₦airaland Forum

hakm5:
she is gone. This situation happened to me exactly. The worst part of my own situation was that the neighbour guy was like our errand boy . Whenever I am not around .He always be with her. I warned to stop let him be around her whenever I am not around or going to him for charging ,resting or whatever. To cut the long story short,as a punishment I stopped calling for a month, the following month I saw on Facebook they engaged with my woman carrying two months pregnancy for the guy. This is the first time I am sharing this story. Too embarrassed to tell anyone.

alfredo4u:
Im a father of two......my daughter is four this while my son is one...

Donald3d:
My sister you wont understand ,
No matter how smart one is , or try to make things work , no matter how loving and kind you are if the other party is unwilling to give back love and care and respect nothing would work .
Marriage is beautiful , I am not scared of marriage , just scared of being with the wrong person .Too many pretenders these days .
May God help us

AllforJesus7:
Lol I understand you. There is nothing between you and the lady. You only flirt with her and she sent you a bill. Because you respect your home.

Same with your wife.

There is nothing between her and the neighbor. They only just flirt with each other and she sends him her bill and picks items from his fridge.

See?


Fact is you are just childish and immature like I said. What is good for the goose is good for the gander. The fact that an anonymous lady sends you a bill puts you in the same shoes with your wife. Both of you have issues. And I'm very much sure if we hear her own side of the story the opinion of many people here about you will change. They will see you in your true color.

Let the change begin with you. Grow up! When you do your wife will stop visiting neighbors.


Stay blessed.

onstelly:
ok now I understand, God won't even allow us to meet the wrong people.

Donald3d:
Not again , person come dey fear to marry na , una wey don marry just dey make person fear everyday .Shey I go marry like this sha ,chei
Anyway.....
Situations like this to be honest would be very hard to solve(she is unwilling to do anything about it) , this is why you should always make it clear the things you like and the things you dont like before marrrying your partner .

Your madam was very very very very wrong on all levels ,
1.She is not supposed to go to a single guys room and vice versa
2.She is not supposed to collect anything from him , You should be the one to go to him if your family needs his assistance.
3.The height of it is her inivting him to your house at night to watch match by 10pm !!!!, like what the ....

Now to your own part
-If she has not always being like this, then something is wrong , and its at the foundation
-How often do you and your wife do things together ?, because from the look of things , if you observe critically and psychologically , its not just about collecting things from him , and she also might not be cheating on you, the koko here is SHE ENJOYS HIS COMPANY.Thats why she finds it hard to stop .
-Is your wife your best friend ? , how do you correct her when she is wrong (by shouting or in a loving manner)
-How well do you tell her sweet words and comment on her beauty
-How well do you give her time just to listen to her
-I know its hard creating time for all these with work and everything but you have to try .
-Women love someone who makes them feel safe and alive, someone who listens to their fears and worries and anything they have to say -Be her friend !
-Have a heart to heart talk with her, tell her calmly why what she is doing is wrong .
-Never stop telling her you love her , even when you are angry with her
-Try and get her busy , so she would have less time to even think he exists
-Bring back respect into your home , not just her respecting you , but you also respecting her .She has obviously lost respect for you
-Above all while you take actions talk to God about everything .

Act fast , because that guy na sharp guy, he knows where you are lacking and he is capitalizing on it , thats the advantage side chicks and side guys always have over the main partner "filling the empty spaces"

No matter what you do ,use wisdom and be calm and loving about it
God bless your marriage


MODIFIED : Women please stop assuming your husband would automatically know what you are thinking or feeling , talk to him if you feel he is not doing something right , not all men are mind readers biko, sometimes he honestly has no clue what you need until you open up,same goes for men too

Abeg make una check my signature

hakm5:
she is gone. This situation happened to me exactly. The worst part of my own situation was that the neighbour guy was like our errand boy . Whenever I am not around .He always be with her. I warned to stop let him be around her whenever I am not around or going to him for charging ,resting or whatever. To cut the long story short,as a ppunishmentunishment I stopped calling for a month, the following month I saw on Facebook they engaged with my woman carrying two months pregnancy for the guy. This is the first time I am sharing this story. Too embarrassed to tell anyone.

alfredo4u:
I will try and make it brief...few month before I got my new job that took me out of my former location. During that period, I do all I can to make sure me and my family feed well and manage the way we can.

During that period, there is this guy in my neighborhood that my wife always confide in, at times she goes to his place to collect whatsoever she want in the guys fridge to eat. Which I warned her to stop doing and always manage what we have in the house with the children.

One night around 10:30pm, I caught her carrying things in her hand coming from the guys room, with that annoyance I slapped/kick her not minding the same guy coming at her back. Although, me and this guy do help each other whenever we do need each others help.

After that incident, I seriously warned her to stop entering any single guys apartment and to stop allowing guys into my apartment whenever I'm not around.

Just last two weeks, I called her around 10pm to wish her a wonderful night rest, during that call, I heard a voice in the background, I ask her who was that, only for her to tell me is the guy I asked her to stop entering my place whenever am not around. That he is watching match in my parlour. Immediately I banged the call.

