Madam I feel sorry for you.. but something tells me you know your husband is right,, I also lost a girl friend due to my atheist views,, the Bible says you shall know the truth and it shall set you free.. stay with you husband and beg him to tune it down if he loves you..

Look at yourself @Op ur husband tolerated u with ur believe now its do difficult for u to show him same courtesy if you truly believe in ur God then pray for ur hubby, religion is our problem in this part of the world, I can remembered a story of one young boy branded a witch by some xtian folks but the boy was saved by one Belgian or German woman with tattoo all over her body I strongly believe that woman has no religion but she did something that should make those xtian to ask themselves questions, my point is that being religious doesn't makes u a better person but ur actions do, ur hubby is an atheist leave him be if its God's wish he will reach out to him instead of u worrying about ur Pastor, friends n family"s feelings about him lets learn how to tolerate each other s believe

plaetton:
Madam, this is exactly the problems we athiest have with religion.You have a loving husband whom you have loved and admired all this while and who has also loved you uncoditionally despite your religiousity.Now you are just beginning to feel uncomfortable about his athiesm. Why? Because of what others (religious folks ) are insinuating? Why is so hard to tolerate people who do not share your religious beliefs? Would you have prefered to be married to the so-called born again religous pretenders who outwardly profess regiousity but whose hearts are dark pits, than to a non-petensious reality-oriented man whose heart and mind is transparent to you at all times?

Have you reckoned that the problem might be with you and the increase in your religious zeal? Are you surprised that your pastor does not like him? How do u expect a pastor to like someone whom he cannot manipulate and sap? You are exhibiting the typical symptoms. Soon they will start seeing visions and prophesies about how your husband is evil and is going to do this or that to you and your children.
There is nothing in this world that divides people more than religion. Religion can destory your home if you allow it to do so.Your home should be your church. The love of your husband and children should be your sanctuary.
I guarantee that You cannot find in a church, what you cannot find in your home-namely love,sincerity,respect and peace.

I am an athiest who is married to a born again wife. I made my position know from the start and we have lived happily. I go to church with her from time to time. But I have grown waery of the "name it and claim it" theology of the pentecostal preachers,so I do not go anymore. I put my foot down on no night vigils, retreats,house fellowships, and midweek service. Otherwise, I try not to interfere. I find that is her church members who always want to make our religious difference an issue. I always put them in their right place.
As for my children, I have already succeeded in planting seeds of doubts in thier young minds, which for me ,is sufficient enough to help them develope the healthy skeptism necessary to intelligently discern life and reality, hopefully, from both a philosophycal and scientific perspectives rather than from religious perspective.

I do not see any problems in you family except the one that your religious peers are pressuring you to create.
Take note that the increase in your religious zeal is and will be directly proportional to the level of tension,resentment and ultimately, distrust in your household. I hope you make wise decisions.

Well written! I'm not an atheist, but also not a christian, prob a theist. Yet, u wrote it all, respect each others religion. But d kids should be allowed to form their beliefs, don't purposely influence them. Some pple actually need a religion to withstand d onslaught of life, respect them.

Op, enjoy ur marriage. Chill abt his stance, just plead with him to tone it down. Don't alienate him for pple who won't give u joy, they can also end up ostracizing u. U av to realise, he his also accommodating u n ur religion, inspite of his beliefs.

@yolany

What I deduce from your story is that your husband is a sincere man. To be sincere, it takes a fraudulent individual to practice Christianity in nigeria for straight 20yrs with a strong zeal. Why your hubby has become outspoken is because he has seen that a lot of people who claim to be christians are atheist like himself. The number of atheist have risen in recent years due to the numbers of fake preachers everywhere who ventured into christianity because of unemployment. Even many pastors these days don't believe what they preach. Atheist are everywhere just that majority are just pretending to be christians. Some are even pastors. I would have explained my reason for these conclusions but typing with the phone is hard work.

yolandy:
I have been around here for a while. I just created this new id to relate my problems here.

