Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,150,927 members, 7,810,575 topics. Date: Saturday, 27 April 2024 at 11:23 AM

Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) - Romance - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) (43611 Views)

What Do You Say When A Girl Asks Where You Got Her Number From? / How Do You Say "I'm Having Sex" In Your Language? / How Do You Say " I LOVE YOU" In Your Indigenous Language? (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (Reply) (Go Down)

Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by generaliy: 9:51am On Mar 31, 2018
1. Aquatic spirits: These ones will make an ocean out of any meal, one cup of rice is to 25 litre of water, literally, they don't make Eba, they do "swimming cassava flakes".

2. Dead Sea: They have a covenant with salt, no living thing can survive if dropped in their pot of soup, Dangote salt recognises them yearly, they make the market boom.

3. Loud sounding cymbals: All noise and no substance, you can perceive the aroma of their foods from the Nigerian-Cameroon border, but that's where it ends, the taste will spoil your day and ruin your appetite.

4. Mixed culture: They are professional mixologists, they'll combine ancient Egyptian spices with local spices from the Nok culture, then garnish with ginger, garlic, tumeric, and all sorts of funny tasting blends, we should call them science students!

5. Silencers : These type can survive in any Nigerian private university hostel, Covenant, Babcock, Crawford, etc. Guess why? You never perceive anything, their meals are aroma non-compliant.

6. Kitchen imbeciles: May you never be unfortunate enough to meet one, their mama never allowed them in the kitchen once, they just stare confusingly, they can add okro to noodles, no kidding.

7. Credit thrift and loans: They're mostly from the south south, their meals leaves your account balance weeping uncontrollably, they can never manage, all sorts of animals must attend every pot session, with such ladies, you'll be "having the form of wealthiness but deny the power thereof!"

8. Village witches: Poverty is sunk deeply in their system, they are high performers with meals below 500 naira, they make local meals well, locust bean is their destiny partner, bitter leaf is always on the menu!

9. Cacophony of confusion: Just pity your unborn kids even if you're considering them for other purposes, they can add the oddest food combos, yam and rice, jollof rice and pettered beans, 24 vegetable varieties in one pot, lets not go on.

10. Wife materials(1,523,456 yards, quality Korean fabrics). They are high performers under any situation, they can make meals with 100 naira as well as 20,000 naira, food so perfect you think Angels supply their recipes, if you see one, cleave to her, even if she's the bone of your flesh!

Caveat: Advise taken at readers' risk, the writer is NOT liable for any inconveniences that may arise as a result of applying this piece, thank you.

307 Likes 27 Shares

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by generaliy: 9:52am On Mar 31, 2018

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by generaliy: 9:53am On Mar 31, 2018
Cc

Ishilove
Lalasticlala
Seun
Recitation
Farano
Supermods
Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Ishilove: 9:58am On Mar 31, 2018
The person who wrote this is an idiot. A sexist idiot

56 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Nobody: 10:01am On Mar 31, 2018
Ilesanmi Iyana Samuel. Iyana or Iyanu? Just want to know.
Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Nobody: 10:05am On Mar 31, 2018
Ishilove:
The person who wrote this is an idiot. A sexist idiot

128 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Heromaniaa: 10:07am On Mar 31, 2018
Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Nobody: 10:27am On Mar 31, 2018
A
Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by spyglaxx: 10:28am On Mar 31, 2018
I taught my wife how to cook stew. Nobody cooks better than me. I have now discovered ordinary cooking can scatter marriages.

101 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Nobody: 10:37am On Mar 31, 2018
generaliy:
[b]1. Aquatic spirits: These ones will make an ocean out of any meal, one cup of rice is to 25 litre of water, literally, they don't make Eba, they do "swimming cassava flakes".

2. Dead Sea: They have a covenant with salt, no living thing can survive if dropped in their pot of soup, Dangote salt recognises them yearly, they make the market boom.

3. Loud sounding cymbals: All noise and no substance, you can perceive the aroma of their foods from the Nigerian-Cameroon border, but that's where it ends, the taste will spoil your day and ruin your appetite.

4. Mixed culture: They are professional mixologists, they'll combine ancient Egyptian spices with local spices from the Nok culture, then garnish with ginger, garlic, tumeric, and all sorts of funny tasting blends, we should call them science students!

5. Silencers : These type can survive in any Nigerian private university hostel, Covenant, Babcock, Crawford, etc. Guess why? You never perceive anything, their meals are aroma non-compliant.

6. Kitchen imbeciles: May you never be unfortunate enough to meet one, their mama never allowed them in the kitchen once, they just stare confusingly, they can add okro to noodles, no kidding.

7. Credit thrift and loans: They're mostly from the south south, their meals leaves your account balance weeping uncontrollably, they can never manage, all sorts of animals must attend every pot session, with such ladies, you'll be "having the form of wealthiness but deny the power thereof!"

8. Village witches: Poverty is sunk deeply in their system, they are high performers with meals below 500 naira, they make local meals well, locust bean is their destiny partner, bitter leaf is always on the menu!

9. Cacophony of confusion: Just pity your unborn kids even if you're considering them for other purposes, they can add the oddest food combos, yam and rice, jollof rice and pettered beans, 24 vegetable varieties in one pot, lets not go on.

10. Wife materials(1,523,456 yards, quality Korean fabrics). They are high performers under any situation, they can make meals with 100 naira as well as 20,000 naira, food so perfect you think Angels supply their recipes, if you see one, cleave to her, even if she's the bone of your flesh!

Caveat: Advise taken at readers' risk, Ilesanmi Iyana Samuel is NOT liable for any inconveniences that may arise as a result of applying this piece, thank you.[/b]

Lol.
I like this.
But why you go get toto you no go sabi cook? Shey dem do you?

