jusRadical:




All glory to GOD. I like the old school. It was good enough for saint Paul, saint Peter, saint John, etc.

My utmost desire is to be like JESUS CHRIST, to be dead to sin and self but alive to and in CHRIST JESUS. Even if I am poor and sick, let Him be glorified in my life.

Remain blessed.

And you too bro

OmoBety:
First of all, you guys can say whatever you want about the lady because you were not in the house with her. You won't understand her pain. But I do. We ladies are emotional beings not logical beings like the men. No woman in her right sense will marry a man n want to leave her marriage just 2 months into it. She must have been hurt seriously for her to have taken such a decision to leave the home. But it's frustrating to live with a man who doesn't understand you and who isn't trying to make the marriage better. Marriage is work my Dear.

Communication is always key.
You can't communicate with him?
Invite his close friends
Not possible?
Tell your mom?
Not possible?
Tell his mom?
Not possible?
Tell his dad?
Not possible? still wouldn't listen?
He would respect his pastor or imam,tell them
Not possible?
Then you can now take your options.

How can she be discussing her private life with her neighbours that she just met less than 3 months?
I just don't understand this!!!!

snakie86:
They dated for over one and half years. The friend has been the one picking the wife's phone since on Monday whenever the line was available.

The friend is married too but the husband told me yesterday that a friend to the lady's husband has told him before that he should warn his wife not to be discussing their marriage with the friend. It led to argument between them with the wife maintaining that she doesn't discuss anything with her friend.

The wife is not a full house wife, she works in a flexible environment and she do come home way early before the husband

The female friend who kept picking the calls should be the one responsible for the lady getting out of the house. It could be that she is a bi-sexual and her female partner wants her to get out from her matrimonial home.

I have had an experience where I dated a lady and I never knew was a bi-sexual in Atlanta, Georgia.I had a party and the lady came and never wanted any other person to dance with her. She only wanted to dance alone with my lady and anytime I get to wanna have a dance with my lady, she gets jealous and moody. She later went and sat down somewhere and I started suspecting her moves. I called my lady to the room and asked her to tell me what was in-between them and she confessed to me and told me that she was confused and don't know how to get out herself out from the lady.

I just want to let you know that it could be that she is in-between hence her action and complaint.

Timbuktou:

Most likely.

oloriburuku ni awon ebi eee..omo ale jati jati

Timbuktou:

Most likely.

oloriburuku ni awon ebi eee..omo ale jati jati

Timbuktou:

Most likely.

oloriburuku ni awon ebi eee..omo ale jati jati

Following

jusRadical:



I beg to differ.

It is not about courting very well. It is about honesty, truthfullness, straightforwardness, and being real.

My parents neither courted nor knew each before the day of introduction.

GBAM. KISSES DEAR

Oga you better face your own marriage and leave them to sort out their problems. They both have parents and siblings.

The 1st mistake that lady did was comparing her marriage to yours. There should always be boundaries between you and your neighbor to avoid unnecessary problems very soon now the blame will somehow shift to you and your wife. No be you marry them or hook them up just mind your business and face your marriage.

Life

BellaElla:
Oga morning o. In my opinion I believe you are too involved in their marriage. Firstly it is only an irresponsible wife that visits neighbours everyday without reason. You and ur wife shouldn't have let it get that frequent. Its not a behaviour to encouraged and breeds over familiarity and disrespect. Another thing is when she started complaining about her marriage to u people, you should have known the kind of woman she was. That woman can set u up, she can cause issues between u and ur wife . She is not a wise person to associate with. However its not late to disassociate urself. Distance urself from their issues. Stop calling the woman. E no concern u. Let the man and his family sort it out. It would surprise u that when they are talking about their wahala or name would be mentioned. Over familiarity between neighbours dey always bring insult.

The best post on this topic!!!! If I were the OP, I would have given her red card from my house, the very day she ignored her husband arrival and opted to stay back in my house.

There are few, but fundamental things every lady should know, in order to have a successful marriage; 1. Contentment. 2. Respect. 3. Privacy (don't discuss your marriage with friends, that way, you don't compare marriages. 4. Partnership (make conscious effort to help build the kind of marriage you want with your partner).

That lady in the story lacked all these.

BellaElla:
Oga morning o. In my opinion I believe you are too involved in their marriage. Firstly it is only an irresponsible wife that visits neighbours everyday without reason. You and ur wife shouldn't have let it get that frequent. Its not a behaviour to encouraged and breeds over familiarity and disrespect. Another thing is when she started complaining about her marriage to u people, you should have known the kind of woman she was. That woman can set u up, she can cause issues between u and ur wife . She is not a wise person to associate with. However its not late to disassociate urself. Distance urself from their issues. Stop calling the woman. E no concern u. Let the man and his family sort it out. It would surprise u that when they are talking about their wahala or name would be mentioned. Over familiarity between neighbours dey always bring insult.

