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10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s - Romance (4) - Nairaland

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Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 6:22pm On Dec 11, 2017
Oyindidi:
Lol my brother, we learn daily. I'm a very difficult person. grin before now we quarrel whenever we are eating eba and soup together. It's funny nowgringrin my hand will be very neat and soup must not touch my eba but he is opposite of megringrin I will look at him with disgust and he will just wash his hand and leave the food. Now, I don't care. grin


Lol, you dey eat eba like me? I dey eat, my hands are perfectly neat, i don't lick them either, the eba must not scatter too. Na oyinbo dem dey call me when it comes to eba... grin
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Oyindidi(f): 6:23pm On Dec 11, 2017
Blackfyre:


Hehe, that's serious. You remind of this bros whose babe gave him that same amount because he needed to sort some things out. You won't believe the dude took the most to fela shrine to get wasted....

Needless to say, the dude never got married to her, perhaps fortunately for her...
That guy no get sense angry
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 6:25pm On Dec 11, 2017
KreativGenius:



And you want to marry? Infact i'm raising the bars cause of this comment. To have a good relationship, we must be willing to accommodate what we hate.

By the way, you're highly methodical, analytical and like things done in a sophisticated manner. Are you a virgo ?

Yea i am.....nope i am not going to accommodate what i hate....i can tolerate somethings but not what i hate..
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Oyindidi(f): 6:29pm On Dec 11, 2017
KreativGenius:



God bless you my sister. Now you've arrived. Not the eba or how we packs the eba or folds it that matters, but you love right ! loving right blinds our eyes to the flaws in our partners.Please transfer this knowledge to the younger ladies abeg
Lol, it was not easy back. We celebrated our 10 years anniversary last Friday.

To the topic of discussion, that lady is not serious. I married in my early 20s and I'm not regretting one bit.
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 6:33pm On Dec 11, 2017
Oyindidi:
You must learn to accommodate others. You need to learn that fast grin

I do really if it is a shared place, like hostel or whatever because i know that is most likely for a period of time till i get my space. But wifey level for life?.....no thank you... Except if she is sick or pregnant will i sleep over at her room.
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 6:34pm On Dec 11, 2017
Oyindidi:
That guy no get sense angry

Dude was an addict, that babe would have been the best for him. Very disciplined..
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by ubunja(m): 6:40pm On Dec 11, 2017
MissJoy29:
I'm especially directing this post to @kreativegenius and @ubunja who have been talking about women in their 30's having too much "baggage". Is it that men don't have baggages? What do you even consider as baggage? Only negative changes stem from bad relationships? That's where I fault your reasonings. I have a friend who frankly hasn't had any experience with females, he is currently in his first major relationship. But cos the girl isn't all that serious with him and cos of his person & how much he loves her, that experience has hardened him. I ask him a lot, "how many experiences have you had that makes you hate women like this"?
On the other hand, there are people who have gone through so many heartbreaks yet still have so much love and sweetness to give when they find the right person. I tell my friends, "no amount of heartbreak will make me mistreat my husband or make him pay for the sins of others. If I can love the wrong person so right, what do you think I will do when I see the right person". The bad experiences will just make me naturally cautious(once bitten, twice shy). And that's a good thing cos you weed out the bad ones around you. But once the right person comes along, there shouldn't be any holds barred.
What am I trying to say? Bad experiences or too many failed relationships do not equal "lack of freshness", "too many baggages" or "loveless" like you all called it. There are so many other factors that might contribute to that like indirect experiences.
A lot depends on an individual to know how he/she reacts to the experiences in their lives.

On the right time to marry, it depends. Age is just a number. Some mature early, some don't. What works for A may not work for B. I would have got married by now if I know what I know now earlier on in life. But on the other hand, I seem to think I know a whole lot that will make me stay in the marriage now. I know myself very well. If I had got married then, I don't think I would have lasted. And that's something I wouldn't want to go through, DIVORCE. So, whatever age works for the individual: teens, 20's, 30's, even 40's. The most important thing is Peace, stability and fulfilment in the marriage. Only Pray for the right person & all these restrictions we give ourselves will fade into nothingness.

Always remember that it's not how fast but how WELL!

On the right place to marry from, I have also seen marriages between Nigerians and foreigners that didn't go down well. And there are a lot of marriages between Nigerians that stood ( & still standing ) the test of time. But one thing I know for sure is, guys who are in those countries you mentioned & felt their ladies are better for marriage than our ladies, still leave those ladies and come back home to take a wife. Have you asked yourself why? Find out. All these our guys ranting hete and there about Nigerian girls this, Nigerian girls that, how many foreign women have they married? Every weekend, weddings go on here. Who's marrying who you should ask?
You shouldn't judge a book by its cover you know. That someone is good for relationship/friendship, does it mean that person is good for marriage? If that's the case, everyone would have been married by now...or don't you think? cool

go marry yourself.
guys dont like baggage.essays wont change that.if that pisses you off just be a lesbian.
and im only replying coz this message of yours popped up on my notifications.

