₦airaland Forum

malele:
when we tell people there is God and miracle happens, they think its a joke

This statement reeks of dark-age absolute ignorance.

Pls bro, no offence, you need serious enlightenment.

LadySarah:
I must say you are one lucky man.Have been doing skin to skin all these yrs and still negative?

You are special

Loud it


He should thank god

Hobbsandshaw:
I can't think of a better place to go Bros, not even my family.The level of stigmatization is still high in this part of the world.

Continue

Kokaine:
thanks.
But I heard that after a test, the person maybe positive but it cannot be known till after some months when they return for another test. This kind of method is permanently inconclusive. Because during the window period, they could get infected even if they weren't initially

HIV test is done with different kits.

The general screening is done with the "determine kit".
If non reactive,a repeat test is advised after 3months to rule out window period.
If reactive,confirmation is done with Unigold kit.
There is also the STAT PAK kit..Usually used as a tie breaker ,in a condition where Determine is reactive and Unigold is non reactive.

HIV is not actually a death sentence.You are not really resistant to to the virus.Your wife is smart and knowledgeable about the virus.She is the reason neither you nor your sons did not contract the disease. As long as she was on the right dose of the ant-rectroviral drugs, all the viral load would hibernate at her spinal cord making it safe for unprotected sexual intercourse .You can live for eternity with her without contracting it.
Marriage is for better for worse. Forget the means u got convinced to marry her. The truth is that she is your wife. Exposing her will escalate a big problem for your family. If I were u, I would forgive her,sit her down n have a deep discussion with her on how to manage the situation. If she has not infected you all this while, that is enough proof she loves you n would never intend to infect u in the future.

Hobbsandshaw:
Even doctors are suprised.We have been doing skin to skin for over 6yrs now.From what I gathered, she discovered her status sometime in 2014.

Taking your drugs regularly can reduce the viral load and not transmit it to another

All what your wife need is a friend on Nairaland to tell her you are about to pick race. If the thing refused to enter you trough dick, she will force it down your throat. In fact you may swallow it like income. Enire loooooo

Sooner or later , she will infect youonce you start to deny her sex as you normallydo.
Goodluck

Hobbsandshaw:
Brother calm down.This issue is not as simple as you are seeing it.This woman is desperate to keep me,if I force anything, she will fight in a dangerous means. And forget,we have two children together already.I need all the wisdom I'll get to handle this situation.I'm not weak at all.

Hobbsandshaw:
I'm still acting nice because she just had our second baby (her second C-SECTION) 3weeks ago

my brother this is what is called GRACE)from above to to perfect the word that says that what you did not know will not know you. In think in this case your innocency preserved you.

Hobbsandshaw:
I need mature advice from nairalanders.

I got married to my wife December,2015. The marriage is now blessed with two boys, the 2nd boy came last month.

The issue now is that I just discovered my wife is HIV positive during this 2nd pregnancy.The woman that I showed so much love tricked me into marrying her knowing fully well that she was HIV positive. I'm not really angry because she is HIV positive,I'm angry because she has been playing me all along.

She was in the Uni in another state while we were dating.Almost to the end of her study in 2014, she called that she was pregnant after I visited.She came to Lagos with PT and scan results to prove her claim.She then pressured me into paying her bride price before the pregnancy become public.We did our traditional marriage and went to the registry.Months after the marriage,my wife said the pregnancy has mysteriously disappeared, blaming it on "village people",but the gentle man in me didn't allow me to read any meaning to the movie.She tricked me into marrying her with the fake pregnancy after discovering she is HIV positive.

She eventually took in(for real this time),she came back from antenatal one afternoon crying, when I enquired what the issue was, she told me that they booked her for C-SECTION,that the doctor said the baby's weight is below 2kg and will almost be impossible for her to have the baby by herself,I was there consoling her not knowing that the doctor opted for C-SECTION because she is HIV positive.She actually told them not to disclose her status to me.The baby was 3.6kg at birth.My son was giving Nevirapine.I did some search and discovered that the drug is an antiretroviral drug,I became worried but I still played it down.

Her lid finally blew when she started antenatal for this my 2nd son in a different hospital, maybe she might have thought to herself that at this point there is nothing I will do any more, she told me that the doctor referred her to a government hospital for HIV confirmatory test.We went and did the test,I don't know the trick she played this time, the result was non reactive for her, me and our son.I went to the hospital and made Alot of noise,we went home and celebrated.Seven months later, she had an accident and was admitted, the doctor not satisfied with result of our confirmatory test,took her sample and send it to one of the best labs in Lagos,all the kits shows she was reactive.Because of the scene I created earlier, the doctor called me and showed me the result.That was when I started playing back to the first pregnancy scam, the rush for the marriage and the Nevirapine that was giving to my first son and I discovered I was being fooled by this woman all along.

