nowpresence:
Download these books and read them. You must not necessarily do what they say.
Eat, love and pray and
the secret.
I hope you get better.

Do you mean ''Eat, love and prey''? The vampire book?

Ranchhoddas:
Do you mean ''Eat, love and prey''? The vampire book?

It is eat love and pray. And no it's not a vampire book. It's about a woman who after getting what she wanted still felt empty, lonely and depressed. So she set on a journey of self discovery.
The book talks about love(self love) , inner peace, spirituality etc. This is exactly what the op needs.

nowpresence:


It is eat love and pray. And no it's not a vampire book. It's about a woman who after getting what she wanted still felt empty, lonely and depressed. So she set on a journey of self discovery.
The book talks about love(self love) , inner peace, spirituality etc. This is exactly what the op needs.

Okay.

I appreciate everyone who have taken their time to comment .

I got question for u op and i want you to answer me honestly

<<<< have you tried making male friends before..when i mean friends, i am not talking about hello, hi type of friends... I mean some one that will stand by u anytime, a guy u can trust a little..have u?

<<<what do u honestly think is holding u back from having an opposite sex companionship?

<<<u said u have graduated. I know that NYSC helps bring some people out of their shell. how did u manage to go through that without good platonic male friends/female friends?

<<<<Don't you think u are the one holding yourself back?

Richy4:
I got question for u op and i want you to answer me honestly

<<<< have you tried making male friends before..when i mean friends, i am not talking about hello, hi type of friends... I mean some one that will stand by u anytime, a guy u can trust a little..have u?

<<<what do u honestly think is holding u back from having an opposite sex companionship?

<<<u said u have graduated. I know that NYSC helps bring some people out of their shell. how did u manage to go through that without good platonic male friends/female friends?

<<<<Don't you think u are the one holding yourself back?

Thanks for this , throughout NYSC camped , I never made any friend . I was gripped with fear which answers your last summation. I know everyone can never be gregarious and I believe am the one holding myself back by recoiling instead of facing those fears . I have some male friends , 3 in total who can stand by me . What am working on most is my inner esteem , my confidence ,how to get rid of fears , face new situations and be happy with myself wether friends are around me or not. Like I said earlier, its just like am held down .Any time I tried getting free it will look like sth is drawing back and that's where the struggle lies . I appreciate you bro . God bless you big .

Today I went to the zoo just as Swissheart suggested but not alone . I went with my roommate and it was din and cool. Next one I will be going alone

Jamieb:
Today I went to the zoo just as Swissheart suggested but not alone . I went with my roommate and it was din and cool. Next one I will be going alone

Good
Next, Go to Agodi Gardens - Entrance Fee N500
Samonda - forgotten the name of the place (cinema, video games, bowling etc)
Shoprite Mall, Dugbe & Mobil
Winners Chapel Akobo also has a lot of Young Men and women there (opposite the Barracks) - Join the youth group
All the best

P.s have you considered having a pet?
That will keep you busy and your mind off things
Yout pet will also force you to meet new people

Jamieb:
Today I went to the zoo just as Swissheart suggested but not alone . I went with my roommate and it was din and cool. Next one I will be going alone

wow.....That's lovely. I am glad you feel cool today. Shey you didn't take pictures ni ? Like someone suggested.... That Shoprite mall is a cool place too. Don't waste this weekend o

Swissheart:
wow.....That's lovely. I am glad you feel cool today. Shey you didn't take pictures ni ? Like someone suggested.... That Shoprite mall is a cool place too. Don't waste this weekend o

I took .am uploading them now . Though I might not be comfortable including my face. Bear with me please ..

Jamieb:

I took .am uploading them now . Though I might not be comfortable including my face. Bear with me please ..

Okay,anything to make you happy. So,what's the plan for the weekend

Jamieb:


Thanks for this , throughout NYSC camped , I never made any friend . I was gripped with fear which answers your last summation. I know everyone can never be gregarious and I believe am the one holding myself back by recoiling instead of facing those fears . I have some male friends , 3 in total who can stand by me . What am working on most is my inner esteem , my confidence ,how to get rid of fears , face new situations and be happy with myself wether friends are around me or not. Like I said earlier, its just like am held down .Any time I tried getting free it will look like sth is drawing back and that's where the struggle lies . I appreciate you bro . God bless you big .