3 Likes

Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 6:42pm On Dec 11, 2017
Oyindidi:
Lol, it was not easy back. We celebrated our 10 years anniversary last Friday.

To the topic of discussion, that lady is not serious. I married in my early 20s and I'm not regretting one bit.


Early 20s is the best. Congrats
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 6:43pm On Dec 11, 2017
Blackfyre:


Yea i am.....nope i am not going to accommodate what i hate....i can tolerate somethings but not what i hate..

It's easy to see you're a second tier virgo.

Intellect, Analytical, Organized, Perfectionist, Knowledgeable, but then you need to work on tolerance oh. You'll need it. Virgo standards are too high for almost all non-Virgos
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 6:45pm On Dec 11, 2017
MissJoy29:
I'm especially directing this post to @kreativegenius and @ubunja who have been talking about women in their 30's having too much "baggage". Is it that men don't have baggages? What do you even consider as baggage? Only negative changes stem from bad relationships? That's where I fault your reasonings. I have a friend who frankly hasn't had any experience with females, he is currently in his first major relationship. But cos the girl isn't all that serious with him and cos of his person & how much he loves her, that experience has hardened him. I ask him a lot, "how many experiences have you had that makes you hate women like this"?
On the other hand, there are people who have gone through so many heartbreaks yet still have so much love and sweetness to give when they find the right person. I tell my friends, "no amount of heartbreak will make me mistreat my husband or make him pay for the sins of others. If I can love the wrong person so right, what do you think I will do when I see the right person". The bad experiences will just make me naturally cautious(once bitten, twice shy). And that's a good thing cos you weed out the bad ones around you. But once the right person comes along, there shouldn't be any holds barred.
What am I trying to say? Bad experiences or too many failed relationships do not equal "lack of freshness", "too many baggages" or "loveless" like you all called it. There are so many other factors that might contribute to that like indirect experiences.
A lot depends on an individual to know how he/she reacts to the experiences in their lives.

On the right time to marry, it depends. Age is just a number. Some mature early, some don't. What works for A may not work for B. I would have got married by now if I know what I know now earlier on in life. But on the other hand, I seem to think I know a whole lot that will make me stay in the marriage now. I know myself very well. If I had got married then, I don't think I would have lasted. And that's something I wouldn't want to go through, DIVORCE. So, whatever age works for the individual: teens, 20's, 30's, even 40's. The most important thing is Peace, stability and fulfilment in the marriage. Only Pray for the right person & all these restrictions we give ourselves will fade into nothingness.

Always remember that it's not how fast but how WELL!

On the right place to marry from, I have also seen marriages between Nigerians and foreigners that didn't go down well. And there are a lot of marriages between Nigerians that stood ( & still standing ) the test of time. But one thing I know for sure is, guys who are in those countries you mentioned & felt their ladies are better for marriage than our ladies, still leave those ladies and come back home to take a wife. Have you asked yourself why? Find out. All these our guys ranting hete and there about Nigerian girls this, Nigerian girls that, how many foreign women have they married? Every weekend, weddings go on here. Who's marrying who you should ask?
You shouldn't judge a book by its cover you know. That someone is good for relationship/friendship, does it mean that person is good for marriage? If that's the case, everyone would have been married by now...or don't you think? cool



This is the other side... You have spoken well
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 6:46pm On Dec 11, 2017
KreativGenius:


It's easy to see you're a second tier virgo.

Intellect, Analytical, Organized, Perfectionist, Knowledgeable, but then you need to work on tolerance oh. You'll need it. Virgo standards are too high for almost all non-Virgos

What's first tier virgo? ....grin i don't really take this astrology things serious tho....

Yea, standards being too high, often heard that. See why i said bending doesn't work? It's like you are just lying to yourself to be accepted and yet unhappy on top of it. Makes no sense....
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 6:48pm On Dec 11, 2017
Blackfyre:


What's first tier virgo? ....grin i don't really take this astrology things serious tho....

Yea, standards being too high, often heard that. See why i said bending doesn't work? It's like you are just lying to yourself to be accepted and yet unhappy on top of it. Makes no sense....


