₦airaland Forum

Lalas247:
Haha to be fair on day we slept on the bed ... I know he was awake but he sha lied said he was sleeping .. he turn and dropped his hand on my yansh (but he will lie and say he sleeping can’t remember ) my brother from another mother lol yes it’s true they will still think about it but I think once he knows it’s a no go area eventually they will give up and then become an over protective adopted brother

But it’s true sha ....

makydebbie:
Job.

Horlohlah:
You will see in Jesus name . Watsup with the contact I shared you?

makydebbie:
Two already said I should drop my application letter with them sef. Those ones are based in kumasi but the lady said she'll check for Accra and get back to me today.

Ladyjumong:
not everybody's world revolves around sex like urs. some have usefull thing to pursue in life other than sex. thats the least of their thought

Reski:
You just concluded without ever knowing me. my world revolves around sex indeed! Abeg shift.

menstrualpad:
Then suddenly a shoulder to cry on becomes a dick to ride on..kwantinue

Janeyinspires:
A shoulder to cry on remains a shoulder to cry on oh.

lilmax:
and when they have romance the girl ends up saying he raped her

if a guy is working I don't think he'd be jobless enough to be called a bestie

there's nothing like male-female besties, the girl just needs someone to be all over her, while the guy is jobless and doesn't have a girlfriend

fact

valkaka:
lol, this is absurd, utter balderdash, i am a very comfortable working-class dude and my best friend is a girl.SHE IS ONE OF THE BEST PEOPLE IVE MET SO U SEXIST PERSON LEAVE PEOPLE ALONE WITH UR STEREOTYPICAL ATTITUDES TOWARD FRIENDSHIP.i may be single still but she is in a loving relationship, in fact, i gave her the consent to accept the dudes request, we have been best friends since our first degree and right through our masters program together and still on.We help each other through hard times, we swim together and sleeps together in the same bed even and there is never a time we feel passion towards another despite loving each other like madt.We act stupid around each other, we tell secrets, we know everything about each other.We may get jealous, but that is only because we care and we don't want each other getting hurt. What is wrong with falling in love with your best friend that's a girl NOTHING it just means you will be by his side until the end even if he gets his own boyfriend you will support him. You won't hold higher standards you just want someone like her to understand you know your deepest secrets to stay by you.iam very happy she is dating and i am certainly cool with it, till today she still confides me.

valkaka:
When you see a girl and a boy out in the public, what is the first thought that comes to your mind? - They are in a relationship.
If you say they are wrong, what is the second thought? - They are siblings.
If you say they are wrong again, they would call you a liar and walk away. But, do they ever think of a third option? Do they ever think they could be best friends or just friends? Most of us don’t. Because that is something which the society ceases to consider, not just the society but our African mentality.

Every time you ask a girl about her best friend, knowingly or unknowingly, she uses feminine pronouns and every time we ask a guy about his best friend, we end up using masculine pronouns. This is because we don’t even consider the possibility of someone having a best friend from the opposite gender. And if a girl admits that her best friend is a boy or that she is very good friends with a guy, all hell breaks loose...she will be seen as a slut, incessant judging will start.that's sheer ignorance and very gross.The same thing with when a dude has female bestie or lots of female platonic friends, he will be seen as a Casanova or fuckboy.what a pity:

FRIEND is a gender-neutral word and it should be kept that way.Friendship is a relation which should be transparent from both the sides. .A relationship might just end someday. but real friendship Won't.Friendship is more valuable than anything in this world
As human beings, we usually have a tendency to create romantic projections of every equation shared by two individuals. We tend to talk about love in a romantic or sexual context. I Disagree, Friendship can turn into love but it doesn't mean that a guy and girl will always end up in love.Love is a choice a person makes, that they act upon. Love doesn’t discriminate and has nothing to do with gender. Love can be sexual or can be platonic in friendship regardless of gender.There is something special about a boy, girl friendship. You share almost everything between each other, you laugh, cry, tease, smile, play pranks, study, travel, eat and do everything imaginable.I guess what makes a girl-boy best friends relationship so strong is that there's so less drama in sharing thoughts, more practicality in decisions, lesser chances of being driven away like an emotional fool.

One can have a best friend who stands by them in times of trouble, like a brother, or a best friend who asks them to work towards their goals, like a caring father, or a best friend who scolds when they make mistakes in life, like a teacher. Maybe all these traits exist in one person, a girl or boy, I don’t think it makes a difference.it's all about the mindset. You change that, you will see friendship blooming all around you! And, by the way, isn't the bond of best friends a form of love itself?I do not see any reason why someone can’t have a best friend from the opposite gender.they can love each other immensely but not in a quintessential lovey-dovey kind of way.I think if you're very clear on defining that this is strictly platonic relationship you can develop a healthy, long-lasting friendship that is really worthwhile.

Conclusions:
Friendship is far better than relationship.
Relationship leads to many responsibilities.
Friendship doesn't have boundaries and time limit cos there are certain things you tell your best friend but you cant tell your partner.
It's probably the best thing to have a girl as your best friend.
Having a female or male bestie, you might not need to pretend anything for the girl or the boy. you could be completely yourself but your girlfriend or boyfriend, you might need to change yourself completely.

To me, gender just isn't an issue when choosing best friends. I'm more concerned about the kind of person they are and that we share lots in common.

Air your own opinion on the subject matter, please.

Ladyjumong:
sorry if ur not.made that assumption cause u also believe it not possible to have a male bestie who wouldnt want to have sex with u. was trying to prove u wrong

Reski:
Beleive! ma'am you just crucified me. thats quite a strong word to use. I dont beleive I just think most of the time male and female besties end up in the sac together. it doesnt me they can be no exceptions ma'am.