This woman has hid her status from me and have been taking drugs under my nose for over five years without me knowing.I and my boy have gone for test twice at seven months interval and we are confirmed negative. I was told at one teaching hospitals I went for the test last month that maybe I'm just lucky or we are "discordant couple"
I have been expecting her to show remorse, and maybe apologize but she is still doing as if nothing happened.

I can't discuss this with my family or even hers, she will be stigmatize.I feel betrayed,I don't know how long I will stay in this marriage, but then I'm concerned about my boys. I'm afraid she might get desperate and try other means to infect me,I don't trust her.
What should I do?

Hmm. While you are thinking of what to do better be secretly taking preventative drugs and giving your kids the preventative drugs because she seems like a crazy person. She can not be trusted.

Beat123:
Brother! She may hv lied I don’t know. But for the fact that she didn’t give you n pretend which obviously it would be from you.

She tried. She’s not wicked after all.

Accept her if you love her n your kids

Help her make it work.

She will adore you forever


Ps: you don’t hv to tell anyone!

Your kids Surely are clean so you hv no worries.

In sickness and in health remember?

"In sickness and in health remember"

Well it doesn't work like that. I was a Catholic for many years before I "decamped". One thing I like about the Catholic Church is the clarity of their doctrine (even if wrong at times).

The Catholic position on this is that any marriage contracted under any kind of deception (especially the type that bothers on sexuality and reproduction) is null and void. In fact in situations like this, they say there was no marriage abinitio. That means even though men (priests) erroneously join you together in the physical, there was no marriage spiritually and before God. God does not recognize it because it's foundation is falsehood and deception.

If the offended party discovers the truth later in life and decides to end the marriage, the Catholic Church will dissolve the union because there was never a marriage in the first place. The Catholic Church does not believe in divorce, can never grant divorce and has never granted divorce. The may grant separation if the couple come to a point where they believe they can't live together again. As long as they were properly married (no deception, no hidden secret capable negatively impacting on the marriage later), the Catholic Church will not grant divorce.

But its a different ball game if there was deception. The church will say there was no marriage in the first place. Thus there is nothing to dissolve. Examples of deceptions capable of leading to what I have discussed above include (but not limited to) hiding a known disease condition capable of impacting negatively on the marriage, children or partner in the future, hiding or changing your genotype in order to marry someone whose genotype does not match yours, hiding the existence of a previous properly contracted marriage, hiding HIV status (if you are position), belonging to a dangerous secret cult or society and not disclosing same to your partner.

Cases are judged on their individual merits. Each situation is adjudicated in a Canon Court (Catholic Church Court) by competent Canon Lawyers and Judges (usually Catholic Priests who have degrees in both Church and secular laws). It often take years to get through this process. And the final approval to end the "marriage" comes ONLY from the Pope (who would have received briefings from the Canon Court). A relation of mine went through this process and it took about 5 years for her to be "extricated" from her former "husband". She is the ONLY person I know who wedded TWICE in the Catholic Church

This issue is very very deep. I no reach out mouth at all

Blogtrovert:
How about that person's health and life? HIV becomes deadly

No it doesn’t. Nonetheless I am sure the doctors must have advised him. So see it’s her arrogance that’s the big issue now. Foolish woman. She better cool down fast!

Hobbsandshaw:
I need mature advice from nairalanders.

I got married to my wife December,2015. The marriage is now blessed with two boys, the 2nd boy came last month.

The issue now is that I just discovered my wife is HIV positive during this 2nd pregnancy.The woman that I showed so much love tricked me into marrying her knowing fully well that she was HIV positive. I'm not really angry because she is HIV positive,I'm angry because she has been playing me all along.

She was in the Uni in another state while we were dating.Almost to the end of her study in 2014, she called that she was pregnant after I visited.She came to Lagos with PT and scan results to prove her claim.She then pressured me into paying her bride price before the pregnancy become public.We did our traditional marriage and went to the registry.Months after the marriage,my wife said the pregnancy has mysteriously disappeared, blaming it on "village people",but the gentle man in me didn't allow me to read any meaning to the movie.She tricked me into marrying her with the fake pregnancy after discovering she is HIV positive.

