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Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left - Romance (4) - Nairaland

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Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by transient123(m): 5:18pm On May 14, 2017
mmuonso:
Bum bum is a fool, yeah forced marriages should not be accepted, but why wait till the weeding day, eeh kwa ?

That was crass foolishness I swear, why wait till the d-day. She should have met the guy himself and inform him she isn't interested in the whole scam bla bla bla.

Worst case, take a break from people who wouldn't want to give a bleep about her heart desires and resurface after like few weeks.

She is got an ant brain.

1 Like

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Kebreal92(m): 5:19pm On May 14, 2017
dangotesmummy:
abi o.when anything happens won't they tell her to go back to her husband house after all you saw him before you married him

Meanwhile if a man did the exact thing the lady did they'll say maybe it's because her character is not good.

Nigerian culture is so anti women especially in marriage
May GOD help our Women. We treat women in this part of the world like trash. As if they do not have say in issues concerning their own lives.

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Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by omoolorire(m): 5:20pm On May 14, 2017
The lady in question did not get it right. Reason:
She allow the guy to even proposed for unrealistic relationship
She gave the guy impression of her consent by allow introduction to take place.
She was still not convince enough during engagement.
She just allow the guy to waste his resources on kangaroo wedding
Well I don't blame her if what she claimed actually happened but the guy too ought to have seen the red light before wedding day.
I wish the guy good luck in all his future endeavors.
For elders in the house mark my word something is waiting for the girl in future. Pls don't ask question for God sake. Thank you.
Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Ayblaize(m): 5:22pm On May 14, 2017
coolesmile:
Her Twitter handle is Bum Bum. What do you expect? I hope bum bum is married now, or is she still waiting for the perfect man? tongue

But that girl bum bum set o. if na her pic be dat grin.

1 Like

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by dangotesmummy: 5:23pm On May 14, 2017
Antichristus:
A fool at 30 is forever a fool. You didn't want to marry him and you played along to the very last minute under the guise of being pushed or coerced? You should have stood your ground from the word go. Right to marriage (whoever one wishes) is a fundamental human right under international human rights law. Now, any sensible potential suitor should simply walk past you because you could still change your mind after saying "I do."
are you serious ? So she doesn't have a right to change her mind at anytime? Isn't it her marriage? Isn't she the one that will live with him?

Why do society like sticking their nose into other peoples business and be forming unnecessary itk.even the one the husband is beating blue black at home will come and be forming marriage counsellor
Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Jaabioro(m): 5:24pm On May 14, 2017
I would be happy if Bunmi Bum Bum can read the reaction on nairaland including mine useless comment to you as you have make mock of that your special day.. @30 you're still locking around, you can take your stand within 30 to 90 days.. at 30 I am a father already.. Let's see who will give you such opportunity again..
Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by dangotesmummy: 5:25pm On May 14, 2017
omoolorire:
The lady in question did not get it right. Reason:
She allow the guy to even proposed for unrealistic relationship
She gave the guy impression of her consent by allow introduction to take place.
She was still not convince enough during engagement.
She just allow the guy to waste his resources on kangaroo wedding
Well I don't blame her if what she claimed actually happened but the guy too ought to have seen the red light before wedding day.
I wish the guy good luck in all his future endeavors.
For elders in the house mark my word something is waiting for the girl in future. Pls don't ask question for God sake. Thank you.
I am an elder.what's waiting for her? tongue grin
Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by hush15: 5:25pm On May 14, 2017
ShawttySoFyne:
No one should ever be forced into an unloving marriage



While I believe anybody shouldn't be forced into any marriage, I still believe it's wrong what she did. This only happens when you don't know what you want cos it didn't have to get to the wedding day before you cancelled.a day before would still be perfect, not when everyone is already at the wedding and you decided not to show up. It's a very embarrassing position. She thought of herself alone but not the guy who believed he was about have a wife. It's a very devastating position for the guy. The humiliation is deep.

Anyway, after all said and done, it's come and gone and I pray when she is ready, it won't be one good for nothing fella she will now be tripping for and that one will now abuse her and we will begin to hear men are wicked stories because many ladies don't understand that when it comes to marriage, it takes more than love. It's not a factor but a result of marriage.
If you can agreed to date the guy, then you can grow to love the guy.

