated. no matter how stunning that person may look put ur plan B in order (so that it does nt affect office environment) before embarking on such adventure.

5th

Lovelynature:
beauty they say, is in the eyes of the beholder. You never can tell.

Besides, you are quite pretty.

fanx tho Buh y complaining,since he has almost made up his mind to sack her,,incase he do,den he shuld employ me....Nofin more

Op: Be sure the rest of your employees knows what up already,cos she has told them,she has probably boast of how she will misbehave and u won't do shiit about it,if it where me this is what I'd do.
1. Call a meeting.
Tell them how you appreciate how hard they work ,and how good of an employee they are.
2. Apologise.
Yes apologise. This will take balls. Tell them you are the boss,but you broke your professional ethic by letting your emotions influence your position and business and thus it has started to effect the conduct of your employees,and that you failed to lead by example. And such should never repeat itself.
3. Call her by name(because they all know by now what's up).
Apologise to her. Tell her you are sorry that you let your intentions known to her,tell her your feelings where honest and you had no bad intentions. Then proceed to tell her that in as much as your approaching her was your fault that her conduct and undermining of your authority isn't your fault,she should know that even if she were your wife,in that office,you are her boss and should conduct herself as thus.
4. Pay her up for the month and FIRE HER,make she learn.

This will earn you both admiration and respect.

misspicy:
lol.....the girl is not even matured enough.... why become rude to your boss
because he asked you out?

OP sack her already,she never experience life

This your signature na wa o!

If you want others to give you maximum production, pay her off and tell her the reason.

i can't blame you.
anyway, let misbehave again and give two weeks suspension without pay. and damn the consequence whether she comes back or not. thanks.

Well I don't see anything wrong in asking out whoever you have feelings for, employee or whoever. It is the lady that has issues. It's a very simple thing. Say yes or no and continue with your work and act as if nothing happened. It happened to me thrice and my answers were all no. But that never changed anything. In fact, my Yes Sir! Increased such that they never felt bad about my rejection, it only made them like me more.

Sacking her for now is very immature and unprofessional. Pretend like nothing personal happened between you both. Deal with her professionally. Give her warning letter and/or query(ies). If she loves herself she should change. IF not, FIRE her sharp sharp.

let her misbehave again and give her two weeks suspension without pay. and damn the consequence whether she comes back or not. thanks.

In USA.. She has become your boss because you won't be able to fire her unless you have enough evidence that she is not doing her job diligently. She will simply sue you.

It's funny but I 100% understand you.

I ran a few hospitality businesses and dealt with this scenario over and over again ie. attractions between me and the female workers I had. In most of my situations, the grils were the ones who made moves on me and most of the time I had to let them down gently...but it was never the same and it affected their work. In one particular situation, actually the last sistuation I faced before I left the job, I made the move and I was successful....but again it affected her work.

The truth is when the cat is let out of the bag... things can never be the same...and young Nigerian girls don't take it well.

You have to sack her and unfortunately you are and have to be the bad guy in the story.... I learnt it the hard way in all my situations, even when I didn't give in and tried to let them down gently. Your guilt just means you are human and is the price you have to pay for being a boss who allowed temptation to flourish.

At the end of the day you will find out it is the best decison for you and more importantly, her too.