She eventually took in(for real this time),she came back from antenatal one afternoon crying, when I enquired what the issue was, she told me that they booked her for C-SECTION,that the doctor said the baby's weight is below 2kg and will almost be impossible for her to have the baby by herself,I was there consoling her not knowing that the doctor opted for C-SECTION because she is HIV positive.She actually told them not to disclose her status to me.The baby was 3.6kg at birth.My son was giving Nevirapine.I did some search and discovered that the drug is an antiretroviral drug,I became worried but I still played it down.

Her lid finally blew when she started antenatal for this my 2nd son in a different hospital, maybe she might have thought to herself that at this point there is nothing I will do any more, she told me that the doctor referred her to a government hospital for HIV confirmatory test.We went and did the test,I don't know the trick she played this time, the result was non reactive for her, me and our son.I went to the hospital and made Alot of noise,we went home and celebrated.Seven months later, she had an accident and was admitted, the doctor not satisfied with result of our confirmatory test,took her sample and send it to one of the best labs in Lagos,all the kits shows she was reactive.Because of the scene I created earlier, the doctor called me and showed me the result.That was when I started playing back to the first pregnancy scam, the rush for the marriage and the Nevirapine that was giving to my first son and I discovered I was being fooled by this woman all along.

This woman has hid her status from me and have been taking drugs under my nose for over five years without me knowing.I and my boy have gone for test twice at seven months interval and we are confirmed negative. I was told at one teaching hospitals I went for the test last month that maybe I'm just lucky or we are "discordant couple"
I have been expecting her to show remorse, and maybe apologize but she is still doing as if nothing happened.

I can't discuss this with my family or even hers, she will be stigmatize.I feel betrayed,I don't know how long I will stay in this marriage, but then I'm concerned about my boys. I'm afraid she might get desperate and try other means to infect me,I don't trust her.
What should I do?

Just jejely go to court n seek for divorce on ground of betrayal. Tell her to sign, accept the divorce and go and her secret will die with just the two of you alone else you will let the whole world know. Me personally don't even need advice on this one. Pls God has already saved you till this point, dont tempt him again. Walk away with the only negative in your life now, or you will have many more negative things to worry about in d future.

GrabHisBalls:
Stop saying she pressured you. I don't think women easily pressure men into doing things they don't want. I could even deduce you married her 'cause a child was involved which you had a choice to say 'No' to. Inasmuch as she may have fooled you, you have your own share of the blame. Couples undergo series of test like genotype, blood group, HIV status before marriage. If you'd both done this, you would've known her status prior to the marriage. That would've informed you that she's infected since you're lucky to have been immune to the virus.

Madam share blame I think u need to start taking your medications u are not OK @all

Hobbsandshaw:
I'm still acting nice because she just had our second baby (her second C-SECTION) 3weeks ago

The time to run would be now if you want to...While she is weak and not plotting. Confront her now while you still have the upper hand. If you are going to leave her. I beg you to take the kids with you. Do not leave them behind

Modernist:
How long would this deceit last?

Not in my shoes to decide that!
I always did HIV tests even genotype self before a date got to a kiss!

Hobbsandshaw:
I need mature advice from nairalanders.

I got married to my wife December,2015. The marriage is now blessed with two boys, the 2nd boy came last month.

The issue now is that I just discovered my wife is HIV positive during this 2nd pregnancy.The woman that I showed so much love tricked me into marrying her knowing fully well that she was HIV positive. I'm not really angry because she is HIV positive,I'm angry because she has been playing me all along.

She was in the Uni in another state while we were dating.Almost to the end of her study in 2014, she called that she was pregnant after I visited.She came to Lagos with PT and scan results to prove her claim.She then pressured me into paying her bride price before the pregnancy become public.We did our traditional marriage and went to the registry.Months after the marriage,my wife said the pregnancy has mysteriously disappeared, blaming it on "village people",but the gentle man in me didn't allow me to read any meaning to the movie.She tricked me into marrying her with the fake pregnancy after discovering she is HIV positive.

She eventually took in(for real this time),she came back from antenatal one afternoon crying, when I enquired what the issue was, she told me that they booked her for C-SECTION,that the doctor said the baby's weight is below 2kg and will almost be impossible for her to have the baby by herself,I was there consoling her not knowing that the doctor opted for C-SECTION because she is HIV positive.She actually told them not to disclose her status to me.The baby was 3.6kg at birth.My son was giving Nevirapine.I did some search and discovered that the drug is an antiretroviral drug,I became worried but I still played it down.