The next morning, I called her and was correcting her of what she did, I asked her just one question 'what did she think the neighbours will say if they see him coming out of my place by that time of the night?......She started nagging on the phone and said she have her life to live, and I have mine and I can't stop her from the way she live her life....I now reminded her that I'm her husband and she should live to my expectations and abide by my rules, she said never. With that annoyance, I told her I will never send her feeding allowance to her again, that whenever she needs the children food, she should go to the supermarket across and collect their food. Although I do deposit cash for the children provisions up front.

Since that day, I stopped calling her and she never calls. Right now, I'm thinking of pulling my children away from her before she will corrupt the children.

House, pls kindly advise......pls if you don't have any useful advise, pls jump and pass ohhhhh. No insults pls

Donald3d:
Not again , person come dey fear to marry na , una wey don marry just dey make person fear everyday .Shey I go marry like this sha ,chei
Anyway.....
Situations like this to be honest would be very hard to solve(she is unwilling to do anything about it) , this is why you should always make it clear the things you like and the things you dont like before marrrying your partner .

Your madam was very very very very wrong on all levels ,
1.She is not supposed to go to a single guys room and vice versa
2.She is not supposed to collect anything from him , You should be the one to go to him if your family needs his assistance.
3.The height of it is her inivting him to your house at night to watch match by 10pm !!!!, like what the ....

Now to your own part
-If she has not always being like this, then something is wrong , and its at the foundation
-How often do you and your wife do things together ?, because from the look of things , if you observe critically and psychologically , its not just about collecting things from him , and she also might not be cheating on you, the koko here is SHE ENJOYS HIS COMPANY.Thats why she finds it hard to stop .
-Is your wife your best friend ? , how do you correct her when she is wrong (by shouting or in a loving manner)
-How well do you tell her sweet words and comment on her beauty
-How well do you give her time just to listen to her
-I know its hard creating time for all these with work and everything but you have to try .
-Women love someone who makes them feel safe and alive, someone who listens to their fears and worries and anything they have to say -Be her friend !
-Have a heart to heart talk with her, tell her calmly why what she is doing is wrong .
-Never stop telling her you love her , even when you are angry with her
-Try and get her busy , so she would have less time to even think he exists
-Bring back respect into your home , not just her respecting you , but you also respecting her .She has obviously lost respect for you
-Above all while you take actions talk to God about everything .

Act fast , because that guy na sharp guy, he knows where you are lacking and he is capitalizing on it , thats the advantage side chicks and side guys always have over the main partner "filling the empty spaces"

No matter what you do ,use wisdom and be calm and loving about it
God bless your marriage


MODIFIED : Women please stop assuming your husband would automatically know what you are thinking or feeling , talk to him if you feel he is not doing something right , not all men are mind readers biko, sometimes he honestly has no clue what you need until you open up,same goes for men too

Abeg make una check my signature

Donald3d:
Not again , person come dey fear to marry na , una wey don marry just dey make person fear everyday .Shey I go marry like this sha ,chei
Anyway.....
Situations like this to be honest would be very hard to solve(she is unwilling to do anything about it) , this is why you should always make it clear the things you like and the things you dont like before marrrying your partner .

Your madam was very very very very wrong on all levels ,
1.She is not supposed to go to a single guys room and vice versa
2.She is not supposed to collect anything from him , You should be the one to go to him if your family needs his assistance.
3.The height of it is her inivting him to your house at night to watch match by 10pm !!!!, like what the ....

Now to your own part
-If she has not always being like this, then something is wrong , and its at the foundation
-How often do you and your wife do things together ?, because from the look of things , if you observe critically and psychologically , its not just about collecting things from him , and she also might not be cheating on you, the koko here is SHE ENJOYS HIS COMPANY.Thats why she finds it hard to stop .
-Is your wife your best friend ? , how do you correct her when she is wrong (by shouting or in a loving manner)
-How well do you tell her sweet words and comment on her beauty
-How well do you give her time just to listen to her
-I know its hard creating time for all these with work and everything but you have to try .
-Women love someone who makes them feel safe and alive, someone who listens to their fears and worries and anything they have to say -Be her friend !
-Have a heart to heart talk with her, tell her calmly why what she is doing is wrong .
-Never stop telling her you love her , even when you are angry with her
-Try and get her busy , so she would have less time to even think he exists
-Bring back respect into your home , not just her respecting you , but you also respecting her .She has obviously lost respect for you
-Above all while you take actions talk to God about everything .

Act fast , because that guy na sharp guy, he knows where you are lacking and he is capitalizing on it , thats the advantage side chicks and side guys always have over the main partner "filling the empty spaces"

No matter what you do ,use wisdom and be calm and loving about it
God bless your marriage


MODIFIED : Women please stop assuming your husband would automatically know what you are thinking or feeling , talk to him if you feel he is not doing something right , not all men are mind readers biko, sometimes he honestly has no clue what you need until you open up,same goes for men too

Abeg make una check my signature

uboma:
What do you mean by this, divorce is not encouraged in my place....?


If what you reported in your first post is true, you have no business seeing her as your wife.


