₦airaland Forum

ImaIma1:
You speak French?

I wish

ahnie:
Imagine the daft throwing jabs at you.i so 8 this dunce eeh.

look At Your Life

Dami12345:
I was pissed at this reply, you say the husband should take the lead , then what the fucvk should the lady do at home, she's just lying about, is it the man who is working should still be taking care of the child, even worse he should also be worried over the child because he knows that should the child be drowning the lady wouldn't even know?

If you fear your wife I guess the best thing to do is anything she says, like this woman here suggested.

You think every woman is the lazy a.as bitches you are used to. The one that is docile and does nothing but press phone at home. Bullcrap. If you jam a workaholic like me then you better take the lead in childrearing cos I won't be making money for the family, coming home tired to be worried about the minute things the kids do while their dad has more time on his hand to tell me sh!t.

Justasking247! Look At What Cococandy said... Get A Plastic Fence for Your Child...

You Can Use It In Your Sitting Room. Stretch It Round Yourself And The Child while You Watch Tv so As To Keep Her Within Sight... Thats The Solution. These Kids Dont Know Danger and Can Walk Right Into It...

JoannaSedley:
You think every woman is the lazy a.as bitches you are used to. The one that is docile and does nothing but press phone at home. Bullcrap. If you jam a workaholic like me then you better take the lead in childrearing cos I won't be making money for the family, coming home tired to be worried about the minute things the kids do while their dad has more time on his hand to tell me sh!t.

I'm a natural workaholic, if we jam, it will be on the highway, and I'll run you over.
Besides , I can never be among all those weak men you surround yourself with to feel good.

Dami12345:
I'm a natural workaholic, if we jam, it will be on the highway, and I'll run you over.
Besides , I can never be among all those weak men you surround yourself with to feel good.

..

Dami12345:
This is horrible and bad advise. This will only lead to divorce eventually, because someone out there will apply a firm hand to her and that the end of the marriage.
She should find a job and start sleeping around abi?
Am nota saying she shouldn't work but there must be some discipline first and fear of the husband, " even the bible says we should fear God"

Self control comes from such a healthy fear, she has to know that their are repercussions to her actions, besides I would rather have to replace all her clothes than have to visit the grace of my child, look at dbanj now, am guessing the op doesn't want to feel that way.

What has fear of God got to do with a careless mother and sleeping around in this case? Is the husband a masquerade that she should fear him? She will soon turn to witch too so he can fear her.
So all women who work and have a job sleep around? No housewife sleeps around? It's a pity you have no positive female role models around you. Shame really. But I know for a fact that there are women who work and don't sleep around. I have also seen housewives who stay at home, and still have lovers.
The OP has never complained about the integrity of his wife, so don't project your issues on him. He has a careless wife, possibly detached and unemotional. Or her parenting skills may just be differnt from the normal.
Drowning accidents happen more commonly even abroad despite supervision of children. It takes less than 30 seconds for a child to drown . Children and even adults have drowned in a full swimming pool surrounded by lifeguards and other adults, and were not noticed.
It's just one of the accidents that can happen. That's why it's important that in homes with pools where there are children, there should be a gated pool. Also more importantly, they should start teaching such children how to swim. Some kids are being taught as early as 1 year now.

Dami12345:
I'm in a good mood so it's free advice time .

Look op, there is wat everybody fears or respects,
Find it and use it to modify your wife behavior.

For instance, if she keeps treating your baby like that, rather than talk to her, just keep quiet, wait a few minutes call her attention,
You know she won't respond, just walk up to her slowly take her phone, yes the one she is always using rather than take care of her child, and put the phone in a cup of water, take the child and take care of her.

Should your wife complaint, allow her to talk finish, don't interrupt, just stare at her softly and quietly tell her, that the next time she makes you angry enough, her clothes will burn( remember quietly say this) never shout, then walk away.

I can assure you she will change,

Women respond yo actions not words,
From now, dont shout on her, she will keep watching because she won't know how bad you will hurt her if you are angry,

Why hit a woman when you can control her, with less than 1/2 the effort, and it case she misbehaves, tell her the clothes will burn, then walk away wait a week then make a nice pile of her clothes and shoes, put enough kerosene and wait for her before burning tell her that " since she can't hear, you wanted to burn just the clothes but your burning the shoes in advance for her next crime.

You're not married ...and you're mad

JustAsking247:
Help: My Wife is So Careless with Our Kid….!!!

