₦airaland Forum

Why is it that when you lend people money once, you automatically become their go-to person for credit.

I have noticed this among "friends" and colleagues.

Like that is not enough, their payback tends to get worse with time. Seems they pay back promptly the first time to get your trust, subsequent ones would come with defaults.

Why?

you get luck say them dey pay you back the first time ..dont lend what you can't forget

To a lasting friendship...dont borrow,dont lend.

Mutemenot:
you get luck say them dey pay you back the first time ..dont lend what you can't forget

They paid back, I have to give them some credit for that. Some after few days, some right on the agreed day. Then there was one I told to shun it, after he told me his salary and proposed repayment plan.

I don't lend what I can't forget, but if I wanted to be forgetting- it won't be a loan. It will be a dash.

My problem is, why do they keep coming back? Is there a rule that says, lend once and lend forever?

pocohantas:
They paid back, I have to give them some credit for that. Some after few days, some right on the agreed day. Then there was one I told to shun it, after he told me his salary and proposed repayment plan.

I don't lend what I can't forget, but if I wanted to be forgetting- it won't be a loan. It will be a dash.

My problem is, why do they keep coming back? Is there a rule that says, lend once and lend forever?

because they know you will lend them
and because you are not a mean lender
and because they know they may be able to get away with not paying back

ornicus:
because they know you will lend them
and because you are not a mean lender
and because they know they may be able to get away with not paying back

So, I should stop lending?

Or start charging interest?

A colleague took a loan from me to play Bet9ja. Can you imagine?

pocohantas:
They paid back, I have to give them some credit for that. Some after few days, some right on the agreed day. Then there was one I told to shun it, after he told me his salary and proposed repayment plan.

I don't lend what I can't forget, but if I wanted to be forgetting- it won't be a loan. It will be a dash.

My problem is, why do they keep coming back? Is there a rule that says, lend once and lend forever?

The solution is simple. Dash the person whatever you can or tell the person you don't have . I have one I lend some cash last year, we see everyday...all he does is to greet me before I get to his stand

pocohantas:
So, I should stop lending?

Or start charging interest?

A colleague took a loan from me to play Bet9ja. Can you imagine?

be a BITCH na. dey harass them. where my money. small passive aggressive. just know they will probably hate you afterwards - but then again - they borrowed from you.

A colleague took a loan from me to play Bet9ja. Can you imagine?

Your colleague has much bigger problems than your generosity. he is a problem gambler. he is probably borrowing from everyone.

ornicus:
be a BITCH na. dey harass them. where my money. small passive aggressive. just know they will probably hate you afterwards - but then again - they borrowed from you.



Your colleague has much bigger problems than your generosity. he is a problem gambler. he is probably borrowing from everyone.

Hahahahaha. "Owo mi da?" That thing spoils relationships o. Hardly ever ends well.

I think he does. Never taken my time to find out if he borrows from others, I like to mind my business a lot.

banji1:
Not all friends. If you have friends doing that to you all the time, check yourself. It might have a lot to do with your body language and what/ how you present yourself.

I don't do anything. I am a very plain girl: they just assume I have no responsibilities because I am singu, with a boyfriend. So, my boyfriend's money might be enough. Mine is to save and lend people.

pocohantas:
So, I should stop lending?

Or start charging interest?

A colleague took a loan from me to play Bet9ja. Can you imagine?

Getting your colleagues to pay back loans is easy.

If they come for loan ask for a post dated cheque for the repayment. Once the repayment is due, walk into their bank on salary payment day and cash the cheque

@Op, when next time they come to borrow from you, just tell them you don't have ,introduce them to go borrow from microfinance banks or introduce the online credit facilities to them.
Its simple

pocohantas:
They paid back, I have to give them some credit for that. Some after few days, some right on the agreed day. Then there was one I told to shun it, after he told me his salary and proposed repayment plan.

I don't lend what I can't forget, but if I wanted to be forgetting- it won't be a loan. It will be a dash.

My problem is, why do they keep coming back? Is there a rule that says, lend once and lend forever?

My friends hardly have the nerve to ask. But even if dey do I try to give and never remind them neither do I look at them in the eye the same again.

I can't stand the thanks you'll give me or the shame from you of my realization that you are pennyless. It breaks my heart. It makes me really uncomfortable

I try to loan once and stop contacting or reminding you of it too

They return because they believe you once lend them and they returned it. Since they returned it and they didn't default on the repayment plan, they believed they can easily come back to you and you will lend them again. Remember, first impression last longer.
A friend once lend me some amount. I was always texting and calling the guy before the payment date that I appreciate his kind gesture and I have him in mind. The payment date came and i paid him. The guy was surprised that he hasn't seen such kind of putting someone in mind every now and then. Told him, that's just my person. The guy tried the method with one of his bosses and his boss was amazed too.

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Always glad to lend money to my friends. But there's an amount I can't go beyond.

Lastly, I lend what I can afford to loose.

P.S You guys are confusing me.
Borrowing isn't same as lending na.

Topic says lending. Op says borrowing

pocohantas:
Why is it that when you borrow people money once, you automatically become their go-to person for credit.

I have noticed this among "friends" and colleagues.

Like that is not enough, their payback tends to get worse with time. Seems they pay back promptly the first time to get your trust, subsequent ones would come with defaults.

Why?

I have no problem if they continue to pay back as at when due

The ones that act as if they don't know they are owing you are the most wicked of them all

Either they are Family

Or

They have no shame

True.
Money always have a way of revealing a person's character.

U get money to borrow na,as for me,I don't understand dat word BORROW as in I no knw d meaning

donbachi:
To a lasting friendship...dont borrow,dont lend.

You go stingy gan o. How won't you borrow or dash a friend money when he/she needs it.

Not all friends. If you have friends doing that to you all the time, check yourself. It might have a lot to do with your body language and what/ how you present yourself.

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Okay

If only you realize that friendship is pain and enmity, ease of mind, you will understand better.

pocohantas:
So, I should stop lending?

Or start charging interest?

A colleague took a loan from me to play Bet9ja. Can you imagine?

Do you pray for your debtors at all

pocohantas:
So, I should stop lending?

Or start charging interest?

A colleague took a loan from me to play Bet9ja. Can you imagine?

bet9ja, Really??

Madam abeg help us ask the guy for the code, the game must be damn sure... Hmmm I fear fix match things...

Hmm interesting

Hahahahaha he's very lucky. I have lost uncountable relationships as a result of lending money. They never payback!

Mutemenot:
you get luck say them dey pay you back the first time ..dont lend what you can't forget