My husband of over 6 years has now become an outspoken atheist. He has been one all along but he has been keeping it on the low. He opened up to me and told me 3 years after we got married. I was shocked but there was nothing I could do. He wasn't really a religious person before we got married and I wasn't as well(I was much more religious than him even at that time). I began to take my religion very seriously after we got married. Now I have an amazing relatioship with God. I take it very seriously, and I put God first in my life. My husband does not. He doesn't rub his atheism on my face, we don't talk about religion, even when we do, it is always me that brings it up but, he sometimes listens and sometimes dismiss what I am saying with a wave of hand or with a laugh. He is a very good man and an excellent husband, he takes very good care of me and my 2 kids, he loves us to death, and does his duty as a father and a husband excellently. I can't wish for a better man.

He is not the type to engage in and argument over religion because he is very smart and always wins. I have seen 3 people engage him and they ended up losing the argument to him. He is widely read and cleaver so I can't even go into an argument with him. His mind is already made up. The problem I have right now is that he is becoming outspoken about his unbelief, back in the days he just keeps it to himself, these days I see him openly mocking and deriding pastors, believers, and anything that has to do with religion and I am not comfortable with that. Last week his elder brother had a heart attack(we live in the same estate), while his brother's wife and family were praying for him, my husband who is a doctor came and told them to shut up and allow him do what he can, he said instead of wasting their time praying to an imaginary God they should go and get the car ready to take him to the hospital because taking him to the hospital is what will save his life not some empty prayers to an imaginary God. Every body was shocked. His actions like these get me very worried. He is now very open about his unbelief and uses it to mock people that come to talk to him about God or religion. Most people I know now dislike him greatly for his unbelief. Rumors are circulating that he is in a secret cult. My pastor and friends in church don't like him. His family dislike him as well but they can't confront him. People now see me as "the wife of that devil" and I am not comfortable with it at all.

Some days ago I over heard him suggesting to my 6 years old son that the stories in the Bible are mere stories. It started when my son asked him why he doesn't pray together with us. I confronted him and he said he just wanted the boy to know how he feels about the Bible. He then said he will wait for our kids to grow up some more before letting them know his position. But I fear with his present outspoken attitude, he will try to poison their young minds and tell them that all the stories inside the Bible are all lies the way he tells any body that comes his way to either preach to him or engage him in any discussion about religion. We aren't having any problems now but I fear that his increasing outspokenness about his atheism will bring problems in our marriage sooner or later. I just hope he will keep quite and keep everything to himself they way he used to before but he won't. I have talked to him but he won't listen. He doesn't go about telling people that they should become atheist like him, but the way he goes about mocking religion and believers when ever the topic comes up is driving me mad. I really fear for our kids. What if something happens to me? I know my kids will become atheist like him, because he will poison their minds. What do I do now? I am really confused. I need advice from matured minds here. Please this should not be taken to the front page. I just want to read the contributions of the matured minds in here. Thank you

Somewhere in your heart, you knew he had the potentials to be that way. He was not a christain and you were never deceived into this marriage. My only advise is to let him be and continue to pray for the salvation of his soul. Talk to your God to work on him, it may take a while and probably may never happen but what do you stand to lose if you continue to pray for him. Goodluck.

GboyegaD:
@OP,
Recall the word of the Lord says "The Heart of the King is in His Hands and like a River of Water He directs it to wherever He wills". Start committing his heart into the hands of God that God himself should minister to him and I know God will surely do this for you.

pls just keep quiet if you dont have anything reasonable to say.

You people are misunderstanding this OP. Shes comfortable with the man as an atheist. Hes a good husband. Her major problem is that the man has now started disrespecting her religion, which is absolutely irresponsible of him.
If she can tolerate and respect his views, then he should also respect hers.
In fact, the man is in the wrong, why did he not let her know he was an atheist before marrying her? Why the deception? Why being obnoxious and disrespecting her religion now?
OP please have a heart to heart talk with your husband and tell him how you feel, I think both of you can reach middle ground and respect each other's views

ronkebp:
I really don't know where the ''intelligence'' lies, when you cannot intelligently prove to me or others that there is no GOD. only when that has been proven, then i can hit my chest and say ''An Atheist is an intelligent man or woman''.

Can you honestly say your god exist ?
I mean have you felt and experienced his presence and works ?

