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Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects - Religion - Nairaland

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Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by Pastafarian: 3:12pm On Jan 11, 2017
Let's ask Christian sects how to define Actual Christianity:

Methodist: It is accepting Jesus as your Lord and Savior and publicly sharing that acceptance by getting baptized through sprinkling of water.

Baptist: No, no, no -- you must be DUNKED in water, heathen.

Pentecostal: Yer both wrong -- ye must be baptized by the Holy Spirit and ye must speak in tongues to prove you are saved.

Lutherans: You don't need to do any of that. Our founder said just believe and have faith (oh yeah and he REALLY hated Jews).

Presbyterian: How droll -- lol. No no..you see it does not matter what you do or do not, God has already decided who the true Christians will be and they are obviously all Presbyterians.

Episcopalians: Well, we each get to decide what constitutes Christianity. What is in your heart? What do you think it is for you? What say you, Bishop Spong?

Church of Christ: None of you are going to heaven because you use musical instruments in your services and God hates that.

Jehovah's Witness: Something Something Kingdom Hall; something something no birthdays, several End Times falsely predicted, no blood transfusions,,,,

Seventh Day Adventist: Pah! None of you even have the right day.

United Church of Christ: It's all good; let's listen to an acoustic guitar solo and accept gay people.

Non-denominational: Gay people? ewww. No no, ye must build megachurches with gyms and cafes to be righteous to god.

Catholic: Ummm....oldest sect here, guys. Forget that "accepting Jesus" stuff. You must mediate with God via a priest and eat crackers to get saved (just do not leave your kids alone with said priests, OK?). Oh yeah..and Virgin Mary is way cool.

Church of England: Yeah, what the Catholic said...but divorce is 100% OK.

Unitarian Universalists: Why are you guys even trying to define Christianity? All beliefs are the same (whoops.we aint even Christians).

15 Likes 8 Shares

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by hesupamo: 3:19pm On Jan 11, 2017
LLLLLLOOOOOOLLLLLLLL

1 Like

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by Kondomatic(m): 3:20pm On Jan 11, 2017
Lols
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by Wolexdey(m): 7:31pm On Jan 11, 2017
Christ can never be ridiculed...You can only ridicule your very self...


That's just the fact friend...I hope this makes you smile...Hahhaaha

1 Like

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by randomperson: 8:44pm On Jan 11, 2017
Epic!!!
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by hopefulLandlord: 2:24pm On Jan 12, 2017
tongue
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by hahn(m): 5:09pm On Jan 12, 2017
Lol.

Christianity is a very ridiculous religion

How can an ideology supposedly from one god have 50 versions of it's holy book with over 300,000 denominations and counting is beyond my own comprehension.

Or maybe I just do not understand much about delusion the spirit tongue

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by mrmrmister: 5:27pm On Jan 12, 2017
These are true christians

7 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by hopefulLandlord: 8:39pm On Jan 12, 2017
mrmrmister:
These are true christians
that's Kingebukasblog people
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by Nobody: 9:21pm On Jan 12, 2017
hahn:
Lol.

Christianity is a very ridiculous religion

How can an ideology supposedly from one god have 50 versions of it's holy book with over 300,000 denominations and counting is beyond my own comprehension.

Or maybe I just do not understand much about delusion the spirit tongue
Senseless comment undecided
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by hahn(m): 10:06pm On Jan 12, 2017
Revelation1:
Senseless comment undecided

Do you have anything reasonable to say regarding the op or are you marketing idiocy? undecided
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by HCpaul(m): 11:21pm On Jan 12, 2017
mrmrmister:
These are true christians

The picture though....

Am just happy that I claimed back my life last year.

Imagine those who still trade theirs (people in the above picture), they are the people called the light and the salt of the world (those that will soon inherit the earth).
Some sect of Christians are more delusional than one another; maybe it's because that they aspire to become a first class citizen of heaven.

Finally, the theory of a life without Jesus is preferable to the theory of a life with Jesus.

