AwkaetitiBabe:
Guy calm down joh. This one you hammering on such, hope u not a suspect. Na thief dey know thief

Suspect of spotting Crooks yeah

Anyways just can't stand injustice

It grinds my gears that's all

arukwe123:
my question is simple. What if he was not lying. What if he did not intend to rape her. You dont pass judgment by mere assumption. Many innocent people have been killed for this reason. How sure are you?

The biggest issue here is not whether he intended to rape or not. The biggest issue is the fact that he approached and touched a lady he barely knew inappropriately and in a way that might have frightened the lady and led her to believe she was in imminent danger of rape/sexual assault.

It is quite an unusual way to behave. Someone told you twice that they didn't need your help. Shortly afterwards, you walked towards them offering yet again to help, only this time raising your arm to a part of their body. Ofcourse the lady would have been frightened, and think the worst was about to happen. Remember, they were the only two people in the office.

Even if you give the Op the benefit of the doubt about his true intention, he displayed very poor judgement. And if you were his boss, and a lady, I think you'd be asking yourself whether you can be totally safe being alone with him in your office. His employer clearly lost trust in him, and rightly sacked him.

arukwe123:
ok. Just mind what you say online. Have a good day

Yes mummy

bmdmixer:
how is d grammer ur problem. Awon grammer club

If I have learnt one thing, it's that no matter the familiarity with your boss, you have to draw the line between work and play.
Imagine you asking for forgiveness and still having the effrontery to use abbreviation. Who does that?
That means the OP obviously has an inherent attitude problem. He has no regards for his boss and the lady has been looking for a chance to teach him a lesson.

virgoquin:
You can mention me on a dead thread and you can say what the issue is

It's a sensitive one. WhatsApp would be OK

ambassadorgozie:
6th of January 2020 is the day I won’t forget. I work as a personal assistant/secretary to my boss who happens to be a former politician.

My boss came to work with her housemaid for her to help in sweeping, cleaning and tidying up the office being the resumption day. She instructed us on how to go about it before she stepped out from the office promising to come back in the afternoon.

We started the work immediately until afternoon time when I decided to rest and eat. While eating I beckoned the grown up housemaid to come and eat or at least rest before she continues the cleaning but she declined. After like an hour, I told her to rest small, she declined yet again. This prompted me to go close to her in order to convince her to eat something or rest.

My worst mistake and nightmare was attempting to put my hand on her shoulder in my stupid bid to convince her. Immediately my hand touched her shoulder she started shouting continuously that I want to rape her, that she will deal with me; in fact that I will get sacked. At first I told her my intention, but she wouldn’t hear me, I then resorted to pleading, I even knelt down begging her that it wasn’t my intention to rape or grab her. She couldn’t stand my talks and pleading, she called the boss immediately telling her that I want to rape her. We narrated everything to the boss, (a lawyer), when she returned. After hearing from us she said she has stayed with her maid for couple of years, thus she trust her, and it may be true that I wanted to rape her or lure her for sex. She couldn’t see my explanation, pleadings and even crying. She said she has two options; either to call police for me or to sack me. That’s how she later sacked me that day.

I have been devastated and depressed since that day, not because of the sack but the allegation and accusation that was not even on my mind. The worst is that as an introvert I have no one to talk to, I am damn down.

Notes: 1. I have no intention of raping, grabbing or having sex with her
2. I will not be so stupid to rape or have sex with the housemaid in the office knowing that the boss will come at any time
3. I have not raped anyone or plan to do so in the future because I know is morally and legally wrong.

Find a way to see the said maid.

Tell her. “ you have succeeded in sacking me, I do not know your gains in all of these, I do not have a problem in being sacked, but accusing me for something I never did, something as serious as rape, no problem, I am a Christian, but I know that God is merciful, I would have waited for him for judgement but he is slow to anger. However, I will have to leave this case before Amadioha/ogun( depends on where this happened and which you think is powerful in that area) because I need to be vindicated, whatever you see, you take, do have a nice day.

Then you leave, do not say anything to her again.


Now, as you leave, make sure you carry out your treats.

THE CONFESSIONS OF A SLOW UNREPENTANT SEXUAL ABUSER Part 1.

ambassadorgozie:


be serious guy, my mind didn't go dia at all

You told to her come and eat twice, she refused, you still went to her to 'touch' her in order to 'convince' her. Onye oma CY, why didn't you just mind your business after trying failing twice to get her to rest.

I want to believe you Mr nice guy, but I find it hard to.
Next time mind your business, it's cheaper.

VeeVeeMyLuv:
bros abeg u stop that habit now o, if u kontinue like this, one day from tapping the shoulder u go end up tapping the arse of a General's wife in his presence.

