₦airaland Forum

meobizy:
Lagos is an overrated pigsty. OP, stop eating tuwo. If you switch to pounded yam, eba and fufu maybe then you’ll get as “muscular” as these people you speak of. Jos is part of the middle belt. It is only ignorant Nigerians, the type you find in Nairaland, who consider it the north.

Sulawesi:
Lagos is the earthly paradise of Chancers

That is why Tinubu and his head-slaves have been able to lock down the state's treasury for their own private use for the past 22 years

Peppysco:
[s]One unfortunate idiot must derail the thread, and it had to be you[/s]

Ishilove:
Hello sonofjos, thank you for sharing.

People like us who were born and raised here notice a marked difference in the tempo of activities in other areas of the country. I was in Ondo for a year and I almost ran mad there because life in that state is so... sleepy. Everyone was just moving like geriatric patients, unlike Lagos here where if you are too slow, you will be shoved aside. Last last when it was time to leave, I packed my travelling bags and two mighty Ghana-must-go bags and fled the place by 6am.

Lagos is a melting pot of different ethnic groups with different characters, both saintly and shady, so overtime it developed a character unique to it. We talk angrily a lot of the times because there is someone somewhere always trying to provoke you, cheat you, or steal from you so we are always on guard and on the defensive. Someone tried to pick my bag last year but the kind of eye I gave him must have turned his ancestors in their graves.

Add the congested roads and the traffic and you cannot be calm even if you try to. You will be angry for no reason. Yoruba people call it 'kan ra'. Pepper body. That is why danfo drivers behave like animals because one cannot sit inside hold up day in day out, inhaling noxious exhaust fumes, avoiding police, LASTMA, NURTW agbero, taskforce, police, VIO, those new ones wearing green uniform (I don't know these ones. There are so many uniforms in Lagos) and still be completely sane.

Conductors and passengers fighting is a normal thing. One day I was returning from work and saw two fighting in the middle of the road, and what amazed me was they were sparring like professional boxers, complete with the boxer's stance and leg work. iKid you not. Conductor and passenger. It was the agberos, funny enough, who came to chase them from the road because they were constituting nuisance to other road users. The kid you described did not have any super powers. He was just acting like the typical Lagosian who has been conditioned to act out in the face of provocation. Eat or be eaten. Some of these conductors are very rude and nasty (I suspect it is their own defence mechanism) while some passengers on the other hand are idiots.

The trader in Computer Village was not 'threatening' you. They are simply aggressive marketers. If you don't aggressively market your products you won't make any sales because there a 1001 traders selling the same thing as you. The secret to walking successfully through the Village is rearranging your face to look like granite, avoiding eye contact with anyone and stubbornly ignoring 'threatening'' calls. They cannot hijack you from the road into their shop, abi? Develop military mind!

The same military mind my friend Sanchez01 took to Enugu when he went on a visit. He wanted to board a bus and used ishon (muscle) to run pell mell to where the bus was parked waiting for him. When he jumped in with the skill of a James Bond stuntsman, he met the driver and passengers staring at him strangely.

The driver asked him: "Oga, are you from Lagos?", to which he replied in the affirmative. The driver then remarked "No wonder. It is only Lagos people that behave like they are fighting with everyone."

Wow... just wow.
You absolutely nailed it.
You have a good sense of humor. I love your write-up

Mulatta:
Ikorodu in Lagos is another different story

sonofjos:
Dear lagosians,

Please pardon the grammatic errors.

Being born and bred in the north, I am conditioned to a certain societal behaviour that the first time I went to Lagos, interacting and seeing the people was a bit of a cultural shock to me. I've travelled to many states in the North and few in the south and almost all seemed just about the same as home.

But the first time I visited Lagos a few years ago I had many experiences that made it seem as if was in another country entirely. I'll share a few notable ones.

Please note that I'm not looking for trouble, I'm just giving a honest opinion

It was as if everyone seemd to converse harshly over very simple transactions. One would think they know each other from somewhere.
Many people in the public seemed angry as a default mode. I wondered why.

I boarded a bus to computer village and a primary school kid later joined and was later exchanging very hot words with the conductor who was a very muscular guy over some trivial amount. I watched with interest and it got to a point where I feared for the little guy because If that conductor decided to as much as slap the small boy, there won't be much left. But somehow the conductor calmed down as if he had met a worthy opponent. That boy seemed to me as if he had super powers.

