jaksmillioniar:
just shut up hippocrate dont let me get mad at u is it not a stupid mother dat born and yet refuse to take care of d baby u neva see were d guy type d housegirl d wife alwz beat her is it right coco. d guy is worried about his baby u are sayin rubbish wat if she swallow tin dat poison her or cause sickness d man shd live his work and be clearing house abi why madam carry leg up to watch tv.

Learn to stay your lane!!!!! Stop mentioning people that careless about you. I wonder why you can't stay on your lane.

cococandy:
Learn to type legibly

I can’t tell if you’re having a seizure or not. What’s this?

Hahahaha
Coco, na your paddy you dey yab o.
He's your bestie na

.

@op
Babies that age are hyper active from the crawling stage.its the duties of the mother to always keep watch over the child.your wife was careless,yeah very careless.how can your child wander from your sight,and you seem non challant about it.how does she even feels!

LET YOUR WIFE GET A JOB! she's not making good use of her Full house wife material! Register your child in a nursery (at least you're sure of the service you're paying for)

Someone has explained better in page 0

Nothing in my post is expensive to do. Because it’s not a common practice doesn’t mean it can’t be done. Maybe we need to talk about it more so people can know about those options.

And I didn’t say to not check on them. It’s just impractical to expect one to have an eye on the child 24/7. If he’s working and there’s no house help, will she cook, go to the toilet or even bath?
That’s when such things come in handy. With a simple plastic child fence, a toddler can be quarantined into one section of the house with their favorite toys. while the Mom takes care of the house or even takes care of herself instead of being 100 percent exhausted all the time trying to prove good mom that no one is going to give her an award for.

Many of us survived not because our mothers were perfect. We survived because of sheer good luck.

ImaIma1:


You think an average person in Nigeria does child proof in their houses? What of those that don't have the means to do all that you mentioned?

A mother cannot afford to be careless. Tragedy strikes without warning.

Some Sundays back a neighbour lost her son. A faulty standing fan shocked her sons. One jumped up and she told him to sleep elsewhere and she failed to check on the other son till daybreak not knowing that he had been electrocuted. People blamed her for being careless especially knowing that the fan was faulty.

Even with child proof, we can't just allow them wander without checking on them. I have seen mothers like the Ops wife. In my former street (ghetto setting) a child crawled onto the street and was crushed by a Coca-Cola truck.

People need to mind their children. Though ultimately, it is God who protects them.

eyinjuege:


Hahahaha
Coco, na your paddy you dey yab o.
He's your bestie na

There’s something off about that fellow

One minute sweet and one minute sour . With eye-hurting grammar to go with it.

dingbang:
one thing is to say something, and another thing is to act it. I just hope when you become a mother, you will live up to the emboldened

Mind your business, dude!
No matter what. No matter what. I'll never careless. Now run!

Extreme case of laziness.

Dami12345:
I'm in a good mood so it's free advice time .

Look op, there is wat everybody fears or respects,
Find it and use it to modify your wife behavior.

For instance, if she keeps treating your baby like that, rather than talk to her, just keep quiet, wait a few minutes call her attention,
You know she won't respond, just walk up to her slowly take her phone, yes the one she is always using rather than take care of her child, and put the phone in a cup of water, take the child and take care of her.

Should your wife complaint, allow her to talk finish, don't interrupt, just stare at her softly and quietly tell her, that the next time she makes you angry enough, her clothes will burn( remember quietly say this) never shout, then walk away.

I can assure you she will change,

Women respond yo actions not words,
From now, dont shout on her, she will keep watching because she won't know how bad you will hurt her if you are angry,

Why hit a woman when you can control her, with less than 1/2 the effort, and it case she misbehaves, tell her the clothes will burn, then walk away wait a week then make a nice pile of her clothes and shoes, put enough kerosene and wait for her before burning tell her that " since she can't hear, you wanted to burn just the clothes but your burning the shoes in advance for her next crime.

bruh which Bollywood movie have you been watching? Abeg pass me the DVD.

dingbang:
Biko Bros, I wonder if you knew your woman in and out before marrying her

Der no d sabi woman finish o.

