₦airaland Forum

This topic interests a lot, but it's the unequal blame that is received from only one party that intrigues me the more. Now, I will not insult rape victims all over the world by making light of their traumas, so I shall exclude them in this. Let's talk consent, right? So, a man and woman come together behind closed doors and amidst smiles and giggles and chuckles and shy stares and selfish compliments, decide to take off their clothes and allow one thing go into the other thing, they shout and moan and make promises and cry and beg and swear and find religion in the process even. Then one of them arrives and instead of parking outside, he decides to park his milk coloured limousine inside the garage. Then they're both breathing and smiling. Bear in mind that in most cases, the woman will not arrive, she's merely a Valet, helping him park well. In other words, the oga most often than not, enjoys the most.

Then they go their separate ways. A month, two months, three months after, she realises that something is going on inside her. She calls oga to tell him but he says he doesn't know what she's talking about and stops picking her calls. She doesn't have a job and lives under someone else's roof, she has sleepless nights as a result of this and depression sets in. She finds oga and pleads with him for help, he gives her money and direction to a clinic where it's done, she goes and does it.

A man sees her at the abortion clinic and spits in disgust, 'women! who will marry this one?' 'tufiakwa! abortion, women are useless!' Meanwhile, he probably parked in someone else's garage the other night but we can't know because they're not built to carry evidence around like women.

When did it become possible that a woman can impregnate herself by herself? How is entirely one person's fault? Pregnant girls are ridiculed, shamed and blamed all the time but the men go unidentified, no one remembers them, they're not held accountable so they carry on with their lives, ensuring that other women get a fair share in the process.

Someone will say- well the women should close their legs, if you're in that category, please sit down and think again, it is okay not to talk sometimes.

This is not me saying that men should be shamed also, no one deserves to be shamed- man or woman. But if you must blame, how about the both parties get equally blamed?

Brining a child you cannot cater for into this world I think is the most wicked act on earth. We should focus on the people who birth ten children and leave them to roam the streets and suffer for no just cause.

Abortion to me isn't just one person's fault, in the case of rape and assault, it is, but like I said earlier, I will not talk about rape here, it is too delicate an issue. So, if you think otherwise, that it is solely a man's or woman's fault, I would really like to here what your reasons are.

Yes, that is what I'm saying. And this doesn't mean that it's the case with every woman. Some women are unsure if they want to keep it or not and s it drags, some try to get help and no one is willing, people only react when they've gone ahead to do what's best for them (abortion). So it would be very careless of anyone to assume that these women are just having fun aborting babies, the psychological trauma that comes with it is terrible and putting them down does nothing but add to the issues. If you can excuse yourself for some things that you do, why not others? Cut others as much slack as you cut yourself, that's all I'm saying.

goodfornothing:
Are you saying some women can actually be pregnant for 3 months without knowing it? No signs, no symptoms?

And they should hold their d*cks also.

Youngpo413:
they should close their legs till their wedding night that all,forget all this story.

No sir. I happen to have read a lot of books and am open minded and considerate. When a situation occurs, step aside and put yourself in the person's shoes or better still in the shoes of a person you love very much and ask yourself if these your opinions will still stand if the tables reversed.

goodfornothing:
Ha! With all this experience and you still want us to believe that no guy has mistakenly put you in the family way. God dey

Are you aware that there are millions of women in the world? With different body types? Are you aware that my aunt found out she was pregnant three months into the pregnancy? Do you know that there are various reasons why a person can resort to abortion? Please read, talk to people, be open minded.

goodfornothing:
Whatever happened to Postinor or other contraceptive pills? Should I say it's an act of stupidity that girls tend to wait until the baby is fully formed before resorting to abortion than do the right things to prevent it? Why wait after 3 months for something you can undo immediately after sex?

I am terribly sorry for you.

Youngpo413:
it doesn't matter for guys.

This post is as ill-informed as I haven't seen my entire life, very insulting also. Have you ever walked in there to find out why these things happen? You'll be surprised at your findings. Are you aware of the rate of child rape in Nigeria? Are you aware of the percentage of older relatives who rape girls on a daily basis in this country? I find it hilarious that you would end your post with 'guys we're not safe', did those girls impregnate themselves? How come they are left out in this post? Because the blame always has to be on the female? Did you know that in 2012, no fewer than 1200 children were raped in rivers state? Also, a cleric that described himself as the Chairman of Bishops in Rivers State, Bishop Nwabueze, has been arrested for allegedly raping a 15- year-old girl and sponsoring the abortion of the baby. How about 90% OF MEN HAVE MADE WOMEN COMMITt ABORTION, that will make for a nice heading, rather than that misogynistic one.

goodfornothing:
This is no joke at all. As long as she's no longer a virgin and up to 20 years of age and with no child, she must have had at least one abortion. Fvck religion and moderate dressing, none of these girls is a saint. Including my sisters. There's an abortion clinic close to where I live. Words can't explain what my eyes have seen. Some are even as young as 15. Guys, we're not safe. And I dare any girl to challenge this!

