₦airaland Forum

Duru009:
Maybe m case is different.

98% of m friends are ladies. In fact, in my department were I work am d guy dre with ova ten beautiful ladies. I flow with them smoothly.
I prefer ladies to friends then guys!!

Are you fuckin for real?

olaboy1:
Where u got it all wrong is that the friendship been discussed here is one that shouldn't end in marriage, we are talking about girls in a committed relationship already, so you need to do a better survey with the right samples.

Those mentioned know where we are coming from okay? If you really took time to read what I wrote you'll see that I deviated a bit from the topic. Thanks for your contribution anyways

nuelyoyo:
Guy, you are so right, back then In my undergraduate days, there is this gal in my school, we knew thru her male cousin who was my friend in Lag. When I met her in person, I was wowed by her beauty. But I sized her up and knew that if I make a move on her it won't work. I knew it would be more beneficial to have her as a friend rather than loose her in any attempt of wooing her. We became good friends from 100 level till we graduated and continued the friendship in Lag. It was NYSC that set us apart, and after my NYSC, I relocated to Abj. We still communicated once in a while till she got married to a dude outside Nigeria and she left the country. All through our years of friendship, it never crossed my mind to have s*x with her. We both confide in each other and she told me deep secrets about herself. I think this whole debate just boils down to individual differences and mindset. Many pple who have commented on this thread did so based on their experiences, wether personal or observed.

Go back and read what you just posted, pay attention to this part (When I met her in person, I was wowed by her beauty. But I sized her up and knew that if I make a move on her it won't work. I knew it would be more beneficial to have her as a friend rather than loose her in any attempt of wooing her)

You are the beta male many of us here have tried to describe, you settled for friend zone when you perceived her value to be higher than yours hoping to get a consolation lay. You have also proven one of the points one poster stated about 4 types of M/F friendship.

quote author=Konami94 post=60030537]For the girls, there are probably few types of male friends out there.

1. The ones who befriend you and hide in the guise friendship, but with explicit intentions to lash you.

2. The ones who think they can't have you, so they settle for friendship hoping for a miracle to happen someday. (Friendzone things)

olaboy1:
Go back and read what you just posted, pay attention to this part (When I met her in person, I was wowed by her beauty. But I sized her up and knew that if I make a move on her it won't work. I knew it would be more beneficial to have her as a friend rather than loose her in any attempt of wooing her)

You are the beta male many of us here have tried to describe, you settled for friend zone when you perceived her value to be higher than yours hoping to get a consolation lay. You have also proven one of the points one poster stated about 4 types of M/F friendship.

quote author=Konami94 post=60030537]For the girls, there are probably few types of male friends out there.

1. The ones who befriend you and hide in the guise friendship, but with explicit intentions to lash you.

2. The ones who think they can't have you, so they settle for friendship hoping for a miracle to happen someday. (Friendzone things)

My guy, you are still here answering all this beta males? I am already causing wahala in another thread since.

If that girl had given him the chance, he will also lick her anus. He was just bidding his time till the cake gets to him but his game is not solid.

They think it is by speaking grammar.

I think I will create a post on : friends to lovers to teach them.

You Thirsty Niggurs/Niggress Should Let This Thread Rest Naw Abi Wetin Be Una Problem GanGan Smhh

makydebbie:
Feel free.
At emboldened bro...

Prec1ous:
You should edit you email off, I sent a mail already.

That bold part was a disclaimer .

thank

lol, since you are opposed a boy and a girl coming to gather for anything. then what are you planning to do? what kind of friend do you want here. you are just hypocrite. we know your type already. and don't even bother to quote me. bye.

olaboy1:
Go back and read what you just posted, pay attention to this part (When I met her in person, I was wowed by her beauty. But I sized her up and knew that if I make a move on her it won't work. I knew it would be more beneficial to have her as a friend rather than loose her in any attempt of wooing her)

You are the beta male many of us here have tried to describe, you settled for friend zone when you perceived her value to be higher than yours hoping to get a consolation lay. You have also proven one of the points one poster stated about 4 types of M/F friendship.

quote author=Konami94 post=60030537]For the girls, there are probably few types of male friends out there.

