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When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 5:16pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
You’ve heard the saying, don’t judge a book by its cover or in this case, its author. While others elect to see Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming clouded by the controversial personality of the author, this article seeks to appraise it as a work of literature embodying social consciousness; the reality of what African women go through in marriages with unfaithful partners. Source: http://pulse.ng/bloggers/pulse-blogger-when-the-other-woman-triumphs-a-literary-review-of-toke-makinwa-s-on-becoming-id5833018.html 28 Likes 8 Shares |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 5:17pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
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Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Brymo: 5:20pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
Don't waste your time trying to provide people with proof of deceit, in order to keep their love, win their love or salvage their respect for you. The truth is this: If they care they will go out of their way to learn the truth. If they don't then they really don't value you as a human being. The moment you have to sell people on who you are is the moment you let yourself believe that every good thing you have ever done or accomplished was invisible to the world. And, it is not! Shannon L. Alder 12 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 5:38pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
Brymo: A lot especially if you're female 30 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 5:47pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
cc: lalasticlala, mynd44, Obinnau ... It's not imperative for a woman to make a marriage work. If a marriage isn't working, it isn't an automatic pointer to the failings of the woman as a wife. And if a woman has lost faith in the union and no longer believes the marriage is worth investing in – either due to [repeated] emotional and/or physical abuse – she should be able to extricate herself from the murky quagmire without fear of being tailed by the shadows of stigma. [...] This is brilliant work, Kelly. Your review deifies the book and has succeeded in making it mouth-watering. I wish I could read it soon; my crowded reading schedule however cannot allow for that. I think Toke's story should be made into a Nollywood movie. It would be box-office! 34 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 5:54pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
DarkRebel101: Thank you dear, its the kind of publicity Toke would appreciate being who she is, that is the Nolloywood movie part 5 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 5:56pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
Took time to read this book remaining the last chapter, in as much as i don't think Maje is faithful and wasn't committed to the relationship, I can't help but notice Toke's mistake, she saw all the signs from Aisha to Hauwa to Anita yet Maje was too good looking to let go,happy she took me through memory lane the Guiness story I got the power.I think she should have been cooking for him,but girls of nowadays they are too influence by the wrong media.Anyway Maje has his own very big fault but it would have been easy if the melodrama isn't much,he isn't a saint when u meant him so he won't be a pope after,it is even tough when there is no trust.Well to be quite honest the only thing I learnt from this book is that my sister Toke is a very strong woman who had gone through and tolerate a lot of bullshit but dear it is a man's world it is our nature to be drift away by beauty while women by emotions.Anyway I hope Maje published a Rejoiner I can guess the Title :Maje Not my will 16 Likes 1 Share |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 6:02pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
uruba23: The truth remains she brought most of the problem on herself when she overlooked the important signs and that was a big sign of LSE (low self esteem) but at the end of the day, I'm happy she learned from it. And i agree with you, the story is really one sided. Maybe one of these days Maje and Anita will tell us their parts 15 Likes |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Brymo: 6:05pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
skarlett:sell the book to me, as if you are Toke, in three lines. 1 Like |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by stan241(m): 6:19pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
But you won't see Nigerians taking this keen interest in other worthy and highly educative books published by young scholars daily,each to his own i know but the level of publicity we give this let's face it ordinary people is alarming, why would i want to read a book that details a persons failed marriage Now say uncle Olu and aunty Joke decide to write a book on marriage,now that's one I'd spend my money on cus even though they may not be a perfect couple, they've been together long enough and have been a model example of what Marriage in general should be like not some colourful character writing a book and our so called "youths" jumping on the bandwagon like bees to honey Again to each his/her own i guess 58 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by bitingcool: 6:23pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
Brymo: Player meets fall back girl. I actually feel pity for Anita the most. 'cos he was and probably is still cheating on her too. She's even more stuck than Toke. In love with a man who would never 'stay put' even if he has d deepest feelings for her (his pr.i.ck would agree otherwise) Toke created the disaster, she should have walked away but then, the heart wants what it wants. I'll give her a big hug when I see her. I admire the strength she has, Thhe bullsh.!t resiliency and the fact that she was truthful to herself. A broken relationship is never a one sided affair. You have to sink deep to acknowledge that fact Good read actually. Captivating too. Money well spent I'd say. 17 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 6:25pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
skarlett:I don't think it was LSE (low self esteem) I think Maje was quite romantic he was every woman's dream, he was worth fighting for,but he wasn't good at keeping his slate clean.He was a fairy tale story but life is no fairy tale.Think about it if a guy told you he doesn't want to disrespect his ex,it definitely would look obvious he respect women but in actual fact he was just acting a line from Robert Greene :The art of Seduction 3 Likes |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 6:33pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
uruba23: No matter how romantic a man is, there's a limit where the woman should draw the line. There were obvious signs that he was cheating even while they were dating. Friends saw him with other woman, she saw messages, even saw some of the women. At one point he gave her an STI and she allegedly had proof he also gave his mistress same so what are we talking about? She saw everything, yet she chose to stick with him believing that he would change. Well, the saying goes, once a cheat, always a cheat. She said it in the book too that she had self esteem issues, she broke up with Maje but still went back to him many times just because she didn't value herself. To me thats not love or affection or even romance, that is looking down on yourself, seeing yourself as unworthy to stay with a man who loves you and proves it by being loyal 10 Likes 1 Share |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 6:37pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
