₦airaland Forum

Chukazu:
I still can't see where she lied.


Withholding information from you is not the same thing as lying mbok

udemzyudex:
Search for @ntelcare on twitter and ask for where you can register your ntel sim in Lekki

kinibigdil:
@bolded she better be o, so because one is a graduate he shouldn't have relationship problems? Perfectly educated woman, professional relationship expert will ask to see both partner to give an advice on way forward, have you asked yourself if he has moved on since you are have already concluded, and did you or the lady drag him here to share his story and seek clarity... Yeye de smell. Spits on comment... Conductor drop me here! I no go again... @op abeg it is not every comment here you read to make meaningful decision o, just imagine sharing your story under Oshodi bridge, where the audience are all manner of people from different background and experiences, tomatoes sellers, shoe shinners lol and you will be forced to hear the one's whose voices are louder,? Guess who? Agbero's does that mean they are the right ones? No! But take time read through there is a word from wise one's take it and run with it, I will say this we don't have institutions that handles this cases professional, I don't know if Yaba left give relationship advice, churches are the ones I that does this, some of them de try but it is still not done by professional's, that is why regardless of wrong advise and bashing when you post your story on Nairaland I believe if comments like this one above is not the first youy see, lol you will get something here @ buske

kenlinzo:
You must always learn to respect the opinions of ur partner in a relationship if u want to succeed in it. She has given u the reason why she needed the number from u so why press further for unnecessary answer if u are not looking for an avenue to break-up with her. To me, the girl never did any thing wrong. U'r just been jealous unnecessarily. U have been with a girl for 3yrs now and u still don't trust her, the girl sef try to stay with u this long. Pls grow up and amend ur ways with her.

Even if u don't want to be dating/sleeping with a girl/boy again doesn't mean u should break up with her. Boy/girl relationship is not only for sex but for companionship.

Note: For the fact that u are dating a girl/guy doesn't make u a lord over her/him, it is only marriage that gives u the overall privilege over ur spouse..

Fearlez:
Your girl is a timebomb that will explode without her knowing it.

Let me paint a very ugly picture for you. Your girl is the type that is not only very very naive, she's what guys like us know as the type who are bad at saying no.

Add this to her docile, unassertive character, she's a relationship wrecking ball. You will be surprised how relatively firm and strong she is with girls but weak with men.

She's the type that won't really put up too much fight in sexual advances or wooing. Bad boys like her type alot and she isn't good for a sensitive person like you.

Another fact is when you asked her what she needed the number for and what friend of her needed it, she flipped ending the phone call on you... that's the red flag, if you're sharp. Getting angry and going so out of character to please a male friend whom you have long suspected proved your suspicion wasn't all together wrong.

And keeping secrets from you at the behest and on behalf of a male friend is tragedy in itself.

I paid particular attention on your post and discovered that when you accused her with the male friend, she flipped it around and accused you of breaking up with her over the phone. She isn't as naive as she appears though, and something tells me she wouldn't mind moving on.

Move on and be determined to forget her like last Christmas.

MrGift:
So true, my friend once dated a girl who was engaged, as in she Dey sample the ring Fo Hand. My Nigga will be banging her and her fiancé will call, bros with dick inside her puxxy she will answer her fiancée call and even tell him “I love you”
I think guys that fall in love are those who haven’t done some crazy stuff.. trust no babe, because an average girl doesn’t know what she wants so they can always be vulnerable.

david290:
Would've minded my business too like I've always done, and like someone did on first page. But somehow, I couldn't. So...
* Your issue might not particularly be a big deal. It isn't a trivial one either. Therefore I can say your concerns about your lady is very legit. Probe all you can now (or maybe not, if you don't have long term plans with her).
* You did nothing wrong. Or if somebody did something wrong, then it's the both of you. So, anybody pointing accusing fingers at you are just being insensitive or insincere.
* And please, (and am unapologetic about this one) anytime you see a "F" moniker here on Nairaland, by default subject such comments to thorough scrutiny. As you can see, it's only the "F" moniker with a username Cupie (not sure, actually) who bothered to address your post. Others were just getting unnecessarily emotional and defensive. While your lady mirror the offline lifestyle and personality of some of these "F" monikers, a handful of others, on the other hand, have taken it as a full-time job to defend anything feminine regardless of the context or circumstance.
* Trust and respect are two words that have been abused a lot. Take anyone using these words, offline or online, less seriously.
Some honestly don't know the meaning of these words. Others in fact, do, but have decided to cash on the fact that many don't. For the umpteenth time - trust and respect are not a given, they're earned! In plain English: those who should earn your trust and respect are those who didn't for once gave you a reason to doubt or disrespect them.
* Finally, the insinuation of a couple guys on the first page shouldn't be hastily disregarded before it's been carefully considered! Disagreements in relationships is fine. That's why I mentioned the other time that you aren't to be blamed for driving this matter to this juncture. At the very least, it quaked your relationship and gave it a direction so that you both won't be deceiving and wasting each each other's time.
A lot for relationships these days and if you're unfortunate to jam someone who's got a ph.D in deception and manipulation (not implying your lady is), ha!, let me just end it there.