Being in a marriage isn't a do or die affair especially when your partner is acting this way.

Pataricatering:
take your kids how ? Their kids not his ! When will you guys learn that women now have rights and you can’t take kids away like your wife has no right to her own kids ?

Ganjafama:
That guy is already fvcking your wife and you are here saying this. I hate saying this but you have moral standing to divorce that woman. She has no iota of respect for your manhood. Take your kids to mum or sister and send the idiot away.

Agbaletu:
Don't make that mistake, even if you are going to divorce her, continue to give her until the day she leaves. Don't complicate the issue.

GAZZUZZ:
lost sittuation. You are not a man

It is not about money, or physical strength. Your wife is lost.

Do not bother salvaging this marriage, because it will not work.

IdeyFindWife:
that guy go don ride hin bicycle almost to pieces!

LadySarah:
First,ithe house is for the Both of you not yours alone.
secondly,your wife is supposed to restrict her comm with the said young man.why is she even going to collect food from him ?

SOLN: Get the intruders no,tell him in clear terms that you dont want him near your apartment or family again.(I'm assuming your wife refused to tell him and he is unaware of your grouse),so that When next you see the Both ,whstever you Do nobody will blame you.
Also understand that your wife is your partner not child and deserves respect .communicate with her As an adult and the issues will be sorted out.

HerXLNC:
Starving her of food is not the best way.... You just made matter worse.... Don't Tie her loyalty to the money you give her.... Because if she become financially independent she ll be defiant.... Rather seek counsel from those that are mature Enuf to scold her.... God bless your home.... This is too small to break your home

bigpicture001:
my take is that you saw it coming in the relationship, but chose to ignore it..u know, d dark patches on the leopard skin hardly washes off...you were crazy abt her and failed to do d necessary.to chech bak weda sh loves, nd respect u,wen u both were dating....d tin is dt..its ur fault marrying her,cuz sh has always been like dt..

Tohzara:
Abeg, no be by force. Marriage doesn't have to be a PRISON. I wonder what he's even gaining from it, that he'll have to be acting foolish and slaving himself just to preserve it. That doesn't make any sense.

His wife doesn't work. He's the one fending for her and the children. She flirts around with some bloke nextdoor (and probably has been fücked by that nigga). He probably has a dream for his own life, a goal in which he seeks fulfilment, yet he stresses himself to cater for a parasite, who still HURTS him despite that, and you're asking him to keep the marriage by all means?

Makes zero sense. Of what value is it? Why should he make that the most important thing in his life?

If it doesn't work, it doesn't work! Why man go stress himself for nothing. It's completely meaningless. Any woman who tries this with me is gone. That's the end.

One can't be struggling with life and still be struggling to keep a marriage. Life shouldn't be that hard. It's not compulsory.

Donald3d:
Not again , person come dey fear to marry na , una wey don marry just dey make person fear everyday .Shey I go marry like this sha ,chei
Anyway.....
Situations like this to be honest would be very hard to solve(she is unwilling to do anything about it) , this is why you should always make it clear the things you like and the things you dont like before marrrying your partner .

Your madam was very very very very wrong on all levels ,
1.She is not supposed to go to a single guys room and vice versa
2.She is not supposed to collect anything from him , You should be the one to go to him if your family needs his assistance.
3.The height of it is her inivting him to your house at night to watch match by 10pm !!!!, like what the ....

Now to your own part
-If she has not always being like this, then something is wrong , and its at the foundation
-How often do you and your wife do things together ?, because from the look of things , if you observe critically and psychologically , its not just about collecting things from him , and she also might not be cheating on you, the koko here is SHE ENJOYS HIS COMPANY.Thats why she finds it hard to stop .
-Is your wife your best friend ? , how do you correct her when she is wrong (by shouting or in a loving manner)
-How well do you tell her sweet words and comment on her beauty
-How well do you give her time just to listen to her
-I know its hard creating time for all these with work and everything but you have to try .
-Women love someone who makes them feel safe and alive, someone who listens to their fears and worries and anything they have to say -Be her friend !
-Have a heart to heart talk with her, tell her calmly why what she is doing is wrong .
-Never stop telling her you love her , even when you are angry with her
-Try and get her busy , so she would have less time to even think he exists
-Bring back respect into your home , not just her respecting you , but you also respecting her .She has obviously lost respect for you
-Above all while you take actions talk to God about everything .

Act fast , because that guy na sharp guy, he knows where you are lacking and he is capitalizing on it , thats the advantage side chicks and side guys always have over the main partner "filling the empty spaces"

No matter what you do ,use wisdom and be calm and loving about it
God bless your marriage


MODIFIED : Women please stop assuming your husband would automatically know what you are thinking or feeling , talk to him if you feel he is not doing something right , not all men are mind readers biko, sometimes he honestly has no clue what you need until you open up,same goes for men too

Abeg make una check my signature

alfredo4u:
Im a father of two......my daughter is four this while my son is one...

OneCorner:
Leave those men alone with ur wife na. Patapata, they will fvck her and at the end of d day, she's still yours again.

Abi wetin I talk no make sense ni

Rubbiish:
@bold u think so?