Are you virgin yourself?

Youngpo413:
You have every right to say No and stick to it,or is really a big deal?I really pity men who marry non virgins,tufiakwa.

It's very easy to sit and judge people when you haven't been in a certain situation. I for one have never been pregnant but that is not the case. Have you considered that some women are slept with against their will? That some were lied to- 'I didn't cum inside'. This is of course not to say that some didn't happen out of carelessness but still. Pregnancy is not a pair of new jeans, even for a married woman, it is a major decision. It changes everything. Do you know how depressing it is to have sex with a man who stands up and walks away while the woman carries evidence of that act for nine months, amidst ridicules and shaming, and no one would even know the man's name?

Saying things like- she spread her legs before the d*ck entered, can't SHE use a condom is the most inhuman thing I have heard in a while. Last time I checked, the most accepted condom is worn by the man. It is either consensual or it is rape. Where it is consensual, they're both in it, together! He probably enjoys it the most, cums inside her and then he refuses to stay and deal with the pregnancy that he was a part of and when abortion happens, it's the woman's fault?

If you're not a woman and have never been pregnant or had to make this massive decision of aborting or not, I say you have little or no opinion. If a woman gets pregnant, it is her body, HER BODY and life. She gets to decide whether or not to keep it. Get off your high horses and stop being holier than all.

Will there be a sequel? I'm interested in knowing the aftermath. But the suspense is exciting, on a second though, leave it at this.

Okay, ATMC this is interesting. Kindness isn't the only reason women fake an orgasm, there's tiredness- when she's tired of the crap you're doing at the top or from behind or from anywhere for that matter. There's boredom- when she's yawning and utterly uninterested+ bobo is doing nothing new, no change of style. There's the okay-I-have-cum-please-stop-hurting-me, when a man thinks that pounding makes her cum and if she doesn't, the pounding continues until something happens, so she screams and wails and acts action porn so you can stop the nonsense.

Then, as for the toes, true that. But that can also be faked and I'm telling you from the experience of a lot of people I know, mine inclusive. Men easily say- I know what she wants, I know how to make her cum, I know when she cuts, I know where and how to touch her. I can guarantee these ones 100%, they know nothing. First of all, sit down and accept that the woman's body is entirely different from yours, accept that you know nothing about it and be open to learn. Most women when it comes to sex are very kind and considerate, so that when a man says- I know how to touch my woman, I make her come all the time, they don't want to oppose this notion, they don't want the man to feel less, so they help him uphold this lie and keep faking the orgasm. This is a very unconscious act, so don't say- why can't she tell him?

Sincerely and without any judgement in your heart, ask your woman what it is you can do to make her cum or at least enjoy the process. If you're truly sincere, you'll be shocked at the feedback. I stress on sincerity because some of the things women want in bed might be embarrassing, some unusual, so in order to open up about them, you must be coming from a place of absolute love and concern. I will give you an instance-

Personally, my major turn on in bed is just hearing my man make silly sounds, moaning and saying things that don't mean anything. When I get the impression that he's entirely into what we're doing and is pleasured solely by me, It's exciting and it's a huge turn on for me. Just listening to him moan while making love to me, will make me cum.

For my friend- she loves it when he kneels down to eat her out. He doesn't know this but sometimes, he unconsciously kneels to do it and for her, kneeling gives her the impression that he adores and worships her, that this, right there is where he'd rather be. Seeing him kneel to eat her out melts her heart and frees her entire body, she's automatically more in-tune to his touch and every other thing he does leaves her vibrating.

For another friend- when he looks her in the eye during the missionary session while squeezing her nipples, she cums, straight away. She feels like she sees through him when this happens.

Another one said she likes the doggy style and she'll cum faster when he talks about her body parts and compliments them. Like- 'oh my goodness babe, I like the way your ***** feels around my ****.

You think you know when she cums? You thought wrong. If a woman wants you to think she cums, you can think it for the rest of your life, meanwhile she didn't cum for one day.

If you care about someone, and you sincerely want them to enjoy the process, it is their body, ask them. Be sincere and let them know that you'll do it, no matter how silly it is. When you've done a good job, you'll know deep down your heart, you won't need to scream it, lol. Learn to worship that body, it's gospel!

Hi y'all,I'm Evanescence. I'm new on here(both NL and this forum as well) I'm not quite familiar with how this works and all but I hope to figure things out with time. I look forward to meeting new and cool people too. That's all for now.

ogugua88: That's why you will remain single and crownless until Dame Patience speaks a non-gbagaunificated sentence.

**Dies**

My vote- Nelly GhenGhen
Xavier
Ekwah
Ijgoz
Laylow

My votes- Nelly Ghenghen!
Xavier
Ekwah
Ijgoz
Laylow

50calibre: EKWAH - the only guy to battle EE+CS and still look cool.

really?

ATMC: smh...this is so uncalled for. Why chicken out #hisses# what d heck is d mara wif yhu?

He didn't o,he's being selfless...check the previous kinikor