God bless.you...I guess you are married right ? It's only an unwise fellow that visits Neigbour all the time and this truly brings rubbishes into homes ...I can fight any woman for such .... You have said it all ....but now that they are involve then they have to help in one way or another.....after salvation of soul,marriage is the most difficult issue on earth ,it either leads to heaven or the other one

Mariojane:
. Is the wife a benin girl? If yes, he should be thankful she left now than later after she must have destroyed everything good thing in the man life. Am sorry if there re benin girls in the forum but that seems to be like their nature. About 95% of them. Even their mothers. They find joy in making men miserable nd having the last laugh if they re lucky the man died on time. You ask the guy how long they ve been courting? That doesn't assured of a happy home. Y don't you start by asking the guy about the girl's family. What kind of family she is from?the first impression he got the very first time he visits them? How is the girl relationship with everyone in her family? If no member of your family support your unruly behavior you won't dare it. There re little details guys re supposed to take serious in a girl but they never did. Most guys especially Nairalander has the impression that all a lady want is money which is very wrong. We need money, Time,love,attention,care etc but you people conclude only is what we need. He should be happy she didn't cheat on him atleast it shows she respect him. .

Don't contaminate this thread with tribalism. The state of origin of this girl did not play a part in what she did. I am yet to see a pattern of broken marriages peculiar to any tribe or nigerian culture.

You said 95% of them? I schooled in Benin and lived in South South. Apart from the high incidence of single mothers owning property which is attributed to italy business there is no pattern of broken homes unique to benin. In fact, from discussions there seems to be a strong correlation with young age and educational background with these sort of marriage issues


The moment we learn to analyse issues properly the better for us. There are people trying to learn a thing or two from comments here. Do not start spraying wrong information. I am having this domineering issue with my gf. She is not benin and I am not benin either. After reading this thread I have had to call her and begun putting some questions out in the open in my relationship and am sure many others might be doing the same.

Please try and be modest in your opinions to allow others learn

Thank you

God help them

ay4shizzy:
oloriburuku ni awon ebi eee..omo ale jati jati

Kilode? Ewo ni t'epe. Otito koro.

You might not want to hear it, but marrying a yoruba woman is one of the riskiest things any man can do. Even if this story is untrue, it doesn't erase facts, statstics and realities. You should be more concerned about reversing this trend than sticking up for your tribe.

By the way, I'm yoruba. Now go and... I'm sure you know what to do.

Marriage nowadays are just taken like a child's play.. i wonder what some pple do during courtship.cases of marriage palaver here n there.Abeg.. i don tire..#Understanding lo matter.

snakie86:
I will keep updating as event unfold and trying to see if we can find a solution to this problem. Two months is just too soon to give up on your marriage and i believed moving out of the house was not a day or week plan by the wife

My question to you is, why are you so interested in someone else's marriage? Seems to me like your's is not very interesting so both of you enjoy the drama of others. What will you do if and when they move out. Find another leech to suck the drama off?

Debolly u need to read this

Hmmm

Op, stopcalling her. Just send her a long text chronicling what you want to advise her on. After that, drop off the scene, you have done your bit. It might just be that her exit is blessing in disguise. When my elder bro married and my dad was having a convo with him and the wife, i recall him telling them that a good wife brings blessings to the family and i have seen this in their life, but where a lady wants out, let her go. You can't force iron and clay to gum together. When the clay shrinks, it will invariably fall off on its own, so why even try

Timbuktou:




Kilode? Ewo ni t'epe. Otito koro.

You might not want to hear it, but marrying a yoruba woman is one of the riskiest things any man can do. Even if this story is untrue, it doesn't erase facts, statstics and realities. You should be more concerned about reversing this trend than sticking up for your tribe.

By the way, I'm yoruba. Now go and... I'm sure you know what to do.

grow up..tribe has nothing to do with dis..the kardashians i guess their ancestors are yorubas.

BellaElla:
Oga morning o. In my opinion I believe you are too involved in their marriage. Firstly it is only an irresponsible wife that visits neighbours everyday without reason. You and ur wife shouldn't have let it get that frequent. Its not a behaviour to encouraged and breeds over familiarity and disrespect. Another thing is when she started complaining about her marriage to u people, you should have known the kind of woman she was. That woman can set u up, she can cause issues between u and ur wife . She is not a wise person to associate with. However its not late to disassociate urself. Distance urself from their issues. Stop calling the woman. E no concern u. Let the man and his family sort it out. It would surprise u that when they are talking about their wahala or name would be mentioned. Over familiarity between neighbours dey always bring insult.

My love I beg to differ! what happened to being your brother's keeper? what happened to looking out for the well fare of each other? The world become bad since everyone started minding their business.