Her attitude is seriously driving me crazy!
She seems to have totally different ways of treating a child from mine!
I'm not the type that can stand my kid cry and cry for long without comforting her (by the way our daughter is just 17months)! I always try to comfort her in some way whereas my wife will just ignore her and let her cry her eyes out.
Our kid can playfully wander away from my wife’s presence and my wife wouldn’t even notice until either the baby would make a sound from a distance or cry in pain from falling off or something falling on her. Then rather than rush to her rescue, sometimes my wife would remain on her seat and yell at the little girl to walk back to her. The day I was at home and witnessed this particular attitude, I almost tore my wife apart but for the intervention of my younger sister who came visiting that weekend.
We had a house assistant who was helping with the house chores and taking care of the kid (and the poor girl was doing pretty well) but my wife kept complaining about everything plus beating until the girl reported to her siblings who ordered her back to the village. Now with no house assistant, I have become the babysitter.
I feel ashamed to say that my wife doesn't deserve to have kids if she's going to ‘care’ for them like this.
I've tried talking to her but she always gets upset, walks out on me and complains or reports to everyone who cares to listen. And nothing changes!

Please Dont mind the drama book @Dami12345 is advicing ...he or she isn't married yet and doesn't understand the sensitivity of a woman...let alone how difficult it is to change a person.

My advice to you is if you have the space in your living room ...create a play area with barricade similar to the ones we see inside Mr Biggs which they keep for kids ...it might cost u some money to buy a home sized one in which she can keep the child with lots of toys whenever she wants to press her phone. And tell your wife why u bought it ...because you Dont want your child to fall inside swimming pool out of her carelessness. If she is truely a phone person she must have heard dbanjs story.

Then ask God to take control ...hoping that the child out grows this immediate danger in another 7 months by which time she can talk and obey some instructions.

Take control if you have the money to do this...Dont blame her carelessness ...becos accident can happen to any child even at school when your careless wife is not there. So just take control. God be with your family.

And pls Dont burn any bodies cloths or shoes to prove that you are the man biko!

The job of raising a child or children is between mom and dad not village house help.
Op, roll up your sleeves and take care of that child! Let your wife learn from you. Leave no responsibility for no one.
Until you and wifey get your acts together and put this child first, use condom.
One child is this hard for you, imagine two!

jaksmillioniar:
just shut up hippocrate dont let me get mad at u is it not a stupid mother dat born and yet refuse to take care of d baby u neva see were d guy type d housegirl d wife alwz beat her is it right coco. d guy is worried about his baby u are sayin rubbish wat if she swallow tin dat poison her or cause sickness d man shd live his work and be clearing house abi why madam carry leg up to watch tv.

eyinjuege:
What has fear of God got to do with a careless mother and sleeping around in this case? Is the husband a masquerade that she should fear him? She will soon turn to witch too so he can fear her.
So all women who work and have a job sleep around? No housewife sleeps around? It's a pity you have no positive female role models around you. Shame really. But I know for a fact that there are women who work and don't sleep around. I have also seen housewives who stay at home, and still have lovers.
The OP has never complained about the integrity of his wife, so don't project your issues on him. He has a careless wife, possibly detached and unemotional. Or her parenting skills may just be differnt from the normal.
Drowning accidents happen more commonly even abroad despite supervision of children. It takes less than 30 seconds for a child to drown . Children and even adults have drowned in a full swimming pool surrounded by lifeguards and other adults, and were not noticed.
It's just one of the accidents that can happen. That's why it's important that in homes with pools where there are children, there should be a gated pool. Also more importantly, they should start teaching such children how to swim. Some kids are being taught as early as 1 year now.

I wish I could challenge you to juris macho

EkoErrands:
You're not married ...and you're mad

Matter of fact I am, 4 years now,
No issues and she is a tiger.

Most of you people are just cowards and soft, your children will be worse anyway romance your weakness because you fear police and public opinion.

Dami12345:
I'm in a good mood so it's free advice time .

Look op, there is wat everybody fears or respects,
Find it and use it to modify your wife behavior.

For instance, if she keeps treating your baby like that, rather than talk to her, just keep quiet, wait a few minutes call her attention,
You know she won't respond, just walk up to her slowly take her phone, yes the one she is always using rather than take care of her child, and put the phone in a cup of water, take the child and take care of her.

Should your wife complaint, allow her to talk finish, don't interrupt, just stare at her softly and quietly tell her, that the next time she makes you angry enough, her clothes will burn( remember quietly say this) never shout, then walk away.

