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Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk - Romance (7) - Nairaland

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Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by 360command: 4:13pm On Dec 30, 2017
doyinbaby:
That guy is no good......atleast now you know he doesn't love you.......he was only with you because you are a comfort to him during his difficult times.......all his friends knew about the money except you ( red flag).... Now it is time to disconnect from him in everyway......block him on watsapp,block him on your mobile line,block him on Facebook,.......move on with your life never look back...so that he will not be a time waster in your life........however if you think he is sincerely remorseful you can give him another chance,.......cheers
To me, another chance should be given if he can stay away from gambling.. Those are bad vices, for every one naira he has, he spends on gambling.. He won't be focused on being a man where he ought to be the bread winner.

I know of a Lebanese friend back in gh, he is a low life. Thank God he married a good woman who labours to cater for the family. It is funny though, the children don't see the father as the father but they see the mother as the father. The Lebanese man loves to gamble, he is a disgraced to the Lebanese community back in gh. Everyday he plays the sport betting and he does not have a real job... But the man is so into his wife, not that he loves her which he claims he does but the fact that he is a loser and has no friends around him.
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by bid4rich(m): 4:13pm On Dec 30, 2017
There is a saying that says "What you don't resist has the right to remain" You probably have seen the handwritten on the wall but you refuse to do something about it hence, his actions and inaction.

Anyway, I congratulate you that it happens this way because you would have been more devastated if you have married him.

Please be more careful and let your next relationship be built on a more solid foundation. I wish you well
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by mechanics(m): 4:13pm On Dec 30, 2017
poik:




Some may say it's about the man, but I say its about what he does.

Your boyfriend is a betnaija addict and you let him?

Your boyfriend is an idolater and you didn't talk him out of it?


Come easy, go easy.

Prov 30:11Proverbs 13:11 (KJV) Wealth gotten by vanity shall be diminished: but he that gathereth by labour shall increase.


Its not him; its the spirit behind gambling.
Nice one, one of my favourite passage
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by xendra: 4:13pm On Dec 30, 2017
Edonojie007:

You Are Not Making Sense. My Mum Struggled With My Dad.
You Are Just A Feministic Hoe; I Pity You.
Repent!! What Would Hate For Men Profit You- Yet,You Still Sell To Them Your Yansh.
nobody will struggle with you idiot, continue like this and you will turn out in one of those homicide stories. it's because of people like you women stopped struggling with men. useless thing from useless parent

3 Likes

Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by sholasys: 4:14pm On Dec 30, 2017
Missali:
One of the qualities men look out out for in a woman is the ability for her to stay true by him during trying times and a woman who cannot do that is termed a non wife material and slay Queen at best and at worst, a gold digger.
It is believed that when a woman supports her man and he comes to, in turn he will respect her and share responsibilities as he should but often times, this is not the case.

Many at times we have heard experiences from family, friends, colleagues or even gone through it.
Here's mine: I had this boyfriend that was struggling in every sense of the word. We kept on despite his financial shortcomings and I would travel a long distance to see him knowing fully well that the trip expenses and all that came with it were on me. I did not hesitate to oblige favours that I could give and ensured I went out with him during his jobs just to give that moral support.

Things seemed to be going on well until the day I was sitting with some friends and one of them asked how I was enjoying with my boyfriend. I responded with a light laugh and he asked "now that your guy has made it, what is the way forward?"

Me: Made it how?
Guy: Your guy hit over one million in that online betting promo.
Me: Yes yes, it's not easy... Such an unexpected favour at a time like this.

I pretended to be aware and happy but I wasn't myself till the end of the day. Everybody knew the good news except me.
One week, two weeks, one month passed and I got no call from my estranged boyfriend to even tell me what had happened. I refused to call too.

I heard news about how he had become the man about town, declaring free drinks for people he met at our street bars, dashing money to those who came to celebrate with him etc. Whenever someone who knew us sighted me they asked, "are you not M's girlfriend?" and I mumbled any answer that came to mind.
Months later I got a call from him begging to see Me. After many refusals, I decided we meet. He went on his knees apologising, saying he knew I was aware of all that had happened but was too ashamed to contact me. He went on about how he rented an apartment for one girl, was giving out money with reckless abandon, purchased an expensive mobile phone which he ended up selling at an abysmally low price (due to hardship) and how he was popping bottles at bars et al.