Her lid finally blew when she started antenatal for this my 2nd son in a different hospital, maybe she might have thought to herself that at this point there is nothing I will do any more, she told me that the doctor referred her to a government hospital for HIV confirmatory test.We went and did the test,I don't know the trick she played this time, the result was non reactive for her, me and our son.I went to the hospital and made Alot of noise,we went home and celebrated.Seven months later, she had an accident and was admitted, the doctor not satisfied with result of our confirmatory test,took her sample and send it to one of the best labs in Lagos,all the kits shows she was reactive.Because of the scene I created earlier, the doctor called me and showed me the result.That was when I started playing back to the first pregnancy scam, the rush for the marriage and the Nevirapine that was giving to my first son and I discovered I was being fooled by this woman all along.

This woman has hid her status from me and have been taking drugs under my nose for over five years without me knowing.I and my boy have gone for test twice at seven months interval and we are confirmed negative. I was told at one teaching hospitals I went for the test last month that maybe I'm just lucky or we are "discordant couple"
I have been expecting her to show remorse, and maybe apologize but she is still doing as if nothing happened.

I can't discuss this with my family or even hers, she will be stigmatize.I feel betrayed,I don't know how long I will stay in this marriage, but then I'm concerned about my boys. I'm afraid she might get desperate and try other means to infect me,I don't trust her.
What should I do?

Quietly and gently divorce that bitch. my cousin brother had the same experience, he divorce the woman after they went for test and him was negative and the woman was positive. Bitches scamming guys since creation. collect your two kids, at this point you don't have to play a lover man any longer.

This is not a matter of being lucky. You and your son were not infected with the deadly virus because your wife is on ART ( antiretroviral treatment)... Intensive ART significantly reduces the viral load of HIV and as such transmission cannot occur even if one engage in unprotected sex with an HIV positive patient.

Same thing is also applicable to breastfeeding. HIV positive mothers can breastfeed their babies without passing on the virus to their new born so long as they are placed on ART...because the treatment also decreases the amount of HIV virus in breast milk.

GrabHisBalls:
Stop pushing blames. She didn't force you into marriage. This is why I dislike getting pregnant out of wedlock and suddenly getting the man marry you. Most men who marry in such conditions only do so for the child, not for the woman. Davido impregnated 2, didn't marry any and wasn't forced. Even the Chioma he claims to have so much affection for is pregnant just like the other ladies. Question is, would he have married her if not for the pregnancy? Wizkid has his and wasn't forced. At least, not yet. Own up to your mistakes 'cause you could've said 'No' and nothing would have happened.

What happened to having your medical records before marriage? How insensitive were you that your wife was taking a particular drug for 5 good years under your nose and you had no idea? Just thank God you and your son's are immune to the virus.

Please stop being inhumane, I know if it were to be there other way round you would have called for the guys head, now it's the woman's fault you are trying to turn the table against him. Let's call a spade a spade.

Beat123:
listen! She has hiv and in 5 years you didn’t have it as her husband?

Abeg!
She isn’t wicked after all...

. You avoided my question. Answer it.

[quote author=LordofNaija post=82610992]Wale Adenuga Productions!
We are nothing but a pencil in the hand of the Creator[/quote
This is superstoryyyyyyy......

If you love her continue living with her. Though it is very hard not to trust one's spouse. Discuss with her if you still want to live with her.

Whatever u decide. Pls u need to confide in somebody so that they will know who to suspect if eventually something happens to you. What i mean is that your wife can kill o. All these schemes are that of a psycho.

Hobbsandshaw:
I need mature advice from nairalanders.

I got married to my wife December,2015. The marriage is now blessed with two boys, the 2nd boy came last month.

The issue now is that I just discovered my wife is HIV positive during this 2nd pregnancy.The woman that I showed so much love tricked me into marrying her knowing fully well that she was HIV positive. I'm not really angry because she is HIV positive,I'm angry because she has been playing me all along.

She was in the Uni in another state while we were dating.Almost to the end of her study in 2014, she called that she was pregnant after I visited.She came to Lagos with PT and scan results to prove her claim.She then pressured me into paying her bride price before the pregnancy become public.We did our traditional marriage and went to the registry.Months after the marriage,my wife said the pregnancy has mysteriously disappeared, blaming it on "village people",but the gentle man in me didn't allow me to read any meaning to the movie.She tricked me into marrying her with the fake pregnancy after discovering she is HIV positive.

She eventually took in(for real this time),she came back from antenatal one afternoon crying, when I enquired what the issue was, she told me that they booked her for C-SECTION,that the doctor said the baby's weight is below 2kg and will almost be impossible for her to have the baby by herself,I was there consoling her not knowing that the doctor opted for C-SECTION because she is HIV positive.She actually told them not to disclose her status to me.The baby was 3.6kg at birth.My son was giving Nevirapine.I did some search and discovered that the drug is an antiretroviral drug,I became worried but I still played it down.