Thanks guys for all the comments atleast have picked a thing or two from comments.

About her getting a job, No she has a good job. I'm an entrepreneur with few businesses setup before i married her so she's Oga's wife/madam in the companies. She manages one in particular and goes there daily to monitor activities. Cash's not a problem.

About hiring another nanny, well i tried after the girl left but madam can't stand the presence of another lady in the house. Haba! just say you want to bring your girlfriend to live with us,,,,,,she'll roar. Suspicions upon suspicions. Ok choose a girl of you choice and put her on the pay list like the previous but its taking forever cos she does not want to bring a 'witch' or someone that will come and 'steal' her man.

The previous house assistant was from her hometown.

yettymuse:
LET YOUR WIFE GET A JOB! she's not making good use of her Full house wife material! Register your child in a nursery (at least you're sure of the service you're paying for)

Someone has explained better in page 0

lastmessenger:
bruh which Bollywood movie have you been watching? Abeg pass me the DVD.

I actually do stuff like this with girls, I realised that girls like the rollacoster of love, they love their man being unpredictable, they love seeing shades of you, hence the drama, I prefer to just say something but talk is cheap to a woman, show her wat you mean,
Besides I hate Bollywood movies, all I like about them are the hot ladies.

JoannaSedley:
If she is unemotional to her own child she will maim and kill you if you try to physically correct her or burn her stuff as someone suggested. You are there to strike a balance. If she is not caring you can take the lead.
Or maybe you married an underage age girl who is practically a baby herself, who probably is seeing the poor child as her sibling that can be taken care of by someone else.
Same way wife supplement their husband's income is the same way this issue should be handled. Supplement with your own affection.
Some of us grew up in homes where showing of affections is seen as a sign of weakness. It may not be that she does not care rather that's how she was brought up.
Was she forced to marry you or did you forced her to marry you cos some of those hatred/ bitterness are often transfered. Spare me " the she birthed the child so she must love it bullcraps". Hate transcends love and beclouds sound jugdements and reasoning.

I was pissed at this reply, you say the husband should take the lead , then what the fucvk should the lady do at home, she's just lying about, is it the man who is working should still be taking care of the child, even worse he should also be worried over the child because he knows that should the child be drowning the lady wouldn't even know?

If you fear your wife I guess the best thing to do is anything she says, like this woman here suggested.

mimimile93:


Whatsoever happens to hiring a nanny..

Learn from D'banj's wife.

While I sympathize with them over the loss and wouldn't put blames on anyone, I feel couples should learn to speak out or get help whenever they notice anything odd to avoid putting our kids on harms way

Prevention they say is better than cure

Again, those who know how to teach couples concerning kids-care should be inspired to teach more. Churches/Doctors (Pediatricians) should be more concern as well..

eyinjuege:
I doubt if your wife can ever change until some life changing event happens to her or your family.
Some people are generally careless and lazy.
I'm sure you've spoken to her several times about it and nothing has changed.
My advice- register your child in a day care, and allow your wife go look for employment if she is jobless . Make sure it's a day care that opens early enough to drop her off on your way to work and stays open till evening when you can pick her up from work. It is what it is.
Meanwhile, to those saying you should use an aggressive or passive aggressive manner to resolve things like burning her property, that's an offence by law. If she also decides to take the law into her own hands and burn all your documents and clothes, you will have only yourself to blame and realise it wasn't worth it at the end.

This is horrible and bad advise. This will only lead to divorce eventually, because someone out there will apply a firm hand to her and that the end of the marriage.
She should find a job and start sleeping around abi?
Am nota saying she shouldn't work but there must be some discipline first and fear of the husband, " even the bible says we should fear God"

Self control comes from such a healthy fear, she has to know that their are repercussions to her actions, besides I would rather have to replace all her clothes than have to visit the grace of my child, look at dbanj now, am guessing the op doesn't want to feel that way.

