₦airaland Forum

yettymuse:
His sexual needs may be more than the bills he pays.
Does he take care of his woman’s needs?? Is she still working?? Does he spoil her? Is she COMFORTABLE??

You think it’s easy to take care of 2kids and a Bigger Baby! Y’all cut these women some slacks!

You think it’s just to pay bills? In this age, lots of women can conveniently pay bills too...

If you don’t Moisturize a woman’s libido with good money, care and attention...she goes completely dry!

This is why I don’t find marriage interesting..especially in this part of the world.. plenty stress, no benefits no bag!
... all you got is a miserly MRS title that can’t even open doors! Taaaaaaaah! with a mad society expecting so much from you!

Unromantic Nigerian Men! Mtchewwww!!!

yettymuse:
His sexual needs may be more than the bills he pays.
Does he take care of his woman’s needs?? Is she still working?? Does he spoil her? Is she COMFORTABLE??

You think it’s easy to take care of 2kids and a Bigger Baby! Y’all cut these women some slacks!

You think it’s just to pay bills? In this age, lots of women can conveniently pay bills too...

If you don’t Moisturize a woman’s libido with good money, care and attention...she goes completely dry!

This is why I don’t find marriage interesting..especially in this part of the world.. plenty stress, no benefits no bag!
... all you got is a miserly MRS title that can’t even open doors! Taaaaaaaah! with a mad society expecting so much from you!

Unromantic Nigerian Men! Mtchewwww!!!

yettymuse:
His sexual needs may be more than the bills he pays.
Does he take care of his woman’s needs?? Is she still working?? Does he spoil her? Is she COMFORTABLE??

You think it’s easy to take care of 2kids and a Bigger Baby! Y’all cut these women some slacks!

You think it’s just to pay bills? In this age, lots of women can conveniently pay bills too...

If you don’t Moisturize a woman’s libido with good money, care and attention...she goes completely dry!

This is why I don’t find marriage interesting..especially in this part of the world.. plenty stress, no benefits no bag!
... all you got is a miserly MRS title that can’t even open doors! Taaaaaaaah! with a mad society expecting so much from you!

Unromantic Nigerian Men! Mtchewwww!!!

kikero:
I then urge you to sleep around with other women than your wife.

You will have lots of children who won't have their father full time, and who will at the end of the day wonder why their father cannot be with them.

At which point they would be pissed and angry with you.

To say nothing of the potential for STI's which you would pick up...(and which puts money in my fellow colleague's pockets by the way, so thanks on their behalf in advance).

One of my mates had a father who wasn't around full time. Yes, the man had side chicks. On his deathbed, my friend's father told him 'Son, don't treat your wife the way I treated your mother'.

Good morning. If my wife should sleep around, the fault is from her. I will never, ever ever betray my marital vows, even if it means looking like a fool. The complications of doing so are far worse (and yes, part of my job has included treating the fall out of such complications, which is the main reason why I am not a fan of having side chicks, even if the wife refuses to have s'x.)

If after what I have told you, I am still not making sense, you are free to sleep around. Be free. Go ahead, and keep side chicks. You don't need my permission to do so. As for me, I have done my job and told you of the cosequences.....plus keeping side chicks because your wife does not want to give you sex shows that you are not mature enough to have a conversation, or a relationship at all.

NigAmbassador:
Don't judge a feedback before you know why it was given...

I just quoted the part that isn't realistic and makes no sense in your post.

A child can not curse his/her parent... The Holy Bible records that such "...candle light will be blown off..."

Hope we understand each other...

kikero:
Well, maybe not curse, but hate and disrespect the parent that cheats.

Tunjingwu:
So I met my childhood friend yesterday at lekki.
He is still the elegant young man he has always been.

We spoke at length.
Nothing much has changed about him.
He is still very enthusiastic about life. An Engineer who after working with a firm is now on his own. Things are not very rosy but he can still hold his own.

We started talking about family since we all are married abielt for few years.

Here is the gist.....

He is contemplating having a girlfriend.
His wife hardly have sex with him.
Sometimes it takes 2 months for them to make love once. Nothing appears to be the problem other than the wife complaints of tiredness and not being in the mood for almost every time.
They have two kids(twins).