7 Likes

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by H2Ossss(m): 10:43am On Mar 31, 2018
hehehehehe
Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by McBrooklyn(m): 10:44am On Mar 31, 2018
cheesy
Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by generaliy: 11:08am On Mar 31, 2018
Ishilove:
The person who wrote this is an idiot. A sexist idiot

Ishilove calm please

This is just a joke, for humour and nothing more, haba.

46 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by daveP(m): 11:09am On Mar 31, 2018
Ishilove aren't you sensing his tone? lol


He's just having fun. Take it that way.


Peeps inspired by Tosyne. I hail.

9 Likes

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Timagex(m): 11:16am On Mar 31, 2018
angry angry grin grin grin grin cheesy wink
Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by BlackDBagba: 12:02pm On Mar 31, 2018
grin
Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by J2381: 2:51pm On Mar 31, 2018
generaliy:
Cc

Ishilove
Lalasticlala
Seun
Recitation
Farano
Supermods
LMAO!
Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by J2381: 2:52pm On Mar 31, 2018
Ishilove:
The person who wrote this is an idiot. A sexist idiot
chillax girl. You and I know there's an atom of truth in what the OP wrote. I for one have witnessed number 4. grin

23 Likes

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by coolestofall(m): 3:01pm On Mar 31, 2018
Ishilove:
The person who wrote this is an idiot. A sexist idiot

Y take it personal na, except ur cooking style is one of d styles on d list.

142 Likes 7 Shares

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Nobody: 3:04pm On Mar 31, 2018
Number 7, lmao grin.

5 Likes

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by ashewoboy(m): 3:25pm On Mar 31, 2018
Ishilove:
The person who wrote this is an idiot. A sexist idiot


you usually look for a way to bring SEX into any discussion. wetin bring sexist come this discussion now? where do you belong?

119 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Nobody: 4:02pm On Mar 31, 2018
I am a combination of Dead Sea, Mixed Spices and Kitchen slowpoke. Lethal just lethal. I will marry a man that can cook. It's not a woman's place to cook. I don't mind marrying a chef. tongue

10 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by OriakuAmara(f): 4:07pm On Mar 31, 2018
I love cooking.
It's fun.
cheesy cheesy

4 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by tunezvic(m): 4:14pm On Mar 31, 2018
Tednersy:
I am a combination of Dead Sea, Mixed Spices and Kitchen slowpoke. Lethal just lethal. I will marry a man that can cook. It's not a woman's place to cook. I don't mind marrying a chef. tongue
Holy Ghost fire.. I bind you in chisus name.. This one go kill person.

15 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Nobody: 4:14pm On Mar 31, 2018
The day i ate my friend's girlfriend beans i almost regretted my lifecheesy. The beans seed that was half done go one side... Red oil oil looking like the redsea also pack goin one side. And when u taste the beans na so d salt content for d beans just dey tingle ur teethcheesy.its like she pour two sacks of dangote's iodized salt inside the beans. Chai! Wen i taste two spoons of the endtime beans na so i tell my guy dat i am ok...make i no go get running stomachcheesy. Guys with girlfriends or wives dat don't know how to cook..biko teach dem how to cook make dem no fall una hands..its importantcheesy.

38 Likes

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Martin0(m): 4:19pm On Mar 31, 2018
lefulefu:
The day i ate my friend's girlfriend beans i almost regretted my lifecheesy. The beans seed that was half done go one side... Red oil oil looking like the redsea also pack goin one side. And when u taste the beans na so d salt content for d beans just dey tingle ur teethcheesy.its like she pour two sacks of dangote's iodine salt inside the beans. Chai! Wen i taste two spoons of the endtime beans na so i tell my guy dat i am ok...make i no go get running stomachcheesy. Guys with girlfriends or wives dat don't know how to cook..biko teach dem how to cook make dem no fall uwa hands..its importantcheesy.
hahahahah aah kikikikigringrin

chai u don kill me today oogrin

4 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Harddiskng(m): 6:31pm On Mar 31, 2018
generaliy:

6. Kitchen imbeciles:

Lmao cheesy

5 Likes

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by BossLaifay(f): 7:09pm On Mar 31, 2018
I am number 2 with blend of number 4 tongue
Only me understands the pleasure of the salt in my food. Lol

3 Likes

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Chommieblaq(f): 7:19pm On Mar 31, 2018
Ishilove:
The person who wrote this is an idiot. A sexist idiot
shocked shocked
Take it easy with the curse, it's obvious it's for humour sake, moreover truth dey the talk small angry

17 Likes

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by generaliy: 7:34pm On Mar 31, 2018
Lalasticlala
Mynd44

1 Like

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by ImaIma1(f): 8:46pm On Mar 31, 2018
Cooking is interesting. Just seeing food stuff in the market gets me excited cheesy

I already start thinking of the taste i wanna achieve

11 Likes

Re: Women And Their Cooking Styles (before You Say I Do) by Ishilove: 7:45pm On Apr 01, 2018
Chommieblaq:


shocked shocked
Take it easy with the curse, it's obvious it's for humour sake, moreover truth dey the talk small angry
I didn't find it funny. How can the op say 'poverty is sunk deeply in someone's system??' There are some things people shouldn't use to joke

6 Likes 2 Shares

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (Reply)

Friends Donate Money For Man To Marry Girlfriend Of 4 Years, Nigerians React / Pre-wedding Pictures Of Two Nairalanders / Malawian Prostitute Disgraces Man Publicly For Refusing To Pay After Sex. Photo

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 45
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.