ImaIma1:


You think an average person in Nigeria does child proof in their houses? What of those that don't have the means to do all that you mentioned?

A mother cannot afford to be careless. Tragedy strikes without warning.

Some Sundays back a neighbour lost her son. A faulty standing fan shocked her sons. One jumped up and she told him to sleep elsewhere and she failed to check on the other son till daybreak not knowing that he had been electrocuted. People blamed her for being careless especially knowing that the fan was faulty.

Even with child proof, we can't just allow them wander without checking on them. I have seen mothers like the Ops wife. In my former street (ghetto setting) a child crawled onto the street and was crushed by a Coca-Cola truck.

People need to mind their children. Though ultimately, it is God who protects them.

Respects my lady.

yettymuse:
LET YOUR WIFE GET A JOB! she's not making good use of her Full house wife material! Register your child in a nursery (at least you're sure of the service you're paying for)

Someone has explained better in page 0

Sometimes I wonder how short sighted people are.
Okay let's say he registered the child in a day care, its day care right, not everyfvucking hour care, so he has to pick up the child, take the child home and look after the child while at home, no sleep , no rest and of course if he brings and work home he can't do it, and for how long will he do this, imagine the day he needs the wife to take the child to day care? She would forget, maybe when he travels he has to take the child alone.

Funny enough what use is the wife again, wouldn't it be saner to divorce her and get a house maid who will perform all duties??

As for my wife's unemotional attitude, like someone said, I found out that was the way she was brought up by an uncaring dad who had several women as wives and lots of 'abandoned' kids for their mothers to care for. Her mother had to over-labour herself to keep up. (By the way her mom passed on 2years ago (may her soul RIP).

Each time i try to speak with her, I always remind her that the world has moved beyond the days of our parents.
That cos her parent were that 'careless' doesn't mean she should be with her kids. Infact, I expected her to make up her mind to give her kids the best that her own parent couldn't afford- Her attention.

My own dad was a semi-tiger while growing up and also a chronic wife-batter, but I made up my mind never to touch my wife (the temptation though) or be the kind of dad he was to us. Mom in spite of the stress he made her go thru was still there for us and never made us see life from the negative angle.

Dami12345:


Sometimes I wonder how short sighted people are.
Okay let's say he registered the child in a day care, its day care right, not everyfvucking hour care, so he has to pick up the child, take the child home and look after the child while at home, no sleep , no rest and of course if he brings and work home he can't do it, and for how long will he do this, imagine the day he needs the wife to take the child to day care? She would forget, maybe when he travels he has to take the child alone.

Funny enough what use is the wife again, wouldn't it be saner to divorce her and get a house maid who will perform all duties??

kindly direct your anger and aggression to the original poster! You're not even the husband here but you don begin mop lagoon for another person matter! He should divorce his wife and marry you Common gerrrrrrrrrrrahere!!!

yettymuse:
kindly direct your anger and aggression to the original poster! You're not even the husband here but you don begin mop lagoon for another person matter! He should divorce his wife and marry you Common gerrrrrrrrrrrahere!!!

You are a fooool, simple,
He asked for advice I gave my view, I wouldn't even bother if not that a child's life might hang in the balance, the lady means little to me, it's the child who matters.
In later years should the child start joining bad gang the parents would be blamed and rightly so because I don't understand how a child should learn the right way to behave in a day care or in the hands of a nanny, who can shower love on a child more than the parents?? And if they don't won't that child feel lost? All this are problems of the future IF the child even survives infancy.

Dami12345:


This is horrible and bad advise. This will only lead to divorce eventually, because someone out there will apply a firm hand to her and that the end of the marriage.
She should find a job and start sleeping around abi?
Am nota saying she shouldn't work but there must be some discipline first and fear of the husband, " even the bible says we should fear God"

Self control comes from such a healthy fear, she has to know that their are repercussions to her actions, besides I would rather have to replace all her clothes than have to visit the grace of my child, look at dbanj now, am guessing the op doesn't want to feel that way.

the way you people think Sha. it's funny.

