₦airaland Forum

My dear, Ask yourself dis question.would u have rest of mind when u marry him? your answer would determine ur decision

I dont understand you , even if you are almost 40, Don't, Don't marry him by all means

The reason online advice is dangerous is that only one party tells the story.

I bet most of the things he accused you of are true

okirewaju:
If I were you, I'll take off the current footwear I'm putting on and flee


A man that has verbal diarrhea is a turn off plus a woman beater and still insecure


They will keep edging you until you fall into that pit. There is a difference between Wedding Ceremony and the Marriage itself.

You deserve so much better. Don't settle for less

This is all you need to hear at the moment. Anything else, you are doomed for a miserable marriage!

I just want to say, if you don't need divorce at the end, leave that man. If at all you will be alive to divorce.

What do You call love? Is it because of money he gives you?

dannyla:
I opened a new account to remain anonymous.
This story is a bit long but pls bear with me.

I met this man almost 2yrs ago at an event a friend invited me to. The next week, he collected my number from my friend and called me, we began talking from there and agreed to go on a date. He proposed marriage to me on the first date which I rejected. I told him that I can't marry outside my church and from the little I've heard from him, our life dreams differ. I decided to cut him off from that day and I stayed away for about 3months. Meanwhile he got my friend to introduce him to my sis, mum and another friend who happened to be from his place, I'll call her Grace.
He made them all aware of his intent towards me and my stand and asked for their help to change my mind. Grace became his biggest ally and convinced me to have another date. He asked that we date for a while and see if we can work out our differences. During the date I noticed he has a very hot and quick temper and he listens to gossip a lot so I do tell Gracethat I don't see a future with him but he was too persistent, Grace always had words of encouragement and considering the fact that for some strange reason, it was mainly married men always approach me for a relationship with stories of how they got married to a wrong woman and they are or are almost divorced, dating a single man with no kids was very tempting and I decided to give it a try.

He asked me to tell him everything about me so there are no secrets between us and I did. Starting from secondary school to that day, I told him everything, from my first kiss, the colleague who tried to rape me, my ex who lied about his marital status and disvirgined me etc. he did the same too and I felt a burden roll off my shoulder.

Few days later I began to notice changes in him especially towards my business. I thrive in a male dominated industry in a ratio of 9men to 1woman. He asked me to show him the pictures of my colleagues which I did, he also asked if they make passes at me which I said is almost inevitable but my boundaries are clear and rigid.

Fast forward to now. I noticed that whenever I drop my phone, he goes through it. Facebook, sms, WhatsApp etc. He even picks my call when I'm not close to the phone. He asked me about a certain colleague who cracks dirty jokes like how I rushed to get married (I told him I'm already married). I didn't think much about it.

He later began to complain about my partners and how I'm sleeping with them like the prostitute I am, called me an unrepentant liar, unsubmisive, manipulating etc. Said he regrets asking for my hand at all and he's just waiting forthe day he'll catch me redhanded so he can dump my sorry a*s.
I told him to end it now cus I'm fed up, family came in and I later found out that Grace has been telling a lot of lies against hoping to get him for herself as well as hate filled advises from some aggrieved friends who felt ladies from my tribe are no good and just there to "chop money". Apologies were said and received and we continued.

Another time I visited him and we had an argument, he gave me several heavy knocks on my head and I developed a headache and began to insult him which resultedin more heavy knocks. I broke up with him and left. Later my mum called him to ask why he laid his hands on me, he denied it swearing with his life. Said I insulted him and he lost his temper and insulted me back that he's sorry. He began to drop messages everywhere and I eventually gave in.

3rd incident happened on our way back from an event. He saw a message from a colleague he told me to stop doing business with cus he feels the man has his eyes on me which is totally not true. He flared up, stopped the car and was even threatening to beat me up. I came down from his car and stood by the roadside. He came down too and gave me the insult of my life in full public view and glare and told me to enter the car which I refused. I had no money on me and had to beg a stranger for money. By that time he was coming back, he quickly took a picture of both of us and sent it to everybody of how he caught me in the act with my lover on the road. He called me and said that if he must marry me, I must break my business sim card and look for a wife friendly occupation or sit at home.

He later apologised over it. Meanwhile he and my sis don't flow as before as he once called her a prostitute.

I want to call it quits but everyone around me feels it's a mistake and he is saying everything out of anger and if I'm patient enough, he will change completely.

