Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! - Family (5)

Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! - Family (5) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum › Nairaland General › Family › Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! (38847 Views)

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by bizgai(m): 7:18pm On Dec 30, 2015

Trendition:
Got married two years ago to a now 34year old man, and I am 26. Met him through my mum when he came into the country 3years ago, so we dated for about 9months. We got married but he had to remain in canada while I stayed back.

Truth be told, I never loved him. He's rich, okay-looking, charming and all but I just do not love him. I married him cos I kinda saw him as a clean slate, a chance to start anew cos I have lived life, done things that I am not proud of, gotten heart broken. And I just don't want kids with a man I do not love. They say u can fall in love after marriage but not here, I just admire my husband.

Hubby comes home in December and stays through to february. I kept d pills in an empty bottle of multivitamins but never thought he'ld look closely at d inscriptions on the tablets cos I had gotten away with it the past years. No one has been on my neck about getting pregnant though.

He was so angry I thought he'ld throw me out that night. He's been sleeping in d guests', doesn't eat my food, he says I am a selfish and wicked woman. I'm sooooo scared he'll call my parents, I'll just die.

Do I just walk out now and risk my parents knowing what really happend? Will I find such a gentle man again? Do I get pregnant? will I love my kids? He's such a wonderful man but I don't love him!!!

PS: I never cheated on him

u said you're 26 abi,? ? Continue with the drug hopefully in the next 5 year's or more you might fall in LOVE with him as a Second Wife.

1 Like

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Nobody: 7:24pm On Dec 30, 2015

olukenzo:
Really? Pardon my asking, where do you live here? And for how long?

Somewhere in Scotland. Very close to yours. It is a small city. Take a guess sad

This is my third year

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Nobody: 7:25pm On Dec 30, 2015

daretodiffer:
Somewhere in Scotland. Very close to yours. It is a small city. Take a guess

This is my third year

Dundee!

Undergraduate studies or permanent residence?

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Nobody: 7:26pm On Dec 30, 2015

olukenzo:
Dundee!

What about St Andrews

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Nobody: 7:34pm On Dec 30, 2015

daretodiffer:
What about St Andrews

Wow, nice, the home of golf and 1st class uni. I learnt it's a lovely city. Under Fife. Never been there.

Are you at St Andrews uni?

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by tolman061(m): 7:41pm On Dec 30, 2015

Story dat touch...sad***

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Askseek(f): 7:47pm On Dec 30, 2015

daretodiffer:
Nairaland

Are you new?

Nope not new, I understand the typical nairalander's need to assume just expected different from you is all

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Nobody: 7:49pm On Dec 30, 2015

Askseek:
Nope not new, I understand the typical nairalander's need to assume just expected different from you is all

That was a sarcastic response cheesy

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Coolgent(m): 8:07pm On Dec 30, 2015

I pray u didnt engaged youself in adultery

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by khattab02: 8:10pm On Dec 30, 2015

Also Op, you seems to be worried about your parents knowing (good, sign of regret) but you should be more than worried about his parents knowing, because no parents will hear such story from their son and take it lightly with you.

Ball is still in your court, you should apologize to him, beg him for forgiveness and make sure he doesn't tell your parents or his, that is if you still want the marriage or else........ No point in trying to pretend love to him or having his kids.

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by banio: 8:21pm On Dec 30, 2015

Story 4 the gods. U said in the past U did things U were not proud of. Are U proud of this one?.
Pls I beg U with whatever U hold secret, divorce the man. If the man finds out other details which U did not mention here, I foresee big trouble....

1 Like

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by raumdeuter: 8:24pm On Dec 30, 2015

deniyor:
This is why it's difficult for diaspora folks to trust the love of a naija woman.
I think previous comments have done justice to my opinion

Unless you have been dating before you travelled, its extremely foolish for anyone to go home and pick a wife when there are millions of female in the country you reside

I have little sympathy for those kain guys who travel home to import wifes they barely knew

4 Likes

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Omoboy(m): 8:24pm On Dec 30, 2015

I bet you this woman has a boyfriend somewhere

1 Like

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Mamatee07: 8:29pm On Dec 30, 2015

MosakuAW:
First thing first, ask for God forgiveness.

