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Computers / How To Hide File In Image by Sholah96(m): 3:30pm On Jul 23, 2014
How Can We Hide The File In Image?
1. Gather the file you wish to bind, and the image file, and place them in a folder. I will be using C:\New Folder
-The image will hereby be referred to in all examples as xyz.jpg
-The file will hereby be referred to in all examples as New Text Document.txt
2. Add the file/files you will be injecting into the image into a WinRar .rar or .zip. From here on this will be referred to as (secret.rar)
3. Open command prompt by going to Start > Run > cmd
4. In Command Prompt, navigate to the folder where your two files are by typing
cd location [ex: cd C:\New Folder]
5. Type [copy /b xyz.jpg + secret.rar xyz.jpg] (remove the brackets)
Congrats, as far as anyone viewing is concerned, this file looks like a JPEG, acts like a JPEG, and is a JPEG, yet it now contains your file.
In order to view/extract your file, there are two options that you can take
a) Change the file extension from xyz.jpg to xyz.rar, then open and your file is there
b) Leave the file extension as is, right click, open with WinRar and your file is there. Enjoy...
Science/Technology / Do Aliens Exist? 5 Signs They Just Might... by Sholah96(m): 7:50pm On Jul 21, 2014
Whether aliens exist or not is a question that everyone has been pondering over for quite a few years now. There are a lot of eminent people who insist that aliens are real and support their claim with a lot of very convincing examples. Aliens visiting the Earth and befriending or destroying mankind has been a topic of many popular science-fiction movies and every time we come out of a movie theater after watching a film that is alien centered we end up asking ourselves 'do aliens exist?', 'are aliens real?'.
Well, films aside, there is now some pretty scientific proof that aliens actually do exist and we might just be visited by our friends from other planets sometime in the future.
5 Convincing Proofs:
1) With numerous stars, alien life is probable: Although there is no direct proof the aliens exist, it is notable that the universe is home to a lot of stars and past research has shown that at least 50% of these stars harbor planets. Scientists have estimated that there are about a trillion planets in the Milky Way alone. It is very much possible that at least some out of these planets have undergone changes like the Earth and developed life.
2) Water occurs on planets other than Earth: Water, as we all know, is very important for life and research has revealed that liquid water is pretty common in our solar system. Scientists have shared evidence of existence of water on Mars. Europe (one of the moons of Jupiter) also seems to have an ocean in liquid form. Evidence of water has also been found on Venus, Titan and Enceladus (Saturn's moons) and Jovian moons Ganymede and Callisto.
3) Life in earth evolved real quickly: Earth's age has often been estimated at about 4.5 billion years. With regards to the earliest evidence for life, it comes from 3.4 billion year old mats of bacteria found in Australia (known as stromatolites). Scientists have time and again insisted that even bacteria are biologically complex and there are good chances that the ones in Australia arose from a life form that landed on Earth even earlier.
4) Life seems to thrive in extreme conditions: Almost everywhere that scientist go on Earth, no matter how deep, dark or extreme the conditions, they end up finding life. Life can exist in the toughest of conditions and there are good chances that the universe is filled with living places that are tough and extreme. Mars is said to have a very harsh environment, but there are some microbes on Earth that can easily survive in places with harsh conditions.
5) Incoming signals: Scientists looking for answers to questions like do aliens exist and are aliens real frequently harness some of the largest radio telescopes in the world to find some signal that aliens might be trying to communicate with us. Some of the evidence has raised alarm, but it has often been dismissed as 'human interference'. The most convincing signal, however, was recorded on August 15, 1977 during a search that was carried at the Big Ear Observatory at the Ohio State University. The signal has never been explained but when recorded, it amazed scientists enough to write 'Wow!' on the printout of the same.
A look at these very convincing proofs would lead us to strongly believe that aliens, in fact, do exist and they are very real. There are always going to be skeptics but more and more scientific evidence is coming in everyday and one day, very soon it seems, when someone asks questions like do aliens exist or are aliens are, there will be a resounding 'yes!'

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Nairaland / General / Re: How To Fart In Public And Retain Your Image by Sholah96(m): 11:01am On Jul 21, 2014
Youngreinhard: You seem like an expert in this business
na advice bro
Nairaland / General / How To Fart In Public And Retain Your Image by Sholah96(m): 10:47am On Jul 21, 2014
To mess for public dey sweet but if dem catch u, no be small embarasment o! Just follow dis guidelines & u are on ur way to being a star in dis profession.
