₦airaland Forum

superstarDikk:
Lets be sincere to ourselves, Linda has plenty money but age is not on her side. in other words, she is old. What if all the rich guys say they won't marry an old mama? The lady said ' no condition is permanent' and she is right. Go ABJ go see as hitherto big and wealthy boys de sell their houses. you think say dem build am to sell am?

Beamborla:
Oh!

Except my comprehension skill is gradually detoriating. Babe didn't in any way say she wouldn't answer to her man. She said she won't marry a poor man... She earned the right to choose, miss.

...and no the creator didn't ask anyone to marry a poor man neither did it ask anyone to marry a rich man.

Didn't the creator instruct men to provide for their wives? Don't you think a poor man who can't provide basic needs comfortably for his wife shouldn't get married else he might be going against the instruction of the creator.

So stop bringing religious sentiment into this. Thanchuu!

PureWays:
I want to be the richest man in the world.

It's possible, if I can work by the "principles" that will make that happen.

You may also want to be the President of Nigeria someday, it's possible if you have what it takes to be it.

We all have right to wish and demand/expect something out of life. The big question is: are we capable and ready to sacrifice what it takes?

To me: Linda is just wishing, I don't think she's gotten the characteristics and behaviour to score the type of man she desires.

Successful men are wise men. I'm not talking about those that got their money through illicit means.

Well, she can always marry a white man.

CioAngels:
You are very right, her statement got me thinking. Who is a richman in Nigeria now, Ritualist, Stealling Politicians, Armd Robbers, Goverment Contractors who collectors money but don't do the jobs, Military men that steals the money of his junior officer at the warfront, Judges that collects huge amount to send Innocent persons to jail, Police officers that will kill man from abroad to steal his money and properties(makinde police station) and other groups of emergency richmen whose richies are cursed. Could these group of richmen that my linda ekeji wants for a husband? Centainly No.

PeridotBelle:
Praised by what dudes, it's the reality which u need to wake up to. Gender did not render anyone helpless, that's even a funny and unfortunate thing for u to say.

The earlier you realize that all that which Linda said are just careless talks which she herself does not even buy in, the better for you.

I hate arguing with people who tend to take things too personal like you just did, so pls am done talking to you, don't waltz into my mention again.
Thanks

Edwinmason:
and wide

chimere66:
Ebonyi state Lawmaker popularly known as Afikpo Chic, Hon Maria Ude Nwachi has called out popular blogger Linda Ikeji over recent statements made by the blogger that she can't marry a poor man.The lawmaker who considers Linda's statement an affront on humanity, said Linda should know that no condition is permanent.According to her, Linda can't have it both ways and must learn to humble herself if she truly wants to find a man who will marry her.Below is what she wrote....

'Linda, you cannot have it both ways.

I personally did a lot of damage control for Linda Ikeji when it was alleged she said; she can buy any man with her money. I sincerely did not believe she can utter such; as I could not imagine any reasonable human being saying such. I defended her with all my might. I Paid Facebook and Google to boost and promote the article I took my time to create, image-making style, in order to squash that allegation. Remember, I do not know her in any shape. Never met her. Never spoken with her. I know her the same way millions do, via the fact that she is famous blogger. I Just did it from my heart; for I see her as a role model to women and youths. And I did not want such dent on her image.

Recently, power-blogger, Linda Ikeji, told an interviewer that she can never marry a poor man. Hear her: "No, I can’t marry a poor guy and I’m being honest about it. He doesn’t have to be rich but let him be successful in his own way. When I was 30, my standards were extremely high. Now, I have only three criteria. He must be successful. He must be a good man in the sense that he has to be very supportive of what I do. If he tries to stifle me, I’m out. The third one, is the one that likes to eat groceries well (laughs)."n

On her latest statement, I do not agree with her at all. Firstly; a rich man is nothing but a poor man with money. And; no condition in life is ever permanent.

The scariest thing for a man to hear is not even the one of her saying she can't marry a poor man, it is the one she says that she would be out if a man tries to stifle her. Then she better just create the man from scratch. Because there is no man, especially African man, that will not attempt to stifle his wife every now and then. That innocuous utterance has already sent strong signals to those successful men she is seeking that they better go and marry someone that will not attempt to wear the trouser at home with them; and not her. It also indicates to those successful men she wants that she will never be submissive in anyway to them; that she no send and is ready for a divorce at any given time. She is basically preempting divorce even before marriage.

The major reason men, especially African men are working hard to be successful is so they can get that woman they want, that will give them a peaceful home, and the leeway to be the oga of the house. Why would a man go through it all to make it only to marry a woman who is going to become the man of the house with him.