Secondly, ask your hubby for forgiveness.

Thirdly, throw away tablets.

Fourthly, get pregnant and learn to love your husband thereafter. During your pregnancy, your hubby may show more signs of love towards you and the upcoming baby that you may fall in love with.

You should have never get married to him since you dont love him from the begining, since you are married you must learn how to love him. Leaving him now may never solve your problem.

Just learn to love. Find one particular thing that you love most in him and start from there.

Finally, pray for God's love in your life and His guidiance towards loving him more.

best advice

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by chccho(m): 8:38pm On Dec 30, 2015

kunletoks:
On wedding day, when I see couple smiling. I wonder all what's on their mind.

U just spoke my mind, cos most times u can even tell that couples are not so sure of what they are going into on their wedding.Sometimes u can even tell fr their countenance and expressions that its not genuine love..

Just saying tho

1 Like

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Spidermon: 8:39pm On Dec 30, 2015

OP, oloshi ni e seh

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by armyofone(m): 8:44pm On Dec 30, 2015

brothers want a woman who is not open eye, do not have horns or wings..

raumdeuter:
Unless you have been dating before you travelled, its extremely foolish for anyone to go home and pick a wife when there are millions of female in the country you reside

I have little sympathy for those kain guys who travel home to import wifes they barely knew

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by ekefre4(m): 8:56pm On Dec 30, 2015

Ab025:
In case he didn't say it well, then let me say it... U are wicked and selfish#

U 4got 2 add 'VERY'

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Obcglobal(m): 9:04pm On Dec 30, 2015

Sometimes we mistook marriage as an extended boyfriend and girlfriend issues' how on earth will you marry someone you don,t love! For sure without love your marriage can,t last, be bold enough to know what is good for you and pursue it not minding who is offended, my little opinion

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Askseek(f): 9:11pm On Dec 30, 2015

daretodiffer:
That was a sarcastic response

Ok, now I get it.

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Skmoda360(m): 9:15pm On Dec 30, 2015

Ioannes:
well I hope he throws you out before you ruin his life. you don't deserve him obviously.

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by andyanders: 9:51pm On Dec 30, 2015

Fuooolish lady. For me, it will be over and no going back.

2 Likes

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by luluosas(m): 10:08pm On Dec 30, 2015

You are just a wicked soul and hell fire is your lot if you don't repent of this your wickedness.

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by stonecoldcafe: 10:11pm On Dec 30, 2015

Trendition:
Got married two years ago to a now 34year old man, and I am 26. Met him through my mum when he came into the country 3years ago, so we dated for about 9months. We got married but he had to remain in canada while I stayed back.

Truth be told, I never loved him. He's rich, okay-looking, charming and all but I just do not love him. I married him cos I kinda saw him as a clean slate, a chance to start anew cos I have lived life, done things that I am not proud of, gotten heart broken. And I just don't want kids with a man I do not love. They say u can fall in love after marriage but not here, I just admire my husband.

Hubby comes home in December and stays through to february. I kept d pills in an empty bottle of multivitamins but never thought he'ld look closely at d inscriptions on the tablets cos I had gotten away with it the past years. No one has been on my neck about getting pregnant though.

He was so angry I thought he'ld throw me out that night. He's been sleeping in d guests', doesn't eat my food, he says I am a selfish and wicked woman. I'm sooooo scared he'll call my parents, I'll just die.

Do I just walk out now and risk my parents knowing what really happend? Will I find such a gentle man again? Do I get pregnant? will I love my kids? He's such a wonderful man but I don't love him!!!

PS: I never cheated on him

Any particular reason why you guys dont stay together through out the year? Please apologise and do the needful. Learn to love him, na you marry am nah.