Atheist intelligence is like a child trying to outshine his master. They are like babies in the realm of things in this world. You cannot beat them in any argument because the odds are against you in the first place, with their misinterpretation of everything the bible holds. you cannot attack them either, because they will use it against you. They are better left alone.

Illogical nonsense. Does a coin have only one side?
If you think the bible theory of heaven is wrong that means you must know an alternative that proves it to be wrong no? 1+1 does not equal 3 BECAUSE we already know that it is equal to 2 no?
you cant just claim the idea that God created the heaven is false just because you think so... is that your idea of an above-average IQ? Poor, try again.

I dont believe the tooth fairy exists BECAUSE i know an alternative - God!

Next?

NB: if you dont give a rats butt about my beliefs then why do you troll the religion pages screaming urself hoarse about a lot of things you have a very porous understanding about?

STOP making a fool of youself sir, the book Biible you are reading is an old book this is 2016.. infact do a research on the Bible,, when was the first copy printed?? and so on.. Stop trying hard to suppress the truth about God and religion... Am a physicist we study the nature of matter.. All religion explanation of the workings of the earth and universe doesn't hold water... religion is lies ..

counsellorwiser:


Boy, bow your head and say amen..

dont get me wrong now when i say bible stories are not real, i mean they are not literally real. no whale ate a man for 3 days and spat him out. they are symbolic and allegory. they are real but just not literally real. thats all am saying. no woman was talking to a literal snake. snakes dont have conversations with humans lolzzz

Hello Ma.....

If u are truly born again all you need do is go on your kneels and keep praying for your husband and your children. Tell God to surround ur kids with his presence. Ask God for mercy on behalf of ur husband and authoritatively dismiss the hikd of d enemy over his life, and that God would shine his light into his heart.

Please let the love of God begin to find expression in your life. For faith worketh by Love. Pray that the Holy Spirit will teach u and direct u. If u will lean on d Spirit of God u will soon testify.

Never give d enemy a chance.

harakiri:
@Yolandy



Okay. . .




Is there a problem with that? You make it sound like he's become gay overnight. Are Theists (religious folks like yourself) not outspoken about their belief in religion? Why can't he be outspoken about his disbelief in religion? Hmmm?



All you've said so far points to the fact that you have a husband most women out there would kill for. Tell me. . .which do you prefer? A man who goes to church almost every day of the week, prays fervently morning and night and yet, he still cheats on you OR a man who is very open with you, does his duties as a man and has proved beyond every reasonable doubt that he loves you and the kids and is here for keeps? I still don't get it. How does being religious transform into being a "good person"? Everything you've said about your husband defines him as a good person but it seems you're looking for something to complain about (like all women do) and now, it's his disbelief in religion. Can you honestly look inward and tell yourself that your husband isn't a much better and morally upright man than all those hypocrites in your church who will carry 20kg bibles,sing aloud to the lawd,pay all the offerings and tithes,speak in tongues and after closing hour, they will head off to the hotel where their mistresses are lodged?



I don't mean to blow the trumpet but i am yet to see ONE atheist whose IQ isn't above average. Most (if not all) Atheists are intelligent folks. A lot of us (especially those of us born into deeply religious backgrounds) dumped religion after a lot of brain storming,background research,inconsistencies in biblical tales and the total irreconcilable patterns of religion (Christianity in this case) of this age with what's depicted in the bible. There are others however who were born into non-religious households (e.g Europeans) and therefore the concept of any religion would be completely absurd to them (it's like telling them the tooth fairy exists! ! !).



I can understand how you feel about the situation. There are also times when i lose it and go ballistic like your husband is doing right now ESPECIALLY when i'm constantly hen pecked by religious folks who don't even know their bibles half as i do. It's irritating. Imagine how irritated you would be if a Buddhist/Taoist was desperately trying to convert you to their religion (annoying right?). Now imagine how A NON-RELIGIOUS PERSON who doesn't give a damn about any supernatural beliefs would feel! ! ! Put yourself in his shoes for 5mins.




