She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? - Family (2)

She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by cococandy(f): 7:38am On Jul 22, 2017

Nerdg:
Did you read the part I said all our break-ups were because she refused sex with me. Why do she do this? My problem is why we had issues because of sex and she's getting it somewhere else?

Well Maybe she wasn't sexually interested in you then.

Don't take it personally.

I know some Guys have a hard time accepting no for answer.

Questions is: Did she get pregnant while dating you or was it in between one of your break ups? If it was during the time she was actively dating you, that means she cheated on you like you cheated on her with her neighbor. Meh. Goose. Gander. End of story. Sorry sha.

However if she got pregnant during one of the times when you guys were broken up, I don't see what the problem is.
Except that you can't imagine why she would want to fvck someone else but say no to you. Well news flash: Sexual attraction is a weird thing. Maybe she didn't have the hots for you then but she does now. Just enjoy the moment

13 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Sterope(f): 7:38am On Jul 22, 2017

Hypocrite

Nerdg:
Don't say what you don't know, I asked for advice and not your Masturbation on the thread

7 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Nerdg(op): 7:40am On Jul 22, 2017

Sterope:
Hypocrite

Thanks

4 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Sterope(f): 7:43am On Jul 22, 2017

You are welcome

Nerdg:
Thanks

6 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by snowlord(m): 8:21am On Jul 22, 2017

Op Dnt B Dcvd,she Doznt Lov U...Dnt Marry,she Bn Wt Oda Guys Bt Wont Wt U . To her u just a back up,she wil evn reveal more 1c u r married.n blv me u wont b able to deal,dhz more to marriage dan jex lov,doh lov is a nec. part

20 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by madridguy(m): 8:25am On Jul 22, 2017

Well, you know what is good for you as per marrying her.

Nerdg:
I don't think she's trying to test me

My worry is why she had always refused me sex whereas she's this exposed. Could it be because of this she accepted my proposal?

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by jchioma: 8:28am On Jul 22, 2017

You should even be grateful that she opened up to you... Some ladies will rather hide it from you. Do you love her, as in someone you will want to spend your remaining life with? Then marry her. Look at things from the bright side. Everyone has a 'dark' past.

2 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by alex81(m): 8:31am On Jul 22, 2017

how did I get here....

5 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by teresafaith: 8:49am On Jul 22, 2017

Op has already made a decision and he is looking for who will pat him on the back and encourage him to dump her, but lemme tell you the bitter truth "YOU AN HYPOCRITE"

Well your fellow morons are cheering you on, but know that what we sow is what we will reap

11 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Nerdg(op): 8:54am On Jul 22, 2017

teresafaith:
Op has already made a decision and he is looking for who will pat him on the back and encourage him to dump her, but lemme tell you the bitter truth "YOU AN HYPOCRITE"

Well your fellow morons are cheering you on, but know that what we sow is what we will reap

You're capturing the part you like. However, I wish you can understand the theme rather than a paragraph. Let me help, we had many break-ups only because I tried to have sex with her. Meanwhile she's already sexually active. That's the problem not the stillbirth

34 Likes 2 Shares

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by enigmatic741: 9:02am On Jul 22, 2017

Nerdg:
Don't say what you don't know, I asked for advice and not your Masturbation on the thread

Honestly OP, #IMO..I think the only reason she told you the supposed dark secret is because of what you shared (your own secret) as well. She felt comfortable telling you that since she now feels confident based on what you told her...If you didn't tell her yours.. The odds are in your favor that she won't tell you hers as well...She'll feel guilty..

3 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by enigmatic741: 9:08am On Jul 22, 2017

Nerdg:
You're capturing the part you like. However, I wish you can understand the theme rather than a paragraph. Let me help, we had many break-ups only because I tried to have sex with her. Meanwhile she's already sexually active. That's the problem not the stillbirth

To be quite blunt, for someone like me.. I'll end it at the moment..Not because of her story particularly, but because she turned me down, while sleeping with others..If probably have slept with her already and we broke up and that happened while we weren't together...I might forgive her..But she instilled a misguided personality of herself..That I can't let go..