YouareaBITCH:
Never trust those guys that advice u to
1.Bleep a girl and move on.
2.Don't love,it's childish
3.Every woman is a hoe don't give a damn about them.
4.Forget that bitch,she ain't loyal
Those guys are the very ones that worship their gf's in the room,they can't even talk back to their gf's when they speak,spend on them like Oyibo magas.Forming boss online. Na those kine guys deh mumu pass.



My advice 3 years is a long time for u both to give to urselves and just mess it up so casually.Go talk things out with ur girl. Their's a reason uv bin with her all these while.

YouareaBITCH:
Never trust those guys that advice u to
1.Bleep a girl and move on.
2.Don't love,it's childish
3.Every woman is a hoe don't give a damn about them.
4.Forget that bitch,she ain't loyal
Those guys are the very ones that worship their gf's in the room,they can't even talk back to their gf's when they speak,spend on them like Oyibo magas.Forming boss online. Na those kine guys deh mumu pass.



My advice 3 years is a long time for u both to give to ur selves and just mess it up so casually.Go talk things out with ur girl. Their's a reason uv bin with her all these while.

ekenzify:
bro if you are still following this thread,
the advice I would give to you is this. First of all, I want you to evaluate your relationship with God. Ask yourself the purpose of your relationship in the first place. Are you really ready to be in one. What's the long term plan for the relationship? Where would it lead to? Build yourself bro... Spiritually, financially, emotionally, and in your relationship with others.

Also be purpose driven.. Focus on becoming a better version of yourself each day. When you become your best self each day through the help of the Holy Spirit,
you will find yourself making decisions that you won't regret.

Still talk to your girlfriend about the situation, listen to her.. Don't be in a haste to interrupt and judge her.

Above all, let God be central in your life and you will find everything working well for you.

buske:
Like our minds were made out of each other. I must say I appreciate you for your keenness in reading my post.

I have this feeling she wouldn't mind moving on.... A reflection of it is how she thinks every quarrel is tantamount to a breakup .

However, I can't just throw away these three years....I'm still stunned as to my next line of action

Desluv:
Hear this, she is not cheating on you. She knew you'd over analyse things and end up accusing her of cheating and that's exactly what you did. She seems like a good girl. Value what you have before you loose it. Ignore about what many guys are saying here. They're only writing based on their awful experiences, which has absolutely nothing to do with you and your relationship. That many girls cheat, doesn’t mean your girl is cheating on you. When you find a good girl, protect her. Guard her. Know her worth, understand her value. Don’t let people or situation make you doubt how precious she is. Love her the way you found her, the way you just couldn’t take your eyes off her when you first saw her and how you kept thinking about her all night. Love her the way you did when all you wanted was to get her and what it took for you to win her heart. Love her even though at times you will not understand why she makes certain seemingly odd decisions.

Bro Give her a call and trash this out peacefully. You're two completely different people and that's okay. Different doesn’t bad. Your uniqueness forms the beauty of your relationship. You complement each other in more ways than you think. Don’t let trivial issues like this or advice from people you barely know ruin your relationship.

Ajapson:
You are such a disgrace to all women. A hypocrite and violence influencer. You shouldn't judge in a violence way, instead keep ypur dirty mouth shut

buske:
Shuu...Why are you getting all worked up?

My response to him wasn't meant to insult him. (at least if you compare my post, what he said and my response to him )

I know I might have messed up.. That's why I put up the post... Oops obviously.. You didn't read it!

You on the other hand seem to have anger issues too.
Did life teach you vile and anger Or do you have a personal problem with me

tgmservice:
This your story is too long and dull

Op your babe has given the money and phone you gave her to her main bf that is lashing her behind your back.