There's a saying :

HUMAN BEINGS FEAR WHAT THEY DO NOT UNDERSTAND AND HATE WHAT THEY CANNOT CONQUER! They dislike him because. . .? What? He refuses to be a gullible religious vegetable? What? Now they say he's in a cult (Wow! And i thought i was the only one who has been unfortunate enough to have Nigerian-home-video-religious-zombies peddle false rumors to taint my image). Your pastor and friends don't like him? So what? Must he buckle under all because YOU WANT him to please you,your friends and Oga Pastor? A lot of the people whose opinion you consider so highly don't even have half the happiness you have in your marriage. Some of the women gossiping to you probably have other rivals "outside" who their husbands have impregnated. Dey there dey listen to outside ppl you hia? Your eyes go soon clear.



YES! They are all stories and your husband doesn't want his children growing up believing lies and made up nomadic goat herder stories from the medieval age.



You "CONFRONTED" him? Don't the kids belong to him as well? Oh. . .So you are the lord of the house abi? Is that what the bible stipulates?



So telling them the truth is now tantamount to poisoning. Wonderful! The bible says the world is flat and four cornered. With all the education you've recieved, can you honestly say this is true? The bible says a virgin can get pregnant without having $ex? If you hear such a story today, would you believe it? The bible says a man can live in the belly of a fish/whale for 3 days without air,food or water. . .and you believe that right? The bible says 5,000 people can be fed with only 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish and you believe it (something me and my younger brother can consume). The bible says a man parted the red sea with his bare hands and you believe. The bible says a man dead for 3 days (with his intestines removed according to the custom) can be resurrected and you believe all that. The bible says donkeys can talk (remember the story of Balaam?). The bible says does "shall not kill" and yet in that same bible, the biblical god ordered "his people" to attack/invade foriegn lands,kill,burn and plunder the cities to the ground. In today's day and age, these are crimes tantamount to assault,murder,genocide,rape,battert,arson and armed robbery. It's all there in the bible but you people pretend not to see it. You believe all these stories because you were taught to believe them from childhood. You believe all these stories because the white man brought the bible and anything from "obodo-oyibo" is genuine. Funny thing is, these same white folks don't even take Christianity as serious as we do. Nigeria is officially the most religious country in the world and yet so much wickedness and strife pervades the land. What does that tell you? Hmmm?

The bible says Jesus came,died and all things are passed away. If that's the case, why do the so called "Men of fraud Gawd" revert to Malachi 3:10 when coaxing the congregation to give more tithes and offerings? Why do they select the juicy/profitable parts of the bible and leave the "nasty" parts e.g the eye for an eye laws? Hmmm? Tongue tied?

From the book of Matthew to Revelation, can you quote ONE single passage where Jesus asked for tithes or offerings after preaching to the congregation? Hmmm? A lot of "Pastors" tell lies about Jesus and his disciples/apostles being rich men. Is that so? Jesus is depicted as wandering on foot throughtout samaria,nazareth,bethlehem and Jerusalem and he was constantly on the run from his enemies (the pharisees). Does this depict the life of a rich man? Hmmm? Paul and Silas were so dead broke that they couldn't afford to give alms to the begging cripple. What does that tell you? Hmmm? Can you compare this with the flamboyant lifestyles of the so called "men of god" you see around you? It's a no-brainer Oyedepo can afford FOUR private jets.

I can go on and on. . .but you get the picture. Remain religious if you want to but if you think you can impose your delusions on your husband, then you are asking for problems. It's like asking him to believe Santa Claus is real all because Christmas is real.

Use your head woman and quit look for problems that don't exist (unless you are ready to break your home).

End of!

wow! you know a lot of awesome rubbish about religion..

just because your "then pastor" wasn't a competent and truth "pastor" ...of who you expected to be and live like "Jesus", disappointed you, doesn't mean you're ryt.. trace your root sir..


you think by going on so many research you have the perfect knowledge of knowing that the bible stories are false?

gimme the veracity of your claim and I'll show you the truism in mine as well ..


you are quite intelligent ..no doubt...

and what you said about the IQ of atheist is evident.
but then again...you all have worldly wisdom..


now upon all your research and " acquired" knowledge, ever wondered why mans knowledge isn't capable enof to create a living thing? or a living soul?

think about it ....

all we have made so far are inanimate..
prove me wrong.

atheist has never won any argument with genuine and straight forward religious men..(Christians in particular) ...the wise men just kept quiet and wonder the level of their foolishness...hence making them think they are wise and have won..

think about it bro...there are some things you can give a concrete fact about how when where what which, they occur or appear..