Trust me. I.Q. level 156, highest Virgoean. I have to come down oh. If not, i won't get married. You should. You're too perfect !
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Oyindidi(f): 6:48pm On Dec 11, 2017
Blackfyre:


I do really if it is a shared place, like hostel or whatever because i know that is most likely for a period of time till i get my space. But wifey level for life?.....no thank you... Except if she is sick or pregnant will i sleep over at her room.
Difficult husband to be. grin
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 6:52pm On Dec 11, 2017
Oyindidi:
Difficult husband to be. grin


He's a Virgo. No mind am, he can barley stand it if things don't fall in place perfectly.
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 6:52pm On Dec 11, 2017
KreativGenius:



Trust me. I.Q. level 156, highest Virgoean. I have to come down oh. If not, i won't get married. You should. You're too perfect !

That's nice. That's what you think tho, there is always someone out there...
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Daeylar(f): 6:54pm On Dec 11, 2017
Blackfyre:


Very well said....
Thanks smiley

1 Like

Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 6:55pm On Dec 11, 2017
Blackfyre:


That's nice. That's what you think tho, there is always someone out there...


"Alternative Mindset " Yes, i agree, it hinders optimum input in relationships
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 6:58pm On Dec 11, 2017
Oyindidi:
Difficult husband to be. grin

My ability to care for her to a fault will make up for it....doubt she will be bothered...
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Oyindidi(f): 7:06pm On Dec 11, 2017
KreativGenius:



Early 20s is the best. Congrats
Thanks dear
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Oyindidi(f): 7:07pm On Dec 11, 2017
Blackfyre:


My ability to care for her to a fault will make up for it....doubt she will be bothered...
All this na washgrin Your short won't let you sleep in your room
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Oyindidi(f): 7:08pm On Dec 11, 2017
KreativGenius:



He's a Virgo. No mind am, he can barley stand it if things don't fall in place perfectly.
Lol, his short leg won't let him be in his room
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 7:09pm On Dec 11, 2017
Oyindidi:
Thanks dear


10 years. No be ebans o. Well done. No wonder you have the understanding they don't have.
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 7:11pm On Dec 11, 2017
Oyindidi:
All this na washgrin Your short won't let you sleep in your room

After fuçking her, i will go back to my room na, doesn't mean i have to sleep in her room or share same room.....its even more fun that way.
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Oyindidi(f): 7:14pm On Dec 11, 2017
KreativGenius:



10 years. No be ebans o. Well done. No wonder you have the understanding they don't have.
Yes o, I wanted to create a thread but I realized too many trolls here. He is a Nairalander toogrin
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Oyindidi(f): 7:17pm On Dec 11, 2017
Blackfyre:


After fuçking her, i will go back to my room na, doesn't mean i have to sleep in her room or share same room.....its even more fun that way.
You can't grin what about after sexx cuddling? I won't take such from my man
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 7:24pm On Dec 11, 2017
Oyindidi:
You can't grin what about after sexx cuddling? I won't take such from my man

If she insists because i can't cuddle with a woman due to the way i sleep so it will not work for me to sleep. She may fall asleep then i just sneak out or i lay beside her...

But after thorough fuçking normal thing na to go baff and sleep na, well for me tho.
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Oyindidi(f): 7:29pm On Dec 11, 2017
Blackfyre:


If she insists because i can't cuddle with a woman due to the way i sleep so it will not work for me to sleep. She may fall asleep then i just sneak out or i lay beside her...

But after thorough fuçking normal thing na to go baff and sleep na, well for me tho.
Hahahaha... You dance while sleepinggringringrin this is funny. Let me lipsrsealed I can be very mean sometimesgrin
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 7:59pm On Dec 11, 2017
Daeylar:
Blackfyre, do I agree? Well, It's her opinion and it's a good one, however someone can achieve all these things she listed in their 20s and get married, there is no need then to wait until their 30s unless they just want to wait.

No need to bash those getting married in their 20s and act like they don't know anything just because she didn't know anything in her 20s, she can't use her experience to judge others
Everyone is different.

Some people are a hot mess in their 20s also. That's also true,

However some people do need or choose to wait till their 30s and that's OK too

However some people also, in their 30s are a hot mess so it's not really about the age,


I like her points, very reasonable, she had some really good points, however, age really has nothing to do with it.
Haha! *There she goes, like a shooting star*......

You hit the bull's eye. Your arrow got the boar. kiss kiss

The fact is that people run DIFFERENT races, make a certain discovery at DIFFERENT times, because they develop the ability to do it at DIFFERENT times too. So, they should be allowed to move at THEIR OWN PACE!

No one should give them rules.

I've noticed people like drawing conclusions from their own life experiences and passing judgements based on them---then they try peddling their own 'truth' as reality. But like I'll always say, "THE WORLD IS BIGGER THAN THAT".