Baba me no be touchy touchy oo, I just dey surprise say touching shoulder na sexual harassment.

HarunaWest:

If I have learnt one thing, it's that no matter the familiarity with your boss, you have to draw the line between work and play.
Imagine you asking for forgiveness and still having the effrontery to use abbreviation. Who does that?
That means the OP obviously has an inherent attitude problem. He has no regards for his boss and the lady has been looking for a chance to teach him a lesson.

I agree. It smacks of lack of professionalism. Op to his boss - 'good pm ma'. What does that mean. What's wrong with 'good afternoon'. Quite irritating

Lamanii22:
That lady was sent from the pit of hell... Damn... No evidence, no nothing... Sometimes it's good to be mean sef... Too much kindness isn't good... I'm really sorry you were accused wrongly and sacked all at once.. The lord would provide a better job for you Hun..

I swear. That was how I recently began to talk with a little girl of 19 that came to stay in my uncle's house cos she is always lonely. Only for her to be claiming familiarity and even insulting me on top. I don kukuma maintain my lane. I no kind again

livebyday:


Yes mummy

I'm a guy o.

chigoizie7:



Find a way to see the said maid.

Tell her. “ you have succeeded in sacking me, I do not know your gains in all of these, I do not have a problem in being sacked, but accusing me for something I never did, something as serious as rape, no problem, I am a Christian, but I know that God is merciful, I would have waited for him for judgement but he is slow to anger. However, I will have to leave this case before Amadioha/ogun( depends on where this happened and which you think is powerful in that area) because I need to be vindicated, whatever you see, you take, do have a nice day.

Then you leave, do not say anything to her again.


Now, as you leave, make sure you carry out your treats.

my namesake, i hear u

Anybody who buys this shit is the most stupid creature on earth.
I'm a 25years old guy and you want me to just believe this..
Even if get tumor for brain,na wa ooo.
You told her to eat,she refused
You told her to rest,she refused
You compelled her to rest or eat again(as what)she still refused.
Then you walk up to her to touch her shoulder to compel her to eattttt(oshay!baby siting job)
Na waooo...
My guy just say your intention was not to rape her but lure her...
Mtchewww.
Abeg who carry the list of Mbaka prophecies, I wan check something

czarr:
Wetin carry your hand go her shoulder ...i no trust you guy

Me sef no trust am sef..on top say make she come chop..na by force..Bad guy..lol

arukwe123:
but the other guy was 100% sure OP intended to rape the maid.

Don't mind that guy jor. I'm even suspecting that he could be a rapist himself.
Rape requires violence to be termed as such.
Clearly there was no violence in this naration other than the plan of Mr smooth guy gone horribly wrong

DeLaRue:


The biggest issue here is not whether he intended to rape or not. The biggest issue is the fact that he approached and touched a lady he barely knew inappropriately and in a way that might have frightened the lady and led her to believe she was in imminent danger of rape/sexual assault.

It is quite an unusual way to behave. Someone told you twice that they didn't need your help. Shortly afterwards, you walked towards them offering yet again to help, only this time raising your arm to a part of their body. Ofcourse the lady would have been frightened, and think the worst was about to happen. Remember, they were the only two people in the office.

Even if you give the Op the benefit of the doubt about his true intention, he displayed very poor judgement. And if you were his boss, and a lady, I think you'd be asking yourself whether you can be totally safe being alone with him in your office. His employer clearly lost trust in him, and rightly sacked him.

I know the OP was foolish. I was even angry while reading the story. I was just responding to guy already labeling OP as a rapist. If he had said sexual harrassment, that woulda be fine, but rape is not a word you just throw around. Calling someone a rapist by mere assumption is not right.

MrBrownJay1:
if this story is true, then you only fell into a trap that was set just to sack you, free of charge!

as for that useless lawyer you call "ex boss", who was quick to believe that you tried to rape her maid, i weep for Nigeria.

Absolutely.

If the OP is telling the truth, then his Madame had set a trap for him.


Maybe your Boss told the maide to be weary of you and your approach triggered what her Madame told her.

ambassadorgozie:


my namesake, i hear u

Even if you will not carry out the treats. Make sure that you are serious while telling her that. Provided that you are saying the whole truth of not trying to do anything funny.

Some people do not know the gravity of what they are doing attimes. They think that rape allegations is a child’s play.


Some people do not really know what RAPE is.

ambassadorgozie:
6th of January 2020 is the day I won’t forget. I work as a personal assistant/secretary to my boss who happens to be a former politician.

My boss came to work with her housemaid for her to help in sweeping, cleaning and tidying up the office being the resumption day. She instructed us on how to go about it before she stepped out from the office promising to come back in the afternoon.