Its not new

jchemy1:
Enyi, you remember that phone she told you she gave to sombori dat she barely knows. And she even saved the money for 5months plus the money you made up for her,na the main bf be dat. You na side boob. Now will you get out of here and go and watch naija match

Iamdmentor1:
You should be 25 or older and you acted childishly You were very insecure and allowed your emotions get the better of you. You should have thought it through to the end.
You should have given her the number. If you think she's having an affair with someone, invite her over. Talk to her, and listen to her body language.

overall90:
It's like am the only one that is confused about the whole story.
@op,please how does her asking for Rev David number ended up being you finding out that she is cheating with a guy after so much dragging?

cooooooks:
Oboy, your English structure is quite poor. I can barely understand you.

giftlygifted:
The more you get old, the more you realise that even your poor parents are trying.

GIVE THEM ACCOLADES NOW BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE.






This Generation tire me
Girl to Girl..
Girl 1: I have a boyfriend now!
Girl 2: Is he cute?
Girl 3: Does he have money?...


Boy to Boy...
Boy 1: I got a new girlfriend now!!
Boy 2: She get yansh?
Boy 3: You don fxck her?...
I'm tired of this generation

buske:
I have been dating this girl, since after my graduation from the university three years ago. Prior to that we've were very close friends.

Our relationship has been the type where we know very much about each other. we talk about everything. We practically know each other in and out.

She's the very soft time, in the sense that she finds it hard to say no or shout at people irrespective of what they've done. To give you a picture of what I'm talking about, with a very confusing episode...a man once collected her phone and practically walked away with it in broad daylight without any form of resistance. Another episode; The other day, after waiting for about 5 months to get the complete amount to purchase a phone, she took the whole sum and gave it to a person she hardly knows and we've been looking for him ever since.

While I'm the analytical type of person. This has its own downsides too as atimes, I tend not to know when to just let things go.

Okay..Let me give you the main gist of what transpired so you can tell me if I could have reacted or done things better or it wasn't my fault.

So yesterday, she called me and was like "emmh..baby, can you give me Rev. David's number, I want to pass it to a friend who needs spiritual counseling" (Rev
David is my bossom friend who just got out of the Seminary, They two are hardly acquainted due to obvious reasons.) "aaah... I should give you Rev. David's number??...Wait who is the person?...doesn't he/she have a church/pastor he/she can go to?" I was perplexed by the request. Since we share a lot, I was expecting at least an overview of the reason for the request. My girlfriend became defensive instead," Are you giving me the number or not? ".. At this point, my interest is hightened. So I ask her to at least give me minor details about the person or the situation at hand. It became a drag and led to a slight argument. She got angry and for the first time in many years..cut the call on me.

"aaaah....what is the problem, what is making this girl get all worked up like this?" I called and called back but she didn't pick up. I was mad and confused.
Now, like I said at the beginning, besides the fact that we talked about everything...she is also the type that can easily be defrauded. So this made me put up guard and she is ignited my interest in the case by her dodgy attitude.

So I sent her a text, giving her one last chance to pick my call and threatened to never call again if she failed to. So she called!

After dragging the issue for long and lying(something she's never done) here and there. I got to find out that it was about a guy whom I was suspecting she was having an affair with. (she never knew I was suspecting her though because I never showed it. I was looking for the perfect time to make a case)

I was mad!

After dropping the call. She texted me. Disclaiming having an affair with him, telling me that he had made her promise that it should be just between them.

See...This is a girl that tells me everything about her friends...from the friend who just had an abortion, to the one who almost had her womb removed, to the one whose parents are quarreling, to the one cheating on her boyfriend and so on. Why was this case so special that I couldn't even get a hint??.

I replied, telling her that I never believed her and told her I wasn't going to call her again and that she shouldn't bother calling me. Next thing I know, she turns it on me, accusing me of breaking up with her over the phone. She had repeated this accusation in the past. So I told her that since she's so 'eager' about us breaking up over the phone, her prayers had finally been answered today..I didn't reply any messages henceforth.

Now I'm confused, I don't know what to make out of this episode.

buske:
How comes you're just one out of many?
What did you smoke before reading it?

cooooooks:
Even your response is grammatically incorrect.

buske:
Thank you English man. I hope the queen of England has knighted you for your mastery of English!?!
Rubbish!

cooooooks:
"queen" should be Queen and "English man" should be Englishman.

tetula123:
relationship lately is starting to feel like a chore.

Emytea:
yes

PrinceCEE:
Show me the way to make the 500k - 1m naira. I'm ready to quit my own relationship...

Khutie:
•••Where are yhu??

hkidola00:
ur last statement, OK so u plan to marry a girl, so just cos ur not married yet means she can hoe around or flirt as she likes, what if she contracts something bad in d process now and later passes it to d guy later in marriage,i feel u have to lord over a girl also in dating oo, so wot can u say to this?