1 Like

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by hopefulLandlord: 9:35am On Jan 13, 2017
hahn:


Do you have anything reasonable to say regarding the op or are you marketing idiocy? undecided

he doesn't

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by hahn(m): 10:22am On Jan 13, 2017
hopefulLandlord:


he doesn't

Na their trademark
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by jonbellion(m): 11:20am On Jan 13, 2017
hopefulLandlord:


that's Kingebukasblog people
chaiiii
So that's the church KingEbukasBlog attends
Lmao!!!
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by Nobody: 12:34pm On Jan 13, 2017
jonbellion:
chaiiii
So that's the church KingEbukasBlog attends
Lmao!!!
Ebuka is a Lord's chosen fanatic
grin grin
He's probably that dude on the floor

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by Nobody: 12:48pm On Jan 13, 2017
HCpaul:


The picture though....

Am just happy that I claimed back my life last year.

Imagine those who still trade theirs (people in the above picture), they are the people called the light and the salt of the world (those that will soon inherit the earth).
Some sect of Christians are more delusional than one another; maybe it's because that they aspire to become a first class citizen of heaven.

Finally, the theory of a life without Jesus is preferable to the theory of a life with Jesus.
Hcpaul I was going through your transition the other day it was quite a breakthrough, it took you five months from your first religious posting to become an atheist.
grin
The funniest part was when you came out as atheist and kingebukasblog couldn't believe it. He thought it was a joke
grin grin grin
He was like

4 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by randomperson: 1:04pm On Jan 13, 2017
Lennycool:

Hcpaul I was going through your transition the other day it was quite a breakthrough, it took you five months from your first religious posting to become an atheist.
grin
The funniest part was when you came out as atheist and kingebukasblog couldn't believe it. He thought it was a joke
grin grin grin
He was like
Really?? Can u please post the link cheesy
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by Nobody: 1:27pm On Jan 13, 2017
randomperson:

Really?? Can u please post the link cheesy
It's quite funny. The guy was a passionate Christian apologist, he and Ebuka were just busy apologising for the Lord till his sudden change.
grin
Ebuka's response was priceless.
grin grin
https://www.nairaland.com/3219522/why-christains-lie#47444226
He probably wanted to chase the guy like this

1 Like

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by Nobody: 3:44pm On Jan 13, 2017
Pastafarian:
Let's ask Christian sects how to define Actual Christianity:

Methodist: It is accepting Jesus as your Lord and Savior and publicly sharing that acceptance by getting baptized through sprinkling of water.

Baptist: No, no, no -- you must be DUNKED in water, heathen.

Pentecostal: Yer both wrong -- ye must be baptized by the Holy Spirit and ye must speak in tongues to prove you are saved.

Lutherans: You don't need to do any of that. Our founder said just believe and have faith (oh yeah and he REALLY hated Jews).

Presbyterian: How droll -- lol. No no..you see it does not matter what you do or do not, God has already decided who the true Christians will be and they are obviously all Presbyterians.

Episcopalians: Well, we each get to decide what constitutes Christianity. What is in your heart? What do you think it is for you? What say you, Bishop Spong?

Church of Christ: None of you are going to heaven because you use musical instruments in your services and God hates that.

Jehovah's Witness: Something Something Kingdom Hall; something something no birthdays, several End Times falsely predicted, no blood transfusions,,,,

Seventh Day Adventist: Pah! None of you even have the right day.

United Church of Christ: It's all good; let's listen to an acoustic guitar solo and accept gay people.

Non-denominational: Gay people? ewww. No no, ye must build megachurches with gyms and cafes to be righteous to god.

Catholic: Ummm....oldest sect here, guys. Forget that "accepting Jesus" stuff. You must mediate with God via a priest and eat crackers to get saved (just do not leave your kids alone with said priests, OK?). Oh yeah..and Virgin Mary is way cool.

Church of England: Yeah, what the Catholic said...but divorce is 100% OK.

Unitarian Universalists: Why are you guys even trying to define Christianity? All beliefs are the same (whoops.we aint even Christians).