I must admit that he has changed alot since we met but the progress compared to the timeframe and the heat I face everyday is nothing to write home about.

He loves me to a fault and I don't know if I can find someone who loves me like him but his other attitude is sniffing life out of me. Do I stay or quit?
Thanks for reading and pardon any typos

Mumu marry him na, people ask stupid questions.

dannyla:
I opened a new account to remain anonymous.
This story is a bit long but pls bear with me.

I met this man almost 2yrs ago at an event a friend invited me to. The next week, he collected my number from my friend and called me, we began talking from there and agreed to go on a date. He proposed marriage to me on the first date which I rejected. I told him that I can't marry outside my church and from the little I've heard from him, our life dreams differ. I decided to cut him off from that day and I stayed away for about 3months. Meanwhile he got my friend to introduce him to my sis, mum and another friend who happened to be from his place, I'll call her Grace.
He made them all aware of his intent towards me and my stand and asked for their help to change my mind. Grace became his biggest ally and convinced me to have another date. He asked that we date for a while and see if we can work out our differences. During the date I noticed he has a very hot and quick temper and he listens to gossip a lot so I do tell Gracethat I don't see a future with him but he was too persistent, Grace always had words of encouragement and considering the fact that for some strange reason, it was mainly married men always approach me for a relationship with stories of how they got married to a wrong woman and they are or are almost divorced, dating a single man with no kids was very tempting and I decided to give it a try.

He asked me to tell him everything about me so there are no secrets between us and I did. Starting from secondary school to that day, I told him everything, from my first kiss, the colleague who tried to rape me, my ex who lied about his marital status and disvirgined me etc. he did the same too and I felt a burden roll off my shoulder.

Few days later I began to notice changes in him especially towards my business. I thrive in a male dominated industry in a ratio of 9men to 1woman. He asked me to show him the pictures of my colleagues which I did, he also asked if they make passes at me which I said is almost inevitable but my boundaries are clear and rigid.

Fast forward to now. I noticed that whenever I drop my phone, he goes through it. Facebook, sms, WhatsApp etc. He even picks my call when I'm not close to the phone. He asked me about a certain colleague who cracks dirty jokes like how I rushed to get married (I told him I'm already married). I didn't think much about it.

He later began to complain about my partners and how I'm sleeping with them like the prostitute I am, called me an unrepentant liar, unsubmisive, manipulating etc. Said he regrets asking for my hand at all and he's just waiting forthe day he'll catch me redhanded so he can dump my sorry a*s.
I told him to end it now cus I'm fed up, family came in and I later found out that Grace has been telling a lot of lies against hoping to get him for herself as well as hate filled advises from some aggrieved friends who felt ladies from my tribe are no good and just there to "chop money". Apologies were said and received and we continued.

Another time I visited him and we had an argument, he gave me several heavy knocks on my head and I developed a headache and began to insult him which resultedin more heavy knocks. I broke up with him and left. Later my mum called him to ask why he laid his hands on me, he denied it swearing with his life. Said I insulted him and he lost his temper and insulted me back that he's sorry. He began to drop messages everywhere and I eventually gave in.

3rd incident happened on our way back from an event. He saw a message from a colleague he told me to stop doing business with cus he feels the man has his eyes on me which is totally not true. He flared up, stopped the car and was even threatening to beat me up. I came down from his car and stood by the roadside. He came down too and gave me the insult of my life in full public view and glare and told me to enter the car which I refused. I had no money on me and had to beg a stranger for money. By that time he was coming back, he quickly took a picture of both of us and sent it to everybody of how he caught me in the act with my lover on the road. He called me and said that if he must marry me, I must break my business sim card and look for a wife friendly occupation or sit at home.

He later apologised over it. Meanwhile he and my sis don't flow as before as he once called her a prostitute.

I want to call it quits but everyone around me feels it's a mistake and he is saying everything out of anger and if I'm patient enough, he will change completely.

I must admit that he has changed alot since we met but the progress compared to the timeframe and the heat I face everyday is nothing to write home about.

He loves me to a fault and I don't know if I can find someone who loves me like him but his other attitude is sniffing life out of me. Do I stay or quit?
Thanks for reading and pardon any typos

You're mad. You have very low self-esteem. Why do you allow others to determine what you should do? No boundaries, no sell respect, was your father also a wife beater? Are you a victim of sexual molestation?