1. Wen u enter a hall, check d wind direction, if na closed hall wit AC, better. Maximum impact.
2. Make sure say u sidon face d wind direction. …
3. Make sure say u get enof leg space. U go soon knw why.
4. Form ajebo by crossin ur legs every now & then.
5. U don ready 2 execute, try hold am until time wey d hall dey noisy incase ur mess na d type wey dey sound like AK47.
6. Now carefuly cross ur leg, right over left.
7. Elevate d right yansh.
8. Release small (sound check)
9. If no sound, allow make d mess flow steady.
10. Allow time 4 proper circulation.
NOTE:
1. Make sure say no be u be d first person 2 complain.
2. Wen pple begin dey shout “chineke! E no go better for d person wey do dis kind thin, ” simply ask “why person no fit respect d presence of odas na?”
3. No hala pass odas if not u go become suspect.
4. Take style disengage from the area, relocate to another zone and repeat the exercise!

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Celebrities / Davido Says He Is Not A Graduate Yet by Sholah96(m): 10:12am On Jul 21, 2014
Davido denies <p>graduating from Babcock UniversityBy Omotola Filanion July 21, 2014</p>@dailypostngr
Pin It
Artiste Davido made headlines months ago for reportedly graduating from Babcock university and causing a commotion at the event during his arrival.
According to reports, the ‘Skelewu’ crooner was one of the over 500 graduands at the Babcock University, and his billionaire dad, Chief Adeleke was at the ceremony to witness the occasion.
After having kept mute on the reports for months, Davido took to his twitter page some minutes ago to react.
“I attended a friend’s graduation and the next thing I hear is I graduated without doing any exam! So stupid!!!One more year and yes I’ll be a graduate! So stick that up your ass! Haters! But really who said I graduated So stupid gossip,” he tweeted
Jokes Etc / Welcome To Nigeria by Sholah96(m): 11:56pm On Jul 20, 2014
WELCOME TO NIGERIA:
®Where sex is free and love is costly.
®Where loosing a phone is more
painful than loosing VIRGINITY...
®Where, if u don't cheat on your
partner, u are not sharp and smart.
®Where Bathrooms has become photo STUDIO...
®Where getting a GALAXY phone is greater than achieving a DEGREE...
®Where yahoo boys have brighter future than graduates...
®Where temples are turned into dating points,
®Where worshiping God in truth & spirit
is difficult.
®Where lies are turned into realities...
®Where ladies fear Pregnancy than HIV...
®Where pizza delivery is faster than emergency
response
®Where people fear thieves, robbers & Boko Haram than God...
®Where people go to church with BB chargers rather than BB(BiBle).
®Where guys are scared of getting married but love to have sex...
®Where we have highest number
of musician due to unemployment.
®Where the higher your offense the lower ur punishment and
vice versa...
®Where the number of churches & mosque are more than the worshipers.. ®Where we say Up NEPA more than we say Praise THE LORD... ®Where a school drop-out politician is Ten time richer and more respected than a professor... ®where someone who cannot speak English but can say Chai, Chai deris God is given honorary Doctorate degrees...
WHAT A COUNTRY!!
Science/Technology / Re: Time Travel : Real Or Fictional .. .?(how Possible) ? by Sholah96(m): 3:49pm On Jul 20, 2014
Check dis out

Science/Technology / Re: Time Travel : Real Or Fictional .. .?(how Possible) ? by Sholah96(m): 11:34am On Jul 20, 2014
ERTHAENIGMA:
then it's safe to assume that we are in relative motion with other parts of the universe and if paradventure,time travel is made possible. There is a high probability that we would appear where we want to without the place moving out of place. All our movements are in sync with each other. From living things,to non-living things,to extra-terrestrial bodies
LOL

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Nairaland / General / Re: 25 Of The Most Evil Serial Killers You Have Ever Known. Are They Mad? (1) by Sholah96(m): 10:31am On Jul 20, 2014
Is killing fun for these ones?
Science/Technology / Re: Time Travel : Real Or Fictional .. .?(how Possible) ? by Sholah96(m): 10:22am On Jul 20, 2014
Wikipedia cited a Quranic example where some people went to sleep/rest in the cave, only to woke 300 years after.
Nairaland / General / 25 Of The Most Evil Serial Killers You Have Ever Known. Are They Mad? (1) by Sholah96(m): 10:03am On Jul 20, 2014
25.
