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My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help - Family (3) - Nairaland

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Don’t Kill Your Husband. This Is How To Deal With Him If He Is Cheating On You / My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad / My Husband Is Very Jealous Because I’m Beautiful – 16-year-old Housewife (2) (3) (4)

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Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by kiddapunk: 11:40pm On Aug 15, 2019
miss00000:
We met in school during my pre-degree and dated for 7 years before he proposed to me. Before the proposal, both our parents had been pestering us to get married and start having children.

We started trying 6months prior, and 6 months after proposing I got pregnant. Few months later we did our introduction and got married (registry) march this year.

Ologbo Reuben- Facebook
07052621968- WhatsApp. Chat me up and let's talk about this

About two years ago, he met a lady where he was supplying his goods. According to him, the lady has been doing everything in her power to push his business. Every time I suspect there was more to their friendship, he always assured me there was nothing, that she's just a friend. sometimes he would even travel with her to Abuja to sell his goods which I had to allow since it was helping his business.

8 months into my pregnancy I noticed a drastic change like coming home very late, he hardly eats at home, he barely talks to memos he's always on his phone. I knew something was wrong and every time I talk to him, he always assured me that everything was fine.

After the delivery and naming of my baby I expected things to go back to the way it was, but it became worse. he changes his phone password almost everyday and still hides his phones from me.

One day I cried and begged him to tell me what was going on, after hours of begging, the first question he asked me was "where was it written in the bible that marriage has to be between one man and one woman and not with different women", "why can't a man marry two or more wives if he has the resources to take care of them equally"(the lady is a muslim btw).

He confessed that he has been dating this lady for over two years and has no plan of leaving her, and theres a possibility he's going to marry her. I'm just 26yo with a one month old baby, I didn't sign up for this.

While growing up, my mum has always warned us against polygamy. although he's promised to be there for me and still wants our marriage to continue, but the thought of my husband being with someone else is killing me. I've tried to reason with him several times but I end up hurting even more. I've been praying but still no change. He's been trying to compensate with gifts and money but thats not what I want. he doesn't want me to tell anyone and I feel reporting him to his family will even worsen the case. We've always settled our issues ourselves without involving anyone. I've tried everything I can just to take my mind off it. I need someone to talk to, prolly a friend or a counsellor. I've been crying for days now, I've not been eating well and I have to breastfeed my child. I never knew my life would be this complicated. I don't know why he got married to me if he already had this in mind. I hate my life right now.
Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Alphafeezay(m): 11:40pm On Aug 15, 2019
I am not a promoter of divorce except in life threatening situations.
In this situation, do other things that will make you happy and make up your mind if he will marry that other lady, fine!!

1 Like

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by BENARI: 11:40pm On Aug 15, 2019
Feminists go derail this thread.

Madam, for God's sake, pls mind how you take any advice from Single women. They will never understand your situation.

Rest assured though, his relationship with that lady will hit the rock soonest.

The lady can't reap where she didn't Sow for too long.
Men can be stupid, but he'll soon realise his foolishness.
I'm not asking you do nothing that others may be suggesting o! But rest assured, he'll come begging someday.

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by delishpot: 11:41pm On Aug 15, 2019
Let me give you the typical advice a naija woman in your shoes get.

You prolly are a bad wife.... Change your character, don't argue with him even if you catch in on top 22 women, just quietly e er the kitchen and cook for them. Do t ask him any questions and his guilty Concience would make him create time for you... To squeeze you into his sex charged schedule.
If he still doesn't change, watch war room, fast, pray, climb 7 mountains and run to all the elders in his home town.
If he still doesn't change, just act like you do t notice him. You are a woman after all, you can afford to watch your man treat you like shit and act like you did not notice. Every Nigerian woman is expected to be made of wood. Ignore his ignoring you. If he doesn't touch you sef....... Is sex food? You are a Nigerian woman, sex in marriage is not food. It is only important to the man.
Keep praying, he will come around. If not now when he is young, he will do so after your youth has been spent in isolation, depression and sorrow. Then you go to church and do testimony of how your once list man has returned to you.
You àre a woman after all, you must learn to endure cos marriage to the average Nigerian is 99% enduring shit from your man.

15 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Vixlot: 11:41pm On Aug 15, 2019
Marriage Palaver
Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Nobody: 11:41pm On Aug 15, 2019
Crying won't help you in this case, it will make it worse.
If you can, start ignoring your husband from now and be strong at doing that, no sissy mind.
Don't tell him your mind, actions and whereabouts but still be respectful to avoid beating incase he is a bully. Don't ask him about his movements too, simply start living with him as neighbors do. Do all your jobs as a wife and don't deny him sex if he asks to avoid beating just incase but show lack of interest all through it. Simply disconnect with him emotionally and make it obvious to him.