The length and breadth of the story was that the money was all gone. The business idea we had brainstormed he made no use of the money to invest. All his friends and girlfriends had left him for good and he felt lonely, he remembered the one who stood by him sincerely.

At the moment he had not a penny, with an empty stomach and looking for a way to get a small job. I could tell he was miserable from his looks alone. If only he had the right company who would have advised him at such a critical time, he'd never have had to go hungry again. I took him to a restaurant and we had a nice meal. He called me a good girl, a loving friend, a confidant blah blah blah.

Ladies, they will come at you with twisted words tell you they want a good woman, a patient woman, a supportive woman etc. Some will even tell you that they can never respect a woman who does not struggle with them. Do not fall for it. Most times, what they want is someone to take their excesses while they move on to cast their net elsewhere. For tens of stories about men who stick by their women when the going got smooth, there are hundreds of untold stories about men who looked the other way.

Playing the supportive role is the case of it may work and it may not. It is not stated anywhere that after standing by him and he leaves for another woman, he will be mobbed. You will simply be remembered as 'the one who once was', that's all.

It is a case of driving into a place with the words "cars parked at owner's risk." Nobody will tell you not to park your car but you hold yourself liable should anything happen to it. Hence, stand by your man at owner's risk.



You made a terrible mistake by not asking him about the money he won, he needed someone to guide him. You stayed away because of annoyance and sheer ego

1 Like

Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by mechanics(m): 4:15pm On Dec 30, 2017
poik:




Some may say it's about the man, but I say its about what he does.

Your boyfriend is a betnaija addict and you let him?

Your boyfriend is an idolater and you didn't talk him out of it?


Come easy, go easy.

Prov 30:11Proverbs 13:11 (KJV) Wealth gotten by vanity shall be diminished: but he that gathereth by labour shall increase.


Its not him; its the spirit behind gambling.
nice one, one of my favourite passage.

1 Like

Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by Silumi(f): 4:16pm On Dec 30, 2017
Librarian!I always say this support them and upgrade their Esteem small and boom the grow wings and fly away lol.dont date a broke boy a man's true character is exhibited in his state of plenty
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by Swazzkid(m): 4:16pm On Dec 30, 2017
[color=#770077][/color]
There is just one spirit that follows betting most times the money is not used 4 reasonable stuffs either betting takes it back or something unreasonable . Just consol him n try to mk him stop sport betting because the spirit that goes with is very bad
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by mechanics(m): 4:17pm On Dec 30, 2017
xendra:
very true, I keep trying to tell people this, but I guess you'll all have to experience it to know. I know too many stories like this, I already feel sorry for a friend because she is about to experience this yet can't see it even tho its so obvious
eyah, too bad for her, she will soon come to her senses.
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by buffalowings: 4:17pm On Dec 30, 2017
Nonsense write up
Don't go and make your own money
Be waiting on a Bf
That he is playing bet9ja to stay afloat deprives you of my sympathy
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by Jethrolite(m): 4:17pm On Dec 30, 2017
Missali

It is really hard to see a person who can write for so long on nairaland and be coherent with proper English. What I can tell you is your ex never made it, N1m is not money in Nigeria of today, also you shouldn't hope the prosperity of a loved one will rub off on you.

The typical Nigerian is deceitful and will exploit whoever is involved in any form of dealings with them.

You are smart, I urge you to work out your own prosperity to afford you the life of your dreams. Achieving that life should be dependent on you and you alone.

2 Likes

Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by lawrenzooo: 4:18pm On Dec 30, 2017
.
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by zainmaxwell(m): 4:19pm On Dec 30, 2017
Incrizz:


Yeah...understanding.
Well, maybe realising that a woman is an emotional being may help a lot of men understand their woman better.

Learning to find the emotional name for her actions may help your understanding of her as well as your dealings with her.

Some women act "stupid" when angry.
You telling her something like "You're angry" rather than "why did you do this?" May yeild better fruit.