A dictionary definition of a Christian would be
something similar to “a person professing belief in
Jesus as the Christ or in the religion based on the
teachings of Jesus.” While this is a good starting
point, like many dictionary definitions, it falls
somewhat short of really communicating the biblical
truth of what it means to be a Christian. The word
“Christian” is used three times in the New Testament
( Acts 11:26 ; 26:28 ; 1 Peter 4:16 ). Followers of
Jesus Christ were first called “Christians” in Antioch
( Acts 11:26 ) because their behavior, activity, and
speech were like Christ. The word “Christian” literally
means, “belonging to the party of Christ” or a
“follower of Christ.” Unfortunately over time, the word
“Christian” has lost a great deal of its significance
and is often used of someone who is religious or has
high moral values but who may or may not be a true
follower of Jesus Christ. Many people who do not
believe and trust in Jesus Christ consider themselves
Christians simply because they go to church or they
live in a “Christian” nation. But going to church,
serving those less fortunate than you, or being a good
person does not make you a Christian. Going to
church does not make you a Christian any more than
going to a garage makes you an automobile. Being a
member of a church, attending services regularly, and
giving to the work of the church does not make you a
Christian.
The Bible teaches that the good works we do cannot
make us acceptable to God. Titus 3:5 says, “He
saved us, not because of righteous things we had
done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through
the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy
Spirit.”
So, a Christian is someone who has been born again
by God ( John 3:3 ; John 3:7 ; 1 Peter 1:23 ) and has
put his or her faith and trust in Jesus Christ.
Ephesians 2:8 tells us that it is “…by grace you have
been saved, through faith—and this not from
yourselves, it is the gift of God.”
Therefore, a Christian puts faith and trust in the
person and work of Jesus Christ, including His death
on the cross as payment for sins and His
resurrection on the third day. John 1:12 tells us, “Yet
to all who received him, to those who believed in his
name, he gave the right to become children of God.”
The mark of a true Christian is love for others and
obedience to God’s Word ( 1 John 2:4 , 10). A true
Christian is indeed a child of God, a part of God’s
true family, and one who has been given new life in
Jesus Christ.

1 Like

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by hopefulLandlord: 4:46pm On Jan 13, 2017
Lennycool:

It's quite funny. The guy was a passionate Christian apologist, he and Ebuka were just busy apologising for the Lord till his sudden change.
grin
Ebuka's response was priceless.
grin grin
https://www.nairaland.com/3219522/why-christains-lie#47444226
He probably wanted to chase the guy like this


Lol

1 Like

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by hahn(m): 5:19pm On Jan 13, 2017
Junia:


A dictionary definition of a Christian would be
something similar to “a person professing belief in
Jesus as the Christ or in the religion based on the
teachings of Jesus.” While this is a good starting
point, like many dictionary definitions, it falls
somewhat short of really communicating the biblical
truth of what it means to be a Christian. The word
“Christian” is used three times in the New Testament
( Acts 11:26 ; 26:28 ; 1 Peter 4:16 ). Followers of
Jesus Christ were first called “Christians” in Antioch
( Acts 11:26 ) because their behavior, activity, and
speech were like Christ. The word “Christian” literally
means, “belonging to the party of Christ” or a
“follower of Christ.” Unfortunately over time, the word
“Christian” has lost a great deal of its significance
and is often used of someone who is religious or has
high moral values but who may or may not be a true
follower of Jesus Christ. Many people who do not
believe and trust in Jesus Christ consider themselves
Christians simply because they go to church or they
live in a “Christian” nation. But going to church,
serving those less fortunate than you, or being a good
person does not make you a Christian. Going to
church does not make you a Christian any more than
going to a garage makes you an automobile. Being a
member of a church, attending services regularly, and
giving to the work of the church does not make you a
Christian.
The Bible teaches that the good works we do cannot
make us acceptable to God. Titus 3:5 says, “He
saved us, not because of righteous things we had
done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through
the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy
Spirit.”
So, a Christian is someone who has been born again
by God ( John 3:3 ; John 3:7 ; 1 Peter 1:23 ) and has
put his or her faith and trust in Jesus Christ.
Ephesians 2:8 tells us that it is “…by grace you have
been saved, through faith—and this not from
yourselves, it is the gift of God.”
Therefore, a Christian puts faith and trust in the
person and work of Jesus Christ, including His death
on the cross as payment for sins and His
resurrection on the third day. John 1:12 tells us, “Yet
to all who received him, to those who believed in his
name, he gave the right to become children of God.”
The mark of a true Christian is love for others and
obedience to God’s Word ( 1 John 2:4 , 10). A true
Christian is indeed a child of God, a part of God’s
true family, and one who has been given new life in
Jesus Christ.