There is nothing bad in him trying to help his neighbour locate d whereabout of her runaway wife. Albeit in a wise way. Even if they reconcile tomorrow and decides to take him for an enemy or mention him badly in their case that one remains their business but shouldn't in anyway discourage him from lending help where needed.

Being your brother's keeper dosnt make you an interferer.

BellaElla:
Oga morning o. In my opinion I believe you are too involved in their marriage. Firstly it is only an irresponsible wife that visits neighbours everyday without reason. You and ur wife shouldn't have let it get that frequent. Its not a behaviour to encouraged and breeds over familiarity and disrespect. Another thing is when she started complaining about her marriage to u people, you should have known the kind of woman she was. That woman can set u up, she can cause issues between u and ur wife . She is not a wise person to associate with. However its not late to disassociate urself. Distance urself from their issues. Stop calling the woman. E no concern u. Let the man and his family sort it out. It would surprise u that when they are talking about their wahala or name would be mentioned. Over familiarity between neighbours dey always bring insult.

Well said. The aspect of having her always in their apartment is wrong. Also the op trying to impress the the woman by helping his wife out on domestic duties while the lady is watching is another problem hence her complaint as to her husband not coming close.

The lady is a full time housewife of which which she has nothing doing while her husband is out working and coming back home late of which must have been reasons for not having time in helping the wife out.

Op, you should stay clear from this problem and allow them resolve their problems.

bighorlus:
It's a sensitive issue and I know the problems could be from any of the couple but since you said there wasnt an argument or fight before she left means the decision to leave wasnt made in a hurry. some girls are not cut out for marriage and the challenges it brings but then again you never know what went wrong between the two. i'll give you a situation in a marriage i knew that lasted about 3 months.
This guy was my female cousins very good friend, his demeanor was such that you could tell immediately he is gay. i told the ones that cared to listen, but they said no he had a girlfriend, he talks about sex a lot bla bla bla. My cousin said no he only behaves live a girl etc
Fast forward to when i learnt he was getting married . WHAT? was all i could say when i saw his bride , beautiful, sexy, fantastic body. Infact my spec and im wondering how she ended up with this dude, but then who am i to judge the power of love. they had their first dance as a couple the dude's ass shaked more than the wife rotating and winding like those girls in a fuji music video. i kept wondering who was going to dig who this night?
Fast forward again to 3months. the wife had packed out of the house and was livng overseas to avoid embarrasments.
The story is they didnt have sex on their honey moon he claimed he was tired. they finally managed to have some sloppy sex after some weeks of pressure from the wife. the guy clearly wasnt into females and dosen't get hard , the wife was so sex starved that she had to leave the marriage .
My point is there is so much that could be wrong in any marriage and you wouldnt know unless the couples really say it out. she probably hasnt said it all and he probably hasnt done same. but one thing these marriages always have in common is A WRONG FOUNDATION

True! Somethings eyes see,mouth cannot talk..

nmreports:
The three most difficult things in life now are:

1) Being successful.
2) Living a holy life.
3) Finding a good woman.

ALL VERY HARD.

He should count his losses because even if she comes back it can remain the same again.

A good man will always find a good woman...bt in most cases good men take the good woman in their life for granted thereby losing them to anoda man which leads them to this type of story

Vikky014:
A good man will always find a good woman...bt in most cases good men take the good woman in their life for granted thereby losing them to anoda man which leads them to this type of story

Noted!

See Gobe

They say marriage is for better for Worse....No third party should interfere in marriages. They can sort themselves out. D big question is "was d wife ready for marry"? Why because of little things she packed her things out of the house? She should also know that there is nothing like perfect marriage. She must not compare her marriage with others because she does not know what others are passing through inwardly/internally. I repeat there is no perfect marriage. But her friend.....?

1) Change the locks
2) Annul the marriage legally
3) Live life.

This kind of woman can kill her husband.

op, I feel it is only lack of sex that will make a woman to move out just two months after wedding. please ask oga questions

This your story has k-leg, how can the parent says they don't knw her whereabout of a full grow lady? Legal marriage for that matter, its not only husband and wife again but families to families. Also you said her parent claimed they don't know her whereabout yet they allow him to go without puting presure on husband, no parent, i repeat no parent wil do dat just afta 2 months of mariage

ay4shizzy:
grow up..tribe has nothing to do with dis..the kardashians i guess their ancestors are yorubas.

You grow up. Who would you be more suspicious of commit a jihad-inspired terrorist attack? An Arab or a caucasian? Does that mean all Arabs are terrorists or that there are no European supporters of the islamic jihad or even ISIS in particular..

Wake the fvck up Joseph. This isn't dreamland. There are sentiments and there are facts. Face facts and stop wailing like an orphaned puppy.