But it arnt easy man.

It's just that there are people who have mastered the art of relationship as well as communication.

most times the act of communication is the key and believe me u an open mind is an thinking....and sometimes is just to believe
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by crystar: 4:19pm On Dec 30, 2017
Missali:
One of the qualities men look out out for in a woman is the ability for her to stay true by him during trying times and a woman who cannot do that is termed a non wife material and slay Queen at best and at worst, a gold digger.
It is believed that when a woman supports her man and he comes to, in turn he will respect her and share responsibilities as he should but often times, this is not the case.

Many at times we have heard experiences from family, friends, colleagues or even gone through it.
Here's mine: I had this boyfriend that was struggling in every sense of the word. We kept on despite his financial shortcomings and I would travel a long distance to see him knowing fully well that the trip expenses and all that came with it were on me. I did not hesitate to oblige favours that I could give and ensured I went out with him during his jobs just to give that moral support.

Things seemed to be going on well until the day I was sitting with some friends and one of them asked how I was enjoying with my boyfriend. I responded with a light laugh and he asked "now that your guy has made it, what is the way forward?"

Me: Made it how?
Guy: Your guy hit over one million in that online betting promo.
Me: Yes yes, it's not easy... Such an unexpected favour at a time like this.

I pretended to be aware and happy but I wasn't myself till the end of the day. Everybody knew the good news except me.
One week, two weeks, one month passed and I got no call from my estranged boyfriend to even tell me what had happened. I refused to call too.

I heard news about how he had become the man about town, declaring free drinks for people he met at our street bars, dashing money to those who came to celebrate with him etc. Whenever someone who knew us sighted me they asked, "are you not M's girlfriend?" and I mumbled any answer that came to mind.
Months later I got a call from him begging to see Me. After many refusals, I decided we meet. He went on his knees apologising, saying he knew I was aware of all that had happened but was too ashamed to contact me. He went on about how he rented an apartment for one girl, was giving out money with reckless abandon, purchased an expensive mobile phone which he ended up selling at an abysmally low price (due to hardship) and how he was popping bottles at bars et al.

The length and breadth of the story was that the money was all gone. The business idea we had brainstormed he made no use of the money to invest. All his friends and girlfriends had left him for good and he felt lonely, he remembered the one who stood by him sincerely.

At the moment he had not a penny, with an empty stomach and looking for a way to get a small job. I could tell he was miserable from his looks alone. If only he had the right company who would have advised him at such a critical time, he'd never have had to go hungry again. I took him to a restaurant and we had a nice meal. He called me a good girl, a loving friend, a confidant blah blah blah.

Ladies, they will come at you with twisted words tell you they want a good woman, a patient woman, a supportive woman etc. Some will even tell you that they can never respect a woman who does not struggle with them. Do not fall for it. Most times, what they want is someone to take their excesses while they move on to cast their net elsewhere. For tens of stories about men who stick by their women when the going got smooth, there are hundreds of untold stories about men who looked the other way.

Playing the supportive role is the case of it may work and it may not. It is not stated anywhere that after standing by him and he leaves for another woman, he will be mobbed. You will simply be remembered as 'the one who once was', that's all.

It is a case of driving into a place with the words "cars parked at owner's risk." Nobody will tell you not to park your car but you hold yourself liable should anything happen to it. Hence, stand by your man at owner's risk.


I read your stories wit tears as I took reminiscent of a failed experience. The truth is that it hurt but that doesn't makes every struggling person (guy) to be the same .
My advice for you is pls and pls don't change your good personalities because you were once in the wrong boat , coz someone special who will wipe those tears away is already watching you. Both of you weren't meant to be , and that is the gospel truth .
I have seen girls who had failed good guys in the past just as a good guy has failed you .
You are willing send me pm let's talk.
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by mechanics(m): 4:19pm On Dec 30, 2017
Blackfyre:

Except me.sha....*whistling away*
Lolz.
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by yanabazee: 4:20pm On Dec 30, 2017
Missali:


I reiterate, you don't sound intelligent.

Used to work with a betting company, had a friend who won big and squandered the money within a week...

