₦airaland Forum

@poster

since she is chelsea try call John Terry
i fit get u d fone number

Ujujoan:
Seriously      Oh well, good for ya . .  

What?      

Lexi would never do that . .        

bebe
you knw i won't do dat 2 you
you will always be ma VALENTINO

xynerise:
Go put her face for NTA channel 10 and you go see her tomorrow .

Abekeade08:
Chei Stillwater, you are mean ooh

Daylea, I don feel sorry for you. Oya pick one of my gf's here and I will tell her to come to NL, and yall will take it from there. what do you say??

just in case  
i like to order d one in yellow

Ujujoan:
Lol   Aint you sweet?    

I'm kind of tempted dou, seeing as Lexi has refused to make a concrete offer.      

don worry even if he makes a CEMENT offer i will paint over it

Abekeade08:
r231, Whitelexi and Uju are now a Val couple, maybe you can lure her away by doubling whatever Whitelexi is offering

i am not even going for double I will tripple

@uju

so you just going to leave me hanging on valentine's day and run off with LEXI huh
I am protesting  

want some too

you can answer or you can make your any which way to keep it flowing

Men have always accused their wives of stealing their money. However, women are also of the opinion that some men steal from their wives.

Can you steal your wife’s money?

A married was having an affair with his secretary. One day, their passions over-came them and they took off for her house, where they made passionate love all afternoon. Exhausted from the wild sex, they fell asleep, awakening around eight PM.
As the man threw on his clothes, he told the woman to take his shoes outside and rub them through the grass and dirt. Mystified, she nonetheless complied. He slipped into his shoes and drove home. "Where have you been?!" Demanded his wife when he entered the house. The man was suddenly struck with remorse at the way he had betrayed this woman he loved. "Darling, I can't lie to you. I've been having an affair with my secretary; and we've been having sex all afternoon. I fell asleep and didn't wake up until eight o'clock." The wife looked devastated, and glanced down at his shoes. "You lying bastard! You've been playing golf!"

THE RULES ARE AS FOLLOWS:

1. You can only say Yes or No!
2. You are NOT ALLOWED to explain ANYTHING unless someone messages you and asks!
3. DO NOT SAY ANYTHING BESIDES YES OR NO!!!



Ever lied to your bf/gf/wife/hubby?
yes

Fallen asleep at work/school?
yes

Done something you told yourself you wouldn't?
yes

Sang in the shower?
yes

Blacked out from drinking?
yes

Liked someone without anyone else knowing about it?
yes


Made out with a complete stranger?
yes

Caught someone cheating on you?
yes

slap or kiss the person above you

Pick a letter, any letter, and string together a sentence using words that ONLY begin with that letter.

The rules are simple, the sentence must make SOME semblance of sense, and the words must be real words, mostly.

OK.

Sadly, someone stole Sid's slick sixty-six Stingray. Since Sunday, some sucker's surely southbound. Some supertrooper somewhere spotting Stingray speeding, should surely stop. Sending said SOB, say, Sing Sing? Sure!

button

Yes I am

happy birthday guys
have a wonderful day

Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital.

Please select from the following options menu:

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn’t matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway.

If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.

If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.

If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our operators are too busy to talk with you.

If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won’t be crazy forever.

If you are blonde, don’t press any buttons, you’ll just mess it up.

happy buffday BEN

It's a Sunday, I'll be in church, winking at those girls in the Choir pew.

hellllllllllll yes
after some long hours of_____________then you both get in d tub with a bottle of wine, candles lite with diff. aromas, a piece of chicken and cool off
very very nice experience

Ashley Cole has just been pulled over by the police for doing 140mph, the officer asked him why he was going so fast.
Cole replied that he had just received a call from his neighour that John Terry's car is packed in front of his house

Tell your friend to watch out

roll her up and SMOKE her

whts dis rubbish biz about

Reporter: How are you feeling Mr. President?

Yar'Adua: I feel like I am still in Saudi Arabia though I am not sure where I am. Ask Turai, she will tell you how I am feeling.

Reporter: Why did you give interview to BBC instead of NTA?

Yar'Adua: My people cannot watch or listen to NTA due to NEPA. But with BBC, everyone will turn on their generators to watch and
listen. Who will burn their diesel to watch NTA. Even Goodluck will not do that.

Reporter: What about your 7 point agenda?

Yar'Adua: Forget about that! That was dead on arrival. It was even OBJ's idea. I have streamlined that into only 1 agenda - 'Hanging on to dear life'.
This will work for every Nigerian. Very simple concept that I learned here in Saudi or Yemen

Reporter: What are you going to do about Jos crisis?

Yar'Adua: Jos? Is that still part of Nigeria? Wallahi, I didn't remember.

Reporter: When are you coming back to Nigeria?

Yar'Adua: Never! I am not coming back but don't tell Turai or Andooakaa(the deceiver). Turai might order these housemaids to switch off my life support. Andooakaa might convince Nigerians that I can rule from heaven (?) and I am just tired of the whole thing.

Reporter: What message do you have for your daughters?

Yar'Adua: Marry only governors. Forget the Muttallab's!

Reporter: What message do you have for Nigerians?

Yar'Adua: Hold on tight! You think the ride has been rough, it is going to get worse from here. I am glad that I am not going to be
part of it. I am enjoying my stay here. My brother, please change that channel for me. I need to watch the next soccer game.

EGYPTIANS are my favourite team. I just love them.

Reporter: Thank you Mr. President.

Yar'Adua: Oh me? I am still the President? Thank you! You better leave before Turai gets back here!

rubbish

hi - low