We started the work immediately until afternoon time when I decided to rest and eat. While eating I beckoned the grown up housemaid to come and eat or at least rest before she continues the cleaning but she declined. After like an hour, I told her to rest small, she declined yet again. This prompted me to go close to her in order to convince her to eat something or rest.

My worst mistake and nightmare was attempting to put my hand on her shoulder in my stupid bid to convince her. Immediately my hand touched her shoulder she started shouting continuously that I want to rape her, that she will deal with me; in fact that I will get sacked. At first I told her my intention, but she wouldn’t hear me, I then resorted to pleading, I even knelt down begging her that it wasn’t my intention to rape or grab her. She couldn’t stand my talks and pleading, she called the boss immediately telling her that I want to rape her. We narrated everything to the boss, (a lawyer), when she returned. After hearing from us she said she has stayed with her maid for couple of years, thus she trust her, and it may be true that I wanted to rape her or lure her for sex. She couldn’t see my explanation, pleadings and even crying. She said she has two options; either to call police for me or to sack me. That’s how she later sacked me that day.

I have been devastated and depressed since that day, not because of the sack but the allegation and accusation that was not even on my mind. The worst is that as an introvert I have no one to talk to, I am damn down.

Notes: 1. I have no intention of raping, grabbing or having sex with her
2. I will not be so stupid to rape or have sex with the housemaid in the office knowing that the boss will come at any time
3. I have not raped anyone or plan to do so in the future because I know is morally and legally wrong.

Bro sorry for that but waiting carry ur hand for her shoulder I strongly believe if she mistakly open it you will give it hot tru dey back ,

scantee:


The op could be saying the truth, i have witnessed lots of this kind story myself, some girls can be devil tool just to mess up your life.

#STRONGVILLAGEPEOPLE#

what did the girl do? Minding her business, cleaning the office her madam asked her to clean. The Op was there involving her in small talk, next pleading with her to come and eat and rest, she said no. And then placed his shoulder on her. A complete stranger, someone she was seeing for the 1st time in her life. Check it well naa

ideabuilder:
But putting my hand around a lady waist does not means rape na. there's nothing in story that suggest rape. Sexual advances maybe.

I really need someone to give me definition of RAPE I beg. Seems touching is now rape

Sexual advance is different from sexual harassment, both can lead to rape though

If what the op described is the true story (which cannot be confirmed by any of us until the girl says her own story), then I'll say she went far by saying he tried to rape her

IMO: Sexual advance becomes sexual harassment when the person being advanced upon categorically express it they don't welcome the sexual advance especially when body touching becomes involved

https://www.globalworkplaceinsider.com/2014/07/sexual-advancement-v-sexual-harassment/

Dear OP, put yourself in the shoes of your boss.

You are PA/secretary to a politically exposed person. Good judgement and discretion is therefore part of your JD.

A person you were just seeing for the first time told you "no thank u, I'm not eating" and yet u stood up and went to put hand on her shoulder? That shows a gross lack of sense.

Even your boss doesn't believe the rape claim, she has to think about whether or not your head is correct enof to do that work

Move on with your life!

logon599:
OP from your story it's clearly one of two things. Either:
1. The maid has suffered some form of sexual abuse in the past which has left her with a phobia and your seeming innocuous touch reignited a bad memory from the past, putting her on high alert, or
2. It wasn't her shoulder you touched.

i swear it was her shoulder

I hardly come to nairaland to comment. From your explanation, you over step your boundary. The maid was left with you in the office to get you implicated. Do not be surprised that she followed the instructions of her Madam/Boss. The woman was trying to do away with you without paying you any compensation, remember this is 2020. 2019 didn't finished on a good note for her personally or professionally! Why should you be sacked when she hasn't see you in such a situation before? He was a politician, maybe currently there is no good prospect from that side. She has been thinking of a way to let you go on something like this. When She sacked you being 6th January of the year. She want to start on a new ground with an intern that's aggressive and not after money but an experience from law firm. Bro, wake up, the year is still very fresh. Better opportunities are ahead of you

ambassadorgozie:
6th of January 2020 is the day I won’t forget. I work as a personal assistant/secretary to my boss who happens to be a former politician.

My boss came to work with her housemaid for her to help in sweeping, cleaning and tidying up the office being the resumption day. She instructed us on how to go about it before she stepped out from the office promising to come back in the afternoon.

We started the work immediately until afternoon time when I decided to rest and eat. While eating I beckoned the grown up housemaid to come and eat or at least rest before she continues the cleaning but she declined. After like an hour, I told her to rest small, she declined yet again. This prompted me to go close to her in order to convince her to eat something or rest.