The lady who owned the betting shop was said to have used voodoo to open the place... But in all... gambling money have never been used wisely...

Before you judge that guy, go about and ask how many people who had gotten millions of naira from winning a bet used the money to make good progress... Even those who used the money to venture into businesses don't make good sales...

I'll say, you should only be thankful to God for he didn't allow him to give you proceeds from that money...Try and forgive him only if you can turn him away from becoming addictive to betting... that's the reason he has been in that state of struggling.

I can tell you many stories about people who has never make good use of their winning.. A gambler is a greedy person..
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by rill: 4:20pm On Dec 30, 2017
You guys should give the Op a break. She didn't even say all guys behave such way. The boyfriend messed up and that's it, period!!!!

1 Like

Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by mechanics(m): 4:20pm On Dec 30, 2017
bitchcrafts:
Lol. I see u b*ch!
easy, not here to insult.
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by mechanics(m): 4:21pm On Dec 30, 2017
xendra:
yea, but right now the guy is like her trophy. tell her and you become an enemy of progress. soo...
Lolz, she may see reason and change na, you can't conclude like that.
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by Veeflow(m): 4:23pm On Dec 30, 2017
Missali:


I'm sorry to say but you don't sound intelligent right now.
don't sound intelligent or acting as an animal
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by mechanics(m): 4:25pm On Dec 30, 2017
Missali:


If a man cannot start up something with one million, give him ten million and it will still end up in excuses... And no, I'm not. Thanks.
sure.
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by Nobody: 4:26pm On Dec 30, 2017
Missali:
Neither, what I mean is that men clamour for women who would stick with them through thick and thin without eventually playing out their roles when it comes down to it.
This same guys comes online to rant about women who ain't loyal and all that as if, they are.
While I sympathize with you, I need you and other ladies to understand that dating a guy that doesn't have money is not a sacrifice/favour. If you develop feelings for a broke or poor guy, you're dating him because you have feelings for him so you're not "suffering" or sacrificing anything. Don't date a guy with the hope that when he "makes" it you'll start throwing his cash around. As a decent lady I expect you to date a hardworking guy with potentials, someone who fits into your plans for the future. Sounds like your guy is addicted to gambling and to be honest you didn't paint him as someone that has any future ambitions he's taking logical steps to achieve. The keyword is logical steps. Anybody can daydream of being a billionaire, but is he taking steps/doing things to help him actualize his dream? When people say "potential" they mean people that're taking steps to ensure a bright future by going to school, working hard (legally and honestly), being financially disciplined- saving to invest in a business etc. Unfortunately what girls want these days are guys wearing Gucci, driving cars and giving them money. That's the average Naija girl's dream, the amount of money they can enjoy off their boyfriends, either by collecting raw cash or enjoying the perks that come with money, going to fancy bars/hotels, travelling abroad etc.
Pls drop this "he owes me because I stuck by his side when he was poor" mentality. Unless you actually used your money to feed him/send him to school, you didn't make any sacrifices. You simply chose love over comfort, that doesn't mean he's a monster if he gets tired of the relationship along the way. Love is also a form of 'enjoyment'. Girls that date rich men they don't have feelings for sacrifice the feeling of being in love, because of money, so the choice is yours. Follow your heart with the knowledge that it may not work out or (if you're unlucky not to find a rich dude you genuinely have feelings for) force yourself to remain in a relationship with any rich dude that comes your way.....and probably cheat on him with the hustling dude you truly love. Your choice

3 Likes

Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by Edonojie007(m): 4:26pm On Dec 30, 2017
xendra:
nobody will struggle with you idiot, continue like this and you will turn out in one of those homicide stories. it's because of people like you women stopped struggling with men. useless thing from useless parent
See This One. And You Think Am Struggling?
I Wont Insult Your Parents,because From Your Comment,they Are So Useless To You,so Insulting Them Wont Hurt You,thats Why You Freely Insulted Mine. I Would Just Pity Them(SMH),cause They Already Have A Useless Daughter,whom Is A Professional Hoe. Pity.
Mine Have Been Useful To Me.
And They've Played A Very Big Part In My Success.

