Michellekabod2:
exactly my point.
I even started out by calling her out for her actions towards her sister.

Why it seems people are condemning her because he is broke is because few condemned his actions with an underage as statutory rape,the lines used in rebuking the couple was mostly his financial state. .

In issues like this is hard to get a balanced view. If we had this balanced view all this words exchange will not occur. The thread is indeed long and has served its purpose,I just hope she reconciles with her family and move on with her life.
At least we can teach our kids lessons from this: the dangers of premarital sex and how not to act out of anger

Trust me, the issue here stems farrr from the pedophile's financial status. It totally has nothing to do with it. Personally, I felt it was absolutely cold for op to allow her (permit me to use the word irresponsible) boyfriend to mete such treatment at her sister. I have younger ones and my kid sister is around 17. If any man puts her in this condition ( God forbid) you won't expect me to give him a gold medal. Moreso, it must have been disappointing for the op's elder sister to see her sister frollicking with the same man who put her in the family way. Did you read the part where the op said they BOTH beat her up and that was why she locked them up? Like the pedophile who puts my sister in a family way laying his hands on me because he overstepped his boundaries by coming to my house? Can you tolerate that? Has it not occurred to you that there isnt smoke without fire? She may have asked him to leave (albeit in her usual insultive way) and he refused, thus the rancor.


She dropped out of school due to her condition, but don't people get pregnant, give birth and bounce back to their normal lives(school)? In op's case, she chose to continue with that same man...and you expect the sister to be happy? Let's not make the victim the villain here. Although her choice of words were not stellar, but is that a good enough reason to do such to her. MARRIAGE/RELATIONSHIPS ARE MEANT TO UNITE FAMILIES AND NOT TEAR THEM APART... Thus if her boyfriend could harbour such plan against her sister,it means he may wake up one day to suggest that she kills her entire family and the airhead would definitely buy into the plan and that is my worry with the man... He is irresponsible and there is a high probability that he is not serious about his situationship. Real men won't take advantage of 14 year olds and if he meant well for them,by now, he would have secured a place for them ( even if its in a shanty) to protect the LO from possible assault.



Lastly, nobody hates the op( I for one don't and I am sure Ehibbigirl and the others don't as well) but it seems she is not totally sober from her actions and inactions.

yeyeosoronga:
I dont think people realise the deviousness it takes to set/frame someone up. Not just by telling lies upon them, but to go out of your way, employ people to orchestrate such a plan.
The bigger picture shows the man and woman in question can actually frame others up for murder, fraud even without batting an eyelid under the pretence that they deserved it because of one slight or the other.
I'm almost sure what they have also done is a criminal offence. Where are the lawyers and the law enforcement guys here? Malicious intent could possibly be one of the charges, and harassment of the sis fiance is another
And some of you expect any sensible person to support their action?
Its same way people compare physical violence to verbal violence. but the law doesn't see them comparable.
While I couldn't give a rat's ass about OP and her shenanigans, there is no justification whatsoever for what she did and that's not because I care so much for the sister either

Exactly! The op and her abuser outdid themselves and its funny to see people trying to coin out a reasonable angle as to why they may have done that. Judging by the op's demeanor, she may have always been stubborn, the sister may have warned her countless times before the mistake...


I am an elder sister and the way I look out for my sisters is second to none. The day I saw my immediate younger sister (above 18) strolling with an opposite sex, I pretty much accosted her from him, interrogated her and when i wasn't sure of her replies. I involved soldiers to warn the guy from the other end to steer clear. That is the length elder sisters can go to protect their blood. So I totally feel the pain of the op's sister and all the hurtful things she said were borne out of that pain.

midnighter:


I see where youre coming from but to be honest, I think your comment yesterday was misleading. It was when I saw somebody answering you and opening the whole "sister debate" up again that I decided to talk because both of you were moving towards unnecessary extremes.

We are not condemning her because he is broke. We ended up trading insults with her, some of which included the fact that he is broke. Those 2 actions are not the same thing.

They actually condemned her because of her horrible attitude and her refusal to come up with any kind of concrete plan that didnt involve leeching from her sister. The entitlement was too much.

The underage stuff was mentioned quite a lot but was not as relevant to the topic because the point was, what are you going to do now? The "broke" aspect came up because of the lack of direction she displayed now that she has decided to continue the relationship as an adult.