47 Likes 2 Shares

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by wristbangle: 9:19am On Jul 22, 2017*

I don't know why you are reflecting on the past, though it hurts your feelings was hurt towards non sex relationship thing which I know u are being careful not to make a mistake with severe consequences later in your marriage.

Both of you have shared your dark secrets and you must let go if you truly want to spend the rest of your life with the lady.

1 Like

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by free2ryhme: 9:20am On Jul 22, 2017

Nerdg:
She told me of being pregnant and later had a stillbirth at the 7months.

The background.
I met her when we were teens and have always loved her. She refused me sex and along the line, her neighbor gave me (who is her relation). She learnt about this and we had our first break up.
We both got admission into different universities and couldn't see again.
We later met again and settled with a condition that there would be no sex. This didn't go down well with me and I called it off. This repeated and there was even a time I walked her out of my house because of this issue and didn't give her tfare. My house is like 1hr drive from where she lives.
The issue:
I love this girl to the extent that anytime I thought of getting married, she will come to mind.
Now I have a good job and she's done with school. I proposed to her and she accepted it.
Is about 3 months now, she came on my birthday 3 months ago. That was all. She doesn't come always because she stays with her elder brother and can't leave house just like that.

Note, we haven't had sex till now.

About 2 weeks ago, I told her about how I got a girl pregnant and we had to abort it and that since then I haven't been myself. That it pains me to this day. We talked about it and she was sorry over it.

Yesterday, we had a very deep discussion and she revealed to me that she had a relationship at school. They were together for 4yrs. I then asked her if she had ever missed her period. She said yes. But not to this school boyfriend but another man. She wanted to keep the pregnancy but her parents refused because the guy is not a good person. The guy wanted the pregnancy but her family didn't want the guy to marry her. She finally had a stillbirth at the 7th month.

I was stunned. I know she's not a virgin, she told me but I was confused. Sex had always been our problem and I never expected that she had experienced something like this. Now she asked me that she hope she won't regret telling me this. I told her no that she won't regret but I'm stunned.

Please should I still go on with this marriage?

Make una stop to dey lie for these children

1 Like

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by 1miccza: 9:23am On Jul 22, 2017

Bros the score na 1:1 you are both even let her be and look out for the good in her.

1 Like

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Nobody: 9:24am On Jul 22, 2017

[color=Teal]You're very silly. You fuçked her relation, got another girl pregnant and made the girl to abort for you, broke up with your girl severally because she didn't want to satisfy your dirty urges, basically treated her like shît. Now she was honest enough to tell you her own little secret which is very mild compared to what you've done.
In all honesty, you don't deserve that girl. Go and look for someone in the same category as slime as you.[/color]

22 Likes 2 Shares

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by ibkayee(f): 9:25am On Jul 22, 2017

If she didn't cheat on you I don't get what the big deal is

3 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by joewinson: 9:25am On Jul 22, 2017

Nerdg:
She told me of being pregnant and later had a stillbirth at the 7months.

The background.
I met her when we were teens and have always loved her. She refused me sex and along the line, her neighbor gave me (who is her relation). She learnt about this and we had our first break up.
We both got admission into different universities and couldn't see again.
We later met again and settled with a condition that there would be no sex. This didn't go down well with me and I called it off. This repeated and there was even a time I walked her out of my house because of this issue and didn't give her tfare. My house is like 1hr drive from where she lives.
The issue:
I love this girl to the extent that anytime I thought of getting married, she will come to mind.
Now I have a good job and she's done with school. I proposed to her and she accepted it.
Is about 3 months now, she came on my birthday 3 months ago. That was all. She doesn't come always because she stays with her elder brother and can't leave house just like that.

Note, we haven't had sex till now.

