₦airaland Forum

DAvIt0: UPDATE UPDATE PLEASE!!! Emotions dividing!!!!!!

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ROTFLOL

I nominate Ishi. But please finish the chronicles na. We will treat your matter oh!

The more you write, the better it gets...! Keep it up.

This is exclusive stuff..!

Lawd! You are a great writer...i dunno but this last episode is one of the best stuff I've read in a while. Thumbs up!

;DBe ashamed that a CRAZEMAN is giving you points on how to be decent. It is a big shame! Abomination..

Nobody is commentin. Na waka pass?

So sorry..my phone wouldn't let me modify.

Efemena_xy: Hi She-blayze and welcome.

Nice stuff you've got up there. My only critism here like Mac mentioned is the use of over dramatic events, like sending Lola back into a coma.

Also, Lola is a gentle character so you might want to modify / take out the explective. I.e the swear word.

Otherwise, well done.

Thanks. Duly noted. I'll take 'em all out bit by bit...smiles'

maclatunji: Welcome newbie, not bad at all. Why you send Lola back to Coma now? We the oldies really need to give this story some more attention. I will "feel it" again soon I hope. I've had so many things to deal with.

You have done well, your errors are pardonable. Fell free to continue the story.

Thanks for the encouragement...

Guyz pls tk it easy on me wit d criticisin, commentin n all. M new on NL. Dis story particularly caught М̣̣̥̇̊Ɣ attention, but it appeared it was going to die...so I did d little I cud do. Thank You.


Plz show d sista sm luv..ℓ☺ℓ

************Hospital**************
Lola woke up with a start. She squinted her eyelids trying to guard her eyes from the blazing early morning sun. The sun was fiery that morning, it was in the dry season of an african continent. What did you expect to find in a country like Nigeria at this time of the year. 'God! She thought, 'I have never up this late before' She closed her eyes back and started planning her schedule for the day. In her mind's eye, she imagined herself doing the normal chores, taking her daughter to school, (though she knew she was already late for school). What normally followed after dropping her baby off in skul?' Yes, she knew there was someplace she usually went thereafter. 'Work!' She gladly remembered. But she was at a crossroad, 'where did she work?'. She felt blank... Then gradually the memories of her going to charge her phone filtered in. However, she debated within herself, 'why would I go and charge my phone in our neighbour's house?' At the moment, Lola could hardly recall much, but there was something she knew that she disliked most...charging phones in a neighbour's house. 'If I had to put down my pride and go charge my phone in our neighbour's house, then it must have been important' she tried to reason. 'What was this important thing?' The hot silent argument ensued steadily, it was like an intellectual battle trying to unravel the unknown. Lola had been in a coma for 7 days. Her mum, dad and even her child knew it was only God that could bring her back. The whole of Amudulun community prayed earnestly for her. They had lost one of their daughters, Shade due to an explosion that rocked Shade's father's gen house, they were not ready to lose Lola to the same explosion. As if from a nightmare, Lola saw the flashes of the explosion happen. As if on cue, she felt a sudden chill when she remembered that her environment was strange, the bed felt different from hers', it was a bit too firm as if it lacked springs. She was lying upright and usually she lay on her tommy with her face turned to the right. The sheets, they felt different too. Soft and silky with the refreshing smoothness about it. 'Did mummy change the sheets without my noticing it?' There was no answer. She flashed back immediately, it had all being white and only beds when she had tried to wake up earlier on. The strange odour was also strong, she sniffed and felt like throwing up. Confusion. Lola was totally confused. She could not fathom her environment. Where was this white place and what was she doing in it? The explosion scene flashed back again, this time clearer and more vivid. 'Oh' she sighed, 'I must have being in that explosion and maybe I'm dead. This must be heaven, its all white and serene' Her mind played more games with her and it reached a climax when she saw Shade's charred body. 'Shadeeee!!!' She screamed out of dreamworld and into reality. Our African sunshine was still there to taunt her sight, 'damn this light!, she shouted in her head, 'I am confused and I need answers!' Apart from the glaring sun, someoneelse was also there to welcome Lola from her coma. Her mum. She had being with Lola these past seven days silently praying for her to regain consciousness. She had drifted asleep this morning, having kept watch throughout the night. Papa Lola and her ran shifts in watching Lola at the hospital. While one stayed with their daughter at the hospital, the other took care of the granddaughter at home. However, Papa Lola was taking too long to come and she had tried continuously to fight the sleep until she could bear it no longer. She thought about the events of the past eight days, the explosion, Shade's death, and Lola's unconsciousness. She wept silently and prayed faithlessly, hoping against hope that God would intervene somehow in her daughter's situation, not forgetting to also thank HIM for the young doctor who was fighting tooth and nail to keep Lola alife. She prayed God would bless him and give him more strength to save more lives. She was concieving the thought of also praying for Lola's daughter, her granddaughter when she drifted off in sleep. The sleep was surprisingly peaceful and soothing until she heard her own Lola's voice screaming Shade's name. She quickly lifted her head up from the bed. While praying, she sat on a stool and had her head bowed on the hospital bed in the female ward where Lola had lain for the past seven days. Getting up quickly she restrained Lola from climbing down the bed, thinking ' eh, why is she now screaming Shade's name' but also overjoyous, 'Doctor! Nurse! Nurse! My daughter is awake' Lola immediately took it in, she was in a hospital! Her mother never reacted so happily to her waking up late. She must had slept for long, maybe a coma. She had lot of questions to ask, it was like a suspense movie. Why was she in a hospital? The doctor rushed into the ward followed by two eager nurses with broad smile on their faces. They were heading straight for her bed. Her mother was singing and dancing like it was a thanksgiving, she was a happy woman, but Lola had never seen her infected with the 'joy virus' 'Doctor', Lola's mother shouted, 'please check my daughter o! She is back!' 'Calm down madam' Lola heard a familiar voice say. She looked closely at the doctor and there he was! The bastard who ruined her life was now a doctor. 'Kingsley' she yelled in anguish and tears. It was too hard for her to take in and process. Too much data, her brain memory chirped in "with the voice of an atm" and she sinked back into oblivion. She went back into her coma...
*******coma continua******