Dami12345:


Lol, the Lady obviously doesn't fear or respect the man, if it's not curbed soon she may sleep around or bring shame to him.

Besides it's his house, he should put down ground rules, if she doesn't want the maid she should work, tell this to her,and tell her that you will look for a pretty maid, quietly say this, and then tell her that the maid will be her replacement eventually if she allows it.

All this in a quiet voice, and watch your wife kiss, hug, bribe and beg just to have her way.

Adviser aye!!

Dami12345:


I actually do stuff like this with girls, I realised that girls like the rollacoster of love, they love their man being unpredictable, they love seeing shades of you, hence the drama, I prefer to just say something but talk is cheap to a woman, show her wat you mean,
Besides I hate Bollywood movies, all I like about them are the hot ladies.

guy you never gam stubborn woman

dingbang:
she will pour fuel on him and light him up..

; LWKMD

“Discipline and fear”


Are talking about married partners or an authoritative father and an wild child? Even kids shouldn’t fear their parents much less a woman fearing a man she willingly married.

Some of una need brain scan sometimes

Dami12345:


This is horrible and bad advise. This will only lead to divorce eventually, because someone out there will apply a firm hand to her and that the end of the marriage.
She should find a job and start sleeping around abi?
Am nota saying she shouldn't work but there must be some discipline first and fear of the husband, " even the bible says we should fear God"

Self control comes from such a healthy fear, she has to know that their are repercussions to her actions, besides I would rather have to replace all her clothes than have to visit the grace of my child, look at dbanj now, am guessing the op doesn't want to feel that way.

You’re only looking for people who will help you bash your wife. If you like don’t pick solution from feasible options you have on here.

When she’s managing one of your so called companies, who’s watching the baby?

JustAsking247:
As for my wife's unemotional attitude, like someone said, I found out that was the way she was brought up by an uncaring dad who had several women as wives and lots of 'abandoned' kids for their mothers to care for. Her mother had to over-labour herself to keep up. (By the way her mom passed on 2years ago (may her soul RIP).

Each time i try to speak with her, I always remind her that the world has moved beyond the days of our parents.
That cos her parent were that 'careless' doesn't mean she should be with her kids. Infact, I expected her to make up her mind to give her kids the best that her own parent couldn't afford- Her attention.

My own dad was a semi-tiger while growing up and also a chronic wife-batter, but I made up my mind never to touch my wife (the temptation though) or be the kind of dad he was to us. Mom in spite of the stress he made her go thru was still there for us and never made us see life from the negative angle.

cococandy:
Nothing in my post is expensive to do. Because it’s not a common practice doesn’t mean it can’t be done. Maybe we need to talk about it more so people can know about those options.

And I didn’t say to not check on them. It’s just impractical to expect one to have an eye on the child 24/7. If he’s working and there’s no house help, will she cook, go to the toilet or even bath?
That’s when such things come in handy. With a simple plastic child fence, a toddler can be quarantined into one section of the house with their favorite toys. while the Mom takes care of the house or even takes care of herself instead of being 100 percent exhausted all the time trying to prove good mom that no one is going to give her an award for.

Many of us survived not because our mothers were perfect. We survived because of sheer good luck.

I think awareness has to be created about child proofing here. So that the child can play freely and explore in the area we have cordoned for them.

Children are attracted to wires, switches and many electrical items that are dangerous. How many times will we see them go there. And i don't buy the idea of holding them down somewhere instead of allowing them explore.

We will be fine.

ImaIma1:


I think awareness has to be created about child proofing here. So that the child can play freely and explore in the area we have cordoned for them.

Children are attracted to wires, switches and many electrical items that are dangerous. How many times will we see them go there. And i don't buy the idea of holding them down somewhere instead of allowing them explore.

We will be fine.

C’est finis

cococandy:
“Discipline and fear”


Are talking about married partners or an authoritative father and an wild child? Even kids shouldn’t fear their parents much less a woman fearing a man she willingly married.

Some of una need brain scan sometimes

Lol.
Whatever rocks your boat.

cococandy:


C’est finis

You speak French?