David Berkowitz
davidberkowitz.wikispaces.com
Known as the Son of Sam or the .44 Caliber Killer, David Berkowitz carried out a series of shootings in the summer of 1976. Using a .44 calibre Bulldog revolver, he shot 6 people dead and wounded 7 others. Berkowitz sent a series of taunting letters to police and the press promising further shootings, terrorising the people of New York City. Eventually captured in August 1977, Berkowitz confessed to all of the killings and was sentenced to 25 years to life in prison for each murder, to be served consecutively and is unlikely ever to be released.
24.
Edmund Kemper
themind ofaserialkiller.tumblr.com
Known as “The Co-ed Killer”, Edmund Kemper is an American serial killer and necrophile who carried out a series of brutal murders in California in the 1970s. He murdered his grandparents when he was 15 years old then later killed and dismembered 6 female hitchhikers in the Santa Cruz area. He then murdered his mother and one of her friends before turning himself in to police days later. He was found guilty in November 1973 of 8 counts of murder. He asked for the death penalty, but instead received life imprisonment without the possibility of parole.
23.
Larry Bittaker and Roy Norris
thenewstalkers.com
Lawrence Bittaker and Roy Norris, nicknamed ‘The Tool Box Killers’ are two American serial killers who together murdered 5 young women in California in 1979. Luring victims into their van and driving them to secluded areas where they both raped and tortured them horrifically with a number of tools before murdering them. In 1981 Bittaker and Norris were charged with murder, kidnapping and rape. Bittaker was sentenced to death and remains on death row to this day.[update] Norris was spared execution in return for his testimony against Bittaker and sentenced to 45 years in prison.
22.
Ian Brady and Myra Hindley
wikipedia
Ian Brady and Myra Hindley killed 5 children between 1963 and 1965, in Greater Manchester, England. Aged between 10 and 17 years old, their victims were sexually assaulted before being brutally murdered. Three of the victims were discovered in graves dug on Saddleworth Moor and the last victims body found at Brady’s house, the whereabouts of the fourth victim, Keith Bennett remains unknown. Both Brady and Hindley were later sentenced to life imprisonment. Hindley dying in prison in 2002. Brady has since been confined in the maximum security Ashworth Hospital where he remains on hunger strike to this day.
21.
Kenneth Bianchi and Angelo Buono (The Hillside Stranglers)
murderpedia.org
Between late 1977 to early 1978 cousins Kenneth Bianchi and Angelo Buono carried out a reign of terror in California, kidnapping, raping and killing 10 girls aged between 12 and 28 years old, strangling each victim in the hills above Los Angeles which led to them being known as ‘the Hillside Stranglers’. Bianchi attempted to plead not guilty by way of insanity but was found to be faking mental illness, so instead agreed to plead guilty and testify against Buono. Both were sentenced to life imprisonment. Buono died of a heart attack in his cell in 2002.
20.
Dennis Rader (the BTK Killer)
soletron.com
Dennis Raider murdered 10 people in Sedgwick County, Wichita, Kansas between 1974 and 1991. Obsessed with notoriety, Raider sent taunting letters to police under the name BTK which stood for ‘Bind, Torture, Kill’. Rader stalked his victims before breaking into their homes, then binded their limbs before strangling them. Having disappeared in 1988, BTK remerged 2005 when he sent a floppy disc to the press which was to be his downfall. Tracing him via the floppy disc, Rader was arrested and charged upon which he immediately confessed. He is serving 10 consecutive life sentences with an earliest possible release date of February 26, 2180.
19.
Donald Henry Gaskins
murderpedia.org
In 1969, Gaskins began killing a series of hitchhikers he picked up while driving around the coastal highways of the American South, torturing and mutilating his victims. He claimed to have killed eighty to ninety people. He was arrested in 1975, when a criminal associate confessed to police that he had witnessed Gaskins killing two young men. He was convicted of 8 murders and was sentenced to death which was later commuted to life imprisonment without parole. Remarkably Gaskins went on to commit a further murder within the high security prison, killing a fellow inmate. He is the only man to have ever killed an inmate on death row
Science/Technology / Re: Time Travel : Real Or Fictional .. .?(how Possible) ? by Sholah96(m): 9:56am On Jul 20, 2014
An example in Quran: some people went to sleep/rest in the cave, only to woke 300+ years after. Their figures neva change. What happened?
My bros, this thing is possible...
Jokes Etc / Re: Puzzle by Sholah96(m): 12:53pm On Jul 16, 2014
Only STRAUSS could match these criteria, whereas, it's nt an english word
Nairaland / General / Re: ....and I Threw Away The Suya! by Sholah96(m): 11:42pm On Jul 15, 2014
delishpot:


God bless you. Lmfao



@ OP, you did not touch the blood kwo? Ok.