"Among the men, when they attempt comforting words, they usually end up with statements like: ‘It’s a man’s world and what he did was bad, but forgive him because we are all not saints." Quite weird was reading the last chapter and I saw this and this" Women, on the other hand, tend to be more emotional so they rarely speak directly. Instead they give a hug or recite a Bible verse and expect you to get it. " 1 Like |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 6:39pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
stan241: The truth is, Toke is popular, like her or hate her, she's become a force to reckon with in the TV/Radio industry and who told you we can't learn from failure? We can learn from failure as much as we can success. She didnt write a book on what marriage should look like, she wrote a book on what her marriage was like with a philanderer. Yes I'm part of the youths jumping the bandwagon of reading the book and even taking my time to review it, you know why? Because knowledge from whatever medium is not wasted. 31 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by stan241(m): 6:42pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
skarlett: Well good for you if you've picked up something from what she wrote,hopefully you've learnt one or two pitfalls to avoid when you tie the knot 2 Likes |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 6:43pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
Brymo: Someone beat me to it and he did a nice job of it too 2 Likes |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 6:45pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
stan241: I have dear, every woman should learn the lesson too; love yourself first 14 Likes |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Warfibabe(f): 6:48pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
Reading Toke's book, that their relationship from the beginning na LAWMA get am. my first reaction was anger, at Maje for cheating on her serially with different women and expecting d door to always be open when he wanders back. Then at toke for always opening the door everytime he knocks. How the hell did she even breathe all through?. BRB to edit pls. 12 Likes 1 Share |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by stan241(m): 6:52pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
skarlett: See the thing here and sorry I'm over stretching this discussion but I'm sure without reading that book you knew you had to "love yourself first", a lot of the excerpts I've read are basic things everyone knows and I'm sure there are folks who have/are going through worse in their marriages, the whole book ish and the attention its gotten just gets on my nerves cus she's not really written anything special But its like you said,she's a public figure so i guess that explains it 1 Like |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 6:58pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
stan241:I don't think we should rant over the book been published I think we should take the lessons with us recently she celebrated her dogs birthday and the question was why,I think after reading the book you should let Toke be Toke she had admit her mistake, and she is moving on. 8 Likes |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 7:04pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
stan241: There's no need to apologize dear, i welcome any opportunity to have an enlightening discussion even if our opinions are polar opposites. I think from her stand point, she decided to tell her side of the story maybe to gain some sympathy, some say its for money but I strongly believe its to speak up for celebrities that have been blamed for the failure of their marriages. Some of the mistakes she made could have been avoided but at that time, according to her, she allowed her heart rule her head. Plus there is nothing wrong in reinforcing a lesson, she was a relationship expert who dished advice left, right and centre but couldn't follow her own counsel when it came down to it. That is to say, some of us actually know these things but following them nko? That's another ball game entirely. 8 Likes |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by stan241(m): 7:12pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
skarlett: Your last paragraph,that there just kinda buttresses my point altogether, do as i say not as i do,i mean who does that Look maybe I'm old fashioned like that but i come from the school of thought where people who are celebrated in society should have done something really tangible or made a significant contribution to society not someone whose claim to fame is "E-advice" that such person doesn't even bother to follow 8 Likes |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 7:20pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
stan241: You did notice my use of past tense right? She was that woman who gave advice and couldnt follow it but at the end of the day, she finally sees the light of her own advice and takes it. You should read the book tho, maybe you'll get a more objective look at it and not be influenced by media hype or snippets of scandalous statements. 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by rachealfst(f): 7:24pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
skarlett:Hmm, Thats just the basic truth. some of us knows this things, but it's easier said than done. 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by stan241(m): 7:29pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
skarlett: Maybe just maybe one day when I'm not so frustrated at how messed up this country is, I'd give it a read,maybe learn a thing or two too |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Nobody: 7:34pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
stan241: |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by stan241(m): 7:37pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
skarlett: Even though your signature has awon werey, was nice discussing with someone who didn't throw a fit at the first person to disagree with them 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by pweetixandy: 7:39pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
Toke just wanted to do to maje what tiwa did to teebillz, kill them off. however, I wonder why Toke never mentioned her dating other people whenever she and maje were on a break. is she insinuating that maje was the only man she had ever been with in those 12 long years? she shld have mentioned it, but she was to busy portraying herself a saint. 11 Likes 1 Share |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by helovesme(f): 7:40pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
Finished reading the book at 3am this morning. its a rather interesting book i must say. . . . . . how she lost her parents in very tragic circumstances . . . . the part where she wanted to take the largest TV in the house and that was all maje cared about . . . . the part where anita told her point blank that her son was planned . . . . .what about maje's planned press release to pulseTV . . . . .maje's numerous girlfriends, lies and antics sigh!!! i think what really attracted her to maje from the very onset was his ''big boy'' status. He was British educated, his family owned a bank, he worked at the family's bank and his family had 'pedigree'. i wish she had dwelt much more on her career, her fashion/style, etc. overall, a very good book. i will rate it 7 out of 10. 19 Likes 1 Share |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by remmyton(f): 7:40pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
Hmm |
Re: When The ‘other Woman’ Triumphs: A Literary Review Of Toke Makinwa’s On Becoming by Pavore9: 7:40pm On Nov 30, 2016 |
A toxic marriage is not worth dying for! Real Happiness starts from within you, why should anyone waste the short span of our earthly existence trying to seek validation from the inconsistencies of a fellow mortal? 8 Likes 3 Shares |
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