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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi (2525 Views)
Help! My Wife Is Suddenly Too Violent / Cheating Man Remains With A Violent, Cheating Wife Who Has Another Man's Child / Man Catches His Wife In A Hotel With Man, Says "I Have The Right To Kill You" (2) (3) (4)
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Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by bukatyne(f): 7:04pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
liberalchick: So are we basing physical violence on force now? What if the guy was sick and his lady's hands made him slump and die? Would the court still consider the force? How do we know his life was not in danger? Haven't we seen women kill their men? I agree with you that people should not ideally that laws into their hands. What I am saying in addition is that people should not verbally abuse others with the hope that the abused person would look at them and go to the nearest police station. We are humans with emotions and blood flowing. We are not robots programmed with A, B and C. You constantly call a man with a large family a bastard, he might shake it off. You call a man abandoned in an orphanage/ denied by his father a bastard constantly and he will snap one day. When we are tempted to verbally abuse people, let us put ourselves in the shoes of the other person and do the right thing. Not start the madness in the first place. We are having this discussion because it is believed that women are the more verbally abusive so men should give them a pass, walk away, hit a wall, ignore bla bla bla. Funnily, this doesn't even bode well for women rights movement and the right to be seen as equal as a man. If a woman sees herself as equal, she should be freaking ready to face the consequences of running her mouth. The man might ignore her, pick another lover, walk away (which some stupid women still jack their men till they receive a slap), or slap her back. You cannot control people's reaction to verbal abuse. Let us avoid it altogether or if you are verbally abuse and you receive a slap, take it as the repercussion of your verbal abuse and sort out your issues. 2 Likes |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by crackhaus: 7:05pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
midnighter:I assume you already know I'm not the one who ought to read all of this because it's exactly what I have been all about here. DON'T PROVOKE, it's quite simple really if everyone took their heads out of their arsés. But alas, I'm not holding my breath for this miracle to happen. 2 Likes |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by Nobody: 7:06pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
bukatyne: So your touching school stories fit the context of marriage but you encouraging verbal abuse, as you call it, on the other thread is a quote out of context? According to you it is ok to call random strangers names but it is not ok if they are our family members. I assume it is also ok to beat people up as long as they are not our family. And you call yourself objective. 2 Likes |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by bukatyne(f): 7:10pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
liberalchick: A man verbally abusing me or throwing insults at me one time is one thing. If my husband constantly verbally abuses me, I will deal with him. I might not slap him because I can't finish him off. I know my leverage in every situation; I do not have the physical strength to beat him to a pulp. I will think of something that he will remember for a really really long time. @Bold: is an If because I did not marry a verbally abusive man. I am that lazy and would look for lasting solutions so I can relax and working myself up per time. And this is not a man thing, same applies to a woman. I as a rule rarely do back and forth with random people I would most likely not see again. 1 Like |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by midnighter(f): 7:12pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
crackhaus: Lol..I am still digesting the thread From a logical standpoint it seems one way but the whole "don't ever hit a woman" stuff still comes in because of the proportional effect of man's strength vs a woman's. We assume that the man's own would be worse, because most of the time, it is. So that's another factor. |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by bukatyne(f): 7:17pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
Mindfulness: Mindfulness, Telling ladies (because the thread was about ladies) to check themselves if they are given a label that offends them is encouraging verbal abuse. If you also don't know the difference between a random man/woman calling you 'idiot' because you overtook them in traffic and your spouse calling you idiot everyday for the next two years then I must say this discussion is over and you win. That doesn't stop women who think they can legislate their husband's response to their constant verbal abuse chopping slap this very minute. Hopefully, they will log on to NL thereafter and feel good about themselves or show their husbands this thread. 1 Like |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by crackhaus: 7:20pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
Fountainofyouth:Her thirst for me will never let her keep to her own words. Attention hungry chics turn me all the way off. Girl I just don't like you, and I want nothing to do with you even if my life depended on it. Fountainofyouth:Cry cry baby... Wa wa wa wa wa Pathetic. 2 Likes |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by bukatyne(f): 7:21pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
The women who are really physically abused dare not talk to their husbands or talk back at him. Those are the women I am concerned about who needs help. They are the ones who by intentionally or unintentionally married psychotic men. Any woman who gets slapped because she constantly wears her husband down with his acid tongue; I have only one advise to you. Go and watch your tongue and learn how to communicate more effectively. Stop been an instigator and cry foul when your tired husband retaliates. And men, if you are the ones with acid tongues, same goes to you. 2 Likes |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by liberalchick(f): 7:21pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
bukatyne:“Violence is the use of physical force to Injure, abuse or damage” Bukatyne, you’ve brought a bias into this discussion - “Women are given a pass because they’re physically weaker than men” You are not being open minded. In your sick boyfriend scenario, the women goes to jail. Irrespective of gender if 1. Your life is not threatened, you’ve a way to escape or walk away and you’re not actually in physical harm then you’ve no defense for an assault and battery. If Ronda Rousey slaps a 5’4” man, in a house that he cannot escape then he’s justified in beating her (if he can lol) and she will go to jail for assault. The law believes if you have means to walk away from a situation that causes you physical or emotional distress and your life isn’t in danger, then that should always be your FIRST option. You can not really be serious that people don’t have the will to walk away from situations that they can. Most people that give in to “provocation” very easily do so because they know they can win the physical battle. P.S this also applies to two men or two women. 4 Likes |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by crackhaus: 7:26pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
midnighter:Knowledge of this fact is exactly why women who are devilishly manipulative take advantage of men by being verbally abusive, and then cry foul when they get their teeth kicked in. Nothing worse than a manipulative woman, Belial has nothing on her. 3 Likes |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by bukatyne(f): 7:29pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
