₦airaland Forum

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Dear Try to move on and it’s just a matter of time you will meet a better man. The guy has see you finish

Chai!

Tough one.

SweetKay3:
Please pardon my grammar and long epistle.
Myself and my ex have been together for a couple of years, we studied in same school and department but he was a year ahead of me. We basically did everything together and was known by all as a couple. He graduated while i was in my finals and went for service, he always travelled several hours to come see me and this continued till i graduated last year. Towards the end of 2018 he started worrying about life after NYSC and i always encouraged him of better days ahead.
Fast forward to 2019, i started noticing a reduction in his care and show of love and i told him about it...he apologized and told me to bear with cos he has a lot in mind, I tried as much as i can not to add to his issues, i called often even when he wasn't cos of cash, cheered him up and made him laugh. He passed out of NYSC in March and started job hunting full time, job wasn't coming forth coming within a month...he became seriously unhappy, lost appetite/weight. He got a job in May though not his dream job but it was ok, i expected things to flow better between us cos his worry has reduced but it didn't... we started having issues at different points, on one of the occasions after some arguments i told him i needed a break but because of the bond between us it didn't last up to a week and i begged to continue, he told me he's at a point in his life where he doesn't need pressure so waiting is my choice cos he's not financially ready for marriage and i agreed to stick with him. To cut the long story short i asked one day while chatting if he's totally free with me, he said no cos he's parents are saying he shouldn't marry from my tribe...i asked if he has confronted them, he said no. I got angry, told him if i was in his shoes i would have long told my parents my stand, he told me can mandate them to agree but my family loves him like a son and he's parents might not do same to me so he's scared for me. He broke up with me after several arguments, i pleaded with him severally but he refused to reconsider. We were still talking and chatting after the break up, if i decide not to come online, he'll call the following morning to ask what happened. I've tried all i can to move on but it's just not working cos we are besties, we
still chat everyday and talk...despite the break up i still send him cash when he's in need and he has helped me to work on a program am currently running. I want to know if there's a possibility of us ever coming back together cos my family isn't aware of the breakup yet, my mom still see him as a son in law and they still talk on phone...though he said he has never stopped loving me, he still says i should give someone else a chance.
*note that we are currently separated by distance since last year, though he came to see me in April before the break up.
Can things ever work out between us?

Please dear, for your sanity, Move on completely. Once a guy can't convince his parents about his choice, then I don't see how much he'd be able to protect you against their words should you get married. You will be on ur own.

Move on sis
You guys can just continue being friends, work on your projects and life

Men are dogs.

you were dating a boy,upgrade!!!

When playing maturity turn to confusion, he hurt you and supposed to be remorse of it why is he still disturbing you and you think he can reconcile with you again, let your mind be far away from him....Except the sweetness of manhood is still fresh in your brain.

My dear you have to move on o, your ex is no longer interested in the relationship.
Proof:
1. After the break, it’s was you not him that initiated the reconciliation.
2. After how many years, all of a sudden your tribe is an issue - a popular break up excuse
3. He suggested you see other people.
4. He has told you waiting for him is your choice not his.

He has tried in so many ways to tell you the relationship is over and you should move on but love no go allow you see am. It can be painful but you need to move on, time heals most heartbreaks. Break all ties and date other people. The more you stay and linger, the harder it will be for you.

SweetKay3:
Please pardon my grammar and long epistle.
Myself and my ex have been together for a couple of years, we studied in same school and department but he was a year ahead of me. We basically did everything together and was known by all as a couple. He graduated while i was in my finals and went for service, he always travelled several hours to come see me and this continued till i graduated last year. Towards the end of 2018 he started worrying about life after NYSC and i always encouraged him of better days ahead.
Fast forward to 2019, i started noticing a reduction in his care and show of love and i told him about it...he apologized and told me to bear with cos he has a lot in mind, I tried as much as i can not to add to his issues, i called often even when he wasn't cos of cash, cheered him up and made him laugh. He passed out of NYSC in March and started job hunting full time, job wasn't coming forth coming within a month...he became seriously unhappy, lost appetite/weight. He got a job in May though not his dream job but it was ok, i expected things to flow better between us cos his worry has reduced but it didn't... we started having issues at different points, on one of the occasions after some arguments i told him i needed a break but because of the bond between us it didn't last up to a week and i begged to continue, he told me he's at a point in his life where he doesn't need pressure so waiting is my choice cos he's not financially ready for marriage and i agreed to stick with him. To cut the long story short i asked one day while chatting if he's totally free with me, he said no cos he's parents are saying he shouldn't marry from my tribe...i asked if he has confronted them, he said no. I got angry, told him if i was in his shoes i would have long told my parents my stand, he told me can mandate them to agree but my family loves him like a son and he's parents might not do same to me so he's scared for me. He broke up with me after several arguments, i pleaded with him severally but he refused to reconsider. We were still talking and chatting after the break up, if i decide not to come online, he'll call the following morning to ask what happened. I've tried all i can to move on but it's just not working cos we are besties, we
still chat everyday and talk...despite the break up i still send him cash when he's in need and he has helped me to work on a program am currently running. I want to know if there's a possibility of us ever coming back together cos my family isn't aware of the breakup yet, my mom still see him as a son in law and they still talk on phone...though he said he has never stopped loving me, he still says i should give someone else a chance.
*note that we are currently separated by distance since last year, though he came to see me in April before the break up.
Can things ever work out between us?