About 2 weeks ago, I told her about how I got a girl pregnant and we had to abort it and that since then I haven't been myself. That it pains me to this day. We talked about it and she was sorry over it.

Yesterday, we had a very deep discussion and she revealed to me that she had a relationship at school. They were together for 4yrs. I then asked her if she had ever missed her period. She said yes. But not to this school boyfriend but another man. She wanted to keep the pregnancy but her parents refused because the guy is not a good person. The guy wanted the pregnancy but her family didn't want the guy to marry her. She finally had a stillbirth at the 7th month.

I was stunned. I know she's not a virgin, she told me but I was confused. Sex had always been our problem and I never expected that she had experienced something like this. Now she asked me that she hope she won't regret telling me this. I told her no that she won't regret but I'm stunned.

Please should I still go on with this marriage?

That relationship is not just for you, not to talk of marriage! How will a girlfriend refuse to have sex with you and she's getting it elsewhere! Brother think with your head and stop following that emotion rush

19 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Apina(m): 9:26am On Jul 22, 2017*

Though sex isn't the basis for which a relationship should be built on but the truth is, from ur and her narrative, she dated u twice before this time and didn't consider u good enough to share any form of intimate bond with but was willing to distribute her common wealth to others and even ended up losing a pregnancy for another man along the way. Whenever u think about marriage, she comes to mind for you, but can the same be said about her? I think u are just having a hangover from ur teenage love affair and nothing more. She knows she has a grip on you and that's why she doesn't feel threatened by any action you take cos deep within you are bound to run back to her.

11 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Kobicove(m): 9:26am On Jul 22, 2017

I don't see any issue here?

How many ladies have not been pregnant before marriage?

Pls go ahead and marry her if there are no other serious issues

2 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Nobody: 9:27am On Jul 22, 2017

As dark as chocolate huh

1 Like

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Dumbae13: 9:27am On Jul 22, 2017

I told my fiancee that I got pregnant in school for my bf then we both wanted to keep it, he was working just doing MSC in my school when I met him,but I had a miscarriage due to using bike to meet up with lectures and all, i regretted telling him,anyways its good you guys are opening up to yourselves for me its Not a topic

1 Like

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Nobody: 9:28am On Jul 22, 2017

Wallahi that's why I hate women atimes,when you dey break head for them dey off for them,dem no go reason you but as soon as another homeboy toast dem mumu go off pant ,after so many years when you don dey rassle her oh,the guy go just fvck her less than one week you go wan mad,na when the toto don rust dem go dust your chapter still kon dey insist on no sex until marriage with you dey claim bad experience..tah thunder dia anofia

31 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Okies27(m): 9:28am On Jul 22, 2017

Nerdg:
She told me of being pregnant and later had a stillbirth at the 7months.

The background.
I met her when we were teens and have always loved her. She refused me sex and along the line, her neighbor gave me (who is her relation). She learnt about this and we had our first break up.
We both got admission into different universities and couldn't see again.
We later met again and settled with a condition that there would be no sex. This didn't go down well with me and I called it off. This repeated and there was even a time I walked her out of my house because of this issue and didn't give her tfare. My house is like 1hr drive from where she lives.
The issue:
I love this girl to the extent that anytime I thought of getting married, she will come to mind.
Now I have a good job and she's done with school. I proposed to her and she accepted it.
Is about 3 months now, she came on my birthday 3 months ago. That was all. She doesn't come always because she stays with her elder brother and can't leave house just like that.

Note, we haven't had sex till now.

About 2 weeks ago, I told her about how I got a girl pregnant and we had to abort it and that since then I haven't been myself. That it pains me to this day. We talked about it and she was sorry over it.

Yesterday, we had a very deep discussion and she revealed to me that she had a relationship at school. They were together for 4yrs. I then asked her if she had ever missed her period. She said yes. But not to this school boyfriend but another man. She wanted to keep the pregnancy but her parents refused because the guy is not a good person. The guy wanted the pregnancy but her family didn't want the guy to marry her. She finally had a stillbirth at the 7th month.