Even when somebody advised that she gets the man to do a low-key introduction to give them some small self-respect, she began to attack the person. Does it make sense?

Yesterday in another thread the OP was in a relationship with an abroad-based man for 10 years with no plan for their future; she was still insulted even though we dont know what the man does. It is disingenuous to claim that everybody just piled on top of this babe solely because the man doesnt have money.

No, it was due to the way she answered everybody back. Being poor, being a carwasher, or squatting with friends are not crimes but they became ammunition for people to knock some sense into her head because of all the nonsense she was writing to people here.

If the dude was wealthy and she began to insult everybody who tried to advise her, the same thing would have occurred so I personally dont support this narrative youre pushing of women being so money-hungry that they are unable to call a spade a spade.

God bless you, we don't give a fricking frack about his financial status but the whole situationship, just like you mentioned it. Apt!

James289:
If anything should happen to your sister remember kama will find you sooner or later. Better look for her fiancé and correct what you started

Hasn't karma caught up with her?

kingphilip:

Gosh! I can only imagine the sister's pain right now!!! Please God, do not make my siblings become the vile over me and/or each other.

And you think if the guy was responsible and not broke, all this problem would have occurred?

He would have married her out of her sister's sight.

Michellekabod2:
you forgot that instead of offering advice many were offering blame before she started her rudeness.you don't know what it is to have a toxic sister that torments you for years,the psychological impact.

Most people attack her because she choose to stay with her man. Their anger here is they feel all this is for a man. They should leave the young naive girl alone.

I don't know what it is to be approached by a broke guy,have no experience in it,but I believe every dating is part of growing up. Its part of making mistakes and learning from it. Each failed relationship draws us closer to our life partner.
People condemning her may have done worse for guys.

If he were a rich guy will they attack the couples as they do? Take it from me,the judgemental comments she gets is not because she wronged her sister,but because the guy is broke.
We ladies can be selective on who we call desperate/pickmesha. If desperation/obsession is done for a rich dude,its deemed worth it. But if its done for a broke dude you are called names. Its not about your self dignity but his pocket.

There is a case of one moniker named ca.salinda that has been opening threads upon threads for a guy that clearly isn't in love with her but has been opting for how to dispose her,nobody calls her pickmesha/desperate even when she begs him to stay. Why? Because he is rich!

No one is asking how the baby is doing or asking her to write jamb as she is still young . all we are interested in is insulting her because of her broke boyfriend.

You will never know peace, what your sister is facing today yourself and your foolish boyfriend will get it back in million times.what a wicked soul you are

Look at this stupid fool and who are you to tell me that I will never know peace ? Are u God the almighty the giver of peace? For your information God has already forgiven me, I have the best peace ever and my life is going well and everything is working according to God plans and is you and your fake accounts that will not know peace Stupid fool go hang yourself and die

Diiiamoond:

You will never know peace, what your sister is facing today yourself and your foolish boyfriend will get it back in million times.what a wicked soul you are

Lol
This thread is still alive?

Yes!
We will keep the trend until op is at least able to realize or make peace with her siblings n parent

CHoccolaTE:
Lol
This thread is still alive?

I will keep reading until the OP receive the awakening.

I hope everyone can deduce now that good education helps us develop reasonably and make us sound people. It is direly essential for everyone to get that exposure to at least learn how to reason intelligently. If only OP's abuser allowed her to concentrate at school instead of using priccck to distract her...it is well.

sisisioge:
I will keep reading until the OP receive the awakening.

I hope everyone can deduce now that good education helps us develop reasonably and make us sound people. It is direly essential for everyone to get that exposure to at least learn how to reason intelligently. If only OP's abuser allowed her to concentrate at school instead of using priccck to distract her...it is well.

I hope everyone can deduce now that good education helps us develop reasonably and make us sound people.


I don't entirely agree with this... I have seen Ph.D individuals misbehave and handle issues badly.. In as much as formal education is sacrosanct.... It doesn't make us all sound people.

babyfaceafrica:


I hope everyone can deduce now that good education helps us develop reasonably and make us sound people.


I don't entirely agree with this... I have seen Ph.D individuals misbehave and handle issues badly.. In as much as formal education is sacrosanct.... It doesn't make us all sound people.

Well, you are somewhat correct that its no guarantee, however, the possibility of having an educated fool is lesser than having an uneducated idioot. Education really do affect our reasoning to a large extent. Imagine what this girl would have sounded like with some education....her reasoning would have been a lot better. You do know that they teach logic in school, right?

