₦airaland Forum

Onegai:
Purity22 (I know I'm going to get my head bitten off for this...) But let me just say it: thank you for beating that girl up. If you were my sister, I'd be so proud of you. Stop worrying if the girl had died, we have a population issue in Nigeria and besides, this is NIGERIA! You'd never get convicted (I believe in diplomacy and violence: there's a time to talk, there's a time to kill. Too much reading of the Old Testament as a child caused this ).

All I could think of is the baby lying unattended to, sitting in its filth, allowed to do whatever (what if the baby had crawled towards some electronics and put live wires into his mouth? What if he had crawled somewhere and something heavy lands on him), the useless pair (his matrimonial bed, his wife's wrapper). Ignoring his child because of cheap lust! Emphasise this part to your husband: he ignored the welfare and safety of his child to gbensh.

Act strange next time you are the guy, let the wife notice something is wrong. When the girl comes in, hiss and act like a Nollywood Mother-in-law.
If the wife asks, say "oh nothing!". You'd have planted seeds in her mind and she will eventually figure it out.

cococandy:
Abi that's what I'm thinking too.
I can only tell a woman her husband is cheating if she's my blood sister. You can't trust how a friend (except you know her 100%) will react to such news. You become the bad guy for it. Especially with all those ones that will rathher blame anything or anyone else except the actual person who's hurting them.

Onegai:
Purity22 (I know I'm going to get my head bitten off for this...) But let me just say it: thank you for beating that girl up. If you were my sister, I'd be so proud of you. Stop worrying if the girl had died, we have a population issue in Nigeria and besides, this is NIGERIA! You'd never get convicted (I believe in diplomacy and violence: there's a time to talk, there's a time to kill. Too much reading of the Old Testament as a child caused this ).

All I could think of is the baby lying unattended to, sitting in its filth, allowed to do whatever (what if the baby had crawled towards some electronics and put live wires into his mouth? What if he had crawled somewhere and something heavy lands on him), the useless pair (his matrimonial bed, his wife's wrapper). Ignoring his child because of cheap lust! Emphasise this part to your husband: he ignored the welfare and safety of his child to gbensh.

Act strange next time you are the guy, let the wife notice something is wrong. When the girl comes in, hiss and act like a Nollywood Mother-in-law. If the wife asks, say "oh nothing!". You'd have planted seeds in her mind and she will eventually figure it out.

ephemm:
You are taking this whole advice thing quite too personal than I can bear, I don't comment more than once on a thread so as to allow millions of NL users the opportunity to make theirs too before the thread gets too long and boring.

Pls go back and read the modified version of my 1st comment.

I advised OP based on several assumptions:
Eg what if the wife knows her husband is randy and has been trying to save her marriage by keeping other members of the family in the dark?

Every time, what you don't know, won't hurt you.

cococandy:

byvan03:
I selectively turned a blind eye to the girl beating part, couldn't lie that I wasn't pleased .

byvan03:
My dear I can't run the risk of being the fool by telling the wife, most times it backfires. Most women know their cheating husbands/bf more than any outsider, telling her is like rubbing it on her face.

Certainly he will protect his brother if he has been unfaithful too but I will rather eer on the side of caution. I have caught a friend's husband, I only started avoiding her because we can't be friends when am hiding something you should know. She eventually caught him by herself. They made some noise, she threatened to go, a lot of begging and a brand new car followed and they lived happily ever after. Do you know how fooli*sh I would have looked blowing the whistle? Of course the man still cheats.

fem29:
At least she got a brand new car out of it

Onegai:
A story was on the FrontPage about a man who took his toddler from his estranged wife by force and the next day, reported to the Police station with the baby's dead body, that she had fallen in a well when he went to buy bread. No other explanation. What if that guy was shouting on top of another woman not his wife and his neglected toddler walked out and then the story changed to "went to buy bread" (who would leave a child unattended to buy bread?!!).

That is how easy this thread could have ended up in Punch newspapers as "child electrocuted herself when Father was asleep and Mother not at home". Then we will blame the Mother, not knowing her husband was cheating on her and neglected his child for a girl that he will not remember her name in 2 years' time.

Telling his wife is going to be hard (and i wouldn't recommend it) but drop a subtle hint that all isn't well. A man that can neglect his child to cheat is a slowpoke.

Onegai:
When the girl comes to serve water, channel your inner Patience Ozokwor.

cococandy:
You shouldn't have beat the girl. It's not your place or anyone's to.
That's the only ish I have with your story.

As for whether to tell or not, follow your conscience and use your wisdom to imagine the possible outcome. Chose the line of action that will yield the best result.

If his wife has to find out for him to change and behave himself, then so be it.
But If telling his wife will make her your enemy, then respect yourself and mind your business. Some women will turn on you rather than confront the cheating the husband. Just figure out the kind of woman she is before you ridicule yourself trying to fix another person's marital problem.

byvan03:
The hurt that comes with infidelity can't be wiped by a thousand cars, except where the man was never loved .

byvan03:
The hurt that comes with infidelity can't be wiped by a thousand cars, except where the man was never loved .

Onegai:
Well, let me speak some pidgin, "ashually, 3 brand new 2016 model card can wipe the tears away". a lot of women are married still because it is financially prudent and they need the support with the kids and "what will people say". If you ask them about hair husband's needs and his inner state of mind, they will look at you blankly. So yeah, an expensive gift works. When I was a child (like age 10!), my mum's friends always told me to make sure I got property in my name from my husband. No matter what.

Onegai:
Well, let me speak some pidgin, "ashually, 3 brand new 2016 model card can wipe the tears away". a lot of women are married still because it is financially prudent and they need the support with the kids and "what will people say". If you ask them about hair husband's needs and his inner state of mind, they will look at you blankly. So yeah, an expensive gift works. When I was a child (like age 10!), my mum's friends always told me to make sure I got property in my name from my husband. No matter what.

fem29:
Who love epp . This is a Nigerian woman married to a Nigerian man in Nigeria. I repeat she is lucky she got a brand new car and not a comment like if you don't like it then pack out.

Neverquit:
Guys, biko, remove the thoughts of cheating from your mind. It is very disrespectful. And yes, some women have mastered the act of cheating that you will never have an inclination talk less of catching them.

Onegai:
How high are the chances that the apprentice the OP's brother was sleeping with is a member of her church choir or teaches in children's church and has a steady boyfriend

EfemenaXY:
Why was he begging you to keep his dirty secret? He was brave enough to dip his dîck in a public toilet (on his matrimonial bed oh! With the tart using his wife's personal clothing. Ayama!) So the idiöt should man up and face the consequences.

Nothing done in secret stays hidden forever. Don't worry, I doubt his wife would leave him over this but she does have a right to know about his indescretions. For all you know, he probably had unprotected sex with the girl, thereby exposing his wife to a host of STDs.

AIDS is real.

Yomieluv:
you should be lucky the young girl didnt fight back,in the process of forming James bond,got the beating of your life.

why fight,when theres an option of dialogue..

you did wrong fighting.

purity22:
Thank God she didn't fight back but had it been she did fight back i am very sure this matter would have been so bad by now. And i know that other married women staying in the same compond would join me. I dragd her to my house to avoid crowd. Anyways am not even proud of my action but i pray it send a massage to her brain

Evina:
Bros.

She did not fight. She only did the needful; gave the girl the beating of a lifetime!

Yomieluv:
she has no right to beat the lady. is she the lady's boss?