He had come to tell me to either approve or disapprove his strong intention of keeping a lady by the side since he can afford it comfortably.
I felt for him.

I disuaded him though I know how it feels to stay without sex with your wife under the same roof for months.

You pay all the bills yet you don't eat from the goody bag to your test.

Since yesterday, I have been a little worried for him. I do not know whether to call him and advise him to go ahead with his plan but try and be careful.

It's a dicey situation especially when the wife is not ready to change.

Righteousness89:
Two Wrongs do not make a Right!

When there is an issue in the Home, you look for Solutions not for More issues and Problems...

When you have tried all you can and it didn't bring Solution, you try to Reach out Carefully to Matured, Experienced and Godly People around you. It could be Godly Counsellors, or Someone you know she listens to..

Many things Today, Creep into Homes in Different Names, Forms and Sizes. Some are physical, some are Spirtual! All it seeks for is to Destroy Homes.

Once the unity of the Home is Cracked, you Expose your Home to Confusion and Calamities. Don't break the Hedge.

So, Advice your Friend not to use His hands to Set His Home Ablaze...

You see the guy right Below my Summation, Pls ignore that Summation .

Many of them Here do not Understand what Marriage is. They think Marriage is a One Night Stand where you Hop in and hop out!

mariahAngel:
In other words, ladies should keep on hopping from dyke to dyke till they find their "perfect match" right?

proclinician:
Personally I won't complain one bit. I won't even show any concern or ask about that.

Kalatium:
I find it funny when some guys say they can't wait to marry so they can have free access to pvssy.
It will shock them when their wife keeps refusing sex and they feel tempted to cheat.
Lesson: Marriage is not a Guarantee for free pvssy

tellsblinks:
all this things just to fnck my own wife??

marriage now looks like a burdern

westlius:
The issue with all this tin is when ur woman/wife knows u dont womanize she will be using her body to make shakara
But if she knows babes dey around u, she will ever joke with sex with u.
Because she knows she has competitors

HarunaWest:
Advice him to divorce his wife.. Marriage is not by force. I don't know why young men of nowadays dey fvck up anyhow.
Get married to someone else and enjoy your life...

HarunaWest:
Advice him to divorce his wife.. Marriage is not by force. I don't know why young men of nowadays dey fvck up anyhow.
Get married to someone else and enjoy your life...

WILLuKPquiet:
What would I do?

We will both find a solution. Like lubrication.

That is different from sex denial. Telling me she has head pain today, tomorrow back pain, next tomorrow leg pain. Who asks her to come do rigorous exercise. Lie down even if like a log of wood and let the man ease the tension.

Why do Women even act as if they are the ones doing the most job during sex. Is it not the man that does the "to and fro" movement? Who needs her on top? Let's do the conventional way and close the chapter.

If a woman is tired, let her lie down like a log of wood. Just allow your husband to do the thing in peace and go to sleep. It can't be up to twenty minutes.

When a Christian woman starts to think she is doing her husband a favour, when she has sex with him, she should know she is demon possessed already.

Nonsense and colloquial ingredients.

lagosrd:
What an excuse. Shamelessness of the highest order

abiambo:
U can bet money that you are not married. Not even in a relationship

Sixfeetbelle:
He said "to" and "fro" movement. Damn. Nigerian women haff suffered in men's hands.



Sex, to someone who doesn't enjoy it, is a chore. Lying down like a log of wood and letting you do all the work is if I enjoy it with you. Apologies for this graphic example, but that kind of sex you described is akin to being molested aka rape; constantly leaving your body for him to relieve himself. If It was me, to avoid this constant "abuse" of my body, I'll keep coming up with excuses to avoid the "unbearable" situation and hope you'd take a cue. I don't suppose you think a woman who manages to get through one sex session like this will be eager for next time?

The problem most men have is that they believe they're that good in bed and that lubrication solves everything. Dousing me in groundnut oil will not make me enjoy a boring sex. It's not a magic trick. The hormones don't work like that. If my mind, and my body, isn't in tune with the composite sexual drive, I won't enjoy it. Same with cases of a lot of women. People that sleep with oloshos know they're aren't there to care about the woman's satisfaction and somehow, unfortunately, carry that idea into marriage.