At least if you will copy and paste junk add the link to where you got the write up from. Ever heard of plagiarism? undecided

1 Like

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by Nobody: 5:24pm On Jan 13, 2017
hahn:


At least if you will copy and paste junk add the link to where you got the write up from. Ever heard of plagiarism? undecided

There are scriptures attached to it to proof everything there
Now i didnt conclude that you should believe it
U can choose to do or say what you want
But the fact is what i have posted

1 Like

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by hahn(m): 5:24pm On Jan 13, 2017
Junia:


There are scriptures attached to it to proof everything there
Now i didnt conclude that you should believe it
U can choose to do or say what you want
But the fact is what i have posted

Did you write that article yourself?
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by Nobody: 5:26pm On Jan 13, 2017
hahn:

Did you write that article yourself?
No
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by hahn(m): 5:40pm On Jan 13, 2017
Junia:


No

Then give credit to whoever wrote it

I know your parents just bought you a phone and some mb and you are new to the internet. Google the word "plagiarism" for better understanding smiley
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by Nobody: 5:46pm On Jan 13, 2017
hahn:


Then give credit to whoever wrote it

I know your parents just bought you a phone and some mb and you are new to the internet. Google the word "plagiarism" for better understanding smiley

Haha
So funny
I understand plagiarism
Im not claiming ownership of ones article
And note that we Christians are one body in Christ
I rejoice in every good thing my fellow Christian does
And as this fact edifies .. i chose to share ..
1 Corinthians 3:6
I planted the seed in your hearts, and Apollos watered it, but it was God who made it grow.

Therefore .. a Christian brother wrote it .. i shared it here .. but it is God who can touch hearts to believe it.

1 Like

Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by urahara(m): 9:21pm On Jan 15, 2017
Lennycool:

Hcpaul I was going through your transition the other day it was quite a breakthrough, it took you five months from your first religious posting to become an atheist.
grin
The funniest part was when you came out as atheist and kingebukasblog couldn't believe it. He thought it was a joke
grin grin grin
He was like


Interesting shocked grin
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by hopefulLandlord: 11:36am On Feb 04, 2017
urahara:


Interesting shocked grin

Hehehehehehehehe
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by Pastafarian: 8:32am On Mar 05, 2017
hmmm
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by Droldnallufepoh: 5:32am On May 20, 2017
Wolexdey:
Christ can never be ridiculed...You can only ridicule your very self...

its hard ridiculing someone else's imaginary friend
Re: Who Is A True Christian? Let's Ask Some Major Christian Sects by orisa37: 3:22pm On May 20, 2017
Pastafarian:
Let's ask Christian sects how to define Actual Christianity:

Methodist: It is accepting Jesus as your Lord and Savior and publicly sharing that acceptance by getting baptized through sprinkling of water.

Baptist: No, no, no -- you must be DUNKED in water, heathen.

Pentecostal: Yer both wrong -- ye must be baptized by the Holy Spirit and ye must speak in tongues to prove you are saved.

Lutherans: You don't need to do any of that. Our founder said just believe and have faith (oh yeah and he REALLY hated Jews).

Presbyterian: How droll -- lol. No no..you see it does not matter what you do or do not, God has already decided who the true Christians will be and they are obviously all Presbyterians.

Episcopalians: Well, we each get to decide what constitutes Christianity. What is in your heart? What do you think it is for you? What say you, Bishop Spong?

Church of Christ: None of you are going to heaven because you use musical instruments in your services and God hates that.

Jehovah's Witness: Something Something Kingdom Hall; something something no birthdays, several End Times falsely predicted, no blood transfusions,,,,

Seventh Day Adventist: Pah! None of you even have the right day.

United Church of Christ: It's all good; let's listen to an acoustic guitar solo and accept gay people.

Non-denominational: Gay people? ewww. No no, ye must build megachurches with gyms and cafes to be righteous to god.

Catholic: Ummm....oldest sect here, guys. Forget that "accepting Jesus" stuff. You must mediate with God via a priest and eat crackers to get saved (just do not leave your kids alone with said priests, OK?). Oh yeah..and Virgin Mary is way cool.

Church of England: Yeah, what the Catholic said...but divorce is 100% OK.

Unitarian Universalists: Why are you guys even trying to define Christianity? All beliefs are the same (whoops.we aint even Christians).

The Topic is contemptuous.

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