I joined another bus and a fight broke out between the conductor and a passenger. Both of whom were muscular. None would hear sorry. The fight got so bad that the both ended with broken faces and the passenger got a rock and shattered off both side mirrors of the bus. Since I intended to join night bus home, I kukuma dropped and joined okada (it was legal then) which was much more expensive but worth it. I don't know how they ended.

I noticed many young people are muscular body builders. I wonder why.

I was walking on a street at computer village and a guy started threatening and commanding me to come over. At first, I thought he was speaking to someone else when I realised there was no one around me, and he made it clear he was referring to me. Till today, I don't know what confidence made me to keep walking. That was how I escaped O.

Everyone seems to be in hell of a rush.
I even said that if rapture takes place, Lagos would not know anything had happened for two weeks.

But Behind all these seemingly negative atmosphere, I discovered that lagosians are very kind people. Always willing to help.
As a stranger, I found it difficult to find places and routes. But almost anyone you ask is very willing to show you directions. I've had instances where people left their comfort to walk me to places where they gave me directions. Very welcoming set of people to strangers I tell you.

All these mixed experiences made me say that Lagosians are Indeed a very strange people.

Many other things I've experienced at Lagos over my other subsequent visits, but Lagos has remained strange to me.

I mean no disrespect to anyone, I'm just a fellow countryman who wants to better know my country.

My question to you guys is, why is Lagos the way it is?

Is there anything I missed or misunderstood about Lagos?

Thanks

trevorhorace:
Whenever I get to computer village, I dunno I the being I morph into. All I do know is I'm not myself anymore. All my senses are at their peaks. Laser targeted vision, optimum olfactory lobes- , ruler standard straight face. I could hear someone fart from the top of a high-rise building 10 miles ahead. And the alertness of an Israeli trained soldier.

kalvoken:
You dey craze for saying that I'm mad.

Ooni Ku re!

� � � �

Na play o

Sanchez01:
I can't believe you still remember the gist! It was an embarrassing moment, I won't lie.

And your submission is spot on. Everyone is always angry in Lagos; too busy and always in a haste. A typical Lagosian will struggle for the first few months should they find themselves in a serene, quiet state.

Lagos is a jungle, walahi!

udemzyudex:
You will see a tight corner, you probably waited for person 1,2,3 to pass before you move, the 4 person coming saw that you've already waited for the 3 people to pass instead of him/her to wait for you too to pass he/she will quickly try to pass who be mugu naa, we go rough am for that small space since you're you can't have patience then we die here, if na gutter we go enter oo or we go scatter person market so be it.

OP this is lagos where if you're patient, the other person will take you as a muntula, if you're slow the other person will shove you aside, if you're calm while explaining in an argument, the other person will see that as a weakness and capitalise on it.

This is lagos, you don't have to slack at all.

Peppysco:
One unfortunate idiot must derail the thread, and it had to be you

izzou:
[color=royalblue]I went to the bank yesterday. The queue was a bit long. The lady in my front was about to pass through the door when the guy behind me started shouting

Oga, make Una two enter. Two-two abeg

Before I could tell him to be patient, he had jumped the queue and entered with the Lady.

I just tire [/color]

LMS1:
Op the part of Lagos you arrived was the fair part.
you know mushin?
you know orile?
you know badagary?
you know CMS area?
you know ojuelebga?
you know ikorodu? OP NOR START ABEG!

udemzyudex:
You will see a tight corner, you probably waited for person 1,2,3 to pass before you move, the 4 person coming saw that you've already waited for the 3 people to pass instead of him/her to wait for you too to pass he/she will quickly try to pass who be mugu naa, we go rough am for that small space since you're you can't have patience then we die here, if na gutter we go enter oo or we go scatter person market so be it.

OP this is lagos where if you're patient, the other person will take you as a muntula, if you're slow the other person will shove you aside, if you're calm while explaining in an argument, the other person will see that as a weakness and capitalise on it.

This is lagos, you don't have to slack at all.

REALretep:
Wow... just wow.
You absolutely nailed it.
You have a good sense of humor. I love your write-up

Ishilove:
Hello sonofjos, thank you for sharing.