Lalas247:
Haha to be fair on day we slept on the bed ... I know he was awake but he sha lied said he was sleeping .. he turn and dropped his hand on my yansh (but he will lie and say he sleeping can’t remember ) my brother from another mother lol yes it’s true they will still think about it but I think once he knows it’s a no go area eventually they will give up and then become an over protective adopted brother

But it’s true sha ....

AONE555:
i go for the thin like i always do ......
but when the thin seems impossible
i gas settle for friend zone and re-strategize ...

Prec1ous:
[s]Sister, stop acting like a kid, what do you mean you were on a bed with a guy who is not your relation or lover. You are leading him on and claiming ignorance.[/s]

All those overprotective vibe is because he is still protecting his prey, if he cannot get it then no one else will.

Please stop aligning yourself to become a potential rape victim, this guy may respect you but what of the next one?

makydebbie:
I no feel like writing epistle jare. Keep using besties to fvck yourselves, it's not my pussy or my boyfriend's dick I'm good. When you find yourself with bestie nak.ed on the bed that's when you'll know he's not the Holy Spirit the comforter.

Lalas247:
Look learn to mind your own biz !
How’s is it any of your business .... now u quoted me how did it improve your personal life and well being
Just stfu if u don’t “where you there ? NO leading him on we,be been friends from nursery school our parents know each other maybe it is foreign to dregs like yourself to have childhood friend ... yall are the corrupt ones hence why AIDS is on the high yet u come here and act like it is in heard off to chill with family friend nonsense
Next time make sure it’s a fact and not a judgemental statement
Problem with Nigerians they feel they know it all yet keep look how the country is ... do not ever use your daft mentality and quote me again

Have a good day bloody FB GL1.0. HB

Lalas247:
Haha to be fair on day we slept on the bed ... I know he was awake but he sha lied said he was sleeping .. he turn and dropped his hand on my yansh (but he will lie and say he sleeping can’t remember ) my brother from another mother lol yes it’s true they will still think about it but I think once he knows it’s a no go area eventually they will give up and then become an over protective adopted brother

But it’s true sha ....

Prec1ous:
And who said it is just an African thing? The Issue is, Africans are more judgemental and thus our conscience is always on overdrive and we tend to weigh our actions.

The western world you are backing, do you know how often the so called friends get under the sheets? It is easier because no one is hounding them. So it's all friendship with benefits.

If you have a personal convictions that it is great and works for you, goodluck! It does not seem so easy for other.

You cannot and should never use logic to explain matters of the heart.

Emotions are wild most times and only a few can put theirs under check. The human brain naturally veers to the mother for comfort and solace likewise the sisters.

For every interaction, oxytocin, testosterone and other affection enhancing hormones are released and you have no control over this.

Working betide you, if your so called female friend is motherly or can make your brain release testosterone continuously, you relationship will change direction without your consent.

For this friendship to survive,

1. The girl really has to be so sexually unattractive to you and the boundaries should be well drawn with high fence. I have one like that.

2. The girl should be a benefactor and helper to you, that takes her off your food chain and your brain will put up a "don't go there" barrier. And even if you develop feelings, which you will, you can never act on it.

3. You are an eunuch or have been castrated.

4. Transgender and gay.

Bottom line, the relationship can work, but time and closeness with all the physical and mental touches will mess up your mind and affection will grow.

And also OP, i hate hypocrisy, wake me up when you can be cool with your partner having male friends aside you. Since you can't, take this....

lalasticlala and Mynd44, we need you guys here!

DeadRat:
sorry! If Am Gettin You Right,you Are Saying a Girl Cant Have A Male Bestie or A Girl Shouldnt have One.

Prec1ous:
I guess I flipped a switch.

Never meant to have you go all mushy, teary, emotional and MAD!

I also did not ask for all that personal history, it is really of no use here.

You can lie on the bed with all your male friends it really is no ones business.

The only problem is, this is a discussion board and anyone can be quoted inasmuch as you are watching and replying to a thread, so don't get all freaky except I had mentioned you out of thin air.

Sorry once again for flipping your switch, the last thing we want is having people on short fuse blowing up.

valkaka:
lol, this is absurd, utter balderdash, i am a very comfortable working-class dude and my best friend is a girl.SHE IS ONE OF THE BEST PEOPLE IVE MET SO U SEXIST PERSON LEAVE PEOPLE ALONE WITH UR STEREOTYPICAL ATTITUDES TOWARD FRIENDSHIP.i may be single still but she is in a loving relationship, in fact, i gave her the consent to accept the dudes request, we have been best friends since our first degree and right through our masters program together and still on.We help each other through hard times, we swim together and sleeps together in the same bed even and there is never a time we feel passion towards another despite loving each other like madt.We act stupid around each other, we tell secrets, we know everything about each other. We may get jealous, but that is only because we care and we don't want each other getting hurt. What is wrong with falling in love with your best friend that's a girl NOTHING it just means you will be by his side until the end even if he gets his own boyfriend you will support him. You won't hold higher standards you just want someone like her to understand you know your deepest secrets to stay by you.iam very happy she is dating and i am certainly cool with it, till today she still confides me.

makydebbie:
Yes that's what I'm saying.

DeadRat:
apart From the Fact That You are Allergic to Male besties ... Do You Have Male Friends?

sammyogboso:
Keeping a chicken as a pet is very dangerous because one day you'll sure eat it....a word is enough for the wise