Well for the guy if he gets to read this, like Iyanya rightly sang, wetin be your own be your own and if it is not your own, just leave it alone. Don't be upset, just move on and try to love the next person better. It best that way cos if you had married her, who knows you might be provoked to the extent you can kill her sef but ,God saved you from big trauma

2 Likes

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Fkforyou(m): 5:28pm On May 14, 2017
dangotesmummy:
the reason the father is angry is because of the money he has spent for the wedding and the embarrassment it will cause him. Same applies to the mother. No opportunity to show off to her friends and her family. It's like you don't know the way African families are. They do things for their own parochial reasons and make it look like it's for the family

Well, you have a point, but I'm more concerned about her actions, he indecisiveness has caused someone his happiness. She was thirty and I don't believe someone her age could be coerced into making certain decisions especially if it has to do with her future.

Having said that, I guess we are all selfish to some extent when it comes to choosing between our own happiness and someone else's. So I won't blame her entirely.
Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by dangotesmummy: 5:29pm On May 14, 2017
Kebreal92:

May GOD help our Women. We treat women in this part of the world like trash. As if they do not have say in issues concerning their own lives.
in Nigeria any woman that makes her own decision is tagged rebellious and not submissive

1 Like

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Nobody: 5:31pm On May 14, 2017
Ayanfeoluwaoba:
This is one of the best response so far.

Marriage is meant to be enjoyed and not endured, why will you force me to marry a person I dont see a future with?

My Parent once told me it's a must I marry from their town and I asked them, what if fate brings me to someone from another place? In response, grandma said it will not hold, I then asked her a question that "How many more years do you have to live, that you want to decide for me?" Mumsy went like never....and I said I will do their wish only if they are ready to perform all the "wifery" duty. Nobody taught them to back off.

It's the happiness in Marriage that matters not the many many preaching.


You are one brave young woman. Parents almost always believe that they know better, that their advice is the best, that they have better experience after years of practical approach to life. But what they have failed to notice is that Times Have Changed. Social media and other universe of ideas are on now available. People no longer want a 9-5 job to be successful. And women no longer accept the idea of being ruled over by men, especially if the man in question is more ignorant, less educated or even "make-I-Hurriedly-marry-My-time-don-dey go" category. I have personally accepted the fate of the world, that 50 years from now, marriage, as it is practiced now will NOT exist. Common law marriages with 7 years renewable contract will become popular and a lot of people will not even want to get married in the first place, so, what is all this noise about leaving the alter. Marriage these days is just an overrated financial wastage re-packaged to 'fulfill traditional expectation of the society'.

The Lady did right.

3 Likes

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Antichristus: 5:34pm On May 14, 2017
dangotesmummy:
are you serious ? So she doesn't have a right to change her mind at anytime? Isn't it her marriage? Isn't she the one that will live with him?

Why do society like sticking their nose into other peoples business and be forming unnecessary itk.even the one the husband is beating blue black at home will come and be forming marriage counsellor

WHICH SCHOOL DID YOU GO TO AND WHO WAS YOUR ENGLISH TEACHER. JUST CURIOUS TO KNOW. TAKE ANOTHER LOOK AT MY RESPONSE AND DECIDE IF YOUR QUESTION IS STILL PERTINENT. TO PUT IT IN ANOTHER WAY:

P1=FROM DAY 1 SHE NEVER WANTED TO MARRY THE GUY;
P2=FROM DAY 1 SHE SHOULD HAVE STOOD HER GROUND BECAUSE SHE HAS A RIGHT TO DO SO;
P3=EVERYONE WOULD HAVE BACKED DOWN OTHERWISE THEY WOULD BE VIOLATING HER FUNDAMENTAL RIGHT;
C =THE SAD EVENT OF THAT DAY WOULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED AND THE WHOLE WORLD WOULD RESPECT HER STAND.


DO YOU STILL NEED A TRANSLATOR

1 Like

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by HARDDON: 5:40pm On May 14, 2017
Cordis92:
It's really pathetic imaging what that young man went through after that day, but I pray he finds a woman who will love him and be his wife. Every disappointment is a blessing. The lady saved him from unhappy marriage or future divorce.