People like us who were born and raised here notice a marked difference in the tempo of activities in other areas of the country. I was in Ondo for a year and I almost ran mad there because life in that state is so... sleepy. Everyone was just moving like geriatric patients, unlike Lagos here where if you are too slow, you will be shoved aside. Last last when it was time to leave, I packed my travelling bags and two mighty Ghana-must-go bags and fled the place by 6am.

Lagos is a melting pot of different ethnic groups with different characters, both saintly and shady, so overtime it developed a character unique to it. We talk angrily a lot of the times because there is someone somewhere always trying to provoke you, cheat you, or steal from you so we are always on guard and on the defensive. Someone tried to pick my bag last year but the kind of eye I gave him must have turned his ancestors in their graves.

Add the congested roads and the traffic and you cannot be calm even if you try to. You will be angry for no reason. Yoruba people call it 'kan ra'. Pepper body. That is why danfo drivers behave like animals because one cannot sit inside hold up day in day out, inhaling noxious exhaust fumes, avoiding police, LASTMA, NURTW agbero, taskforce, police, VIO, those new ones wearing green uniform (I don't know these ones. There are so many uniforms in Lagos) and still be completely sane.

Conductors and passengers fighting is a normal thing. One day I was returning from work and saw two fighting in the middle of the road, and what amazed me was they were sparring like professional boxers, complete with the boxer's stance and leg work. iKid you not. Conductor and passenger. It was the agberos, funny enough, who came to chase them from the road because they were constituting nuisance to other road users. The kid you described did not have any super powers. He was just acting like the typical Lagosian who has been conditioned to act out in the face of provocation. Eat or be eaten. Some of these conductors are very rude and nasty (I suspect it is their own defence mechanism) while some passengers on the other hand are idiots.

The trader in Computer Village was not 'threatening' you. They are simply aggressive marketers. If you don't aggressively market your products you won't make any sales because there a 1001 traders selling the same thing as you. The secret to walking successfully through the Village is rearranging your face to look like granite, avoiding eye contact with anyone and stubbornly ignoring 'threatening'' calls. They cannot hijack you from the road into their shop, abi? Develop military mind!

The same military mind my friend Sanchez01 took to Enugu when he went on a visit. He wanted to board a bus and used ishon (muscle) to run pell mell to where the bus was parked waiting for him. When he jumped in with the skill of a James Bond stuntsman, he met the driver and passengers staring at him strangely.

The driver asked him: "Oga, are you from Lagos?", to which he replied in the affirmative. The driver then remarked "No wonder. It is only Lagos people that behave like they are fighting with everyone."

lorhema:
I actually prefer to be take things easy. I remember one day when I had driven to Ikorodu and was returning home. At a major junction in Yaba, I was waiting for the traffic light when a man standing by the side of the road told me with a smile that I had crossed a line on the road. I knew I hadn't and that if I wasn't careful, I would end my day at the local government office.

I began to shout and challenge him to show me the line. I was hollering, waving my hands and making such a display that the man retreated. As I drove home from that point, I hated what I had just done. It just wasn't me and I felt like I was being sucked into the mess around.

QuietMynd:
Pls, where can I read the gist.
I will like to

dancok:
welcome to ondo,u will like it here,plus you will even live long,don't go back there,life expectancy there is -45/55.

Karleb:
For someone who has not really been to Lagos so many times, whenever I hear in depth stories about that place, I always know that's the place I'm supposed to be.


Life on this side bore me sometimes.

Sanchez01:
I think it was an over-the-phone gist Ishilove and I had a while ago. How she remembered is a mystery.

Ishilove:
The same military mind my friend Sanchez01 took to Enugu when he went on a visit. He wanted to board a bus and used ishon (muscle) to run pell mell to where the bus was parked waiting for him. When he jumped in with the skill of a James Bond stuntsman, he met the driver and passengers staring at him strangely.

The driver asked him: "Oga, are you from Lagos?", to which he replied in the affirmative. The driver then remarked "No wonder. It is only Lagos people that behave like they are fighting with everyone."

DonId:
I spent a great part of my early life in Lagos and got used to the hustle and bustle of life in Lagos. Fast forward to 1998 and I had to go to school in Jos. First few months and I was always angry at the slow pace of life especially with their transporters who would always stop once a passenger says Akwei. I left Jos after university a reformed man and have refused to go back to Lagos (even when work opportunities have presented openings for movement).