I don’t think you need anyone to tell you to move on with your life WITHOUT that man. I don’t understand why you are even still with him. Please RUN to a better life without him

dannyla:
This is scary

You sound like an iddiot

U better used ur tongue to count ur teeth, to avoid story that touches.

My Dear you have NOT found husband oo..
He will kill you very soon with his temper if you continue seeing him.

dannyla:
Hmmmm,
My mom was deflowered by a rapist and all she ever asked of me was to get married as a virgin. Till today, she doesn't know that I was raped too. She once told me she will die a sad woman if I don't keep her request. My father died when I was a girl. My mother sold her clothes to raise us.
If I leave, he'll tell her I'm not a virgin anymore and she will never have that peace she has now. I can't watch my mum suffer for something she didn't do. My mum once used to be hypertensive. What if it comes back due to shock? My aunt used to mock my mom over the rape before our very eyes and my mum simply told her that one wasn't her fault but her children will marry honourably. My mother's pride is the reason I let the rapist walk free. This man knows and will tell everyone.

I'm not yet strong enough to relocate us very far away or foot any drastic bill. That's a major reason I've been tolerating. The advise from those around me doesn't help either. That's why I seek public opinion

You're retardded

dannyla:
I really regret opening up to him. I may never be able to open up to a man again

Is he the Holy Spirit? The only person I can ever fully open up to is the Holy Spirit, because man is flawed. No matter how the love dey shack me, there are boundaries I cannot cross.

faithfull18:
Oh God, I have come to observe that most partners do not like someone who comes clean with them.

They most times use it against you.

A real man is not really interested in your life historical romantic details..he believes everyone has a past. Sefini

You better run now that he has not putted ring and that him yeye prick inside your pussy. He is a divorce/regre waiting to happen. I can shout.

See life I dey here dey die for dominique while op is be beated by a man

dannyla:
This one no hard me

Better still, gift him to Grace. That will be her reward for her insidious ways.

dannyla:
I opened a new account to remain anonymous.
This story is a bit long but pls bear with me.

I met this man almost 2yrs ago at an event a friend invited me to. The next week, he collected my number from my friend and called me, we began talking from there and agreed to go on a date. He proposed marriage to me on the first date which I rejected. I told him that I can't marry outside my church and from the little I've heard from him, our life dreams differ. I decided to cut him off from that day and I stayed away for about 3months. Meanwhile he got my friend to introduce him to my sis, mum and another friend who happened to be from his place, I'll call her Grace.
He made them all aware of his intent towards me and my stand and asked for their help to change my mind. Grace became his biggest ally and convinced me to have another date. He asked that we date for a while and see if we can work out our differences. During the date I noticed he has a very hot and quick temper and he listens to gossip a lot so I do tell Gracethat I don't see a future with him but he was too persistent, Grace always had words of encouragement and considering the fact that for some strange reason, it was mainly married men always approach me for a relationship with stories of how they got married to a wrong woman and they are or are almost divorced, dating a single man with no kids was very tempting and I decided to give it a try.

He asked me to tell him everything about me so there are no secrets between us and I did. Starting from secondary school to that day, I told him everything, from my first kiss, the colleague who tried to rape me, my ex who lied about his marital status and disvirgined me etc. he did the same too and I felt a burden roll off my shoulder.

Few days later I began to notice changes in him especially towards my business. I thrive in a male dominated industry in a ratio of 9men to 1woman. He asked me to show him the pictures of my colleagues which I did, he also asked if they make passes at me which I said is almost inevitable but my boundaries are clear and rigid.

Fast forward to now. I noticed that whenever I drop my phone, he goes through it. Facebook, sms, WhatsApp etc. He even picks my call when I'm not close to the phone. He asked me about a certain colleague who cracks dirty jokes like how I rushed to get married (I told him I'm already married). I didn't think much about it.

He later began to complain about my partners and how I'm sleeping with them like the prostitute I am, called me an unrepentant liar, unsubmisive, manipulating etc. Said he regrets asking for my hand at all and he's just waiting forthe day he'll catch me redhanded so he can dump my sorry a*s.
I told him to end it now cus I'm fed up, family came in and I later found out that Grace has been telling a lot of lies against hoping to get him for herself as well as hate filled advises from some aggrieved friends who felt ladies from my tribe are no good and just there to "chop money". Apologies were said and received and we continued.

