Why lie?

This is how people invite marine spirit into their homes. Trouble de sleep yanga de wake am.

inspirator1:
Your husband is not a fool. He is a top-notch player; with all the replies you said he gives, it clearly shows he is upto something.
.
Today i was playing Chess with a pro. In one of our games, i gave him all my principal pieces even to my queen. There was this joy of winning me on his face but suddenly horror filled expression became his lot, when my pun was check mating him and another pun on the verge of being a queen.
.
Don't stand in the way of your husband. He has a game at hand, which will be brutal And lead to death; if he is my kind of man. Just be a faithful and committed wife. The fear of your ex coming around tells him that Okbfor's can have effect on you and sends the wrong message of you leaving your past. Act cool, then deal with your ex in a thousand ways to die.

My husband tells me he is not stupid for allowing my ex to visit his home but me I am not comfortable with my ex's visit.

ngwababe:



Sifonabasi, all I can deduce from this comment is that, your husband might be a gay, so he went for one that's closest to you so you won't suspect him(them). But you can still prove Nwamaikpe wrong

My husband's closeness to my ex is as a result of the contract my husband. Not that there wasn't another person to give the contract. My husband chose him for two reasons.
1. We are both from the same place and my ex is expertise in that field.

2. My husband promised to sponsor my ex's wedding and since he isn't ready for marriage my husband uses the contract as a sign of appreciate.

I don't know two people coming together for business purpose means the are gay.

na2016:


Such a dumb and stupid comment.
@sifonabasi, eyeneka mmi, I hope you open up to your husband that this guy was your ex and that you are not comfortable with him around. Any sensible man, will not want an ex to be around his wife!

He is aware.

Mizwisdom:


I'm sure you didn't bother to read her previous thread about this man. He has been sleeping with her for any favor he grants even while dating her husband. This was happening while she was single and he still continue asking her for sex even as a married woman. Don't you think he needs a violent approach to teach him a lesson? how can he have the guts to sneak into her family through her husband?,he's still demanding for sex and she's physically weak to resist him..she will soon give in again, that's why I suggested it. that's a good way out of this mess

I have never slept with him while dating my husband. He was outside the country before I met my husband.

jaxxy:


Not every ex is a terrible person. Aslong as ur ex was good to u when u were dating and even after and now Ure married and he’s meet ur husband and no longer interested or disturbing u for anything I don’t see any problem here.

For ur husband to still associate with him despite all u told him only means he understand the kind of man he is and knows he isn’t as bad as u think and carries no bad intentions towards u guys. That is a good thing.


I have also gotten to know a cool guy just cos he was dating my ex(kinda) and how we got talking was pretty ackward bt we have a decent conversation and he explained his serious intentions towards her and he didn’t mind us being frnds. Quite unusual bt I respected him for that and even stopped calling or chatting the gal. I chat with him more and we discuss biz together so I don’t see so much negativity in this Aslong as ur ex respects ur marriage and has moved on. Cheers.

Whenever he visits and I told him my husband isn't around, he will tell me he's aware that my husband too is aware he is in my house. After asking me about my baby he doesn't talk to me again. He will concentrate on watching tv. He doesn't have my number and doesn't ask for it. My am not comfortable with his presence.

SavageMaster:


You were not aware of his visit. Did your husband preinform you the guy was coming? If the answer is NO, then you should have kept him outside, let him stay there till your husband arrives. That way, you would have sent a clear message to him and your husband as well.

Take it a step further. Let him.be meeting your husband in his office, and not in your matrimonial home, since it's business matters they're discussing. Or is your husband up to something else?

We are both from the same LGA. My ex and I are fpom the same hometown while my husband from 3villages away.

Fixed:


Politely?

Madam, there lies the root of your problem. Your heart is still very much with your ex. In fact, this same reason is why you don't want him around you so as not to refuel the undying flame despite the fact that you already had a child for your husband in 2018. From your old thread, I would rather say you were double dating instead of saying prostituting; having an affair with your now husband and seeing this your ex then. What more is there if you called someone an ex and you were still sleeping with him, business as usual.

To look for how to dispense him politely means you respect him and wouldn't want to hurt his feelings. If you truly need a solution then I am sorry to tell you that only a radical approach will get him off your back. A radical approach towards him and towards your husband.

I will suggest you try out the following somewhat polite ways:

1. Report him to his fiance since he is getting married and to all the people you know that can talk sense into him. At least you should know them while you guys dated. I expect the fiance to appreciate this though it must be carefully handled so it doesn't backfire.

2. If your husband has not gotten the full story of your relationship with this ex, then it is time to divulge the information in a manner that will not hurt his feeling.

3. Have a heart to heart talk with your husband and let him know that he is courting trouble by going close to the guy. He should suspend any assistance being offered forthwith. See to it that there is no direct help coming from your husband to him. He should not sponsor the wedding.

4. If your husband does not yield to your pleading, look for someone he respects to counsel him.

5. Whenever, your ex comes around lock your door. If he finds his way in, do something very drastic in your husbands presence. Show him he is not wanted around you.

6. Report him to police that he constitutes a threat to your life.

There are 1,001 impolite ways to send him away. Some will sound like comedy while others will be totally outrageous. But I leave them to you to think about when you are truly ready to break free from him.

When I met my husband my ex was oversea. He came back after my wedding so nothing like double dating. To my knowlege, he doesn't have a fiacee yet. He's not in a relationship.