The journey to the result will be tough but the result will come out good believe me.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by delishpot: 11:42pm On Aug 15, 2019
Let me give you the typical advice a naija woman in your shoes get.

You prolly are a bad wife.... Change your character, cook well, ditch the wrapper and wear hot pants, don't argue or have an opinion, don't argue with him even if you catch in on top 22 women, just quietly e er the kitchen and cook for them. Do t ask him any questions and his guilty Concience would make him create time for you... To squeeze you into his sex charged schedule.
If he still doesn't change, watch war room, fast, pray, climb 7 mountains and run to all the elders in his home town.
If he still doesn't change, just act like you do t notice him. You are a woman after all, you can afford to watch your man treat you like shit and act like you did not notice. Every Nigerian woman is expected to be made of wood. Ignore his ignoring you. If he doesn't touch you sef....... Is sex food? You are a Nigerian woman, sex in marriage is not food. It is only important to the man.
Keep praying, he will come around. If not now when he is young, he will do so after your youth has been spent in isolation, depression and sorrow. Then you go to church and do testimony of how your once list man has returned to you.
You àre a woman after all, you must learn to endure cos marriage to the average Nigerian is 99% enduring shit from your man.

7 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Kilamiti: 11:42pm On Aug 15, 2019
I pity any married woman who doesn't have a side man by the side. These husbands ain't worth poo. Don't deceive yourselves.dont carry this stupid I am married title on your head because you will just die for nothing. A man wants to keep you at home and still cheat, fine!!! Give your self to another man and make your self happy. In fact having one outside would take your attention away from Wat the fool Is doing and he'll be the one to notice he's the one loosing you. A friend of mine did same.she would go out and suck her boyfriends dick and bring that same mouth to kiss her horseband on his lips. Y'all should stay preaching thou shall not cheat yen yen when these men keep embarrassing you outside. IF YOUR MAN NO WAN STAY ONE PLACE, YOU TOO. CHEAT ON HIM!!!!!!!

16 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by penguinpikin: 11:42pm On Aug 15, 2019
Men are funny. They will be looking for their downfall upandan. My neighbour who was doing fine until he was cajoled into chieftains title in his remote village. The title came with a young woman as a second wife. Today, another lady is pregnant for this same man making it 3 women in his life. Life is unbearable
Madam. This is my candid advice. Let the man get you your own business. You will suffer if u don't start doing something for yourself

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by uuzba(m): 11:43pm On Aug 15, 2019
Logobenz3:
if you are pretty,educated and have a job,come to me.
I have money too,educated,handsome,from a good family and smart smiley
You want to marry another man's wife?
Is that not adultery?

1 Like

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Toks2008(m): 11:43pm On Aug 15, 2019
miss00000:
We met in school during my pre-degree and dated for 7 years before he proposed to me. Before the proposal, both our parents had been pestering us to get married and start having children.

We started trying 6months prior, and 6 months after proposing I got pregnant. Few months later we did our introduction and got married (registry) march this year.

About two years ago, he met a lady where he was supplying his goods. According to him, the lady has been doing everything in her power to push his business. Every time I suspect there was more to their friendship, he always assured me there was nothing, that she's just a friend. sometimes he would even travel with her to Abuja to sell his goods which I had to allow since it was helping his business.

8 months into my pregnancy I noticed a drastic change like coming home very late, he hardly eats at home, he barely talks to memos he's always on his phone. I knew something was wrong and every time I talk to him, he always assured me that everything was fine.

After the delivery and naming of my baby I expected things to go back to the way it was, but it became worse. he changes his phone password almost everyday and still hides his phones from me.

One day I cried and begged him to tell me what was going on, after hours of begging, the first question he asked me was "where was it written in the bible that marriage has to be between one man and one woman and not with different women", "why can't a man marry two or more wives if he has the resources to take care of them equally"(the lady is a muslim btw).

He confessed that he has been dating this lady for over two years and has no plan of leaving her, and theres a possibility he's going to marry her. I'm just 26yo with a one month old baby, I didn't sign up for this.