Another time I visited him and we had an argument, he gave me several heavy knocks on my head and I developed a headache and began to insult him which resultedin more heavy knocks. I broke up with him and left. Later my mum called him to ask why he laid his hands on me, he denied it swearing with his life. Said I insulted him and he lost his temper and insulted me back that he's sorry. He began to drop messages everywhere and I eventually gave in.

3rd incident happened on our way back from an event. He saw a message from a colleague he told me to stop doing business with cus he feels the man has his eyes on me which is totally not true. He flared up, stopped the car and was even threatening to beat me up. I came down from his car and stood by the roadside. He came down too and gave me the insult of my life in full public view and glare and told me to enter the car which I refused. I had no money on me and had to beg a stranger for money. By that time he was coming back, he quickly took a picture of both of us and sent it to everybody of how he caught me in the act with my lover on the road. He called me and said that if he must marry me, I must break my business sim card and look for a wife friendly occupation or sit at home.

He later apologised over it. Meanwhile he and my sis don't flow as before as he once called her a prostitute.

I want to call it quits but everyone around me feels it's a mistake and he is saying everything out of anger and if I'm patient enough, he will change completely.

I must admit that he has changed alot since we met but the progress compared to the timeframe and the heat I face everyday is nothing to write home about.

He loves me to a fault and I don't know if I can find someone who loves me like him but his other attitude is sniffing life out of me. Do I stay or quit?
Thanks for reading and pardon any typos

My sister run O!

dannyla:
The funny thing is there are women lining up to date him o. So he feels he's doing me a favour / I'm the lucky one

They are lining up because they don't know the kind of toxic individual he is.

dannyla:
I opened a new account to remain anonymous.
This story is a bit long but pls bear with me.

I met this man almost 2yrs ago at an event a friend invited me to. The next week, he collected my number from my friend and called me, we began talking from there and agreed to go on a date. He proposed marriage to me on the first date which I rejected. I told him that I can't marry outside my church and from the little I've heard from him, our life dreams differ. I decided to cut him off from that day and I stayed away for about 3months. Meanwhile he got my friend to introduce him to my sis, mum and another friend who happened to be from his place, I'll call her Grace.
He made them all aware of his intent towards me and my stand and asked for their help to change my mind. Grace became his biggest ally and convinced me to have another date. He asked that we date for a while and see if we can work out our differences. During the date I noticed he has a very hot and quick temper and he listens to gossip a lot so I do tell Gracethat I don't see a future with him but he was too persistent, Grace always had words of encouragement and considering the fact that for some strange reason, it was mainly married men always approach me for a relationship with stories of how they got married to a wrong woman and they are or are almost divorced, dating a single man with no kids was very tempting and I decided to give it a try.

He asked me to tell him everything about me so there are no secrets between us and I did. Starting from secondary school to that day, I told him everything, from my first kiss, the colleague who tried to rape me, my ex who lied about his marital status and disvirgined me etc. he did the same too and I felt a burden roll off my shoulder.

Few days later I began to notice changes in him especially towards my business. I thrive in a male dominated industry in a ratio of 9men to 1woman. He asked me to show him the pictures of my colleagues which I did, he also asked if they make passes at me which I said is almost inevitable but my boundaries are clear and rigid.

Fast forward to now. I noticed that whenever I drop my phone, he goes through it. Facebook, sms, WhatsApp etc. He even picks my call when I'm not close to the phone. He asked me about a certain colleague who cracks dirty jokes like how I rushed to get married (I told him I'm already married). I didn't think much about it.

He later began to complain about my partners and how I'm sleeping with them like the prostitute I am, called me an unrepentant liar, unsubmisive, manipulating etc. Said he regrets asking for my hand at all and he's just waiting forthe day he'll catch me redhanded so he can dump my sorry a*s.
I told him to end it now cus I'm fed up, family came in and I later found out that Grace has been telling a lot of lies against hoping to get him for herself as well as hate filled advises from some aggrieved friends who felt ladies from my tribe are no good and just there to "chop money". Apologies were said and received and we continued.

Another time I visited him and we had an argument, he gave me several heavy knocks on my head and I developed a headache and began to insult him which resultedin more heavy knocks. I broke up with him and left. Later my mum called him to ask why he laid his hands on me, he denied it swearing with his life. Said I insulted him and he lost his temper and insulted me back that he's sorry. He began to drop messages everywhere and I eventually gave in.