Its good you throway am. I know you wasted 500 bucks. Next time tell am say you no fit chop that meat say you go pay half cos of im wound but you nor fit buy the suya again. If him bring dagger out, pay twice the price and run.
Religion / . by Sholah96(m): 10:27pm On Jul 15, 2014
This post has been deleted
Jokes Etc / See Gobe!!! by Sholah96(m): 2:50pm On Jul 15, 2014
A man needed a horse, so he went to a temple and got one. Before he left, the priest told him that it was a special horse. In order to make the horse go, you say, "Thank God," and for it to stop you say, "Amen." So the man left, and a few minutes later he dozed off on his horse. Hours later, he woke up and his horse was racing him towards the edge of a cliff. Just in time, he shouted "Amen!" and the horse stopped a few inches from the edge. "Whew," said the man, "thank God!"
Nairaland / General / Nyako, Adamawa Governor Impeached by Sholah96(m): 2:40pm On Jul 15, 2014
The Adamawa State Governor, Murtala Nyako has been removed from office. He was impeached on Tuesday afternoon after the House considered the report of a 7-man panel constituted to investigate charges of financial impropriety against him and his deputy, Bala Ngilari.
The Deputy Governor however turned in his resignation just before the impeachment. His resignation was read at the plenary session of the Adamawa State House of Assembly by the Speaker, Umaru Fintiri and it was subsequently approved by the House.
The assembly on Tuesday commenced sitting to consider the report of the panel which was submitted amidst tight security on Monday evening.
As of the time of filing the report, the assembly complex had heavy security presence
Science/Technology / Re: 25 Most Notorious Hacker To Ever Get Caught by Sholah96(m): 6:22pm On Jul 12, 2014
I just wanna be a hacker, no more no less
Jokes Etc / Re: Jokes FM by Sholah96(m): 6:18pm On Jul 12, 2014
These editors bad o, i posted pen*s, they changed it into *joystick*. Well, it's gud sha
Jokes Etc / Jokes FM by Sholah96(m): 6:00am On Jul 12, 2014
A man is fishing and he catches a crocodile. The crocodile tells him, "Please let me go! I'll grant you any wish you desire." The man says, "Okay, I wish my penis could touch the ground." The crocodile then bites his legs off.
Education / Re: Why Study Electrical Engineering? by Sholah96(m): 3:17pm On Jul 11, 2014
I'm proud to be an EEE student. I'm needed by the world
Nairaland / General / Phobias, Choose Urs(2) by Sholah96(m): 12:27pm On Jul 11, 2014
M
*. Mastigophobia, poinephobia – fear of punishment
*. Melanophobia– fear of the color black
*. Melissophobia– fear of bees
*. Melophobia– fear of music
*. Monophobia– fear of being alone or isolatedor of one's self
*. Musophobia, murophobia, suriphobia – fear of miceand/or rats
*. Myrmecophobia– fear of ants
*. Mysophobia– fear of germs, contaminationor dirt
N
*. Necrophobia– fear of deathand/or the dead
*. Neophobia, cainophobia, cainotophobia, centophobia, kainolophobia, kainophobia – fear of newness, novelty
*. Nephophobia– fear of clouds
*. Nomophobia– fear of being out of mobile phonecontact
*. Nosocomephobia– fear of hospitals
*. Nosophobia– fear of contracting a disease
*. Nyctophobia, achluophobia, lygophobia, scotophobia – fear of darkness
O
*. Obesophobia– fear of obesity
*. Oikophobia– fear of home surroundings and household appliances
*. Ombrophobia– fear of rain
*. Omphalophobia– fear of navels
*. Ophthalmophobia– fear of being stared at
*. Osmophobia, olfactophobia – fear of odors
P
*. Panphobia– fear of everythingor constant fear of an unknown cause
*. Papaphobia– fear of the Pope
*. Papyrophobia– fear of papers
*. Pediophobia– fear of dolls(a branch of automatonophobia: fear of humanoid figures)
*. Phagophobia– fear of swallowing
*. Pharmacophobia– fear of medications
*. Phasmophobia– fear of ghosts or phantoms
*. Philophobia– fear of love
*. Phobophobia- fear of fear itself or of having a phobia
*. Phonophobia– fear of loud sounds or voices
*. Pogonophobia– fear of beards
*. Porphyrophobia– fear of the color purple
*. Pyrophobia– fear of fire
R
*. Radiophobia– fear of radioactivityor X-rays
S
*. Scolionophobia– fear of school