1. The ones who befriend you and hide in the guise friendship, but with explicit intentions to lash you.

2. The ones who think they can't have you, so they settle for friendship hoping for a miracle to happen someday. (Friendzone things)

Lol, I wasn't hoping for a consolation lay, neither was I praying for a miracle to happen. Truth is we had communicated on phone before we met in person. I was enthusiastic about meeting her and also taught of asking her out If her looks met my specs, but u know na, as guys, after meeting a lady, u need to analyse ur probability of success or failure. After analyzing her personality I knew she wasn't cut out for relationship ish, so I made her a friend. And as for benefits, you are right, there some things I value in a lady more than sex. I'll rather maintain a platonic relationship rather than make a move for sex and loose out on other important things.

Joel3:
lol, since you are opposed a boy and a girl coming to gather for anything. then what are you planning to do? what kind of friend do you want here. you are just hypocrite. we know your type already. and don't even bother to quote me. bye.

In case you didn't understand my writeup, here's a better view. https://www.nairaland.com/4025368/friendship-opposite-sex#60011533

Stop being dumb for nothing, it's nauseating.

makydebbie:
Help me ask bro. Check out my thread. https://www.nairaland.com/4025368/friendship-opposite-sex#down

Lol, you've raised very valid points.. Nice thread dear.

Acidosis:
Lol, you've raised very valid points.. Nice thread dear.

Thanks dear.

nuelyoyo:
Are you fuckin for real?

Lol

4 real!!

joanana:
She loves being around boys because boys don't judge, they don't keep malice, they don't get angry for long, shes safe around boys and can be herself around them.

I know exactly how it feelsbut you can't understand y. You feel it's not right. Well, it will take time for her to adjust and let her male friends. Just be patient with her.

Male friends will tell you truth about yourself but girlfriends won't.

LOL, stop moving around with ladies who are scared of you, or won't care to tell you the truth. I've two close friends who are female, lol laveda and Juhann. They're very blunt with the truth. So your last statement is wrong.

makydebbie:
LOL, stop moving around with ladies who are scared of you, or won't care to tell you the truth. I've two close friends who are female, lol laveda and Juhann. They're very blunt with the truth. So your last statement is wrong.

Noted

It's been a while I saw a mature thread like this on FP. I read from the first to the last page and I enjoyed every page.

My opinion: Well, I would say it's not impossible to have close friends of the opposite sex. I have quite a number of beautiful female friends that I have never thought of dating not to talk of having sex with. Yes, some tend to give in to emotions at times but I am mature enough to maintain the boundary without necessarily hurting them or ruining the friendship.

It's difficult to give a rule regarding this issue as what works for me might not work for everyone else.

Again I commend the maturity displayed on this thread so far.

Prec1ous:
My guy, you are still here answering all this beta males? I am already causing wahala in another thread since.

If that girl had given him the chance, he will also lick her anus. He was just bidding his time till the cake gets to him but his game is not solid.

They think it is by speaking grammar.

I think I will create a post on : friends to lovers to teach them.

Oga, all men can not be the same.
Leave other people with their opinions and stop tagging them beta males. Who made you king of alpha males?

Nawa!!!

adajoe555:
why would you say so. Lemme not say I word that would restart your memory this morning

just let the guy be.

Prec1ous:
I still stand by my view.

A guy and a girl cannot be friends.

It is either they have a past romantic history, living in present romance or building the ground work for future romance.

Let us stop deceiving ourselves, the only relationship they can have and I will be half assured is if they are business partners.

All the girls I have dated, they all called me friends and I LOVE YOU entered into the equation from nowhere. Next, we were frolicking under the sheets, so called friend.

This is a secret, the easiest way for a guy to get a girl is to play the friendship card, along the line just change the game by adding romance, checkmate, she is yours.

If you as a girl cannot get female friends, then there is something wrong about you as a person and your attitude.

Guy also have problems and fights but the only time a guy calls a girl friend is when his game to see her pant is not in the advance stage.