Read this post from page 1 to 47
@ Op, please, I only care about your daughter cos I am a mother too.
Please watch her closely since you and your husband are still squatting with his friends.
Child molesters are people close to the parents so please don't let your guard down and don't trust anybody.
I pray God provides for both of you so you can move out and get an apartment but for now, please, watch your daughter closely.

sisisioge:


Well, you are somewhat correct that its no guarantee, however, the possibility of having an educated fool is lesser than having an uneducated idioot. Education really do affect our reasoning to a large extent. Imagine what this girl would have sounded like with some education....her reasoning would have been a lot better. You do know that they teach logic in school, right?

Very right

Your sister never hated u or ur guy. She was only trying to create space between u and ur guy so u won't get pregnant again to a jobless and homeless guy.

May God forgive u and ur guy

nuban07:
Your sister never hated u or ur guy. She was only trying to create space between u and ur guy so u won't get pregnant again to a jobless and homeless guy.

May God forgive u and ur guy

My guy is not jobless he works hard for me , his daughter and our unborn baby to be well. We don’t lack anything

Ifyjos:

My guy is not jobless he works hard for me , his daughter and our unborn baby to be well. We don’t lack anything

You’re pregnant again? Na wa o. Which one be unborn baby na?

Ifyjos:

My guy is not jobless he works hard for me , his daughter and our unborn baby to be well. We don’t lack anything

You still need to beg ur sister, she wanted the best for u. Though she might ve hurt u doing that

Ginaz:


You’re pregnant again? Na wa o. Which one be unborn baby na?

Yes am pregnant and what’s your problem?

nuban07:


You still need to beg ur sister, she wanted the best for u. Though she might ve hurt u doing that

I have already apologise to her she refused to forgive me there’s no need for me to keep begging her . Is she God?

Ifyjos:

Yes am pregnant and what’s your problem?

Well, If you ask me I would have said you’re better off with one child for the main time till your baby daddy is strong financially to rent his own house and take properly care of you and your first child.

No house yet, no financial means to make life better than the way it is currently so why bring another child to this struggle life?

When you were busy having sex tournament with him after leaving your family’s house, you both should have made plans for the future, go to the hospital for family planning .

Na wa o babe . You should not do this to yourself cos you’re still a young girl . You want to turn to a baby machine at this young age ? No financial backup, no school, no job, no vision , no actions for a better life at all!!

Na struggle life you want ? Pity the kids small and yourself too. Stress life is not good, it makes you age faster than your mates . Well congratulations... what do I know? Cos I was thinking after this your first child, you would go back to school or learn a trade. ... not to get pregnant a second time .

Ginaz:


Well, If you ask me I would have said you’re better off with one child for the main time till your baby daddy is strong financially to rent his own house and take properly care of you and your first child.

No house yet, no financial means to make life better than the way it is currently so why bring another child to this struggle life?

When you were busy having sex tournament with him after leaving your family’s house, you both should have made plans for the future, go to the hospital for family planning .

Na wa o babe . You should not do this to yourself cos you’re still a young girl . You want to turn to a baby machine at this young age ? No financial backup, no school, no job, no vision , no actions for a better life at all!!

Na struggle life you want ? Pity the kids small and yourself too. Stress life is not good, it makes you age faster than your mates . Well congratulations... what do I know? Cos I was thinking after this your first child, you would go back to school or learn a trade. ... not to get pregnant a second time .

Who school epp? Anyway you will never see me in your house begging you for money to feed my children even if I had 4 of them my guy and I will be taking good care of them with the little we have.

Ifyjos:

Who school epp? Anyway you will never see me in your house begging you for money to feed my children even if I had 4 of them my guy and I will be taking good care of them with the little we have.

The matter is not about begging , stop being sentimental. This is a serious issue ifyjos. You’re too talented , beautiful, filled with blessings and potentials to limit yourself to be a baby mama , living with your baby daddy in his friend’s house with no vision for a better future and you’re obviously satisfied with all these with no passion to exceed beyond this stagnation you have put yourself .

You can be better, live a better life , you deserve more than you currently are right now . If you can’t go to school, you can learn a skill, or a trade to give you a secured future babe .

Do something with your life other than being a Baby mama and waiting for your baby daddy to take care of you all.