I was stunned. I know she's not a virgin, she told me but I was confused. Sex had always been our problem and I never expected that she had experienced something like this. Now she asked me that she hope she won't regret telling me this. I told her no that she won't regret but I'm stunned.

Please should I still go on with this marriage?

. If a girl refuses to have sex with me and she's not a virgin, brotherly, problem go dey o. If she doesn't do it with someone else, then, I will be cool but if she comes with this kind of your story, truth, my mind go comot.

24 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by yahmohy27: 9:29am On Jul 22, 2017

whitebeard:
Op u also aborted a pregnancy, abeg both of u are the same, I don't know if u should marry but the way u guys are revealing secrets to yourselves is also a good sign.

That's all

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Nobody: 9:29am On Jul 22, 2017

joewinson:
That relationship is not just for you, not to talk of marriage! How will a girlfriend refuse to have sex with you and she's getting it elsewhere! Brother think with your head and stop following that emotion rush

hush... Y use the present tense like she's cheating on him? I'm sure it happened before she met op. Hypocrite

1 Like

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Lexusgs430: 9:29am On Jul 22, 2017*

Nerdg:
She told me of being pregnant and later had a stillbirth at the 7months.

The background.
I met her when we were teens and have always loved her. She refused me sex and along the line, her neighbor gave me (who is her relation). She learnt about this and we had our first break up.
We both got admission into different universities and couldn't see again.
We later met again and settled with a condition that there would be no sex. This didn't go down well with me and I called it off. This repeated and there was even a time I walked her out of my house because of this issue and didn't give her tfare. My house is like 1hr drive from where she lives.
The issue:
I love this girl to the extent that anytime I thought of getting married, she will come to mind.
Now I have a good job and she's done with school. I proposed to her and she accepted it.
Is about 3 months now, she came on my birthday 3 months ago. That was all. She doesn't come always because she stays with her elder brother and can't leave house just like that.

Note, we haven't had sex till now.

About 2 weeks ago, I told her about how I got a girl pregnant and we had to abort it and that since then I haven't been myself. That it pains me to this day. We talked about it and she was sorry over it.

Yesterday, we had a very deep discussion and she revealed to me that she had a relationship at school. They were together for 4yrs. I then asked her if she had ever missed her period. She said yes. But not to this school boyfriend but another man. She wanted to keep the pregnancy but her parents refused because the guy is not a good person. The guy wanted the pregnancy but her family didn't want the guy to marry her. She finally had a stillbirth at the 7th month.

I was stunned. I know she's not a virgin, she told me but I was confused. Sex had always been our problem and I never expected that she had experienced something like this. Now she asked me that she hope she won't regret telling me this. I told her no that she won't regret but I'm stunned.

Please should I still go on with this marriage?

You got a girl pregnant, that aborted it. And she had a stillbirth.
The main question is, while depriving you of sex. Was she having with another?
And if she wasn't, she probably needs counselling or therapy, because of her traumatised still birth experience......

2 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by verygudbadguy(m): 9:29am On Jul 22, 2017*

obyrich:
Don't mind the OP. The babe is a manipulator and he can't see it because of love. Once he pricks her now reality will dawn on him.

Common guys, marriage is not always the way we see it. I see the babe as someone with conscience. She could have kept those secrets to herself but she z quite aware that secretes are burdens and she laid them before you.
Be realistic, if you get to know about these things after she had given birth to one or two, would you quit the marriage or kill yourself Nerdg? She is trying to change the future even if she could not change the past.

Cc: Decatalyst

5 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by hollowpot15684(m): 9:30am On Jul 22, 2017

Nerdg:
She told me of being pregnant and later had a stillbirth at the 7months.