While growing up, my mum has always warned us against polygamy. although he's promised to be there for me and still wants our marriage to continue, but the thought of my husband being with someone else is killing me. I've tried to reason with him several times but I end up hurting even more. I've been praying but still no change. He's been trying to compensate with gifts and money but thats not what I want. he doesn't want me to tell anyone and I feel reporting him to his family will even worsen the case. We've always settled our issues ourselves without involving anyone. I've tried everything I can just to take my mind off it. I need someone to talk to, prolly a friend or a counsellor. I've been crying for days now, I've not been eating well and I have to breastfeed my child. I never knew my life would be this complicated. I don't know why he got married to me if he already had this in mind. I hate my life right now.

https://www.nairaland.com/4065809/10-realistic-steps-lady-should#60630249
Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by uuzba(m): 11:44pm On Aug 15, 2019
penguinpikin:
Men are funny. They will be looking for their downfall upandan. My neighbour who was doing fine until he was cajoled into chieftains title in his remote village. The title came with a young woman as a second wife. Today, another lady is pregnant for this same man making it 3 women in his life. Life is unbearable
Madam. This is my candid advice. Let the man get you your own business. You will suffer if u don't start doing something for yourself
I really pity the OP
You dated the guy for 6years
And in all that time, you didn't see his character?
When OP said when got pregnant BEFORE wedding, I knew something was wrong with both OP and husband
WAIT AND MARRY FIRST, you will not hear.
The man MAN CANNOT CONTROL his sexual urge, that is why he got you pregnant out of wedlock.
Now you've married, you thought it is over?
Shey you are seeing now that it isn't over?
He is trying to justify his uncontrollable sexual desire by quoting Bible.

You guys are so holy, why didn't you marry in church?

Aunty, this is your problem. You lied to yourself. You have to face whatever shit you get until your husband has a change of heart.

Sit down with him and tell him both of you did a bad thing from the start.
Confess, repent and start again

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by friendlyadvice: 11:45pm On Aug 15, 2019
Cheat your own back na

1 Like

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by OdefaGirl(f): 11:45pm On Aug 15, 2019
You hate your life right now....like seriously?
No naw come on!! That's not the way to go. I know love can make you do and undo but sweetheart, your marriage is still young for you to start this emotional suffer. Remember you have a little angel in your arms to take care of, take things easy. He hasn't married her yet and you are already giving up... One thing one can actually tell one's self is that, with or without partner, you can do just fine. If you die of heart attack, he will wed her before 2 years. Easy please, one step at a time. If it is love in the air, enjoy it, if it gets out of hand that you can't bear, then open up to family and take your decision. Don't forget to lift up your voice to God.. Bless you.
Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Nobody: 11:45pm On Aug 15, 2019
miss00000:
We met in school during my pre-degree and dated for 7 years before he proposed to me. Before the proposal, both our parents had been pestering us to get married and start having children.

We started trying 6months prior, and 6 months after proposing I got pregnant. Few months later we did our introduction and got married (registry) march this year.

About two years ago, he met a lady where he was supplying his goods. According to him, the lady has been doing everything in her power to push his business. Every time I suspect there was more to their friendship, he always assured me there was nothing, that she's just a friend. sometimes he would even travel with her to Abuja to sell his goods which I had to allow since it was helping his business.

8 months into my pregnancy I noticed a drastic change like coming home very late, he hardly eats at home, he barely talks to memos he's always on his phone. I knew something was wrong and every time I talk to him, he always assured me that everything was fine.

After the delivery and naming of my baby I expected things to go back to the way it was, but it became worse. he changes his phone password almost everyday and still hides his phones from me.

One day I cried and begged him to tell me what was going on, after hours of begging, the first question he asked me was "where was it written in the bible that marriage has to be between one man and one woman and not with different women", "why can't a man marry two or more wives if he has the resources to take care of them equally"(the lady is a muslim btw).

He confessed that he has been dating this lady for over two years and has no plan of leaving her, and theres a possibility he's going to marry her. I'm just 26yo with a one month old baby, I didn't sign up for this.

While growing up, my mum has always warned us against polygamy. although he's promised to be there for me and still wants our marriage to continue, but the thought of my husband being with someone else is killing me. I've tried to reason with him several times but I end up hurting even more. I've been praying but still no change. He's been trying to compensate with gifts and money but thats not what I want. he doesn't want me to tell anyone and I feel reporting him to his family will even worsen the case. We've always settled our issues ourselves without involving anyone. I've tried everything I can just to take my mind off it. I need someone to talk to, prolly a friend or a counsellor. I've been crying for days now, I've not been eating well and I have to breastfeed my child. I never knew my life would be this complicated. I don't know why he got married to me if he already had this in mind. I hate my life right now.
Is your husband a Muslim? If yes according to Muslim religion he is entitled to four wives if he possess the financial capability.
Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Dreal1247: 11:45pm On Aug 15, 2019
miss00000:
We met in school during my pre-degree and dated for 7 years before he proposed to me. Before the proposal, both our parents had been pestering us to get married and start having children.