Lesson to people who like recommended marriage, please ask the person if he or she really loves you and is ready to take the walk with you. Ask well o

I won't judge the lady. She is old enough to know what she wants. I pray God helps her in her life journey.

Like others said, she shouldnt have waited that long , wasted the guy's time , efforts n money b4 calling it off!
And d big embarrassment?

Been in Church with officiating Minister n invitees waiting for some bride n been told ova d phone that bride has changed her mind! Da fuq!!!!??

What happens to d money spent on fud, arrangemrnts n all other bleeping ish!!!! ?


SHe is mos def a Devil. But luckily, for once, the devil did a right tin even if it was left So late. Itz beta to have broken it now dan frustrate d guy's life later

1 Like

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Antichristus: 5:42pm On May 14, 2017
Billyonaire:


You are one brave young woman. Parents almost always believe that they know better, that their advice is the best, that they have better experience after years of practical approach to life. But what they have failed to notice is that Times Have Changed. Social media and other universe of ideas are on now available. People no longer want a 9-5 job to be successful. And women no longer accept the idea of being ruled over by men, especially if the man in question is more ignorant, less educated or even "make-I-Hurriedly-marry-My-time-don-dey go" category. I have personally accepted the fate of the world, that 50 years from now, marriage, as it is practiced now will NOT exist. Common law marriages with 7 years renewable contract will become popular and a lot of people will not even want to get married in the first place, so, what is all this noise about leaving the alter. Marriage these days is just an overrated financial wastage re-packaged to 'fulfill traditional expectation of the society'.

The Lady did right.


YOU WERE RIGHT UNTIL THE VERY LAST STATEMENT. WHAT YOU DESCRIBE IS ALREADY THE CASE IN EUROPE AND THE AMERICAS - NORTH AND SOUTH.

MY DISAGREEMENT WITH YOU IS THE CONCLUSION DRAWN. THIS GIRL SHOULD HAVE BLUNTLY INSISTED SHE'S NOT MARRYING THAT GUY AND THAT ANYONE DOING/SAYING/PLANNING ANYTHING TO THE CONTRARY IS SIMPLY WASTING THEIR TIME.
Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by terrezo2002(m): 5:43pm On May 14, 2017
Nweike1:
God bless you sir
Amen and you too
Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Nobody: 5:46pm On May 14, 2017
Antichristus:



YOU WERE RIGHT UNTIL THE VERY LAST STATEMENT. WHAT YOU DESCRIBE IS ALREADY THE CASE IN EUROPE AND THE AMERICAS - NORTH AND SOUTH.

MY DISAGREEMENT WITH YOU IS THE CONCLUSION DRAWN. THIS GIRL SHOULD HAVE BLUNTLY INSISTED SHE'S NOT MARRYING THAT GUY AND THAT ANYONE DOING/SAYING/PLANNING ANYTHING TO THE CONTRARY IS SIMPLY WASTING THEIR TIME.

We disagree to agree.
Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by hush15: 5:46pm On May 14, 2017
dangotesmummy:
are you serious ? So she doesn't have a right to change her mind at anytime? Isn't it her marriage? Isn't she the one that will live with him?

Why do society like sticking their nose into other peoples business and be forming unnecessary itk.even the one the husband is beating blue black at home will come and be forming marriage counsellor

Common, someone that left someone at the alter already invited the society into her private life already because all those guests and friends will talk bout it forever. More so, when everybody seen to have forgotten, she took to twitter to start explaining what should have left alone and invited the society again to come feast on her issue. Even she can't get over her actions. That one aside,

Now about what she did, whether is wrong or not, only God knows best because here all I can see is that she will pose a very big problem for the guy in the marriage because rather than focus on her marriage and build her family, she will be distracted and complain every time. After all, she wasn't into it anyway but cos her family had a say, she went ahead. Probably cheat on the guy eventually sef.

However, she could still have cancelled the wedding a day to the wedding not on the wedding day. Cos that pressure didn't come on the wedding day. There is a build up already and while planning everything, am very sure she would have asked herself if this is really what she wanted. It's not like she didn't like the guy, she just wasn't sure whether she could pull through. And when it seems she can't, should have just saved the guy the huge embarrassment even if if it the day before.