I'm glad you listed the bold as your line of action, unlike earlier when you were advising for side chips and divorce. But let me posit this to you. How do you intend on finding this solution you speak of, if lubrication fails?

Tunjingwu:
So I met my childhood friend yesterday at lekki.
He is still the elegant young man he has always been.

We spoke at length.
Nothing much has changed about him.
He is still very enthusiastic about life. An Engineer who after working with a firm is now on his own. Things are not very rosy but he can still hold his own.

We started talking about family since we all are married abielt for few years.

Here is the gist.....

He is contemplating having a girlfriend.
His wife hardly have sex with him.
Sometimes it takes 2 months for them to make love once. Nothing appears to be the problem other than the wife complaints of tiredness and not being in the mood for almost every time.
They have two kids(twins).

He had come to tell me to either approve or disapprove his strong intention of keeping a lady by the side since he can afford it comfortably.
I felt for him.

I disuaded him though I know how it feels to stay without sex with your wife under the same roof for months.

You pay all the bills yet you don't eat from the goody bag to your test.

Since yesterday, I have been a little worried for him. I do not know whether to call him and advise him to go ahead with his plan but try and be careful.

It's a dicey situation especially when the wife is not ready to change.

WILLuKPquiet:
First of all I never advised anyone to have side chicks. I want you to get straight. All I was saying is if the man eventually sin, which is possible except you are being hypocritical.
Giving your husband the chance to have sex with you once a month or once in two months could lead the man to sin. Or you want to pretend you don't know that?

No one is Angel. And even Angels are not perfect only God is.

How do you explain that. Sex once a montn in marriage because the wife doesn't feel like or husband doesn't feel like it.

Let tell you a true story of a welder man beside my office. The man is late now.
The wife denied him sex for more than five months and when the man was telling a friend about it, he bursted into tears. A grownup man shedding tears. You could imaging the emotional stress the man had gone through before crying like a baby.

You are here speaking grammar and condemning what I said. Is it not better for the woman to endure sex that to endure divorce.

Many of you don't even know that such acts could be as a result of an underlying sickness. If it is let her seek medical advice instead of tormenting the life of her husband now.
If I were a woman and I claim I love my husband, I would rather endure sex rather than allow push him into having a side chick of visiting Ashawo joints. Which will eventually lead to divorce one day.

Another example. I have a close moslem friend, Our offices were in the same premise. We used to discuss and tell each other some personal issues. He used to tell me how the wife used to deny him of sex for weeks.
Niwbit happened that we both left the area and its been more than two years. Recently months back, we were chatting on WhatsApp' and he just sent a picture of a pretty woman and he said, "do you remember this face?" I said "yes how would I forget the face so soon". This was a girl in the same premise where our offices were working as a secretary for a man. The lady is a Muslim. And extremely beautiful girl. My friend said
She's now my wife"
"How come?" i asked. He said he was seriously and said he now has two wives.

My point is, despite the fact that the religion of my friend supports more than one wife, he would not have married another woman if the one at home was not starving him of sex. That is the truth.

What do you think a Christian man starved of sex in marriage for a month , two months could do?
He won't get another wife.
He would rather have a side chick. Though it is wrong. And it is a sin. But he won't go and have it with a dog or goat if pressed. He would get a side chick.

Am I in support of side chicks? No!

Don't get me wrong. I am not encouraging anyone to have side chicks. It is a sin. But you should always remember that God is a perfect Judge. He sees the reason of our actions and if the wife is the reason the husband sinned both of them will receive the lash.

Let no woman think its the husband alone that will suffer punishment. Both of them will.

Therefore, if anyone is tired of marriage let him or her come out to say it. Instead of punishing the other with sex and every other rights of marriage.

Seek for divorce and stop pretending.

After all I have said you still believe a woman has right over her body in marriage, and can deny her husband sex when ever and as long as she dims it fit. Then, your have won the argument. You don win!!

Good luck to you and remain blessed.