The truth is that the guy dropped you long ago, you were too blind to see and face the truth.

Cut off from the relationship and face your projects.

You will certainly meet better, stronger, more financially, emotionally, educationally responsible man soon.

I bet you that guy already introduced another girl he wants to marry to his family... so why put your head there?

I'm advising for your good.....

Leave him alone and pay less attention to him.

SweetKay3:
Please pardon my grammar and long epistle.
Myself and my ex have been together for a couple of years, we studied in same school and department but he was a year ahead of me. We basically did everything together and was known by all as a couple. He graduated while i was in my finals and went for service, he always travelled several hours to come see me and this continued till i graduated last year. Towards the end of 2018 he started worrying about life after NYSC and i always encouraged him of better days ahead.
Fast forward to 2019, i started noticing a reduction in his care and show of love and i told him about it...he apologized and told me to bear with cos he has a lot in mind, I tried as much as i can not to add to his issues, i called often even when he wasn't cos of cash, cheered him up and made him laugh. He passed out of NYSC in March and started job hunting full time, job wasn't coming forth coming within a month...he became seriously unhappy, lost appetite/weight. He got a job in May though not his dream job but it was ok, i expected things to flow better between us cos his worry has reduced but it didn't... we started having issues at different points, on one of the occasions after some arguments i told him i needed a break but because of the bond between us it didn't last up to a week and i begged to continue, he told me he's at a point in his life where he doesn't need pressure so waiting is my choice cos he's not financially ready for marriage and i agreed to stick with him. To cut the long story short i asked one day while chatting if he's totally free with me, he said no cos he's parents are saying he shouldn't marry from my tribe...i asked if he has confronted them, he said no. I got angry, told him if i was in his shoes i would have long told my parents my stand, he told me can mandate them to agree but my family loves him like a son and he's parents might not do same to me so he's scared for me. He broke up with me after several arguments, i pleaded with him severally but he refused to reconsider. We were still talking and chatting after the break up, if i decide not to come online, he'll call the following morning to ask what happened. I've tried all i can to move on but it's just not working cos we are besties, we
still chat everyday and talk...despite the break up i still send him cash when he's in need and he has helped me to work on a program am currently running. I want to know if there's a possibility of us ever coming back together cos my family isn't aware of the breakup yet, my mom still see him as a son in law and they still talk on phone...though he said he has never stopped loving me, he still says i should give someone else a chance.
*note that we are currently separated by distance since last year, though he came to see me in April before the break up.
Can things ever work out between us?

That's what you need todo.

cut all communications with him. Block him. Move on and have a nice life.

He's done with you simple. He has thought about his life on numerous occasions and he couldn't see you fitting into his big picture. Take his advice and give someone else a chance.

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SweetKay3:
That's what surprises me, how he was able throw what we shared into the ocean. I cooked and baked for him, supported him both financially and in all aspects.

Men are very unpredictable. To one of my colleagues it was just complexion issues. He just broke up I told him this is immature. On your own case local man probably wants some things out of life as a married man and do not think you can fit in. He is being immature by not communicating these feelings. Best u can do is to connect to someone else.


Don't be hard on urself pls. U sound like a lovely person that truly cares. He is being selfish by letting some superficial things come before what u both shared.

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SweetKay3:
Thanks, i will have to let him go at this point but am definitely not entering another relationship just yet. I need to channel my energy into making more money. He just missed an independent lady.

Oh my God. OK very great. I don't know if private messaging work here but I'll want to make a connection depending on what works for u.

Aunty move on..It’s always hard, very hard but eventually we all move on. You’re finding it hard to move on because you’re still keeping in contact. Cut all contacts from him.

MedicH:
Oh my God. OK very great. I don't know if private messaging work here but I'll want to make a connection depending on what works for u.

Send an email.

I'm I the only one who only read the first line?

MissGhosted:
Men are dogs.

Wow, so you mean your dad is a dog? That must be touching for a dog to be training you through school with hope you will have some sense. No offense darling

Dibblez:
I'm I the only one who only read the first line?

Lazy youth. How do you read all the plenty notes they dictate for you in school? Abi you no go school?