Ekaka1:

Several people on here have asked her if her husband is aware ..he is her ex but she's not answered that question yet

He is aware. Last two years my husband and I went to report my ex to my ex mother.
The problem started again when he was given my address to attend my child's party.

Thegoodone13:
Your husband knew what you didn't tell him through your ex. Your husband does not love you again and you need to work on him. He does not care if your ex sleep with you now. Tell your ex not to come around again and tell your husband not to allow your ex in your house again. If he refuses, tell your pastor or elderly person that your husband can obey. Value your marriage. Let me ask you one question. Did u have sex with your ex after married your husband? If yes, your husband know about it.

No I didn't.

uruba23:
After going through your first thread I am curious. ..Have you paid him all his money back. I think he might be black mailing you emotionally have you told your husband what transpired between both of you.

He refuses to collect his money back. Even with interest

dalass:
Tell him yourself.. Through WhatsApp or text..

He just wanna be startin something.

I don't have his number.

Wisest101:
Madam
I guess you did not listen to the advice someone gave you some years back..i had to go back to your previous post, and I found little wisdom there.
Kindly go back and check..

He was giving you money while you kept on offering him sex. That's PROSTITUTION, but I don't have problems with that, it's common with you ladies.



Back to your issue.



MISTAKE ; When you were dating your husband, you made a mistake by not letting your him know about an unfulfilled agreement you had with one of your exes. This wouldn't have gotten to this extent had it being you told him.



AGREEMENT ; Your ex has every right to do whatever he's doing now because it was bargained and an agreement between you both, you took his money in an agreement to sleep with him, it doesn't matter if you are married or not, it's an agreement.



WAYWARDNESS ; You were a prostitute during your school days, sleeping with a man to get financial rewards is prostitution, waywardness, irresponsible and very bad. And you are now paying the price.



RISK ; You are married, if you sleep with your ex, you will regret it, he MIGHT end up blackmailing you with pictures, videos or proofs that you just slept with him, and with that he'll keep asking for sex from you.



STRANGE ; I'm yet to understand the kind of pussay you have that someone had to travel outside all to come back insisting he'll sleep with you even when you pleaded to refund him twice, this your pussay na Belgium made o.





ADVICE ; I might not be able to give you a good advice that will help resolve the issue, but I can give you an advice on how to remain on a safer side.



My dear. Don't fulfill that promise, don't do it.



Why? Because It's better to fail a promise you made out of desperation than to break the vows you made to your husband before the altar and loved ones.





KINDLY TELL YOUR HUSBAND. You can't handle this alone without falling astray, I know how hard it might seem for you to tell him, but just do it.

I have told him. I even told him I'd go report to my ex's mother. My husband said he isn't stupid for allowing my ex to visit that I shouldn't worry about my ex.

SHOPPERS:
Sometimes, men become so friendly with each other to the point of trusting way beyond what women can understand.

Though your ex is obviously overdoing things, your husband has grown to trust him and believes he won't dare do anything.

But your husband is ignoring the fact that as a lady, you lost your virginity to that same guy and can easily be swayed in a moment of flimsy passion.

You guys should stop tempting the devil. Okafor's law is real.

Stand up and explain to your ex himself that you don't find it convenient having him around. It's not that you don't trust him but seeing him around brings uncomfortable memories back and that is having bad effects on your thoughts.

Tell him to politely stay away and only ensure he comes at after verifying that your husband is at home.

Make him realize that you're not against his friendship with your husband as long as it doesn't extend to having him around when you alone are at home.

If he's sensible, he should understand and back off.

Even normal husband's friends are not supposed to come visit when he himself is not at home. It's a dangerous setup.

........

The guy might not even have anything in mind, but make him realize that it is making you uncomfortable.

Do this when next he comes around... At the gate. And turn him back on the way to his house.

Thank you sir. I've told him. Yesterday when he visited I franked at him and he told me he didn't come for me that my husband was aware of his visit.
He visits and 30mins later my husband drove in. They sat and talked, drank and he went home.

AFONAMARO:


I am still wondering why on earth your husband should be friends your ex, is your hubby insecure in anyway?

As for your question, simply tell your ex to stay away from your home and ensure to tell your hubby that you ain't comfortable with the idea of him coming to the house.

It's not every issue that requires counseling, counsel yourself at times

I have done all these and my husband told me not to worry. For my ex, I told him if he must visit he should come only when my husband is at home.

Foodqueen:
Tell your husband that u are not comfortable with him around.

I have told him. He said I shouldn't worry.
My husband promised to sponsor his edding whenever he wants to marry as an appreciation for all he did for me when I was single.
Just to please him, last year my husband awarded him a contract and that contract brought them together.

During my child's naming ceremony he was given our house address.

Pavore9:
And your husband is clearly aware he is your ex?

Yes. We hard an issue last two years that leads to their union.
Read my first thread on this forum you will know what happened.

Good morning friends.

Please how can I politely stop my ex from visiting my home?

Yesterday was the third time my husband returns from work to meet my ex in our house.

After the incident that happened between us, my ex started coming closer to my husband and they became distance friends.
My husband invited him to our child's naming ceremony and that was how he got to know our house.

Eversince then he has been visiting and I am not comfortable with it.
I told if he must come he should come when my husband is around.

Please what should I do?

realtalk19:

wow!

Yes so! God is God. Goodmorning.

castrol180:


Good to know and hear that...but all the while when that your ex was shagging you and despite that he deflowered you didn't you have any enceite then?

I didnt