3rd incident happened on our way back from an event. He saw a message from a colleague he told me to stop doing business with cus he feels the man has his eyes on me which is totally not true. He flared up, stopped the car and was even threatening to beat me up. I came down from his car and stood by the roadside. He came down too and gave me the insult of my life in full public view and glare and told me to enter the car which I refused. I had no money on me and had to beg a stranger for money. By that time he was coming back, he quickly took a picture of both of us and sent it to everybody of how he caught me in the act with my lover on the road. He called me and said that if he must marry me, I must break my business sim card and look for a wife friendly occupation or sit at home.

He later apologised over it. Meanwhile he and my sis don't flow as before as he once called her a prostitute.

I want to call it quits but everyone around me feels it's a mistake and he is saying everything out of anger and if I'm patient enough, he will change completely.

I must admit that he has changed alot since we met but the progress compared to the timeframe and the heat I face everyday is nothing to write home about.

He loves me to a fault and I don't know if I can find someone who loves me like him but his other attitude is sniffing life out of me. Do I stay or quit?
Thanks for reading and pardon any typos

He called you a prostitute; he laid hands on you. He called your sister a prostitute. He abused and disgraced you in public and wanted to force you back into his car. You're not yet married to him and all this is happening.

My sister, the man still has trust and self esteem issues. He needs Jesus. He needs to cooperate with God to work on his life.
Anything short of that is a disaster.
You need Jesus too. You've been through a lot emotionally, from what you wrote here.

My dear, forget about the car and house cause from your narrative he’s doing well. Probably this is the main reason people around you keep advising you to be patient. It’s your happiness that’s at stake here. A man who does these things to you prior marriage would never change. Quote me any way. But one thing is certain ,if you decide to proceed, a life of misery, sorrows, pains, and even premature death awaits you. Use your tongue to count your teeth my dear.

A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage.
Run and never look back
You will certainly end in a voilent marriage if you continue
So many women are not alive to tell their stories.
Change never come so easy , Don't be decieved.

mikeywise:
why will a man knock a grown up woman repeatedly on the head? Run for your life now that you can.

How will a man knock a woman sef?

dannyla:
.

Please i beg you in the name of God run away from that man cause he can never change. He's immature, insecured, a control freak and very manipulative. He will continue to humiliate, disrespect and bully you. He's an unrepentant narcissist. Aunty abeg run o and protect your emotions.

Lol. Sister are you short? This one his hand is always reaching your head to knock you! Abeg be wearing very high hill so you will be taller than him, his hand might not reach your head any longer.

What's love to you? Seems you have low self esteem or no love for yourself. You are broken and need good counseling therapy. Go discover yourself and leave this confusion.

This is the type man that radically bath someone with a pale of acid water .after u left him and tell the world ,yes he did it and never regretted for his action. This are wicked souls. run away from his rich, tb joushua can help him cured him from that evil sickness. you can equally run to america or London.

The man really love you but it seems you are his problem, because psychologically when you see a man doing like that it shows he has true passion for you that's why he's getting jealousy all the time. To cut it short, you are double dating you are just here to seek advice from your fellow prosty

dannyla:
He loves me to a fault and I don't know if I can find someone who loves me like him but his other attitude is sniffing life out of me. Do I stay or quit?
Thanks for reading and pardon any typos

But why women no get sense at all?

He loves you to a fault and yet he wants to kill you and yet you don't know what to do?

I don't just want to call you stupid.

Not because I don't really want to.

But just because I don't want some trigger happy mods to ban me.

But all the same... you aint wise at all.

Listen to this...

I have a goat.

I love this goat to a fault.

I will kill the goat for this Christmas.

Think about that.

As a lady, ur weapon is prayer, seek for God opinion, he will see u throu. and secondly start pushing him for morning devotion.

dannyla:
I opened a new account to remain anonymous.
This story is a bit long but pls bear with me.