Important: A man is a man, poor or rich. No man with his head in intact, will be okay for a woman to control him. Even if the woman is richer than money itself. It will not happen. Even the poorest man on earth would rather be eating his Indomie in peace than to be controlled by any woman. This applies even in the civilized world. This not about pride, this is human nature.

On money: Being rich, poor or broke is not a permanent state of being. Moreover; money is not the be all and end all of life. Some people are very rich today not just by hard work but by force of universe which can also be interpreted as grace. Let us not dismiss people based on their current condition. Moreover, he only thing constant in life is change.

Hear Linda, "I keep telling people. It’s not that men are scarce. They are not scarce. The type of men that some of us are looking for are scarce. If I want to get married next week, I can. I want a man that I can look up to. Somebody that inspires me, somebody that will push me, motivate me; somebody who has had some success in his own career. I’m inspired by successful people. I can’t wait to meet someone like Tyler Perry."

Now let us talk about the definition of success. According to her, she wants to marry a successful man, but the man does not have to be rich. This is a huge oxymoron (an epigrammatic effect, by which contradictory terms are used in conjunction). Success is defined as;
the accomplishment of an aim or purpose. And it does not take a genius to understand that by successful, she means a wealthy man. A man of means. Going by the example she gives as her kind of man, Tyler Perry, she has dropped all the hint any one needs to know concerning her idea of a successful man. Perry is an ultra-rich American actor, comedian, producer, director, screenwriter, playwright, author, and songwriter.

The problem i see with Linda is that she is often too open about her feelings. I will advise that in her search for a man that she should keep some of her criterias private. This is not America, this is not oyibo land where women can say and do anything with minimal or no consequence. Emotional intelligence is knowing your environment and adapting to it; especially when it comes to utterances, actions etc. It is not everything the heart conceives that must be uttered publicly.

Dear Linda, you can't have it both ways. You can't eat your cake and have it too. Being a very successful woman in Nigeria, you must be willing to compromise when it comes to relationships with the opposite sex. You might not be a girl, due to your high level, a man can tell what to do or what not to do, but you must not say such out loud, you must give vibes that you can be told what to do by your man, you must do your best to show them the utmost respect, the most respect you can muster to give them. You are going to have to eat humble pies for your man many a times. And it is okay my darling, it will take nothing away from you. Let the man to feel he is in control. You must try and do that. It is not an option, it is necessary.

By your success alone, you have made many men feel a bit less manly, and so to even rub it in by reading them riot acts to them, is an overkill. Humility is a natural gift, those who are humble by nature will remain humble even if they become the richest on earth. But humility can be learned too, in dealing with the opposite sex you will need a mighty doze of humility, nnem, learn it if by force biko. Always remember that a man is a man is man is a man. Respect matter to a man; no matter his status and class. Linda, in the end you will have the last laugh, when you are running around with your cute kids doing one or two things and your hubby by your side. When you are compromising and eating them humble pies, think of your family (your own kid/s and man) and it will all be worth it.

By virtue of you being a very successful woman, African woman for that matter, no matter who you marry, it is not going to be easy. But if you do your math properly, do some adjustments and amendments, you won't have any regrets. Life as we know it is not a bed of roses for anyone, if you have this, you might not have that, so it's all about compromise and middle-ground.

You are a very public figure. Your public utterances must be guided. By virtue of your rag to riches success story; you have become an involuntary role model to many; including me. You are intelligent but you need to take a class on emotional intelligence. Be very mindful of your public statements please. I wish you more success in life. Thank you.

Sincerely yours,
Maria Ude Nwachi (Afikpo Chic).
#BCEL - Best Chic Ever Liveth (Nwanyi Afikpo)'.


Source: http://www.trezzyhelm.com/2016/11/ebonyi-lawmaker-to-linda-ikeji-over.html

repogirl:
Afikpo chic did really well with this write up but in a good marriage, both partners are supposed to make compromises for the other one once in a while.

A marriage where only the woman has to step down all the time for the husband won't be a happy one and that's probably what Linda meant. I agree that a man should be the head of the home and take the lead but good leaders also listen and are accommodating to their subordinate's ideas. Good leaders will not be selfish in making decisions, good leaders take into consideration their partners/ subordinate's before making decisions.

A situation where a leader always wants his own way will be frustrating to others, won't it? So compromise is the way to go....one has to step down for the other at some point .

As for Linda, leave her ooooooo! Shebi as you lay your bed is the same way you will lie on it ? She has her requirements which is very fine. I don't blame her, a lot of leeches would love to attach on to her cos of her money and success so she is being careful. I guess she is the type that doesn't want a divorce after marriage but In being careful she also has to realise that life isn't a fairytale.

Life is very real. No man can posses all those qualities she mentioned, even Tyler Perry sef has plenty issues. There are rumours he is gay and he isn't even married.

Sometimes you meet an awesome guy who isn't successful yet but in your heart you know he's one of the good ones and probably quite industrious. why not be his woman and see him achieve success.