Girls beware, you so-called male friends if given the chance will sleep with you without even thinking twice. Except you are transgender or have leprosy.

It is not ethical, someone will get confused along the way.

This is also a precursor to rape in some cases. The day they will gang rape you, your eyes go clear.

This is a guy's secret, we all want to sleep with that beautiful so-called friends of ours.

So girls, keep deceiving yourself.

If your best friend is a boy and he is not hitting on you then:

-You may not be as attractive as you think.

-You have a bad personality and we know guys are tolerant and pussy no dey bite.

-You are being preyed on the till you are vulnerable, he is watching till he can launch. When I don't know, a man can wait if he is certain to conquer.

- You are transgender or blocked.

Your only trusted male friends are:
Husband
Father
Brothers
Sons

READ THIS: How TRUST is the new SCAM: Stop this blatant lies about TRUST!

I always had more male than female. For me, it was easier to talk to guys. Plus girls were just surrounded by too much drama and pettiness. ..malice, backbiting, envy, competition,etc. But guys were so plain, drama free and easy to get along with.
The line was always drawn cos i am very blunt and straight to the point. No grey areas for me

ImaIma1:
I always had more male than female. For me, it was easier to talk to guys. Plus girls were just surrounded by too much drama and pettiness. ..malice, backbiting, envy, competition,etc. But guys were so plain, drama free and easy to get along with.
The line was always drawn cos i am very blunt and straight to the point. No grey areas for me

Let's not start again.

Guys are always easier to talk to because almost all of us are soft with women. The statement you made is something other guys will say about girls.

Guys Vs guys also have drama and AL those competition you talk about.

You should not be running away from shadows, my opinion has been that, you know your heart but you cannot read his heart.

Everything thing you said up there is just Me Me and ME, can you vouch for the content of his mind?

If your relationship is just good morning and good evening, great but when you start investing too much, then you will get a new flavor. It is cool if you are single but back off if you are engaged.

The point is, you may end up being hunted.

This are the likely scenario.
He may be bidding his time and still sizing you up.
You are unattractive to him.
He is benefiting other things from you.
You are forcing the friendship and he does not want to hurt you.

If your female friends are gossipers and all that, it is a judge of your character and no matter how you minimise that part of you, you will realize that you are not growing.

thowbie7ven:
The almighty Lord that has bestowed upon you "Wisdom, knowledge and Understanding" won't leave you for the enemies to kill...Thank you very much for this piece...Infact, I broke up with my Ex just because of this same issue...too many guys always calling them her friends...she'll always go out/hangout with them in their cars and what have you, always going to their houses to cook for them...uses them as her dps anytime they hangout etc...Initially, I was cool with it...but later, I started noticing she was getting carried away then I started calling her attention to it...Then she started saying I was Insecured, I don't trust her...blah blah...This was a girl that followed a Male friend to a hotel to spend a week with him(with another Female friend of hers)...I just had to break up with her...I cannot coman kill myself

Bro, your ex is an olosho, she was clearly cheating on you under the guise of 'friendship'.

Prec1ous:
Let's not start again.

Guys are always easier to talk to because almost all of us are soft with women. The statement you made is something other guys will say about girls.

Guys Vs guys also have drama and AL those competition you talk about.

You should not be running away from shadows, my opinion has been that, you know your heart but you cannot read his heart.

Everything thing you said up there is just Me Me and ME, can you vouch for the content of his mind?

If your relationship is just good morning and good evening, great but when you start investing too much, then you will get a new flavor. It is cool if you are single but back off if you are engaged.

The point is, you may end up being hunted.

This are the likely scenario.
He may be bidding his time and still sizing you up.
You are unattractive to him.
He is benefiting other things from you.
You are forcing the friendship and he does not want to hurt you.

If your female friends are gossipers and all that, it is a judge of your character and no matter how you minimise that part of you, you will realize that you are not growing.

Good points. But it is probably your personal opinion and experience that informs most of it. In all my years i have had more male friends and i haven't had issues with them. If at all they had other ideas or thoughts, i guess they kept it to themselves.
It has not affected my marriage in anyway cos i married someone that has more female friends than male.

