MrBrownJay1:


true but probably the reason for such negative thoughts is because of the pressure that the family puts upon him/her to find a job and be self sufficient etc.

The truth is that ... I am a computer science graduate with 3rd class... With all I have heard about how 3rd class certificate is so useless... I zeroed my mind on anything education immediately after I graduated, I felt going into any business that I liked was the way forward...

Me still depending on my elder brothers, and also me not doing enough to come up with something while still in my 20's knowing my 3rd class is a as good as useless... I wasted my early 20's doing nothing...

And now my brothers can't even get me a job, neither can they just dish out money to me to go start any business I like...

Probably if I have started something without telling them maybe by now I would have learnt alot through experience... But like I said I grew up waiting upon them, telling them everything... The moment I brought up that idea of opening a cafe to start something and they quashed it, infact the words were (is that what u want for Ur life?) The moment those words came out I felt useless instantly... And I kept on depending on them hoping they would come up with something good for me, but as years roll by, nothing tangible, they suggested Forex trading which I learnt, nothing came out, I am trying UI UX... Still struggling to get clients and make my first sale...

Infact the moment they asked me about my transcript and certificate which I told them I haven't collected fours years after graduation, they concluded I was not serious in life (where as I have long ago written my mind off those certificate)

Hmmmm in fact the story is so long... I just need help on where I have to start my life from

But he's no longer a Catholic priest na

MrBrownJay1:


listen...
A) you have to go at the source of your problems, and thats your brotha. whatever you may have done in the past is the past, and nothing you do today can change that.
B) stop trying to compare your life with his. stop trying to value your life upon what he has achieved (at your age). you guys are different and what works for Jide may not be what works for Tunde. the fact that he will use his life to belittle yours, is silly.
C) again, you need to talk to your brotha and make him understand that you are doing your best to be better, and talking down on you is not helping the situation.... nor is suicide.

They wanted the best for me, wanted me to start life without much struggles, but they are forgetting I have some weakness that's limiting me and not making me to achieve as much as they did when they were my age...

The whole mistake I made was when I was in my 20's...

I never did anything to better my life... Now am so bleeped up...

budaatum:


This is not true! Op said the "the thought of committing suicide has just gone to an all time high", which means the thought of committing suicide was high before the brother said anything.

Op should stop blaming others and take responsibility for op's self, for not is part of the source of op's problems!

I was raised up to look up or rather depend on my two brothers, hence I never realized one day I will have to stand on my own as a man, my two elder brothers always provide me with clothing and shoes mostly the one they use they dash me...

I so much depended on them that I forgot about my life, I wasted my 20's and now in my early 30's the past is now hunting me...

I would have taken a rash decision in doing any odd job just to make sure am using my hands to do something good for myself but my fear is that I don't want to take a decision that they would wash their hands totally from my life, and then when I am struggling they would say , it's u who chose this line...

3 years ago when I finished my nysc I thought of opening a cyber cafe but I was discouraged that such can't sustain me, 3 years on I don't have any source of livelihood, no job, no house...

With what he said to me days ago, I just feel like... That's it, I have to go and hustle my life out and not think of them anymore... Like I said I have literally lost confidence in the people I once looked up to...

MrBrownJay1:


listen...
A) you have to go at the source of your problems, and thats your brotha. whatever you may have done in the past is the past, and nothing you do today can change that.
B) stop trying to compare your life with his. stop trying to value your life upon what he has achieved (at your age). you guys are different and what works for Jide may not be what works for Tunde. the fact that he will use his life to belittle yours, is silly.
C) again, you need to talk to your brotha and make him understand that you are doing your best to be better, and talking down on you is not helping the situation.... nor is suicide.

May God help me here...

MrBrownJay1:


tell that brotha of yours how his harsh words made you feel suicidal... and that, as much as you may have been a failure, there is no need to remind you everytime something is not the way he wants it to be.

I can't even talk to him currently, I just feel so bad with all he said to me, I just need someone to give me a good advice on what to do with my life at this stage...

Truth be told at my current age, he himself has achieved alot before he eventually left the shores of the country, but I have not yet started my own life let alone dreaming of achieving even 10% of all he achieved when he was my age...

He meant well for me, but am afraid he has made me lost so much confidence in him and my relationship with him at the moment is not a sweet one...

And all these is because I don't have a job and I have never worked for any organisation all my life, compared to him...

Life is not easy for me at the moment I must confess

To me o... It depends, and the law of physics has alot to do there...

Like charges repel while unlike charges attract...

As a man u can work successfully with a female boss

As a lady e get as e be, and e be as e get...

I have never felt this depressed all my life, and the thought of committing suicide has just gone to an all time high ... All thanks to my elder brother who finished me with some deregatory words, reminding me of my failures in life...

Ever since he lambasted me with harsh words, I have lost hope and confidence... His words keep on reminiscing to me that am a failure and I should end it all...

Suicide is not something someone just wake up one day and comit ... It's a collection of several events in the past that drives one to think about suicide...

I need help on my life...