₦airaland Forum

[center]A kid comes home from school with a writing assignment. He asks his father for
help. "Dad, can you tell me the difference between potential and reality?"
His father looks up, thoughtfully, and then says, "I'll demonstrate. Go ask
your mother if she would sleep with Frank Edoho for a million naira. Then
go ask your sister if she would sleep with Scopium for a million naira. Then
come back and tell me what you've learned."

The kid is puzzled, but decides to ask his mother. "Mom, if someone gave you a
million naira, would you sleep with Frank Edoho?"

"Don't tell your father, but yes, I would."

He then goes to his sister's room. "Sis, if someone gave you a million
naira, would you sleep with Scopium?"

She replies, "O my god! Definitely!"

The kid goes back to his father. "Dad, I think I've figured it out.
Potentially, we are sitting on two million bucks, but in reality, we are living
with two sluts."
[/center]

Please can somebody explain to me the meaning of model. From my own understanding this is not a model.

One man's corned beef is another man's cyanide. That's my version of one man's meat is another man's poison. I love my native dishes, Igbo Kwenu! I love Calabar dishes as well. People confess they are the best in Naija, sound like fact. But I hate Yoruba dishes especially AMALA and that green goop they call soup. I've heard a lot of dirt about them maybe that baseless stereotyping affected me badly. On the bright side though I love their language.

Hope they are going to start dressing different mentally.

Have you ever set your alarm clock and when the poor thing does the job of ringing , you do the job of not waking up? Well there's a new breed of alarm clocks that don't joke, they mean business when they want to wake you up. They just shock the hell out of you. Next time when you set an alarm clock be ready to honour the agreement of waking up or else,


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I hate it when walking down the street you see "girls" trying to adjust what they are wearing to cover what have. You wear a mini skirt and when you see me approach you tug on the damn thing to stretch it longer than the lenght, you pull your top to cover your hairy belly button, pull your top up to cover your almost falling out breast, you use a pin as a second button to hold your skimpy shirt so that your bra or breast don't show, you wear a low waist jeans but always pull it up to cover your ass crack such a disgusting sight, you wear a sleeveless top and your armpit is really a harmpit ,, etc. They are just too many. You looked yourself in the mirror and felt very hot, attractive, sweet, irresistibly sexy and what have you in them. How you felt so comfortable and on top of the world. When you get in the public and people start to see your handwork your moral gets stupidly awakened and you try to hide God's handwork. I don't care if you are half naked just be confident in what you decided wear. I appreciate some level of exposure. It keeps the blood pumping properly. Dress good and confident ladies.

[center]Euphemism normally drys the natural juice (bitter or sweet) of any action or expression like the above caption. I meant to say Nigeria Breweries test was totally bleeped without a rubber. Anybody who tested it would probably call this a despicable understatement. Oh wait, this is Niaija Breweries we are talking about here. Well what the LIQOUR do you expect when drunk men and women organize an aptitude test. Obviously the line; 'Drink Responsibly' exist only in the advert world if not, the test would have been very orderly and organized responsibly. Their plan and execution didn't drink responsibly.

The first untimely drunk act was the very unreasonably short notification time. That Heineken guy's email and NBplc text messages arrived rather too late leaving many with no room to plan or prepare. The time on my invitation letter was 12:30am, is that midmorning, midnight or midday? OK I'm just curious was it INEFFICIENCY[/color] or was it an ultimate star ploy to cut down the number of expected invitees? I mean I don't understand. A week's notice is most ideal and not a less than 20 hours notice.

Again time wasn't of any minuscule import to the organizers. There were four sets for the test depending on test time i.e 8:30am, 10:30am, 12:30pm and 2:30pm. By 1:45pm the invitees billed for 10:30am were still being [color=#990000]barbequed unapologetically under the hellish sun in the rubbish name of accreditation. One of my friends got pissed up with the whole thing and abandoned the test. By the time the 10:30am group finshed, a low scale chaos was the religion in practise outside the hall. Getting inside the hall became a survival of the featest thing and no longer based on your test time. So when it was time to get in, we KICKED, PULLED, PUSHED and SQUEEZED our way in nearly suffocated. The hall got filled fast yet a rather large population was left outside. The test started around 3:30pm and over in the next 60 minutes. Don't know when the last batch finished, only God Knows.

The most drunk act was the idea of inviting the whole of the unemployed graduate in Naija for aptitude test in one cubicle or venue. As far as the population of invitees is concerned the venue is a cubicle.
The size of the hall is the least of concerns of the invitees. Can you imagine the stress of planning within such extremely short notice, cost of transportation and the immeasurable RISK of travelling from all parts of Naija. One or two candidates even came from Ghana. Can you IMAGINE THAT! If you put a financial evaluation to the travelling risk believe me it worth more than 50 Nigeria Breweries put together.

A clear headed arrangement should have been to put 6 venues in the 6 geopolitical zones or at the very least if mild push comes to murderous shove 2 venues. Enugu housing the largest factory keeps one then Lagos keeps the other. Their clinical insensitivity to the plight of the invitees is highly commendable in the hottest, deepest and darkest quarters of hell. I know they'll say 'WE DIDN'T FORCE ANYBODY TO COME IF YOU KNEW YOU COULDN'T MAKE IT YOU HAD BETTER STAYED IN YOUR HOUSE'. I must say in my own opinion that THE WHOLE THING WAS HANDLED IN A PROFESSIONALLY UNPROFESSIONAL MANNER.
Maybe I should blame unemployment or something else.

Anyway the only good part was that it took place on a Saturday so some people don't have to invent excuses for their boss or sneak out of their current office because of one aptitude test. Despite all the venom I can't help but pour out here, I'm stuck to my phone and email box waiting to be called for an interview which automatically will turn into a job. Truth be told. Peace out FOLKS. [color=#000099][/color][/center]

Good point @tomX.