liberalchick: I have demonstrated my open-mindedness on this thread. Except when we are dealing with a mad person, people do not usually just start slapping their better halves. That is why wise people would ask 'what happened?' I did not bring a bias, I just mentioned the elephant in the room. Why are people so 'Physical violence is evil?' Like for like, how many women can beat their men? When we talk physical violence, who do we have in mind as a victim? And those who do verbal violence know they can get away with words, It is their forte. If verbal abuse reduces, physical abuse would also reduce. It is mostly a cause and effect thing. It is just like the NL romance guys who whine about the number of virgins or the way girls sleep around. If they and their friends decide to keep themselves chaste, the number of girls having sex would reduce. Imagine that on a wide scale. |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by liberalchick(f): 7:30pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
bukatyne:The first part of the bolded falls under “sustained abuse”. There you go! Humans can walk away! If those that think they can’t win the physical battle can walk away then everyone can, so that’s no longer a justification. You walk away and if what you walked away from is a crime, report it. 7 Likes |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by Nobody: 7:34pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
bukatyne: So ladies must check themselves if they are abused verbally but husbands must not? They should rather be understood if they respond physically? What if calling him an idiot is a statement of fact? We all know there are nuances but you remember them just now. Your argument was that verbal attacks are on par with physical attacks as they are different forms of violence and I agree to some degree but I find it surprising that you remembered it now. For you to say that it is ok to call random strangers names (=abuse them verbally) but not ok to do it in your family is like saying that it is ok to steal as long as you don't do it in your family. It's this kind of mentality that ruins this country. 2 Likes |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by midnighter(f): 7:34pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
crackhaus: Yes, which is why I couldn't understand what they were saying in that thread with the dude who hit his wife. It was like some of them were reading a different post |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by Nobody: 7:39pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
midnighter: Really? Where? I didn't know you can take someone to court for calling you names. All NLanders will spend Christmas in jail if that is so. 1 Like |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by crackhaus: 7:41pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
midnighter:The Dunning-Kruger Effect can do that. |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by midnighter(f): 7:41pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
Mindfulness: Lol no, I meant somebody who snapped and hit somebody who was verbally abusing them would be punished less than a person who just randomly beat somebody up I was just lazy to type haha let me modify |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by Nobody: 7:42pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
midnighter: Ok. |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by bukatyne(f): 7:51pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
crackhaus: There is a movie 'Disturbed'. by Fredrick Leonard and Kiki Omeilli When you watch it the first time, you will think the guy is evil till you get to the end. If it was real, the husband would have gone mad. |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by bukatyne(f): 7:53pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
liberalchick: This thread is about people walking away; people will always do. The thread is about not encouraging verbal abuse in the first place. |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by Fountainofyouth(f): 8:04pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
crackhaus: You went crawling on your stomach to my thread to get my attention lol crackhaus: You were so excited I replied, like feeling on top of the world, you had to sheepishly ask why you called my attention, who loves who now crackhaus: And then you had to apologize for your previous stupidity like you were so sad you couldn't sleep at night for 2 days, you had to wake me up with your mention I know I was in your thoughts boo, and I know I have a way of sliding in like that, I have that effect, but you ain't worth a dot dude, that is how irrelevant you are to me, What a pathetic creature. 2 Likes |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by Fountainofyouth(f): 8:10pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
bukatyne: No one is saying verbal abuse should be overlooked, in that thread, your opinion is that verbal, negative, untrue words and abuse should be overlooked forgetting the fact that some can hurt, and now you're saying verbal abuse breeds physical violence, which in a way is right according to you, my point is, why speaking from both sides of the mouth? 2 Likes |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by bukatyne(f): 8:15pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
Fountainofyouth: So if I call you a b!tch on NL now, you will trace my house and beat me up? If I am a girl next door who sees you once a month and call you a slut, it will be same as when your boyfriend calls you slut every time you have a fracas? And who said Verbal abuse -----> Physical abuse is right? Whatever rocks your boat ma'am. |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by crackhaus: 8:15pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
Fountainofyouth:Not interested 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by crackhaus: 8:23pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
bukatyne:Yea well, regarding your edit to 'people', surely you understand the context here is verbal abuse by an instigator who believes they will be safe from physical abuse...and guess which gender is guilty of this? Yes, women. 2 Likes |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by bukatyne(f): 8:25pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
crackhaus: Hahahahahaha! 1 Like |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by midnighter(f): 8:28pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
Mindfulness: |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by Fountainofyouth(f): 8:32pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
2 Likes |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by Fountainofyouth(f): 8:37pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
bukatyne: Yes if you calling me a bitch hurts me, I'd trace you and beat you up, isn't your point verbal abuse equals physical abuse? Yes it is same cos you both said negative untrue words about me, Did I give you the impression that verbal and physical abuse is right? Lol. 1 Like |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by crackhaus: 8:39pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
bukatyne:Admit it, I'm right |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by bukatyne(f): 8:45pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
crackhaus: You are late to the party I have already stated it earlier. Let me find it Note the bold: bukatyne: |
Re: No Gender Has The Exclusive Right To Be Violent - Solomon Buchi by bukatyne(f): 8:48pm On Dec 18, 2019 |
liberalchick: People can walk away. Do I want to find out if the person I am fingering their mind would walk away? No. I am not that bold. And if someone close to me keeps saying the wrong things after warnings and even looking inwards, they will pay for it (whatever I deem appropriate) . 2 Likes |
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