NoToPile:
Sorry I am not a Muslim but I have cousins who are and we once discussed this issue,he told me categorically ( he's married for 19 years) that marrying a 2nd wife doesn't make economic sense. He started listing school fees he was about to pay that term, he stated his first daughter wants to go to medical college (she's now in medical school) stated a whole lot of things and said it just doesn't make sense.

I laughed so hard basically it means he can't afford having another set of family members and we see some men in the same estate ( its a muslim estate)he lives that can barely feed their first wife marrying extra wives.

He is quite comfortable but he feels having extra family will not make them all comfortable.

His wife said he is not against him marrying another wife as religion permits but where problems will arise is when things need to be paid for he starts telling stories that is where her own wahala will start.
She basically said 'you can't go ahead marrying another wife and start having issues providing for your family'

We all laughed over it that day about 5-6 years back , he's still married to the same woman and his children are doing fine.

Before you marry another wife think about it - can you afford it?

Righteousness89:


Sir/Ma, I have Carefully noticed you on this Noble platform. I must say, Your Challenges are Spirtually Modulated and Orchestrated . But in The Name of JESUS, I Break the yoke! I Command Great Deliverance on you in the Name of JESUS..

I am Praying for you! Don't worry, you will be Fine.

Ishilove:
Women, guard your homes diligently.

yettymuse:
His sexual needs may be more than the bills he pays.
Does he take care of his woman’s needs?? Is she still working?? Does he spoil her? Is she COMFORTABLE??

You think it’s easy to take care of 2kids and a Bigger Baby! Y’all cut these women some slacks!

You think it’s just to pay bills? In this age, lots of women can conveniently pay bills too...

If you don’t Moisturize a woman’s libido with good money, care and attention...she goes completely dry!

This is why I don’t find marriage interesting..especially in this part of the world.. plenty stress, no benefits no bag!
... all you got is a miserly MRS title that can’t even open doors! Taaaaaaaah! with a mad society expecting so much from you!

Unromantic Nigerian Men! Mtchewwww!!!

WILLuKPquiet:
First of all I never advised anyone to have side chicks. I want you to get straight. All I was saying is if the man eventually sin, which is possible except you are being hypocritical.
Giving your husband the chance to have sex with you once a month or once in two months could lead the man to sin. Or you want to pretend you don't know that?

No one is an Angel. And even Angels are not perfect only God is.

How do you explain that? Sex once a montn in marriage because the wife doesn't feel like or the husband doesn't feel like it. Is it not madness??

Let tell you a true story of a welder man. The man is late now.
The wife denied him sex for more than five months and when the man was telling a friend about it, he bursted into tears. A grownup man shedding tears. You could imaging the emotional stress the man had gone through before crying like a baby.

You are here speaking grammar and condemning what I said. Is it not better for the woman to endure sex that to endure divorce?
Yes I mentioned log of wood and I meant it. Let are lie down like a log of wood if she is mentally inbalace yo have sex.

Many of you don't even know that such acts could be as a result of an underlying sickness. If it is, then let her seek medical advice instead of tormenting the life of her husband .

If I were a woman and I claim I love my husband, I would rather endure sex rather than allow it to push him into having a side chick or visit Ashawo joints. Which will eventually lead to divorce one day.

Another example. I have a close moslem friend, Our offices were in the same premise. We used to discuss and tell each other some personal issues. He used to tell me how the wife used to deny him of sex for weeks.
Now, it happened that we both left the area and its been more than two years. Recently months back, we were chatting on WhatsApp' and he just sent a picture of a pretty woman I know and he asked, "do you remember this face?" I said "yes how would I forget the face so soon". This was a girl in the same premise where our offices were working as a secretary for a man. The lady is a Muslim. And an extremely beautiful girl. Then, gbam! My friend said,

She's now my wife"

"How come?" i asked. He said he was serious thst he now has two wives.

My point is, despite the fact that the religion of my friend supports more than one wife, he would not have married another woman if the one at home was not starving him of sex. That is the truth.

What do you think a Christian man starved of sex in marriage for a month , two months would do?
He would not get another wife.
He would rather have a side chick. Or start the act of masturbation.