*. Scopophobia– fear of being looked at or stared at
*. Selenophobia– fear of the moon
*. Sesquipedalophobia– fear of long words – a branch of logophobia
*. Sociophobia– fear of people or social situations
*. Sophophobia– fear of learning
*. Spectrophobia– fear of mirrors
*. Stygiophobia– fear of Hell
T
*. Taphophobia, taphephobia – fear of the grave, or fear of being placed in a grave while still alive
*. Technophobia– fear of technology
*. Telephone phobia– fear or reluctance of making or taking telephone calls
*. Tetraphobia– fear of the number 4
*. Thalassophobia– fear of the sea, or fear of being in the ocean
*. Thanatophobia– fear of dying
*. Thermophobia– fear of heat
*. Tokophobia– fear of childbirthor pregnancy
*. Toxiphobia– fear of being poisoned
*. Traumatophobia– a synonym for injury phobia: fear of having an injury
*. Triskaidekaphobia, terdekaphobia – fear of the number 13
*. Trypanophobia, belonephobia, enetophobia – fear of needles or injections
*. Trypophobia– fear of holes or textures with a pattern of holes
*.Turophobia – fear of cheese
U
*. Uranophobia, ouranophobia – fear of Heaven
W
*. Workplace phobia– fear of the workplace
X
*. Xanthophobia– fear of the color yellow
*. Xenophobia– fear of strangers, foreigners, or aliens
*. Xylophobia, hylophobia, ylophobia – fear of trees, forests or wood
Nairaland / General / Phobias, Choose Urs(1) by Sholah96(m): 12:21pm On Jul 11, 2014
*Ablutophobia– fear of bathing, washing, or cleaning
*. Acousticophobia– fear of noise – a branch of phonophobia
*. Acrophobia– fear of heights
*. Agoraphobia– fear of helplessness and of leaving safe places
*. Agraphobia– fear of sexual abuse
*. Agrizoophobia– fear of wild animals, a branch of zoophobia
*. Agyrophobia– fear of crossing the road
*. Aichmophobia– fear of sharp or pointed objects (such as a needleor knife)
*. Ailurophobia– fear of cats
*. Algophobia– fear of pain
*. Amychophobia– fear of being scratched
*. Androphobia– fear of men
*. Anthophobia– fear of flowers
*. Anthropophobia– fear of people or the company of people, a form of social phobia
*. Antlophobia– fear of floods
*. Aquaphobia– fear of water. Distinct from hydrophobia, a scientific property that makes chemicals averse to interaction with water, as well as an archaic name for rabies
*. Arachnophobia– fear of spiders
*. Astraphobia– fear of thunderand lightning
*. Astrophobia– fear of outer space
*. Atychiphobia– fear of failure
*. Automatonophobia– fear of anything that falsely represents a sentient being
*. Autophobia– fear of ones potential actions or capabilities
*. Aviophobia, aviatophobia – fear of flying
B
*. Barophobia– fear of gravity
*. Bibliophobia– fear of books
*. Blood-injection-injury type phobia– a DSM-IVsubtype of specific phobias
C
*. Chaetophobia– fear of hair
*. Chemophobia– fear of chemicals
*. Chionophobia– fear of snow
*. Chiroptophobia– fear of bats
*.Chlorophobia – fear of the color green [ 3 ]
*. Chromophobia, chromatophobia – fear of colors
*. Chronophobia– fear of time and time moving forward
*.Chrysophobia – fear of the color orange [ 3 ]
*. Cibophobia, sitophobia– aversion to food, synonymous to anorexia nervosa
*. Claustrophobia– fear of having no escape and being closed in
*. Cleithrophobia– fear of being trapped [ 4 ]
*. Coulrophobia– fear of clowns(not restricted to evil clowns)
*.Cyanophobia – fear of the color blue [ 3 ]
*. Cyberphobia– fear of or aversion to computersand of learning new technologies
D
*. Decidophobia– fear of making decisions
*. Dentophobia, odontophobia – fear of dentistsand dental procedures
*. Disposophobia– fear of getting rid of or losing things – sometimes wrongly defined as compulsive hoarding
*. Dysmorphophobia, or body dysmorphic disorder– a phobic obsession with a real or imaginary body defect
E
*. Emetophobia– fear of vomiting
*. Eosophobia, phengophobia – fear of daylight
*. Epistemophobia, gnosiophobia – fear of knowledge
*. Ergophobia, ergasiophobia – fear of work or functioning, or a surgeon's fear of operating
*. Erotophobia– fear of sexual love or sexual abuse
*. Erythrophobia, erytophobia, ereuthophobia – fear of the color red
F
*.Friggatriskaidekaphobia, paraskavedekatriaphobia, paraskevidekatriaphobia – fear of Friday the 13th