I am happy u are making progress... but what i'm gonna suggest might sound stupid and oyibo-ish...
Do u think you can go home one day and talk to your father about how u are feeling, Depression process heal easily when u confront the stuff u are dealing with...

In your own case, it might be the kind of parenting that u got.... if u can talk to him about how u have been feeling one cool day, maybe on your holidays.. it might help. it will be like u were psychologically asking for his permission to date.., after talking to him, u will be relieved as if nothing in the world is holding u back....

remember, It is not as if u were asking for his permission per say, it is just for the healing to be complete. since u have been living in fear about what he will do/ say all your teenage life, it might help u psychologically and it will speed up the healing process....when u subconsciously feel that nothing is holding u back in making friends...

Richy4:


I am happy u are making progress... but what i'm gonna suggest might sound stupid and oyibo-ish...
Do u think you can go home one day and talk to your father about how u are feeling, Depression process heal easily when u confront the stuff u are dealing with...

In your own case, it might be the kind of parenting that u got.... if u can talk to him about how u have been feeling one cool day, maybe on your holidays.. it might help. it will be like u were psychologically asking for his permission to date.., after talking to him, u will be relieved as if nothing in the world is holding u back....

remember, It is not as if u were asking for his permission per say, it is just for the healing to be complete. since u have been living in fear about what he will do/ say all your teenage life, it might help u psychologically and it will speed up the healing process....when u subconsciously feel that nothing is holding u back in making friends...

Thanks. I would have loved to do that but we are so worlds apart. I am domiciled in the west here while he has retired to the East. We barely see except if i decide to travel home for xmas.

@op, , passing through sometin like this too, serving in IB too. For me, having a gf is nt even an issue, but I still get lonely with em, and zone off. Let relate, trust me I know exactly how this feels

Jamieb:


Thanks for this , throughout NYSC camped , I never made any friend . I was gripped with fear which answers your last summation. I know everyone can never be gregarious and I believe am the one holding myself back by recoiling instead of facing those fears . I have some male friends , 3 in total who can stand by me . What am working on most is my inner esteem , my confidence ,how to get rid of fears , face new situations and be happy with myself wether friends are around me or not. Like I said earlier, its just like am held down .Any time I tried getting free it will look like sth is drawing back and that's where the struggle lies . I appreciate you bro . God bless you big .

Op get this book and read. The bang rule and the advanced bang rule and also find the game by neil strauss. Practice everything in those books and your live will never remain the same. The earlier the better. You are 24 in 6 years you will be 30 time is going.

mrjojo:
@op, , passing through sometin like this too, serving in IB too. For me, having a gf is nt even an issue, but I still get lonely with em, and zone off. Let relate, trust me I know exactly how this feels

Thanks Mr Jojo, would be nice meeting up with you bro. Am.sending you a pm now .Thanks

tensazangetsu20:

Op get this book and read. The bang rule and the advanced bang rule and also find the game by neil strauss. Practice everything in those books and your live will never remain the same. The earlier the better. You are 24 in 6 years you will be 30 time is going.

Thanks . time is really going truely . If things be equal I should settle down by 28 but the truth is if I can't find happiness been alone , even my wife can't make me happy . Are the books online or I can get them offline sir . Thanks bro

Jamieb:

Thanks . time is really going truely . If things be equal I should settle down by 28 but the truth is if I can't find happiness been alone , even my wife can't make me happy . Are the books online or I can get them offline sir . Thanks bro

You can buy them online. But you have to start talking to women. Go out and talk to at least 3 women per day, don't be afraid of rejection even the most handsome and richest men get rejected daily. Your mindset should be if she doesn't want me it's her loss. And even if you don't find a gf am sure you can build comfortable relationships with the opposite sex. Go out and meet them no matter the class or status of the woman talk to her. I was like you before very lonely and felt like shit. Had really low self esteem and it started affecting other directions of my life. So I went and bought the bang rule online and read it and I have 2 gfs now. Am really so into one of them. She just completed her masters and am in final year, she even spends on me and cooks for me. So if an ugly fat guy like me can achieve that after a month of reading the bang rule, what of you?.