I met this man almost 2yrs ago at an event a friend invited me to. The next week, he collected my number from my friend and called me, we began talking from there and agreed to go on a date. He proposed marriage to me on the first date which I rejected. I told him that I can't marry outside my church and from the little I've heard from him, our life dreams differ. I decided to cut him off from that day and I stayed away for about 3months. Meanwhile he got my friend to introduce him to my sis, mum and another friend who happened to be from his place, I'll call her Grace.
He made them all aware of his intent towards me and my stand and asked for their help to change my mind. Grace became his biggest ally and convinced me to have another date. He asked that we date for a while and see if we can work out our differences. During the date I noticed he has a very hot and quick temper and he listens to gossip a lot so I do tell Gracethat I don't see a future with him but he was too persistent, Grace always had words of encouragement and considering the fact that for some strange reason, it was mainly married men always approach me for a relationship with stories of how they got married to a wrong woman and they are or are almost divorced, dating a single man with no kids was very tempting and I decided to give it a try.

He asked me to tell him everything about me so there are no secrets between us and I did. Starting from secondary school to that day, I told him everything, from my first kiss, the colleague who tried to rape me, my ex who lied about his marital status and disvirgined me etc. he did the same too and I felt a burden roll off my shoulder.

Few days later I began to notice changes in him especially towards my business. I thrive in a male dominated industry in a ratio of 9men to 1woman. He asked me to show him the pictures of my colleagues which I did, he also asked if they make passes at me which I said is almost inevitable but my boundaries are clear and rigid.

Fast forward to now. I noticed that whenever I drop my phone, he goes through it. Facebook, sms, WhatsApp etc. He even picks my call when I'm not close to the phone. He asked me about a certain colleague who cracks dirty jokes like how I rushed to get married (I told him I'm already married). I didn't think much about it.

He later began to complain about my partners and how I'm sleeping with them like the prostitute I am, called me an unrepentant liar, unsubmisive, manipulating etc. Said he regrets asking for my hand at all and he's just waiting forthe day he'll catch me redhanded so he can dump my sorry a*s.
I told him to end it now cus I'm fed up, family came in and I later found out that Grace has been telling a lot of lies against hoping to get him for herself as well as hate filled advises from some aggrieved friends who felt ladies from my tribe are no good and just there to "chop money". Apologies were said and received and we continued.

Another time I visited him and we had an argument, he gave me several heavy knocks on my head and I developed a headache and began to insult him which resultedin more heavy knocks. I broke up with him and left. Later my mum called him to ask why he laid his hands on me, he denied it swearing with his life. Said I insulted him and he lost his temper and insulted me back that he's sorry. He began to drop messages everywhere and I eventually gave in.

3rd incident happened on our way back from an event. He saw a message from a colleague he told me to stop doing business with cus he feels the man has his eyes on me which is totally not true. He flared up, stopped the car and was even threatening to beat me up. I came down from his car and stood by the roadside. He came down too and gave me the insult of my life in full public view and glare and told me to enter the car which I refused. I had no money on me and had to beg a stranger for money. By that time he was coming back, he quickly took a picture of both of us and sent it to everybody of how he caught me in the act with my lover on the road. He called me and said that if he must marry me, I must break my business sim card and look for a wife friendly occupation or sit at home.

He later apologised over it. Meanwhile he and my sis don't flow as before as he once called her a prostitute.

I want to call it quits but everyone around me feels it's a mistake and he is saying everything out of anger and if I'm patient enough, he will change completely.

I must admit that he has changed alot since we met but the progress compared to the timeframe and the heat I face everyday is nothing to write home about.

He loves me to a fault and I don't know if I can find someone who loves me like him but his other attitude is sniffing life out of me. Do I stay or quit?
Thanks for reading and pardon any typos

Your last paragraph is all shades of wrong, girl, you reek of low self esteem. Look yourself on the mirror and say you deserve the best. When it comes to marriage, people's opinions don't matter because its solely your cross and not theirs.. You are lucky to even see the signs before marriage. That guy does not respect you, soon enough he would beat you, your sister and even your mum. Do you think love is all that is needed in a marriage? Believe you me, its the least. Women marry men, hoping that they change so don't hope that he would get better after marriage, becaus he won't. As a matter of fact, thingss would get worse. So I say, emancipate yourself from this emotional slavery.

IAmStrange:
I have come to notice that most times when human beings fall in love, we lose our willpower. People mistake it for sense - meaning we lose our sense but it's not true in many cases.

The person who is in love can actually have His sense intact and functioning and in every event, he knows the right thing to do... But he just doesn't do it because he has lost his willpower and his resolve has become weak so he runs around seeking advice from people so that their comments can serve as a sort of motivation to carry on with what he already thinks or knows he should do.