Her lid finally blew when she started antenatal for this my 2nd son in a different hospital, maybe she might have thought to herself that at this point there is nothing I will do any more, she told me that the doctor referred her to a government hospital for HIV confirmatory test.We went and did the test,I don't know the trick she played this time, the result was non reactive for her, me and our son.I went to the hospital and made Alot of noise,we went home and celebrated.Seven months later, she had an accident and was admitted, the doctor not satisfied with result of our confirmatory test,took her sample and send it to one of the best labs in Lagos,all the kits shows she was reactive.Because of the scene I created earlier, the doctor called me and showed me the result.That was when I started playing back to the first pregnancy scam, the rush for the marriage and the Nevirapine that was giving to my first son and I discovered I was being fooled by this woman all along.

This woman has hid her status from me and have been taking drugs under my nose for over five years without me knowing.I and my boy have gone for test twice at seven months interval and we are confirmed negative. I was told at one teaching hospitals I went for the test last month that maybe I'm just lucky or we are "discordant couple"
I have been expecting her to show remorse, and maybe apologize but she is still doing as if nothing happened.

I can't discuss this with my family or even hers, she will be stigmatize.I feel betrayed,I don't know how long I will stay in this marriage, but then I'm concerned about my boys. I'm afraid she might get desperate and try other means to infect me,I don't trust her.
What should I do?

Tricky but your wife is wicked and can kill. Iam sorry what if u had contacted it? She would have claimed she got it from you

You are nice ..if its me I will inform her family maybe not mine but her family must know because u don't know tomorrow

I advise you inform two very matured trusted family members of yours she seems not sorry because she has achieved .she got married and has kids so even if u divorce her it won't matter to her

If u can't love with her seek for divorce and take your kids if she argues expose her ...also make her sign agreement she will never challenge you for full custody this is what will make her go mad

Am sorry but your wife s very evil and can kill

MAY GOD PROTECT MEN FROM YOUR TYPE OF WIFEC

"HMMMM"

THIS ONE DIKWA VERY RISKY

lincs25:
Quietly and gently divorce that bitch. my cousin brother had the same experience, he divorce the woman after they went for test and him was negative and the woman was positive. Bitches scamming guys since creation. collect your two kids, at this point you don't have to play a lover man any longer.

No no no his wife is evil ..I just cant fathom this kind of devilish evilness

You are ranting like a guilty person.

There is nofin in being hiv positive young man . Most of the people commenting here are and they don't even know . Young man so far she is taking her drugs is fine and you wont be infected . As it stands now she might even be more healthier than u.love your wife and be a good dad . It could be any of us . Is not all about sex okay. As far as am concern this is not an issue

LadySarah:
I must say you are one lucky man.Have been doing skin to skin all these yrs and still negative?

You are special

Modified:Science or not,taking drugs religously and having low viral load,i still maintain he is special. .If you so believe yourselves,go and experiment with a carrier .

The mentions haff do

is not about been lucky,she takes her drugs religiously.if I were you I will simple live the marriage,because someone that can trick you for yrs is capable of anything. She could look for a way to infect,your sons and you.

crackhouse:
they are not immune to the virus. The drug his wife is taking is what made her viral load to drop significantly and became undetected that she can't pass the virus to another person.

Exactly, so far the wife has been taking her drugs, a point will reach when the viral load will drop significantly and she will not be able to infect anyone . It can even be negative at times when her blood gets tested in th lab but that does not mean that the virus is dead . It is still living in her but at inactive stage. To the OP, I must say that this is a trying time in ur marriage. Pls do not make hasty decision. Hand it to God in prayer for direction on what to do. That u are negative does not mean that u did not sleep with other ladies without protection while in school. Its just by Gods grace that one is negative after all these hassels. If u are a catholic or even if u are not a catholic, I advice u to approach a catholic priest. He will counsel u on the way forward. Though what ur wife did calls for divorce becos she hid her status. Catholic church cannot make that kind of mistake becos u have to go to their own hospital for test before u are wedded in the church. In this way, u cannot bribe anyone most especially if the lab attendants are Rev. Sisters or Rev. Fathers. So sorry about ur predicament but that is not end of the world. I pray that God will give u the grace to go thru this and I believe u will come out a stronger person. Pls go closer to God more at this time becos He alone can solve this problem and wipe ur tears. Trust me u can become negative for life. Pls do not think of divorce now as ur wife might want to do something terrible. I am sure it is becos of the stigmatization and fear of losing u that she hid it from u. I am not holding brief for her though. All the best.