1 Like

Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by cherriex(f): 4:27pm On Dec 30, 2017
[quote author=zainmaxwell post=63723982]are u trying to say he made it cos u are there then he became broke cos he left u cos me ayam not understanding [/quote
She's trying to say she was there for him in hardship but when he hammer,he no Even sniff her side,na when money finished he remembered her again,in a nutshell Her mumu don do.]

1 Like

Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by mechanics(m): 4:28pm On Dec 30, 2017
Blackfyre:

Talk na.....i want to hear what you have to say...undecided
Lolz.
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by AleAirHub(m): 4:28pm On Dec 30, 2017
Why will you in this modern world think that 1m is enough to set someone on platform that can generate millions annually....

I started my hustling with just 65k and but today the story different.....

May God Bless You cool [s]
Blackfyre:
Over one million naira at a betting promo and you think he has made it?....undecided

If you know what it truly means, you will be praying for that dude. Serious prayer for that matter....

Btw, if you know what's good for you, you will use that opportunity to cut him off. It's a blessing in disguise.

[/s]
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by zainmaxwell(m): 4:31pm On Dec 30, 2017
[quote author=cherriex post=63745163][/quote] sweet heart it depends on the role she played supposed she is good do u think he will do dat...... and besides what she is trying to say is that she is his goodluck

1 Like

Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by xendra: 4:31pm On Dec 30, 2017
Edonojie007:

See This One. And You Think Am Struggling?
I Wont Insult Your Parents,because From Your Comment,they Are So Useless To You,so Insulting Them Wont Hurt You,thats Why You Freely Insulted Mine. I Would Just Pity Them(SMH),cause They Already Have A Useless Daughter,whom Is A Professional Hoe. Pity.
Mine Have Been Useful To Me.
And They've Played A Very Big Part In My Success.
tcheww stupid fool. so you think you av arrived like that? not struggling my foot, everyone claims king on NL. keep sleeping at home then

mtchewww see face sef, like rat when stay house wen food no dey.
Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by mechanics(m): 4:31pm On Dec 30, 2017
Jman06:
See, a loyal man is he who would tell you the truth and nothing but the truth. He may not have a job, but he is of sound character and treats you right.
If he doesn't have money to live in a porshe apartment he would comfortably rent a face me i face you room, while he works hard to rent a better place. Now would you agree to date him in that room

He may not have money to buy those flashy clothes and shoes, so he wears the cheap Aba made ones and not try to steal his brother or uncle's wears to dress cute and impress you, tell yourself the truth, would you not dump him

He may not be a brother in the lord, but a freethinker or atheist and doesn't pretend to believe in God, would you accept him like that

He may not tell you that he loves you more than his mom because he knows that no reasonable man would love another person more than his own mom. But that doesn't mean he doesn't love you but not just as much as he loves his mom. Would you not rather go for that player that lied to you that he loves you more than his mom.

He may not be the loud and outgoing type, but reserved,shy and introverted but still intelligent. Would you not rather fall for that loud player with sugar coated tongue

Lastly, your loyal guy may not be 6ft tall, dark in complexion with 6packs, but could just be an average-looking guy, would you honestly reason that all that glitters is not gold and focus on his character and loyalty instead of looking for that "fine boy" player

Answer these questions honestly and then you would see why you may not be able to meet that loyal and honest man who would keep to his promises.
salient questions indeed.

1 Like

Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by groomed: 4:33pm On Dec 30, 2017
mikolo80:
stop ranting. If guy not loyal it means it's only kpekus you bring to the table. Sorry.
you are stupidd

3 Likes

Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by mechanics(m): 4:33pm On Dec 30, 2017
Jman06:
The summary of what i am trying to pass across to you is that you should always try to scrutinize the guys you go out with, so that you can be able to pick the nice guys who would be honest and loyal. The signs are always there that the guy is not honest but many ladies ignore those signs. Bye
I understand you bro.

1 Like

Re: Note To Women: Stand By Him At Owner's Risk by mechanics(m): 4:34pm On Dec 30, 2017
Espada121:
All this epistle na wash..she is now forming good girl as if she would be any different...The OP is just mad she didn't partake in squandering the millions
hahahahaha.

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