I can assure you she will change,

Women respond yo actions not words,
From now, dont shout on her, she will keep watching because she won't know how bad you will hurt her if you are angry,

Why hit a woman when you can control her, with less than 1/2 the effort, and it case she misbehaves, tell her the clothes will burn, then walk away wait a week then make a nice pile of her clothes and shoes, put enough kerosene and wait for her before burning tell her that " since she can't hear, you wanted to burn just the clothes but your burning the shoes in advance for her next crime.

Jisos!

Dami12345:
Matter of fact I am, 4 years now,
No issues and she is a tiger.

Most of you people are just cowards and soft, your children will be worse anyway romance your weakness because you fear police and public opinion.

I usually Dont argue with mad people but let's see how strong you really are the day a scorned woman pours you acid while you are sleeping!....Continue

EkoErrands:
I usually Dont argue with mad people but let's see how strong you really are the day a scorned woman pours you acid while you are sleeping!....Continue

Lol, fear! You are pathetic.
Your so afraid of living that you forget to live.

You disgust me, weak men everywhere.

JustAsking247:
As for my wife's unemotional attitude, like someone said, I found out that was the way she was brought up by an uncaring dad who had several women as wives and lots of 'abandoned' kids for their mothers to care for. Her mother had to over-labour herself to keep up. (By the way her mom passed on 2years ago (may her soul RIP).

Each time i try to speak with her, I always remind her that the world has moved beyond the days of our parents.
That cos her parent were that 'careless' doesn't mean she should be with her kids. Infact, I expected her to make up her mind to give her kids the best that her own parent couldn't afford- Her attention.

My own dad was a semi-tiger while growing up and also a chronic wife-batter, but I made up my mind never to touch my wife (the temptation though) or be the kind of dad he was to us. Mom in spite of the stress he made her go thru was still there for us and never made us see life from the negative angle.

Get your wife psychological help to get over her childhood. That's the only way you can move forward.

Also, taking care of a child is the responsibility of both man and woman. If you're around, you need to pick up the slack, even more so now that you know your wife is careless. If your child wanders away, to after her . . If she cries, pick her up and pet her. Don't wait for your wife to do everything. You can 'teach' her by your actions.

People assume just because a woman carried a child for 9months she ought to be able to nurture him with love and care. Well it's not always that way. Some women are broken, some just don't have what it takes . . . You just have to make the best of any situation you find yourself.

Dami12345:
Lol, fear! You are pathetic.
Your so afraid of living that you forget to live.

You disgust me, weak men everywhere.

May you not end up on Nairaland with 3rd degree burns one day...may the Lord continue to protect you especially your face and genitals in Jesus Name...Amen!

crackhaus:
Nigerian-styled parenting AKA we'll figure it out and learn on the job once the babies start coming... this is the problem you're facing now.

Before you both decided to start having kids, did you actually sit down to talk about and reach an agreement on the style of parenting you both would like to adopt, or was it just too much to bother about?

Talk to your wife man.

I was about to say the exact same thing.

sorry bro, you will keep talking to her or u can report her to her mum[/quote]Best advice

Dami12345:
I'm in a good mood so it's free advice time .

Look op, there is wat everybody fears or respects,
Find it and use it to modify your wife behavior.

For instance, if she keeps treating your baby like that, rather than talk to her, just keep quiet, wait a few minutes call her attention,
You know she won't respond, just walk up to her slowly take her phone, yes the one she is always using rather than take care of her child, and put the phone in a cup of water, take the child and take care of her.

Should your wife complaint, allow her to talk finish, don't interrupt, just stare at her softly and quietly tell her, that the next time she makes you angry enough, her clothes will burn( remember quietly say this) never shout, then walk away.

I can assure you she will change,

Women respond yo actions not words,
From now, dont shout on her, she will keep watching because she won't know how bad you will hurt her if you are angry,

Why hit a woman when you can control her, with less than 1/2 the effort, and it case she misbehaves, tell her the clothes will burn, then walk away wait a week then make a nice pile of her clothes and shoes, put enough kerosene and wait for her before burning tell her that " since she can't hear, you wanted to burn just the clothes but your burning the shoes in advance for her next crime.

This advice get as e be. What if it's a woman that goes extreme too, won't she retaliate even with worse actions. This should be relative. I think by understand a person we can dish out actions.

Op, is your wife fat... please activate her by getting her something doing, if she ain't doing anything now, is she good and responsive in doing other things?

I want to get married soon.