Yes! though it is wrong. And it is a sin. But he won't go and have it with a dog or goat if pressed. It must be with a human and so far the human at home is sick and tired of sex, he would get a side chick.

Am I in support of side chicks? No!

Don't get me wrong. I am not encouraging anyone to have side chicks. It is a sin. But you should always remember that God is a perfect Judge. He sees the reason of our actions and if the wife is the reason the husband sinned both of them will receive the lash.

Let no woman think its the husband alone that will suffer punishment. Both of them will.

Therefore, if anyone is tired of marriage let him or her come out to say it. Instead of punishing the other with sex and every other rights of marriage.

Seek for divorce and stop pretending.

To cap it all a junior colleague having such problems in his marriage weeks ago said one morning he called his wife and asked her "dear is it right for me as a married man to still be engaging in masturbation? Because that is what I resolves into when ever you say No!"
He said that morning, the wife allowed him.

Well,
After all I have said you still believe a woman has right over her body in marriage, and can deny her husband sex when ever and as long as she dims it fit. Then, your have won the argument. You don win!!

Good luck to you and remain blessed.

krushdripper:
Please don't waste your time speaking wisdom, knowledge or sense to that moniker 'sixfeetbelle' more like 'sixfeetburied', she'll thwat common sense & speak stupidity just to be against men. I'm certain there's something gravely wrong with here upstairs just like with a whole lot of these black myopic girls. save yourself stress & time.

Sixfeetbelle:
You have spoken well and I get where you're coming from, but I need you to take note of these responses to the points you raised

If I were a woman and I claim I love my husband, I would rather endure sex rather than allow push him into having a side chick of visiting Ashawo joints. Which will eventually lead to divorce one day.

You can't endure what you don't enjoy. You need to understand this simple line. Sex is meant to be enjoyed. Doing it because the other party needs it is just to fulfill all righteousness. How long do you think a woman can continue like that?

It could be as a result of an underlying sickness. If it is let her seek medical advice instead of tormenting the life of her husband now.

This is what some women (and some men) don't know about. Once it isn't working like it's supposed to, they start to manage it until it breaks down completely. Most couples manage sex which shouldn't be so. Some are sexually incompatible but men hardly take notice of it cause they can Cum no matter which hole they stick it in.

What do you think a Christian man starved of sex in marriage for a month , two months could do?

How many of these men seek counsel for their problems? How many have told you specifically that they talked to God firsr before getting the approval to venture outside? As a Christian, what should have been the first step a man in this situation takes? But Christians are their own gods, used to taking matters into their own hands (aka side chics).

Is it not better for the woman to endure sex that to endure divorce?

Trust me. When you meet people who have never had a single cum in their life, you'd know that divorce, in this case, is far better than enduring painful sex. Let me ask you this question: If your preeq doesn't ever stand up during sex, like ever, which means you have never ejaculated, will you continue to have sex? That's how it is for some of these women.

After all I have said, do you still believe a woman has right over her body in marriage?

Everyone has a right to their body, the husband included. Otherwise, why are married men having side chics like no tomorrow? If it belonged to their wife, they wouldn't be rubbishing it like this. A woman has a right to her body and should decide if she's in the mood for sex or not. Asides that, if the man takes it by force, he's committing rape. It's that simple.


Summary: Sexual wahala in marriages can be dealt with if the couples communicate better. Most men don't know how to make only the woman cum during sex cause for them, every sex done must involve them ejaculating inside the woman. Some women don't even know they have a center of gravity that is the control center for their cum, and sometimes when they try to direct hubby on what to do to help the ministry, he gets offended since he believes he has more than enough knowledge for both of them.


My take on this issue. Everybody should go ahead and do what he decides. I ain't advising anymore.

WILLuKPquiet:


You, Ogun and your family all together are mad.

I can't be touched by the foolish god your serve.

I am above that.
Get that into your demon invested skull.

I am a Christian like Righteousness89

He uses Proverbs 26:4
He can keep quiet when fools like you insult him.

I use Proverbs 26:5 .
I will give it to you like you need it to torment the Devils living in your head.

You are Mad

mattfeuter:
Foolish bastard , shopona and ogun will consume you and your fucking generations. Ashiere