I know also...not all the stories in the bible that we can also, in this present time, tell the truism of...

that's why we follow it with FAITh...the basics of Christianity... and hence appear foolish to the world..

BUT ONE DAY, OUR BLESSED HOPE SHALL APPEAR.....and I pray we all make it.

I would have been an atheist if I hadn't seen the true picture of Islam. I'm a Muslim who live by the Qur'an alone, no hadith attached, and I have every prove in the holy Qur'an that God exists.

I've researched into different religions from Judaism, Taoism, Confucianism, Christianity, Buddhism, Hinduism, Islam, Shinto and even the democratic Atheism I love so much. I ended up choosing Islam, the Islam that recognises the holy Qur'an alone as the only source of Islamic knowledge and laws.

Anything outside the Qur'an is not Islamic to me, I've been faced with critics on my new chosen faith by my brothers and friends just like the OP's husband because I claim I was born into the wrong Islam, which is my honest truth.

Only few people know that Hadith is the only book that has tarnished the image of Islam so bad that Islam is tagged the most famous and callous religion.

If you're an atheist or a non Muslim or even a Hadith type of Muslim that thinks you can prove me wrong, I'm open to learning and switching faith and belief.

Back to the OP, I'll advice you to leave your husband to his view of religion, if hell is real as you might believe, he'll be the one to go there and not you. Same thing applies to your kids if they follow him or not. Practice your faith if you feel is right for you and let your husband do what he feels is right for him. There's no compulsion in religion from Islamic point of view.

I hate it when I'm told not to follow my instinct and instead follow what is being thought by humans who I believe are not as intelligent as myself. It's a free world biko.

There is no greater threat than cohabiting with an unbeliever ...Pray for him if you love God will witness to him one sweet day encourage your children.

Yesterday my mum called me to wake me up for church I was hesitant but something in me gave last min and i went and I was blessed with the Word. Later my life could have fallen apart but for the word i heard.

The word grounds us so I'm sorry but your husband won't have a moral grounding his sense of reasoning will always be about his feelings that's why he said what he said about the brother

Forgive me Atheists but the one may thing that really intrigues me is the high level of intolerance and insensitivity

Check his friends and pray for them too Prayer works

if your Christian faith is growing his atheism should be growing as well...
well my advice, pray for him secretly and stop convincing him your prayers will convince him...

2012 and now 2016... Mods must be high on something. The OP begged you not to take this to frontpage but una no dey ever hear word

Back to the topic:
... Will be back for modification.

MizTyna:


You beat me to it. She's just dreaming up issues. He is a good man,caring,loving,great husband and father. Let her see what bible thumping guys are up to in my inbox. We need to apply sense here. The guy does not even stop her from going to church. Atheists are never the problem,it is the so called 'christians' who feel the need to defend their God and shove their beliefs down our throats!

The problem is not atheism or christianity. The problem is intolerant humans who are condescending in their attitude and try to force their beliefs on everyone.

I'm a non-believer myself. I think the man is not in the wrong, but he should be more tactful. You can let people know you're atheist without being rude or arrogant or condescending to them. The wife also needs to realize that eventually the kids will make their own decisions. She can't be solely responsible for them to be strong christians all their lives.

KEMET but fr theres beginnimg to be proof that the biblical stories heard are based on egyptian characters .im a Christian but daily i find myself doubting more n more.....but i try to reinforce my belief

@yolandy, with due respect... You and ur husband, who spends more time with the kids? If your children become atheist, you fail as a mother.

@ yolandy, with due respect... You and ur husband, who spends more time with the kids? If your children become atheist, you fail as a mother.

@ yolandy, with due respect... You and ur husband, who spends more time with the kids? If your children become atheist, you fail as a mother... Ask ur husband what's his perception after life. I wish I can meet him in person so we can argue wella

two words for you ma.

War Room

go and watch that movie and most importantly, apply the lessons from it