ImaIma1:
Good points. But it is probably your personal opinion and experience that informs most of it. In all my years i have had more male friends and i haven't had issues with them. If at all they had other ideas or thoughts, i guess they kept it to themselves.
It has not affected my marriage in anyway cos i married someone that has more female friends than male.

Woooow, and you are cool with it?

Like you know he has so many female friends and you are down with it.

Is it more like, since you have male friends you can't tell him not to keep his female friends.

This is a new type of marital arrangement and I applaud you.

makydebbie:
LOL, stop moving around with ladies who are scared of you, or won't care to tell you the truth. I've two close friends who are female, lol laveda and Juhann. They're very blunt with the truth. So your last statement is wrong.

she is not wrong at all. not all ladies tell their girlfriends the blunt truth. many envy each other especially when the other is more prosperous.

thowbie7ven:
Total Bullshit Bro!...I just dey look all these guys saying"There's no P in a girl having too many Male Friends"...Let the cards turn opposite them a see if they'll be cool with their so called girlfriends/fiancees hanging out with her male friend(s), sleeping over in their house(s), cooking for them etc...all in the name of being "friends"...I bet, 90% of guys can't even make do with that..same for the Females also...

Guy, please stop reiterating ur own case, yours was a clear case of cheating. It's different from what we wave been debating on since. The issue being debated is about friendship between opposite sex, if it can lead to intimacy. I bet your girlfriend was clearly intimate with those guys she called friends from the word go, she was just lying to you that they are friends.

nuelyoyo:
Guy, please stop reiterating ur own case, yours was a clear case of cheating. It's different from what we wave been debating on since. The issue being debated is about friendship between opposite sex, if it can lead to intimacy. I bet your girlfriend was clearly intimate with those guys she called friends from the word go, she was just lying to you that they are friends.

Apart from my gf bro, i've seen/witnessed cases where a girl went to cook for her so called male friend and in that process, she slept over at the guy's place...and she's in a "serious" relationship with my cousin...not once,Not twice...the other time, she said she went to do an assignment at this guy's place, and in that process, she slept over....Can you condone this

thowbie7ven:
Apart from my gf bro, i've seen/witnessed cases where a girl went to cook for her so called male friend and in that process, she slept over at the guy's place...and she's in a "serious" relationship with my cousin...not once,Not twice...the other time, she said she went to do an assignment at this guy's place, and in that process, she slept over....Can you condone this

Hmmmn, that is trash, I cannot condone that, and if I ever overlook after I have confronted the lady, then am just keeping her with no seriousness for the relationship anymore.

leathalbeast:
she is not wrong at all. not all ladies tell their girlfriends the blunt truth. many envy each other especially when the other is more prosperous.

LOL, her statement was flawed. But there are other female friends that are good.

dancok:
stop it that's what this thread is saying,they will want to fvck you day no matter how old u are in future,they will wait

A male best friend and in relationship is that it

dancok:
stop it that's what this thread is saying,they will want to fvck you day no matter how old u are in future,they will wait

A male best friend and in relationship is that it.

nuelyoyo:
Hmmmn, that is trash, I cannot condone that, and if I ever overlook after I have confronted the lady, then am just keeping her with no seriousness for the relationship anymore.

Glad you can see where i'm drifting to...

pocohantas:
Oga, all men can not be the same.
Leave other people with their opinions and stop tagging them beta males. Who made you king of alpha males?

Nawa!!!

I just tire for the guy, he wants to force his life style down other pples throat. Everyone has his or her own experience with the opposite sex. Most pple have commented based on their experiences.

Prec1ous:
Woooow, and you are cool with it?

Like you know he has so many female friends and you are down with it.

Is it more like, since you have male friends you can't tell him not to keep his female friends.

This is a new type of marital arrangement and I applaud you.

Well it is about openness. I pick his calls and he picks mine and the sex of the caller is never an issue. There is no reason or basis for suspicion. He can keep female friends even if i dont keep male friends. We both know what boundaries are and we try not to cross them.
It is about understanding and communication but what works for us might not work for another couple.