Thanks Spicy! Can you pls explain your reasoning behind your statement? It will be greatly appreciated.

Thanks Twinkledew. Everything is all by God's Grace.

Well Twinkledew! I say scary thot because I am not used to feeling this way at all. In my past relationships I wouldn’t say I have been heartless but I haven’t been the particularly lovely lovely type of guy. I try to avoid all that because I sometimes really don’t think people know what true love entails including me….

In the past, I have been quite content being in a relationship with no sentiments involved, at the same time enjoying my life. . NOW I FIND MYSELF CARING… and am like, waoohhh this can’t be me…

What makes it even more scary is two very big issues at hand. She’s not Nigerian and a Christian (Not that I have anything against that by the way) and I am a Muslim
I have a big family and I know I would be the first in my family marrying to a non-Nigerian person. I would not hear the last of it am sure, also the issue of religion is another to think seriously about.........

One thing I know for sure though is, I don’t care about the Nationality of who I am with, because I would not compromise my happiness for anyone, not even my family when it comes to marriage. Nobody really should…

In all honesty, I am not sure if I am really in Love but I know I really care for her… Like someone said earlier only time will tell.

It's not over night. Been with her a year now!

True love should have no barrier and should never fade! I believe love should be unconditional when it comes to marriage. When two people love each other for the right reasons and not for things that will age or might go away with time (e.g. money, beauty etc) The love shouldn't fade , because that is what will keep you two going till the end of time... and friendship of course. However, friendship without love is not enough either.

I quite agree to a certain extent, the family and society influences plays a major role in people's decision not to get married to someone of a different race or religion. If the two of you believe in what you are doing and don't really care what others think then it could work. Although it can be quite tough to ignore family and friends because, we all know in our culture when you marry someone you’ve married into that person’s family..........

To be honest, there's a part of me that tells me why should my partner's fate be a deciding factor in marrying her or not...........Just like race or nationality why should that matter as long as there is Love and Understanding.

On the other hand I ask myself why go into something that seems so risky (a lot more is required from both party to keep the marriage) and cloudy from the get go.

It's a very complicated issue because lets think about it. You could marry someone from the same religion, same tribe, same everything but that still doesnt guarantee happiness.

Then again, you could marry a Brazilian, different religion, doesnt speak your native language but you are happy as a couple because there is understanding.......

Yeah I see what you mean. We are privileged over here to have all this available to us without having to spend out of our nose.... I can imagine Niger being a different case, you gots to have plenty kudi for hand to do some of those stuff. So don’t blame some of our brothers. Na condition!!!

So back to my question AM I IN LOVE?

US. Why u ask?

The physical side of our relationship is very very good. However, when the physical aspect is not there we still enjoy what ever it is that we do together. So I would say its a mixture of both. We go out a lot, movies, Ice-skating, dinner, weekend holiday, beach, lounge, hours on the phone etc.....

So it’s not just a matter of me enjoy the sex with her. I enjoy every other aspect of our relationship. Sometimes you are in a relationship where you enjoy the sex but you don't think about your partner all the time.

People this is kinda funny asking this question but I want to hear other people’s opinion on this...

When my girlfriend is not with me I am always thinking about her! When she's with me I never want her to leave. I have never ever felt like this about anyone before. For those that have experienced true love, AM I IN LOVE? (very very scary thot).

Kazey!  I perfectly understand what you are talking about. Just like now I have a girl friend that is a Christian and she has a beautiful personality and very good morals. Personally, I do not have a problem marrying a Christian. As a Muslim, I can’t even remember dating a Muslim myself. I have always dated Christians and never had a problem with it. Like wise my friend in question.

This is where I think the problem lies. A married couple should do things in unison. Imagine on a Sunday morning going to the mosque to worship (By the way, Muslim's also go to the mosque on Sundays, its called ASALATU) and my wife is on her way to the church, surely there will be time I wish she could come with me to the mosque so we could go as a couple and I am sure thoughts of that will go through her mind too. Now imagine where kids are involved, I want my kids to come to the mosque with me and my wife wants the same. Surely we can’t be interchanging every weekend because that would be confusing for the kids (Its just not practical). So what do you do?

I for one would love my kids to practice my religion, which means my future wife Insha Allah (God willing) would go through periods of unhappiness not being able to take her kids to the church on Sundays. On the other hand, we all know kids are more susceptible to follow their mother in the long run, so I might be the one going through spells of unhappiness.

Saint, your example brings back memories of when I was young back home in Niger. My mum would always take us to father Christmas and we would even celebrate Christmas with other members of my mum’s family. My mum was a Christian who converted to Islam when she met my dad. I can tell you guys she is even stronger than my dad in the Islamic religion. Anyway, going back to what I am saying, I don’t think I would be that strict with my children in regards to situations like that (referring to your example). There are some things you can't deprive your children in life………….

Thank you guys for replying.

It's such a sensitive issue and sometimes I ask myself the same question. What if I happen to fall in Love with a Christian, as I am a Muslim? Surely, Love should conquer all things. Another question I ask my self is, what If you marry someone of the same religion and you don’t find the same happiness you found from a partner of a different religion?

I personally think God’s intervention is really required in a situation like this… Just like everything else we do in Life.

May God be with us all.

Hi everyone,

I would like to hear people's opinion on Marrying Outside One's Religion.

I happen to know a friend who’s dating someone he loves and vice-versa. They seem to enjoy each other’s company and find true happiness together. In short, they both have what the other desire. The only problem is that my friend is a Muslim and his Girl is a Catholic Christian.

He isn’t really worried about the early years of their marriage but 5-7yrs into the marriage when kids are grown. He would want his children to practice Islam, but the Girl want the children to practice both and decide latter when they are matured. It is important to also note that, the girl doesn’t mind getting married to him as a Muslim and her as a Christian..

Should he just fashy they girl regardless of the love he has for her or Can they really work out their religious differences.

They both seem happy right now even though they practice different religion, but the problem lies with marriage.

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“What goes up must surely come down” What goes around comes around!!!