I think she believes every man is after her money sha and it's very possible. Ninety eight percent of men she meets most likely find her interesting because she is rich.

Well like they say....more money more problems.

uzolexis:
at the bolded bold, I can't believe this. Women it is not ok for your man to stifle you, it is not right pls, your man is supposed to be your biggest fan, your best supporter and you are supposed to be his as well. Women, know your worth biko.

refreshrate:
How wizkid describe the thing again sef?

Beamborla:
That's the problem. Quit threatening women with menopause... It's better to be happily single than tearfully married.

Marriage or childbearing is not the peak or the purpose of a woman's existence. It's time mothers start teaching their girl child that becoming a Mrs. is not what your life is all about.

If it happens beautifully, fine! The male spicie is not doing us any favour by marrying us.

Skyfornia:
This Afikpo Chic is talking rubbish...you are almost 40 without husband yet you are giving another lady tips for a successful marriage? Which kain irony be this? Free Linda joor...she said she want someone who is successful, the problem is many people don't know the meaning of being successful...they think someone having too much money is being successful. A guy who manages a 10 thousand naira business very well is successful. A student who passed his exams is successful, if I put my mind to do anything and I achieve positive result at the end, I'm successful!

Young03:
tell her oo

she dey find a man wey sabi fûck well while her Toto don old

uzolexis:
Somebody pls help me understand the problem with Linda's statement cos I don't see it. At the bolded, she wants a successful man and he doesn't have to be rich. Pls who wants to marry a failure for Christ sake, she also wants a man who would be supportive, pple your husband/wife should be your greatest fan and support you not stifle you, seriously, I don't get why this Afikpo chick and others sre getting worked up over this

saintandsinnerz:
Please can you differentiate what you mean with the highlighted part? It looks contradictory to me. Please can you educate me on the difference between richness and success in the context Linda used it

Skyfornia:
This Afikpo Chic is talking rubbish...you are almost 40 without husband yet you are giving another lady tips for a successful marriage? Which kain irony be this? Free Linda joor...she said she want someone who is successful, the problem is many people don't know the meaning of being successful...they think someone having too much money is being successful. A guy who manages a 10 thousand naira business very well is successful. A student who passed his exams is successful, if I put my mind to do anything and I achieve positive result at the end, I'm successful!

theGistsonline:
or more like.... our legislators are lazy monkeys who delve into issues that aren't of socioeconomic importance

Beamborla:
She said she can't marry a poor man, let her be. She is successful and have the right to turn down a poor guy.

When men talk about the standard they want, they don't get hushed up.

PeridotBelle:
Meaning no matter how high a woman flies, she remains a woman who is to to answer to a man (her husband) even if the man is low!

Society did not make it that way, the creator of mankind made it so! Society is gradually trying to kill that and it's wrong because, the consequences are grave!

Skyfornia:
This Afikpo Chic is talking rubbish...you are almost 40 without husband yet you are giving another lady tips for a successful marriage? Which kain irony be this? Free Linda joor...she said she want someone who is successful, the problem is many people don't know the meaning of being successful...they think someone having too much money is being successful. A guy who manages a 10 thousand naira business very well is successful. A student who passed his exams is successful, if I put my mind to do anything and I achieve positive result at the end, I'm successful!

Beamborla:
She said she can't marry a poor man, let her be. She is successful and have the right to turn down a poor guy.

When men talk about the standard they want, they don't get hushed up.

uzolexis:
Stifling you is not the same thing as correcting you. Of course my man should be able to correct me and vice versa and "not put me to order" like you wrote there. Marriage is not for kids, it's for mature adults, nobody is putting anybody to order in marriage. If one partner does not like something the other is doing they should both talk about it. But my man should not stifle me and I should not stifle him as well, heck anyone that tries to stifle you is not even a good friend.

Beamborla:
She said she can't marry a poor man, let her be. She is successful and have the right to turn down a poor guy.

When men talk about the standard they want, they don't get hushed up.

uzolexis:
Somebody already explained that below... @the bold

PeridotBelle:
that's all I got to say! your man should not put you to order??

tartarus:
You obviously aren't intelligent. Never bring up your religious beliefs into an intelligent argument or conversation, not everyone believes your god is the creator.

saintandsinnerz:
His explanation was shallow and out of context. He didn't address success based on the context Linda used it. So based on the context (emphasis on context) Linda used it, can you differentiate between being successful and being rich as used by Linda?

"No, I can’t marry a poor guy and I’m being honest about it. He doesn’t have to be rich but let him be successful in his own way. When I was 30, my standards were extremely high. Now, I have only three criteria. He must be successful. He must be a good man in the sense that he has to be very supportive of what I do. If he tries to stifle me, I’m out.