My worst mistake and nightmare was attempting to put my hand on her shoulder in my stupid bid to convince her. Immediately my hand touched her shoulder she started shouting continuously that I want to rape her, that she will deal with me; in fact that I will get sacked. At first I told her my intention, but she wouldn’t hear me, I then resorted to pleading, I even knelt down begging her that it wasn’t my intention to rape or grab her. She couldn’t stand my talks and pleading, she called the boss immediately telling her that I want to rape her. We narrated everything to the boss, (a lawyer), when she returned. After hearing from us she said she has stayed with her maid for couple of years, thus she trust her, and it may be true that I wanted to rape her or lure her for sex. She couldn’t see my explanation, pleadings and even crying. She said she has two options; either to call police for me or to sack me. That’s how she later sacked me that day.

I have been devastated and depressed since that day, not because of the sack but the allegation and accusation that was not even on my mind. The worst is that as an introvert I have no one to talk to, I am damn down.

Notes: 1. I have no intention of raping, grabbing or having sex with her
2. I will not be so stupid to rape or have sex with the housemaid in the office knowing that the boss will come at any time
3. I have not raped anyone or plan to do so in the future because I know is morally and legally wrong.

JJOF:

Baba me no be touchy touchy oo, I just dey surprise say touching shoulder na sexual harassment.

lol OK

Next time if you want to convince someone to eat, KEEP yYOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF. I hope you have learnt your lesson.
I wish you best in getting another job

Ps: Maybe she had had a bad experience.
Why it's good to respect everyone’s spaces

Kobicove:


For someone who claims to be the PA to a lawyer your grammar is terrible.

Geez! Stop using these annoying abbreviations like a teenager and learn to write like a professional!

This is not an English class !

ambassadorgozie:
6th of January 2020 is the day I won’t forget. I work as a personal assistant/secretary to my boss who happens to be a former politician.

My boss came to work with her housemaid for her to help in sweeping, cleaning and tidying up the office being the resumption day. She instructed us on how to go about it before she stepped out from the office promising to come back in the afternoon.

We started the work immediately until afternoon time when I decided to rest and eat. While eating I beckoned the grown up housemaid to come and eat or at least rest before she continues the cleaning but she declined. After like an hour, I told her to rest small, she declined yet again. This prompted me to go close to her in order to convince her to eat something or rest.

My worst mistake and nightmare was attempting to put my hand on her shoulder in my stupid bid to convince her. Immediately my hand touched her shoulder she started shouting continuously that I want to rape her, that she will deal with me; in fact that I will get sacked. At first I told her my intention, but she wouldn’t hear me, I then resorted to pleading, I even knelt down begging her that it wasn’t my intention to rape or grab her. She couldn’t stand my talks and pleading, she called the boss immediately telling her that I want to rape her. We narrated everything to the boss, (a lawyer), when she returned. After hearing from us she said she has stayed with her maid for couple of years, thus she trust her, and it may be true that I wanted to rape her or lure her for sex. She couldn’t see my explanation, pleadings and even crying. She said she has two options; either to call police for me or to sack me. That’s how she later sacked me that day.

I have been devastated and depressed since that day, not because of the sack but the allegation and accusation that was not even on my mind. The worst is that as an introvert I have no one to talk to, I am damn down.

Notes: 1. I have no intention of raping, grabbing or having sex with her
2. I will not be so stupid to rape or have sex with the housemaid in the office knowing that the boss will come at any time
3. I have not raped anyone or plan to do so in the future because I know is morally and legally wrong.

If what you wrote here is true, then know this:
Ur madam had planned to replace you with a new person this year.
She does not know hw to sack you or tell you she doesn't want to work with u any longer
The best way is to set u up with her housemaid.
She was instructed to make trouble and accuse u if u dare comes close to her.

If you had not gone close to that girl, she would've do something that will still make her accuse you of one thing or the other just to rope u into what u are not guilty of.

ambassadorgozie:


guy dis is d truth, i know wia to go if i want sex

When you beckoned on her to come eat and she declines why did you have to go extra mile? Learn to always mind your business. This is a huge lesson for you

Questionnaire
Dear Respondent,

I am Esah Peter Ogbu (F/HD/17/3610094), a student of Mass Communication Department, Yaba College of Technology conducting a research on Citizen Journalism and Fake News in Nigeria: a study of Legit.ng and Nairaland websites.

This is in partial fulfilment of the requirement of the award of Higher National Diploma (HND).

You have been chosen as one of the respondents of the study. Your response would be treated with utmost confidentiality.

Kindly assist in filling the Questionnaire.



https://docs.google.com/forms/d/11mpT7b2PPAZxu-kPSgmkRjWT_Y5VvSzgKkNRhPp3pQ4/edit#response=ACYDBNieJrPGXKSAdlO91uaNs-926ZUP6VlgeKsab75BPxOCeBWO1qwIWRhFE18N473nM8c