₦airaland Forum

CHoccolaTE:
And she thinks she is very intelligent ooo

ibkayee:
No that's not it. If you actually read the OP let's be honest with ourselves
It’s a writeup that basically asserts that marriage is somehow inherently a better purpose than work, but done in a way that attempts to be lowkey by way of just alluding to things. Perhaps if she had just stated her preference rather than ‘telling’ people what the standard is along with the usual thinly veiled patronizing tone and smugness, people wouldn’t have been as turned off.

Her vibe is very 'white woman tears'(the stereotype) adjacent to me

Elder00001:
32 and you act more old school than the real old school folks. Interesting.

CHoccolaTE:
And she thinks she is very intelligent ooo

Elder00001:
Women like her are one of the reasons why patriarchy is still well grounded in most societies.

ibkayee:
Lmao, realised I was calling you amazonjoy when I meant almond

I miss her too

Elder00001:
Women like her are one of the reasons why patriarchy is still well grounded in most societies.

CHoccolaTE:
Very true but she doesnt know that.

I get that she has a need to make the world a better place, underneath all the funny threads her intention is to be objective and realistic and to help people but the messages in her threads are a bit misogynistic and controversial
And even deliberately attention seeking sometimes
In any case it doesn't warrant ganging up on her sha, everyone is entitled to their opinion no matter how shocking it seems, I saw someone saying buka should not have daughters up there, Haba that is taking it too far nau.

bukatyne:
I don't think I am intelligent; I know I am.

I am very very self aware of myself so I know myself.

You would agree with me it takes a lot of intelligence and self-awareness to go past whatever you have been spoon fed on all fronts (religious, educational, life) and merge your own person.

It is very easy to read something online and jump on the wagon whether it applies to you or not. It is also easy to talk about problems on the surface without digging deep to do an analysis of the root cause. 'Why is this thing the way it is?' 'If we change Y, could be result be different?' 'Is Z happening because X was not taken care of?' 'Can X work in Nigeria? If no, what is a fairer alternative?' 'Am I getting Z results because I support Y even though I close my eyes to W?'

For instance, I find quota system very harmful to feminism. The moment you think women need to be given a quota to represent in a position by merit, you have automatically said 'they are lesser than men so can't compete.'

And it doesn't even help them.

A classic example is Northern Nigeria. The cut off mark is less than 10 for boys in some Northern state while some southern states which is same for male & female is 100+.

Are Northerners more educated today?

Nope.

bukatyne:
@bold:

When I told a poster that marriage and work are both means to an end and compared the difference between purpose and work?
[b]Work is to provide your means of livelihood: Marriage is for companionship, prevention of adultery and raising godly children.

Marriage like work is also a means to an end.

The advantage of focusing on marriage over work is that you train kids who will carry on with your legacy.

Marriage however differs in that it affects every other decision and fulfillment of your purpose.

To break it down, let's use Mary (the mother of Jesus) as an example:

Mary's purpose was to birth the savior (Jesus Christ). Let's assume she was a farmer (the Bible didn't say), that's her work. She was married to Joseph (an excellent choice because he was godly, fair and righteous).

Imagine Joseph was a rebebe man: it would not have been easy for her to fulfill her purpose; she might never have even fulfilled it.

That's why I would rate marriage above work.

Some other examples of work vs purpose are:

1. Jesus Christ: He was a carpenter (work) however, his purpose was to save the world.

2. Peter: Was a fisherman (work), his purpose was to be an apostle and being Christ to the Jews.

Etc. Etc.

Discover your purpose (the hard part), then marry someone who keys into that purpose and vice versa. While at it, you would surely have a work to earn a living.[/b]

This line is lifted directly from the OP:
Every body has the duty to discover their purpose and fulfill it.

In summary, work is just work: a means to an end of living a better life and fulfilling your purpose/assignment in earth.

This is another line capturing everything;
Discover your purpose (the hard part), then marry someone who keys into that purpose and vice versa. While at it, you would surely have a work to earn a living.

How can I think marriage is our purpose and tell people to look for it?

You'all should just admit you saw bukatyne and went bonkers

CHoccolaTE:
Very true but she doesnt know that.

I get that she has a need to make the world a better place, underneath all the funny threads her intention is to be objective and realistic and to help people but the messages in her threads are a bit misogynistic and controversial
And even deliberately attention seeking sometimes
In any case it doesn't warrant ganging up on her sha, everyone is entitled to their opinion no matter how shocking it seems, I saw someone saying buka should not have daughters up there, Haba that is taking it too far nau.

Elder00001:
The only reason you’re supporting bukatyne isn’t because people are attacking her but because you also share the same archaic views.
If the lady being attacked was someone with feminist views like coco candy or poco hantas, we both know you’d never have been on their side.
I wonder the kinda village that bukatyne grow up in that made her to hold such ridiculous beliefs.

You two are gonna be schooled tonight.

OchoL:
Another alternate created by Biglittleliar AKA fuzzywuzzy AKA kaamisha.

ONLY this time, shes pretending to be a (m). Lmaoo!

Acidosis:
I think your opinion is based on your perception of the moniker. She's one of the few persons here that carry "marriage matter for head" yeah, which isn't bad as many of her antagonists want us to believe.

Even if the purpose is to tell us that marriage is somehow better than work, it's still an opinion although I don't think she's compared both in anyway.

I am convinced a lot of people are threatened by her personality and values about life, marriage and family.

The message I've seen here shouldn't in anyway be a threat. I hold stronger, probably more annoying ideas about career and family.

CHoccolaTE:
Very true but she doesnt know that.

I get that she has a need to make the world a better place, underneath all the funny threads her intention is to be objective and realistic and to help people but the messages in her threads are a bit misogynistic and controversial
And even deliberately attention seeking sometimes
In any case it doesn't warrant ganging up on her sha, everyone is entitled to their opinion no matter how shocking it seems, I saw someone saying buka should not have daughters up there, Haba that is taking it too far nau.

KanwuliaExtra:
Daz alright.
I looooovit.

crackkhaus:
Who I support is my prerogative, no one gets to decide that for me...certainly not ghost-fvcker like you.

You will also need to first get yourself a Double Degree along with at least one Master's, before you can even attempt to school me on anything.

ibkayee:
I said you insinuated that marriage is a better purpose than work.

You say everyone has a duty to fulfill their purpose then contradict yourself by saying 'work in itself cannot give satisfaction hence replacing your family with 'work' always ends in tears.' and 'That is a work/job: it gives you money and the fine things of life however, it can never give fulfillment.'

You're not the first person to have contradictory views to someone...your messages are just confusing sometimes and your tone often comes across as imposing

Also, all this 'we saw you and went bonkers' talk, as humans we naturally have impressions of people and things. If someone has a history of a certain thing, it's normal to associate you with a type of topic and vibe. It happens to everyone, you're just a little more polarizing than the average. You're the same person who made a topic justifying marital rape, it's not unreasonable to have a 'strong' opinion on someone like that lol

fieryy:
As in, I'm actually starting to feel bad for her. It's not that deep. If she wants to be that kind of wife /woman, let her be. I just think she shouldn't be projecting her beliefs on others. As for her stance on rape, those have and should be rightfully called out.

Elder00001:
Coward.

bukatyne:
Me ke?

The fact that you spoke ten pages about your family FIRST with pictures is proof enough for me.

The thread was not even about family to start with.