Jamieb:

Thanks Mr Jojo, would be nice meeting up with you bro. Am.sending you a pm now .Thanks

replied

Jamieb,
You don't know how happy I am right now that you spoke out, you know what that means, it means you are on the path to total freedom. I bless d Lord dt u ain't part of d statistics of depressed who committed suicide. You see how much people's contributions have helped just in a short while, but you need total freedom and self discovery, this can only come thru Christ, your place of work isn't far from my place of worship,Living Faith Church, aka, winners chapel, Challenge beside top one, once you mention Top one, you can't miss your way, join us this Wednesday by 5pm for our mid week/communion service and your life will never remain the same, you can also get the books suggested books by fellow Nairalanders from our bookstore or if we can hook up, I can borrow u some. God bless u.

Jamieb:

Thanks . time is really going truely . If things be equal I should settle down by 28 but the truth is if I can't find happiness been alone , even my wife can't make me happy . Are the books online or I can get them offline sir . Thanks bro

Hey,how are you? Checking on you

Jamieb:

Not really . Never been to one before . Thanks , I have to visit one tomorrow then . I recognize I can't always be around people all my life . I need to build the confidence to be alone and be happy with myself within and without and I appreciate your effort .God bless you big ma

I think you have a Agoraphobia

OP, sorry about your condition. I totally understand, please get this book "How to restore your God given self - image. It contains everything you need to get yourself back and more.

Jamieb:
As i am typing this now, i am confused and depressed at the same time with my eyes full of tears. I am 24, done with school and now working but my life feel so empty like something have been plugged from my life. Most night, i go to bed feeling so lonely and dejected with no body to turn to. Physically i am very much ok but deep down i know something is missing in my life. I just dont know how to explain it. My upbringing was terrible. Grew up in a repressive manner with my dad who never want you talking with any one but just being indoor. Communication was zero. He goes out in the morning and return at night. We just cook and eat and go to bed and that has been the routine through out my teen years. For this, i never new what love was or is and never mixed with the opposite sex as i am constantly tormented with fear and that of rejection. lest i forget, being poor was an understatement as I am my elder bro could only boast of one meal per day most day . I entered the University thinking i would be free but rather it became worst. Through out my Uni days i never mixed up with the opposite sex let alone have a girlfriend but just a few male friends who i even get tired of. Most i do was to play football and recoil again into my shell. I knew something was wrong deep down but couldn't pin point or even know how to tackle it. Outside this feeling of hollowness , emptiness i slipped into masturbation unconsciously in my secondary school and it followed me through my uni days and even service and am still struggling to stop it finally. gradually i keep dying everyday with no one to run to as it seems no one have the solution to my problem or even understand what i am feeling . Sometimes i try to console myself that it is well , the next moment am back to square one. I have lived in Ibadan for almost two years now but no friends as I find it making friends let alone the opposite sex. I just can't explain it. Just like a self conflict within battling inside me with the struggle to be free. At this age I dont even have a girlfriend to call my own let alone one to marry. Any time i feel like walking up to one , all of a sudden it look as if something like a shadow is thrown over me an i get blank with it visible in my face. It is really bad that at a point in time , a friend of mine was forced to call someone else to come stay with me cos i was crying over the phone. Over time, I dont know if to term it psychological or spiritual one. I might be happy this moment when in the midst of people and the next everything winds down to a zero level, not to talk of when alone. I feel so lonely and dejected with no where to run to. As a matter of fact, am scared of living alone as i dont know what my life will be like. I know I can get help in the family section more than any other place . Please I need help. I need to get my life back.

Yawns
op u need to activate ur social life and make friends from your neighbor, church, bars, go out to watch movies and football, ur office colleagues, nairalanders in ur area, Facebook friends, gym, Reconnect with ur uni, sec sch frnds n visit once in a while.

Finally forget ur past and start building the future you desire. At 24yrs u r still a baby boy so u ve got d time BC some ppl at 45 yrs face this same problem.

Peace