Lagos is a “mad” place and shortens peoples life’s (but they don’t know it). Life is not meant to rushing from one place to another every time. I live in a city where I close from work and can be home in 10 minutes without traffic and cannot imagine trading it for 10 minutes inside traffic everyday. Lagosians are wonderful people but life is saner in some other climes. So for those that cannot leave Lagos, I wish you stay out of Lagos for like 2 years and then you will realize that life is meant to lived in peace and not in traffic.

Ishilove:
Hello sonofjos, thank you for sharing.

People like us who were born and raised here notice a marked difference in the tempo of activities in other areas of the country. I was in Ondo for a year and I almost ran mad there because life in that state is so... sleepy. Everyone was just moving like geriatric patients, unlike Lagos here where if you are too slow, you will be shoved aside. Last last when it was time to leave, I packed my travelling bags and two mighty Ghana-must-go bags and fled the place by 6am.

Lagos is a melting pot of different ethnic groups with different characters, both saintly and shady, so overtime it developed a character unique to it. We talk angrily a lot of the times because there is someone somewhere always trying to provoke you, cheat you, or steal from you so we are always on guard and on the defensive. Someone tried to pick my bag last year but the kind of eye I gave him must have turned his ancestors in their graves.

Add the congested roads and the traffic and you cannot be calm even if you try to. You will be angry for no reason. Yoruba people call it 'kan ra'. Pepper body. That is why danfo drivers behave like animals because one cannot sit inside hold up day in day out, inhaling noxious exhaust fumes, avoiding police, LASTMA, NURTW agbero, taskforce, police, VIO, those new ones wearing green uniform (I don't know these ones. There are so many uniforms in Lagos) and still be completely sane.

Conductors and passengers fighting is a normal thing. One day I was returning from work and saw two fighting in the middle of the road, and what amazed me was they were sparring like professional boxers, complete with the boxer's stance and leg work. iKid you not. Conductor and passenger. It was the agberos, funny enough, who came to chase them from the road because they were constituting nuisance to other road users. The kid you described did not have any super powers. He was just acting like the typical Lagosian who has been conditioned to act out in the face of provocation. Eat or be eaten. Some of these conductors are very rude and nasty (I suspect it is their own defence mechanism) while some passengers on the other hand are idiots.

The trader in Computer Village was not 'threatening' you. They are simply aggressive marketers. If you don't aggressively market your products you won't make any sales because there a 1001 traders selling the same thing as you. The secret to walking successfully through the Village is rearranging your face to look like granite, avoiding eye contact with anyone and stubbornly ignoring 'threatening'' calls. They cannot hijack you from the road into their shop, abi? Develop military mind!

The same military mind my friend Sanchez01 took to Enugu when he went on a visit. He wanted to board a bus and used ishon (muscle) to run pell mell to where the bus was parked waiting for him. When he jumped in with the skill of a James Bond stuntsman, he met the driver and passengers staring at him strangely.

The driver asked him: "Oga, are you from Lagos?", to which he replied in the affirmative. The driver then remarked "No wonder. It is only Lagos people that behave like they are fighting with everyone."

Peppysco:
One unfortunate idiot must derail the thread, and it had to be you

Ishilove:
It was over the phone gist na. We had that conversation on a Sunday afternoon, after you had prepared your home made shawarma

Take ginseng for memory boost

DonId:
I spent a great part of my early life in Lagos and got used to the hustle and bustle of life in Lagos. Fast forward to 1998 and I had to go to school in Jos. First few months and I was always angry at the slow pace of life especially with their transporters who would always stop once a passenger says Akwei. I left Jos after university a reformed man and have refused to go back to Lagos (even when work opportunities have presented openings for movement).

Lagos is a “mad” place and shortens peoples life’s (but they don’t know it). Life is not meant to rushing from one place to another every time. I live in a city where I close from work and can be home in 10 minutes without traffic and cannot imagine trading it for 10 minutes inside traffic everyday. Lagosians are wonderful people but life is saner in some other climes. So for those that cannot leave Lagos, I wish you stay out of Lagos for like 2 years and then you will realize that life is meant to lived in peace and not in traffic.

Nicepoker:
you were in ondo due to the tranquility of the environment you almost ran mad. Interesting.

Herbephe1:
Pls don't display your "lagostic attitude" here, he was trying to describe how furious,annoying,and imprudent you Lagosians are,he's not saying you're mentally deranged o...mad has many meanings Sir. little things èpè yii nanni,O wrong nah