₦airaland Forum

I saw myself sitting in the midst of three girls (corpers) and two guys in a fast food galleria. Initially we were having a healthy conversation at random. From politics (Buhari, Lai Mohammed, Saraki and co) to music (Tiwa Savage and the Cocaine man) to Football to even marriage.

Marriage: Next thing the girls said never will they think of dating/marrying a poor or jobless man. Never!!! Even if he's uglier than a baboon as long as the money is there. I and my niggas started feeling uncomfortable. The bluntness and the protracted emphasis on wealth could send cold shivers down the spine. I could sense that three of us started thinking about our bank accounts 'cos there was a little moment of silence. They kept muttering gibberish, calling names like Otedola', Ayiri, Ifeanyi Uba. Houses they have seen, swimming pools in their guys' house in Abuja etc. "They wan fall our hanz but God no dey sleep"

My phone rang, it was my secretary. I excused myself. She said one of our clients just brought N150k cash for some materials she supplied in the morning. "Better, bring the money to so so so place" then I planned something with her.

Thirty minutes later, the gold diggers were still giving us "big big talks". Secretary walks in, greets everybody and hands over N150k to me. Somehow I carefully swerve the money in front of the girls and then says to my Secretary "oh N150k is too small for me to groove Owerri this night na. Today is Ladies' night" My friends coding the prank says "No na chicken change"

Secretary: Sir, manage it, is it not just for a night. Look for a cheap hotel of like 50k.
My friends: (shouts) God forbid. A whole LOKITO? Go back and get his ATM card ojere.

Like magic these girls started talking to me like a Boss. No name wey dem no call me. Chair, boss, Oga etc. my friends come be like house boys. Hehehehe. Funny enough I made sure that Five Naira didn't go out from that N150k.

Na big-big talk we use end that day even their drinks they paid with their own money.

Lol...as if u really have a secretary

KashyBaby:
Lol...as if u really have a secretary

Lol I'm not extending the Big-Big talks to Nairaland o. Na there e end

Na new thing?

So so funny, why didn't you pay for their drink nah, abi u b acagon ni?

Money, money and success is good. We all love to associate with it so nothing new. But it was hilarious sha.