Me, I believe that there is more to it and am sure she has interest in another but can't come out clean yet and besides, can't introduce since the parents are upset already. It's a question of time.

2 Likes

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Cordis92(f): 5:54pm On May 14, 2017
Do you know how many times they met or spoke? Do you know how many times she refused it but people told her it would be fine that love grows? Like I said before, I won't judge or condemn anybody because I was not there and even if I was there, I still do not have that right.

HARDDON:


Like others said, she shouldnt have waited that long , wasted the guy's time , efforts n money b4 calling it off!
And d big embarrassment?

Been in Church with officiating Minister n invitees waiting for some bride n been told ova d phone that bride has changed her mind! Da fuq!!!!??

What happens to d money spent on fud, arrangemrnts n all other bleeping ish!!!! ?


SHe is mos def a Devil. But luckily, for once, the devil did a right tin even if it was left So late. Itz beta to have broken it now dan frustrate d guy's life later

2 Likes

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by dangotesmummy: 5:57pm On May 14, 2017
Antichristus:


WHICH SCHOOL DID YOU GO TO AND WHO WAS YOUR ENGLISH TEACHER. JUST CURIOUS TO KNOW. TAKE ANOTHER LOOK AT MY RESPONSE AND DECIDE IF YOUR QUESTION IS STILL PERTINENT. TO PUT IT IN ANOTHER WAY:

P1=FROM DAY 1 SHE NEVER WANTED TO MARRY THE GUY;
P2=FROM DAY 1 SHE SHOULD HAVE STOOD HER GROUND BECAUSE SHE HAS A RIGHT TO DO SO;
P3=EVERYONE WOULD HAVE BACKED DOWN OTHERWISE THEY WOULD BE VIOLATING HER FUNDAMENTAL RIGHT;
C =THE SAD EVENT OF THAT DAY WOULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED AND THE WHOLE WORLD WOULD RESPECT HER STAND.


DO YOU STILL NEED A TRANSLATOR
it's you that has comprehension issues

Didn't you read where she wrote that when the guy proposed to her,they forced/pressurized her to say yes because he has a job,he's this and that so what's your problem? Meanwhile they didn't give the girl space to make her own decision, she was in between, pressurized, confused,contemplating and then on the day of her wedding that was when she made her final decision

its like you don't know or pretend not to know or just being an alabosi aka hypocrite to know how Nigerian family operates when they have a daughter of 30 and she's still at home,once they sight any man near her,they won't even give her breathing space to make her own decision and weigh things. They'll all be all up in her business and use emotional manipulation, insults and shades to push her into marriage even when she's not sure she loves the man.all they're after is wedding ceremony without putting the girl's feeling into consideration.

The girl has a right to choice AT ANY TIME.after all she's not a baby. Nigerian Families will learn next time to let things take their natural course and stop forcing and throwing their daughters into any man as if her feelings are irrelevant

1 Like

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by dangotesmummy: 5:58pm On May 14, 2017
Cordis92:
Do you know how many times they met or spoke? Do you know how many times she refused it but people told her it would be fine that love grows? Like I said before, I won't judge or condemn anybody because I was not there and even if I was there, I still do not have that right.

gbam
Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Nobody: 5:59pm On May 14, 2017
Very bad of you bunmi.. Heaven sef can't be happy with you, what you did is enough for that man to commit suicide! He proposed to you, engaged you and you agree! You shouldn't have agreed atleast he will know his stand. Go to God in prayer and ask for forgiveness! Ask the man also to forgive you because you've not offended only him you offended his creator.
Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Dynamite02: 6:00pm On May 14, 2017
PaulSteve:
She should have ended it earlier but no,she kept pushing till wedding day before 'embarrassing everyone'. Well better late than never!
From her story she did not push,but her loved ones kept pushing her..pressuring her against her own desire...they must have trapped and choked her with their nagging leaving her with no choice,for someone still depending on her parents it must have been hell for her. Generally people will judge the aftermath but not the journey itself

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by nairaman66(m): 6:02pm On May 14, 2017
vantage001:
Am i the only to notice that ladies bearing bunmi actually have decent ''bum-bum''.
I dated one sometime ago and she had a humongous as$. Yoruba people should clarify this.