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by oloriadejoke(f): 10:20pm On Dec 30, 2015

U stylish wicked small oo, you should have tell him you don't love him instead of wasting his precious time. Madam you maltreat d guy no b small o

1 Like

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Nobody: 11:00pm On Dec 30, 2015

I'm sorry lady but my first reaction to your post was laughter,as in,a deep belly laugh.It looks as though you think you are in a movie with the star actress being you and supporting cast,your husband.
Madam this is real life-YOUR life,YOUR marriage.There are no do-overs in life.You don't get to practice and then do it all over again.You made the decision to marry this man,nobody forced you.Yes,you were a bit young but its done now.Does your husband beat you,does he maltreat you,is he stingy, is he selfish with his time and affection? If you can answer NO to these questions you've got a good man there.
From what you wrote I think you already admire him.Admiration can grow into love given time.And please learn to communicate with him,your deceit was hurtful and could have broken his heart.And forgive yourself for your past.Its over and done with,you are in a better place now.I wish you the best.

2 Likes

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by susanfrancis25(f): 11:53pm On Dec 30, 2015

ehnnnn. u better stay with him oooooo, start to love him now. there are many single ladies dat want to be in ur position, just pray to God to grant u d spirit to love ur husband.

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by harvesto4u: 12:28am On Dec 31, 2015

You are a very stupid woman.u got married to him because his rich.u must face your challenges

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by ogunleye557(m): 1:22am On Dec 31, 2015

Ioannes:
well I hope he throws you out before you ruin his life. you don't deserve him obviously.

end time wives....

1 Like

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by OTEGA1: 1:43am On Dec 31, 2015

coolsegun2002:
I still don't get why every one is saying it's too late...is it by force to stay in marriage...these are one of the major causes or domestic violence and murder..when pple marry for strange reasons like I'm getting old or its an opportunity I dnt wanna miss,or d guy is rich. Etc... my point is..she doesn't love d dude...she can always take a hike nd begin again...its not a good thing being someone u dnt love for crying out loud this a for ever, till death do us part transaction...how the hell do u even sleep with someone u dnt have feelings for...u be olosho??...babe waka from that relationship...uve made a mistake marrying him u don't have to live a mistake continously just cos u dnt wanna offend ur folks or u scared to start over...if u don't eventually fall in love with him..there will come a time u won't be able to stand his mere presence in the other room..and if care is not taken,u'll do something drastic just to to be free

U will be blessed for this post in 2016. Life is a mystery and love is unique, ideally she should love a man with good prospects and with canadian links,but love does not work dat way.She has tried in forcing it but i cant just be. She has made a mistake but she can choose to make ammends and move on she is still young. She may even find someone not as wealthy as he is and love him unconditionally and live a fulfilled life.The metality is to try and please families and live an unhappy life.

African nature is to try and patch, force wat cannot work even wen the person involed is crying out.It may get to a point she kill d guy just to be free.Let her move on it may be difficult but she will find who she loves and be happy.

1 Like

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by Nyceguy92: 2:25am On Dec 31, 2015

[quote author=Trendition post=41457747]One wonders how long you are going to wait before you begin to love him enough to get pregnant for him.
Your situation raises the question, between love and comfort, which is more important in marriage.
Of course, I will not marry a lady that I do not love, no matter her wealthy background.
If you still the same about your husband, maybe you should tell him and stop wasting his time.

Re: Hubby Caught Me Using Contraceptives!!! by diva90: 7:32am On Dec 31, 2015

this is a marriage.... Procreation is one of the major expectations of marriage , so yes I would advice you to have a child and play your wifely duties as expected. You already took the deep plunge by getting married to this man for silly reasons. Now you have to live with this choice that you have made. You should also consider moving to Canada so that you can bond with him And build a stronger foundation for your marriage. Who knows your admiration might just bloom into love. Good luck!

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