Secondly, you were saying he loves you to a fault. I don't want to dispute that. But I want you to know that "love" is not the only thing to be considered when choosing a spouse. You must not - I repeat - you must not marry someone JUST because he loves you. Love is not the only thing that guarantees happiness in a marriage.

There are more important things to be considered.

Do you really think those husbands that send their wives to the hospital after beating them thoroughly do not love their wives? in fact, they sometimes do that due to extreme love and protective jealousy for their wives?

Do you think all those men who womanize and cheat on their wives do not love their wives? In fact, in many cases, they do love their wives and give her all respect and love she deserves and would never allow any man come near her. Yet, they are serious cheats!!!

You are going to live with the character of your man and the character of your man is one of the major factors that will determine if he will make a good husband, father, in law to your people and if he will make a good "head of the family".

So cancel out that idea that "he loves me to a fault" if you think that that's enough for you to give in to him.

It's better for you to marry someone who loves you averagely and he treats you like the "queen" you are than get married to someone who "loves you to a fault" and he treats you like you are "serving a sentence as a prisoner" in his house.

Then thirdly, I want you to know that, that man has serious issues and if I were you, I will flee from entering into a marriage with such a person.

Please open your mind - that guy is going to cage you. He's probably going to make your life miserable.

- He has anger issues.
- He has trust issues
- He is uncultured (calling your sister a prostitute and hurling insults at you)
- He is a wife beater
- he jumps to stupid conclusions hastily (calling you a prostitute and going to the extent of taking your pictures)
- He checks your phone and wrongly accuses you of different things
- His jealousy is overboard

Believe me, A man who has all the above will probably make life miserable for you.

He may be the kind of man that will make you sit at home and cut you off the world. Then he maltreats you and doesn't take care of you, making you age faster and weaker as time goes on. Then he will be giving outsiders the impression that he is taking care of you and when you try to complain, they listen to him and not you.

And when you now start looking miserable, he ends up cheating on you with more beautiful girls out there while he leaves you at home to your misery.

There are men like this out there - that guy may be one.

So I advise you to flee from him. Do not listen to anyone. Don't let anyone pressure you into accepting him. They are not the ones to bear the pain and when you die and they get to know the true story, they will still blame you for accepting him.

That's life!

Then, please, do not also think low of yourself and pressure yourself into accepting him just because single men are not coming or because of your age.

Marrisge is a beAutiful thing but that's only when it's with the right person.

Being happily single is better than being miserably married

If you listen to the stories of many married women out there, you will thank your Lord and consider your single status a blessing, thanking God for saving you from what those married women have experienced.

I don't know your age but I think you are probably "not too old" yet.

Please, think positively of your God, yourself and aim for good.

Leave that man and after you have done that, pray to your Lord to bring you a good man you can settle down with.

And while you are still waiting, please be patient and understand that our major purpose on earth is to serve God. That's the major and true success.

Being single doesn't mean that you are a failure, don't let society pressure you into believing that.

The one who is married doesn't necessarily have more superiority in the eyes of God than the single one. The level of superiority is measured by how much you are close to God, how much of righteousness you achieve on earth and how much you do things that matter to the whole world - things that affect people positively.

Being single may turn out to be a blessing on its own. I know some people who went to very great heights of which it would have been difficult to achieve if they got married. What matters is your happiness, your wellbeing and how much your Creator is pleased with you.

So pray to your Lord and hope for good and be positive that he will send you a good man. But while you are waiting, try to do other meaningful things in your life that will bring you happiness.

Don't settle for a bad man who will make your life miserable.


May God soften your heart and grant you your desires.

dannyla

This is the award-winning comment here. It puts everything in the right perspective. Lady, follow this advice. Marriage is not a license to happiness. Loving God and our neighbour is the major way to be truly happy. Every other thing is secondary. Peace to you.

He's waiting to possess you before turning you his punching bag. You still have the chance to run now. Don't wait till you or the people around you regret pushing you into the pit.

bluefilm:
But why women no get sense at all?

He loves you to a fault and yet he wants to kill you and yet you don't know what to do?

I don't just want to call you stupid.

Not because I don't really want to.

But just because I don't want some trigger happy mods to ban me.

But all the same... you aint wise at all.

Listen to this...

I have a goat.

I love this goat to a fault.

I will kill the goat for this Christmas.

Think about that.

Clown