Busola usually have a nice ass too! grin

Maybe has something to do with the B!! Maybe B means plent Bum Bum!

1 Like

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Bondesniger(m): 6:07pm On May 14, 2017
too bad
you should have known that from the word
you not have dated him for a day
Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by dangotesmummy: 6:07pm On May 14, 2017
hush15:


Common, someone that left someone at the alter already invited the society into her private life already because all those guests and friends will talk bout it forever. More so, when everybody seen to have forgotten, she took to twitter to start explaining what should have left alone and invited the society again to come feast on her issue. Even she can't get over her actions. That one aside,

Now about what she did, whether is wrong or not, only God knows best because here all I can see is that she will pose a very big problem for the guy in the marriage because rather than focus on her marriage and build her family, she will be distracted and complain every time. After all, she wasn't into it anyway but cos her family had a say, she went ahead. Probably cheat on the guy eventually sef.

However, she could still have cancelled the wedding a day to the wedding not on the wedding day. Cos that pressure didn't come on the wedding day. There is a build up already and while planning everything, am very sure she would have asked herself if this is really what she wanted. It's not like she didn't like the guy, she just wasn't sure whether she could pull through. And when it seems she can't, should have just saved the guy the huge embarrassment even if if it the day before.

Me, I believe that there is more to it and am sure she has interest in another but can't come out clean yet and besides, can't introduce since the parents are upset already. It's a question of time.


is it by force for a woman to marry someone she doesn't love just because she's 30 for goodness sake.take it or live it Nigerian parents and families can be pushy overbearing and domineering. All the while they were courting to the time they were planning wedding, the girl's family didn't see the handwriting on the wall.all they were concerned with is how they'll show off and slay at their daughters wedding. All they're after is I will invite governor this, senator that to chair the wedding

The family of the girl are unreasonable people, they're not after the girl's well being, it's all about the ceremony aka karimi for them. If they were after her happiness they should have asked her are you sure you want to marry this man when he proposed instead of saying say yes.they should have asked do you feel happy with him,do you love him? These are questions the family should be bothered about
Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by dangotesmummy: 6:09pm On May 14, 2017
Dynamite02:

From her story she did not push,but her loved ones kept pushing her..pressuring her against her own desire...they must have trapped and choked her with their nagging leaving her with no choice,for someone still depending on her parents it must have been hell for her. Generally people will judge the aftermath but not the journey itself
exactly my point thank you

1 Like

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by luswitz(f): 6:09pm On May 14, 2017
H
talk2alabama:
Ok.. Bravo.. I hope she isn't living with her parents still.. Because if na me.. Na pursue I go pursue her comot from my house
common stop talking out of ignorance. Its not by force to get married, everyone has d right to talk from a relationship if they arent happy. Its her life, who are you to judge?

1 Like 2 Shares

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by luswitz(f): 6:10pm On May 14, 2017
ShawttySoFyne:
No one should ever be forced into an unloving marriage
so true.. its a good thing she put an end to it bfor it was too late. Happiness should be a priority.

1 Like 2 Shares

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Antichristus: 6:12pm On May 14, 2017
NO MATTER THE PRESSURE, SHE SHOULD HAVE FLATLY REFUSED.

1 Like

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by bobolistica(m): 6:13pm On May 14, 2017
u guys shouldn't judge her.she has rights to happiness.its her life...u don't expect someone to get married to someone she or he does not love.
i pity d groom though...

1 Like

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by Nobody: 6:18pm On May 14, 2017
ShawttySoFyne:
No one should ever be forced into an unloving marriage



Am telling you!
Its like death sentence .
Phew! Such horrible parents angry

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Lady Who Abandoned Her Fiance At The Altar In 2015 Finally Explains Why She Left by dangotesmummy: 6:21pm On May 14, 2017
Tosinex:
Very bad of you bunmi.. Heaven sef can't be happy with you, what you did is enough for that man to commit suicide! He proposed to you, engaged you and you agree! You shouldn't have agreed atleast he will know his stand. Go to God in prayer and ask for forgiveness! Ask the man also to forgive you because you've not offended only him you offended his creator.
ask God for forgiveness for taking her destiny into her own hands,ask God for forgiveness because she doesn't have power of choice, ask God for forgiveness because it's no longer her life.

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