BeastOfNoNation:
Hello Nairalanders!!

Recently, I realized that the idea of marriage doesn't excite me AT ALL. This realization came about when I was talking to my older cousin who's sister just recently got engaged. I was very happy to hear the news and we were all celebrating for her and wishing her good things. So while I was hugging her, she looked at me and said "Ejirooo! Very soon we'll be celebrating your own engagement ooo!" So we started laughing and she went to talk to the other cousins and aunties. It now occured to me that she was right. One day I will kuku marry. And the thought of that seriously scares me.

You see, I've had relationships before and I've met some of the nicest Naija guys on the face of the planet BUT I've never imagined myself being married to any of them. I've never even experienced real attraction to any of them

Ironically, I've imagined myself being a mother (I'm very nurturing and maternal by nature) and I think it's part of the problem. I would like to adopt children in the future and I haven't met any Nigerian guy who is okay with that idea. Please let me clarify, I WANT TO HAVE MY OWN CHILDREN but I also want to adopt some so that I can give them a better life. I know that being a single mother carries a stigma in Nigerian society but I like the idea of it personally. Lots of fathers are not even directly involved in the rearing of their child anyway.

My second issue with marriage is the multiple problems that can arise. Domestic abuse, Infidelity, Divorce, etc. It seems like everyday one person is having issues with their marriage and it's making me believe that this marriage thing isn't worth the pain. I don't like wahala in my life. I'm also afraid of those guys that control their women's lives and dominate in every aspect. I understand a male being masculine but I don't want to be regarded as a lesser human being to him. It seems like some guys can't differentiate between a wife and a slave

My third issue is that I just don't really understand the need for marriage. I'm pretty self dependent and I can't imagine living with a man let alone marrying one and taking care of him for the rest of my life. While dating, me and my ex just did our own thing. We both had jobs so I didn't need money (plus I have a father if I really need anything ). Marriage title won't add any benefit to my life so what is the use? When I used to go to my last church, the Pastor will be shaking and shouting and praying that the women in church will find husband. The women will now be jumping and fainting and rolling on the ground. I used to stand there and just look at them because I didn't understand. Is It because of Mrs. title or diamond wedding ring? Monogamous marriage doesn't even seem to work in Africa from what I've seen

I'm definitely going to marry just so that my mother will not shout but it will have to be somebody that does his own thing and isn't looking for the conventional wife. It just seems very inconvenient though.

So my questions are:

1) What is the actual use of Marriage?

2) Do any other females feel this way? (I specifically ask females because I have met males who feel this way but if you are male you can answer too )

3) Is marriage for everybody?

Please respond! thank you!

joborskill:
[s][/s]



Islam will conquer biafra insha allah

Dianashantie:
Yeah

hungryboy:
Chai,

Konji no go kill us for dis Buhari tenure,

See as i rush in as i just hear 'lick my without mercy',


All my thinking be say na pu*ssy licking pics i go see.

Oahray:
Anyway op, an unpopular person is one that is disliked by the majority (not one that is not known by many). Careful with the words you use.

Koddedtinz:
See this hypocrite that came out to talk about his own marriage on social media!

Why didn't he attend to his own privately? Yellowed Baboon