*. Frigophobia– fear of becoming too cold
G
*. Gamophobia– fear of marriage, commitment
*. Gelotophobia– fear of being laughed at
*. Gephyrophobia– fear of bridges
*. Genophobia, coitophobia – fear of sexual intercourse
*. Gerascophobia– fear of growing old or aging
*. Gerontophobia– fear of growing old, or a hatred or fear of the elderly
*. Globophobia– fear of balloons, or balloons popping – a branch of phonophobia [ 5 ]
*. Glossophobia– fear of speaking in public or of trying to speak
*. Gymnophobia– fear of nudity
*. Gynophobia– fear of women
H
*. Hadephobia, stigiophobia, stygiophobia – fear of Hell [ 6 ]
*. Halitophobia– fear of bad breath
*. Haphephobia– fear of being touched
*. Heliophobia– fear of the sunor sunlight
*. Hemophobia, haemophobia – fear of blood
*. Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobi a– fear of the number 666
*. Hoplophobia– fear of weapons, specifically firearms(generally a political term but the clinical phobia is also documented)
*. Hylophobia– fear of trees, forestsor wood
*. Hypnophobia, somniphobia – fear of sleep
I
*. Ichthyophobia– fear of fish, including fear of eating fish, or fear of dead fish
K
*.Koumpounophobia – fear of buttons [ 7 ]
*. Kakorrhaphiophobia, atychiphobia– fear of failure
L
*. Logophobia– fear of words
*. Leukophobia– fear of the color white
*. Lilapsophobia– fear of tornadoesor hurricanes
*. Lipophobia– fear or avoidance of fatsin food
Jokes Etc / Laugh Ur Ribs Out (2) by Sholah96(m): 6:20pm On Jul 10, 2014
A man gets on a bus, and ends up sitting next to a very attractive nun. Enamored with her, he asks if he can have sex with her. Naturally, she says no, and gets off the bus. The man goes to the bus driver and asks him if he knows of a way for him to have sex with the nun. "Well," says the bus driver, "every night at 8 o'clock, she goes to the cemetery to pray. If you dress up as God, I'm sure you could convince her to have sex with you." The man decides to try it, and dresses up in his best God costume. At eight, he sees the nun and appears before her. "Oh, God!" she exclaims. "Take me with you!" The man tells the nun that she must first have sex with him to prove her loyalty. The nun says yes, but tells him she prefers anal sex. Before you know it, they're getting down to it, having nasty, grunty, loud sex. After it's over, the man pulls off his God disguise. "Ha, ha!" he says, "I'm the man from the bus!" "Ha, ha!" says the nun, removing her costume, "I'm the bus driver!"
Jokes Etc / Laugh Ur Ribs Out (2) by Sholah96(m): 6:13pm On Jul 10, 2014
A man gets on a bus, and ends up sitting next to a very attractive nun. Enamored with her, he asks if he can have sex with her. Naturally, she says no, and gets off the bus. The man goes to the bus driver and asks him if he knows of a way for him to have sex with the nun. "Well," says the bus driver, "every night at 8 o'clock, she goes to the cemetery to pray. If you dress up as God, I'm sure you could convince her to have sex with you." The man decides to try it, and dresses up in his best God costume. At eight, he sees the nun and appears before her. "Oh, God!" she exclaims. "Take me with you!" The man tells the nun that she must first have sex with him to prove her loyalty. The nun says yes, but tells him she prefers anal sex. Before you know it, they're getting down to it, having nasty, grunty, loud sex. After it's over, the man pulls off his God disguise. "Ha, ha!" he says, "I'm the man from the bus!" "Ha, ha!" says the nun, removing her costume, "I'm the bus driver!"
Jokes Etc / Laugh Ur Ribs Out by Sholah96(m): 5:50pm On Jul 10, 2014
A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?” The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.” “Onions?” the son asks. “Yes. You see them and they make you cry.” This infuriated his wife and daughter. The daughter asks, “Mom, how many different kinds of willies are there?” The mother smiles and says, “Well, dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.” “A Christmas tree?” the daughter asks. “Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.”

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