We started trying 6months prior, and 6 months after proposing I got pregnant. Few months later we did our introduction and got married (registry) march this year.

About two years ago, he met a lady where he was supplying his goods. According to him, the lady has been doing everything in her power to push his business. Every time I suspect there was more to their friendship, he always assured me there was nothing, that she's just a friend. sometimes he would even travel with her to Abuja to sell his goods which I had to allow since it was helping his business.

8 months into my pregnancy I noticed a drastic change like coming home very late, he hardly eats at home, he barely talks to memos he's always on his phone. I knew something was wrong and every time I talk to him, he always assured me that everything was fine.

After the delivery and naming of my baby I expected things to go back to the way it was, but it became worse. he changes his phone password almost everyday and still hides his phones from me.

One day I cried and begged him to tell me what was going on, after hours of begging, the first question he asked me was "where was it written in the bible that marriage has to be between one man and one woman and not with different women", "why can't a man marry two or more wives if he has the resources to take care of them equally"(the lady is a muslim btw).

He confessed that he has been dating this lady for over two years and has no plan of leaving her, and theres a possibility he's going to marry her. I'm just 26yo with a one month old baby, I didn't sign up for this.

While growing up, my mum has always warned us against polygamy. although he's promised to be there for me and still wants our marriage to continue, but the thought of my husband being with someone else is killing me. I've tried to reason with him several times but I end up hurting even more. I've been praying but still no change. He's been trying to compensate with gifts and money but thats not what I want. he doesn't want me to tell anyone and I feel reporting him to his family will even worsen the case. We've always settled our issues ourselves without involving anyone. I've tried everything I can just to take my mind off it. I need someone to talk to, prolly a friend or a counsellor. I've been crying for days now, I've not been eating well and I have to breastfeed my child. I never knew my life would be this complicated. I don't know why he got married to me if he already had this in mind. I hate my life right now.

Send message to my email. Possibly your WhatsApp number. Have some questions to ask. All hope is not lost.
Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Unrated900(m): 11:47pm On Aug 15, 2019
Don’t hate your self,a woman can never decide for a man on what he is going to do.

Your husband as made up his mind already and nothing can be done about that.


My sister let’s be honest here.how has been your sexual life before and after you got married.


You never indicated if your sexual life is weak or not,don’t be shy at all.the bible says if the foundation of a man is destroyed,what can the riteous do.

The word a man doesn’t mean man alone but man and woman.


Put up your-self together


Try and be saving money hence forth,try as much as you can to save more money even if you have to lie and collect money from him.


Get a land on your own and in your name.

Start putting something on it

Don’t let it be too big

2 bedroom bungalow is okay


Because as time goes on,go and write it done today he will still chase you off.

Do your thing alone and act as if you don’t care about him and do not report him to his parent because it’s gonna worsen the whole scenario.


GOD WILL SEE YOU THROUGH IN THIS TRYING TIME OF YOURS

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by cutediva87(f): 11:47pm On Aug 15, 2019
madam leave that ediot

6 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Xisnin(m): 11:48pm On Aug 15, 2019
Do you have a job?
If no, start planning to get one and also plan your exit.
You cannot force him to leave the other woman.

On the other hand, you can remain a loyal housewife and welcome your rival
with open arms.

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Unrated900(m): 11:49pm On Aug 15, 2019
cutediva87:
madam leave that ediot



Don’t let her leave him

Because the man will finally brings the woman home since the first wife sent her self packing
Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Bizibi(m): 11:49pm On Aug 15, 2019
Kilamiti:
I pity any married woman who doesn't have a side man by the side. These husbands ain't worth poo. Don't deceive yourselves.dont carry this stupid I am married title on your head because you will just die for nothing. A man wants to keep you at home and still cheat, fine!!! Give your self to another man and make your self happy. In fact having one outside would take your attention away from Wat the fool Is doing and he'll be the one to notice he's the one loosing you. A friend of mine did same.she would go out and suck her boyfriends dick and bring that same mouth to kiss her horseband on his lips. Y'all should stay preaching thou shall not cheat yen yen when these men keep embarrassing you outside. IF YOUR MAN NO WAN STAY ONE PLACE, YOU TOO. CHEAT ON HIM!!!!!!!
*sigh* well it is better to be single,if you think all men are the same and the reason is to duck around and then seeing stories of infidelity by both men and women on this forum,well I think it is better staying single even though I am in my mid thirties.
Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by deltateam: 11:49pm On Aug 15, 2019
Oma307:

why are talking like this? did she say her husband is beating her? where will go to? and what is the assurance that another man is going to marry her? or you think take care of a baby is a child play perhaps she didn't say whether she is working or not. although I am not supporting the husband cheating nature