You can get more than the little you have to take care of your kids . Don’t settle for little or less. Expand your dreams and vision.

You want to live a “we will manage and little we have life?”

Will that kind of mentality take the kids through school? Pay rent? emergency money nko? You will be running from pillar to post to sort finances? What have you put in place to make sure the kids have a sound education as possibly could without interruptions ?

Ginaz:


The matter is not about begging , stop being sentimental. This is a serious issue ifyjos. You’re too talented , beautiful, filled with blessings and potentials to limit yourself to be a baby mama , living with your baby daddy in his friend’s house with no vision for a better future and you’re obviously satisfied with all these with no passion to exceed beyond this stagnation you have put yourself .

You can be better, live a better life , you deserve more than you currently are right now . If you can’t go to school, you can learn a skill, or a trade to give you a secured future babe .

Do something with your life other than being a Baby mama and waiting for your baby daddy to take care of you all.

Who told you that I have no vision for a better future ? You just want to talk rubbish so people can likes your rubbish advice please ooo I don’t need your advice because it will not change anything in my life , I’m happy the way am leaving my life your cheap talk won’t stop me . go and preach to your little sisters. You are jealous because you don’t have a man and you wished to be in my place

Ginaz:
You can get more than the little you have to take care of your kids . Don’t settle for little or less. Expand your dreams and vision.

You want to live a “we will manage and little we have life?”

Will that kind of mentality take the kids through school? Pay rent? emergency money nko? You will be running from pillar to post to sort finances? What have you put in place to make sure the kids have a sound education as possibly could without interruptions ?

And what have you achieved so far ? Apart from being here 24/7 making comments what else do you have in life ? You are jobless

Ifyjos:

Who told you that I have no vision for a better future ? You just want to talk rubbish so people can likes your rubbish advice please ooo I don’t need your advice because it will not change anything in my life , I’m happy the way am leaving my life your cheap talk won’t stop me . go and preach to your little sisters. You are jealous because you don’t have a man and you wished to be in my place

why do you talk with bitterness? That lady, she is only trying to help. God will answer your prayer when you ask BUT remember the bible say we should ASK WITH WISDOM.

Ifyjos:

And what have you achieved so far ? Apart from being here 24/7 making comments what else do you have in life ? You are jobless

Urgggg!!! Don’t think everyone who gives you advice is jobless . It’s so boring when you talk like that. You call people jobless a lot and it’s very much pathetic and doesn’t tell how intelligent you are. Someone who is emotionally intelligent and psychologically advance won’t talk that way.

Any small thing “I won’t beg, you are joblesss and bla . It’s so pathetic you don’t wanna see how urgent it is for you to make drastic and life changing decisions. Even more so pathetic you reason like a naive person. Well, bye and safe delivery of your child .

malvisguy212:
why do you talk with bitterness? That lady, she is only trying to help. God will answer your prayer when you ask BUT remember the bible say we should ASK WITH WISDOM.

She is not helping but mocking me and do you want me to clap my hands for her ?

Ifyjos:

Who told you that I have no vision for a better future ? You just want to talk rubbish so people can likes your rubbish advice please ooo I don’t need your advice because it will not change anything in my life , I’m happy the way am leaving my life your cheap talk won’t stop me . go and preach to your little sisters. You are jealous because you don’t have a man and you wished to be in my place

Nope .. I rather be single than be in your place .no normal filled with potentials and vision young lady would choose the life you live . To be a mother and expecting another living with her boyfriend in his friend’s house with no job, just going from hand to mouth , very ok with such a stagnant life . What is there to envy or wished for ?

You simply think too highly of yourself more than you are worth dear.

Ginaz:


Urgggg!!! Don’t think everyone who gives you advice is jobless . It’s so boring when you talk like that. You call people jobless a lot and it’s very much pathetic and doesn’t tell how intelligent you are. Someone who is emotionally intelligent and psychologically advance won’t talk that way.

Any small thing “I won’t beg, you are joblesss and bla . It’s so pathetic you don’t wanna see how urgent it is for you to make drastic and life changing decisions. Even more so pathetic you reason like a naive person. Well, bye and safe delivery of your child .

Yes I’m not intelligent and you that is more intelligent why don’t you go there and give solutions for corona to stop so the world can be at peace again? Anyway call me whatever you like I don’t care. Your mates are there sleeping next to their husbands and you are here putting mouth on thing that doesn’t concern you. Go marry and leave me alone