Life has so many sides to it, and you only know the side you've seen. In one case, all the sides may have the same dimensions---the same length, breadth or height---while in others, the dimensions might differ.

You can make general assertions about a square by seeing just ONE side of it---since all its sides are equal. But can the same be said of a trapezium?

1 Like

Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Daeylar(f): 8:55pm On Dec 11, 2017
You always speak the truth dear always kiss this post is nothing but the truth.

Naezara:
Haha! *There she goes, like a shooting star*......

You hit the bull's eye. Your arrow got the boar. kiss kiss
Thanks kiss

The fact is that people run DIFFERENT races, make a certain discovery at DIFFERENT times, because they develop the ability to do it at DIFFERENT times too. So, they should be allowed to move at THEIR OWN PACE!

No one should give them rules.


Exactly, its tiring when I see people try and mold others in their own image, like, let people live, everyone can't be like you, every can't act the same way you do,

Let people live, I'm tired of people trying to control others and they always do it under the disguise of "I just care about you and want to see you do well." They always use that excuse of they care about you which is why they are trying to control, sorry, "help" you,, lol.


But they are the first set if people who cry and roll on the ground when you attempt to control them in return.

No one should give them rules.

Say this so many times

I've noticed people like drawing conclusions from their own life experiences and passing judgements based on them---then they try peddling their own 'truth' as reality. But like I'll always say, "THE WORLD IS BIGGER THAN THAT".
Exactly
And it's a very myopic way of thinking, it's also a very arrogant way to act,
that's what this author was trying to do. Just because she got married in her 30s and it was the best time for her, therefore it must be the best time for everyone, lol, imagine her thinking of giving people counsel just because they got engaged early, lol, she needs to come down from her high horse and relax.


Now imagine Some one in who got married in their 20s and is having the best life now comes out to challenge her and it leads to needless, useless arguments about the best stage in life to marry. Lol, arguments that wouldn't come up if they both just accepted that everyone is different and what works for this person might not work for you, or may work for you just in a different way,

[/quote]Life has so many sides to it, and you only know the side you've seen. In one case, all the sides may have the same dimensions---the same length, breadth or height---while in others, the dimensions might differ.

You can make general assertions about a square by seeing just ONE side of it---since all its sides are equal. But can the same be said of a trapezium? [/quote]

Truth. Lol,
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 8:58pm On Dec 11, 2017
Too much narcissistic personality disorderliness thesedays...mentally unstable people with horrible sense of self everywhere..Na wa
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 9:33pm On Dec 11, 2017
Daeylar:
You always speak the truth dear always kiss this post is nothing but the truth.


Thanks kiss



Exactly, its tiring when I see people try and mold others in their own image, like, let people live, everyone can't be like you, every can't act the same way you do,

Let people live, I'm tired of people trying to control others and they always do it under the disguise of "I just care about you and want to see you do well." They always use that excuse of they care about you which is why they are trying to control, sorry, "help" you,, lol.


But they are the first set of people who cry and roll on the ground when you attempt to control them in return.



Say this so many times


Exactly
And it's a very myopic way of thinking, it's also a very arrogant way to act,
that's what this author was trying to do. Just because she got married in her 30s and it was the best time for her, therefore it must be the best time for everyone, lol, imagine her thinking of giving people counsel just because they got engaged early, lol, she needs to come down from her high horse and relax.


Now imagine Some one in who got married in their 20s and is having the best life now comes out to challenge her and it leads to needless, useless arguments about the best stage in life to marry. Lol, arguments that wouldn't come up if they both just accepted that everyone is different and what works for this person might not work for you, or may work for you just in a different way,

Truth. Lol,
So many people can't see beyond their noses. They lock themselves up in their candle boxes and fail to see outside their little bubble of existence. This makes them susceptible to shallowness---they make assertions built on shaky foundations, since they're underpinned by delusions and false assumptions.

That's the way of the world. grin

I hope you had a great day. How're you doing tonight? kiss
Re: 10 Strong Reasons You Should Get Married In Your 30s, Not Your 20s by Nobody: 10:03pm On Dec 11, 2017
I read different views some biased and some judgemental there’s nothing like baggage and in fact it’s created by miopic views and selfishness not to even forget greed.

Everyone is capable of love and everyone will find that true love that lasts a lifetime

My experiences in love have been humbling and I can only say regardless of the age but I find that a man who’s not content in love at a certain age will never be you could marry someone young and she may leave you one day talking about she hasn’t experienced life yet then you will know love knows no age love does not discriminate

Just pray you find loyalty for where there is loyalty there is kindness and where there is kindness there is love

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