So because of the chikiny money for upkeep, he can behave like an animal? What did he lack that the wife couldn't give him? Now she's going into depression, making her feel inadequate. For wetin nah?
What's more painful than psychological trauma?!

Dafuq outa here.

13 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by BarrElChapo(m): 11:50pm On Aug 15, 2019
Say no to polygamy.. talk to both your parents and his parents. this isn't an internal man and wife issue. talk to people he respects and listens to.. And most importantly talk to God cos he's your best bet to resolving this. Goodluck

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by penguinpikin: 11:51pm On Aug 15, 2019
BabbanBura:


Please are u married?
. Good question. Because some people are good at scripts
Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by BENARI: 11:51pm On Aug 15, 2019
Kilamiti:
I pity any married woman who doesn't have a side man by the side. These husbands ain't worth poo. Don't deceive yourselves.dont carry this stupid I am married title on your head because you will just die for nothing. A man wants to keep you at home and still cheat, fine!!! Give your self to another man and make your self happy. In fact having one outside would take your attention away from Wat the fool Is doing and he'll be the one to notice he's the one loosing you. A friend of mine did same.she would go out and suck her boyfriends dick and bring that same mouth to kiss her horseband on his lips. Y'all should stay preaching thou shall not cheat yen yen when these men keep embarrassing you outside. IF YOUR MAN NO WAN STAY ONE PLACE, YOU TOO. CHEAT ON HIM!!!!!!!

Ignore this advice pls.

When you cheat, you're not just hurting your mate, you're hurting yourself too.

Just because your husband has chosen to be a dog, does not mean you should be one too.

Miss adviser, stop this losers Gospel.

You can do it when get married until you catch aids in the name of getting even.

7 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Liquid2Metal: 11:52pm On Aug 15, 2019
In my honest opinion, I'll advise you report this issue to his parent and yours; perhaps they can talk him out of the idea. You have to be strong to fight for your right now else it will be too late. The other lady am sure is doing her bit to share your man, so don't sit and wish he will change. If your husband is not under a spell, certainly some action from you and both families can make him rescind his decision.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by uuzba(m): 11:52pm On Aug 15, 2019
friendlyadvice:
Cheat your own back na

Ok. Let me kill you..after you can kill me.

Abi?
Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Unrated900(m): 11:54pm On Aug 15, 2019
deltateam:


So because of the chikiny money for upkeep, he can behave like an animal? What did he lack that the wife couldn't give him? Now she's going into depression, making her feel inadequate. For wetin nah?

Dafuq outa here.



Please don’t let us judge

We had the part of the woman

We never knew what has happened

Remember women can cook up story


What if the man went out due to the woman’s sex life

Let her say what really happened so we won’t be biased

They seems to have an happy home earlier on

And she didn’t complain about the man till he meet another woman

So something must have happened more-over she should settled amicably than leaving the house.
Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by rosy1992(f): 11:55pm On Aug 15, 2019
Stories like this saddens me, I guess op might have seen the signs during those seven years, but ignore it because she was blinded by love.

Moral lesson :don't fall in love instead be in love so that once you notice change like this during courtship, you walk out before it's too late.

1 Like

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by deltateam: 11:59pm On Aug 15, 2019
Unrated900:




Please don’t let us judge

We had the part of the woman

We never knew what has happened

Remember women can cook up story


What if the man went out due to the woman’s sex life

Let her say what really happened so we won’t be biased

They seems to have an happy home earlier on

And she didn’t complain about the man till he meet another woman

So something must have happened more-over she should settled amicably than leaving the house.

Whatever happened to for better and for worse oath in marriage? So you think you have the right to cheat citing marital problems as excuse?

Oh thunder where are thou?

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Boldly Cheating On Me, Help by Unrated900(m): 11:59pm On Aug 15, 2019
[quote author=kiddapunk post=81295033][/quote]


Send me an email I do not need your contact address nor want to have any conversations with you privately


Just email me I got one solution which will help you and bring back your marriage though it’s gonna be a bit difficult but trust me you can’t loose that marriage to that woman

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