The background.
I met her when we were teens and have always loved her. She refused me sex and along the line, her neighbor gave me (who is her relation). She learnt about this and we had our first break up.
We both got admission into different universities and couldn't see again.
We later met again and settled with a condition that there would be no sex. This didn't go down well with me and I called it off. This repeated and there was even a time I walked her out of my house because of this issue and didn't give her tfare. My house is like 1hr drive from where she lives.
The issue:
I love this girl to the extent that anytime I thought of getting married, she will come to mind.
Now I have a good job and she's done with school. I proposed to her and she accepted it.
Is about 3 months now, she came on my birthday 3 months ago. That was all. She doesn't come always because she stays with her elder brother and can't leave house just like that.

Note, we haven't had sex till now.

About 2 weeks ago, I told her about how I got a girl pregnant and we had to abort it and that since then I haven't been myself. That it pains me to this day. We talked about it and she was sorry over it.

Yesterday, we had a very deep discussion and she revealed to me that she had a relationship at school. They were together for 4yrs. I then asked her if she had ever missed her period. She said yes. But not to this school boyfriend but another man. She wanted to keep the pregnancy but her parents refused because the guy is not a good person. The guy wanted the pregnancy but her family didn't want the guy to marry her. She finally had a stillbirth at the 7th month.

I was stunned. I know she's not a virgin, she told me but I was confused. Sex had always been our problem and I never expected that she had experienced something like this. Now she asked me that she hope she won't regret telling me this. I told her no that she won't regret but I'm stunned.

Please should I still go on with this marriage?

Man, what exactly are you scared of?

4 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by wakes: 9:30am On Jul 22, 2017

Sad

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Sunmolar(m): 9:30am On Jul 22, 2017

Nerdg:
She told me of being pregnant and later had a stillbirth at the 7months.

The background.
I met her when we were teens and have always loved her. She refused me sex and along the line, her neighbor gave me (who is her relation). She learnt about this and we had our first break up.
We both got admission into different universities and couldn't see again.
We later met again and settled with a condition that there would be no sex. This didn't go down well with me and I called it off. This repeated and there was even a time I walked her out of my house because of this issue and didn't give her tfare. My house is like 1hr drive from where she lives.
The issue:
I love this girl to the extent that anytime I thought of getting married, she will come to mind.
Now I have a good job and she's done with school. I proposed to her and she accepted it.
Is about 3 months now, she came on my birthday 3 months ago. That was all. She doesn't come always because she stays with her elder brother and can't leave house just like that.

Note, we haven't had sex till now.

About 2 weeks ago, I told her about how I got a girl pregnant and we had to abort it and that since then I haven't been myself. That it pains me to this day. We talked about it and she was sorry over it.

Yesterday, we had a very deep discussion and she revealed to me that she had a relationship at school. They were together for 4yrs. I then asked her if she had ever missed her period. She said yes. But not to this school boyfriend but another man. She wanted to keep the pregnancy but her parents refused because the guy is not a good person. The guy wanted the pregnancy but her family didn't want the guy to marry her. She finally had a stillbirth at the 7th month.

I was stunned. I know she's not a virgin, she told me but I was confused. Sex had always been our problem and I never expected that she had experienced something like this. Now she asked me that she hope she won't regret telling me this. I told her no that she won't regret but I'm stunned.

Please should I still go on with this marriage?

you're a lucky man. thank God she revealed it to your. ladies know how to conceived/concealed things till after marriage/eternity. you
're a man make your choice that you wouldn't av to regret after marriage, because marriage itself is another thing you will bear Til eternity. listen to your inner mind & pray before you choose. when you see the rightest one you will av inner peace as an evidence. not the beauty

3 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by AntiWailer: 9:31am On Jul 22, 2017*

Leave her alone.

You are lucky she told you.

I met a wonderful sister of God back then. We were talking about secrets and relationship.

She told me it is not wise for a lady to tell a guy any past.

That she has lost a lot of potential suitors cos of her body count that is over 150. (Yes u heard me right) she wrote their names.

She is married now. The guy she married she told me she lied to him that she was raped twice and that was all.

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