₦airaland Forum

Dtruthspeaker:
Now you are looking for a confession or your catching her in the act. Your moving post to this already proves you know that she is cheating

Bro, I am not scared of knowing the truth. There are lot of beautiful women out there. By the way Marriage is not even compulsory.

Recieving a message does not proof she slept with the person. She did not even have any long conversation with the person. Max calling time was 43 seconds.

The other calls were missed calls.

Johnfaithsexy:
I don't know why a married woman go dey talk with another man and keeping it secret, like wetin you dey hide if nor be bad thing,I mean if you nor wan keep your body for only your man,then you have no business with marriage,cos the day you say I do,Dem nor point gun for your head,na personal choice,and you say I do to staying faithful to your man,am not married but I know this is the way it's suppose to be,thank you

You are spot on. Honestly

Dtruthspeaker:
You are obviously afraid of directly accusing her of adultery, even though it is obvious that she is guilty of it

Na she dey feed you?

Even you know that she is bedding other men

Well I am not. I did not see a clear evidence that she was cheating. I only saw clear evidence of not setting boundaries. From my observation I also see lack of respect.

@CorrectionFLuid
So even though you have a point. You are not completely right. Firstly I have alot of beautiful female friends and she knows. So the question of, if I am desired by women is not even questionable.

The only reason why she checks my phone is to ensure I am not cheating. I dont even have the time for cheating. Cos I am super engaged in so many activities.

As for her cheating with that man. Based on the investigation I did. Nothing proves that she is cheating.

The man sent her messages and she did not reply to any. The man called her 2 times. She only picked 1 call which lasted for only 43 seconds.

if a woman is cheating there should be several long calls.

So there is no evidence to suggest that she is cheating.

Infact her explanation of telling the guy he was speaking to the wrong lady adds up on the 43 seconds call.

Mind you, I checked her phone with out giving any prior notice for her to prepare a response.

The only evidence is not setting clear boundaries. That man should be blocked on the spot simple.

@LilMissFavvy so I did not accuse her of cheating, seems you did not read well. I asked her to set boundaries. She did not give explanation.

Does she have a lot of admirers, The answer is YES. Even in my compound, 1 or 2 neighbours have asked for her number which I repelled them.

So some hours ago she gave an explanation clarifying that when she went to the market. Her friend who sell jewelleries used her phone to exchange number with a tooster. So the Tooster felt he was talking to her friend.

According to her, he had sent alot of voice messages that she deleted. That message was the last one. So if I put the pieces together, on normal call he called her 2 times.

1st call was 43 secs, Second call was a missed call. Infact if she explained this to me. I would not be worried. Cos I never accused her of anything. I only said you must set boundaries. I also set boundaries with ladies. I do not go telling women I want to sleep with them.

I give her 100 percent loyalty even though I have the money to cheat. So I am also very accountable when she views my phone.

So I expect that same level of respect.

if u read well u wud see she has access to mine.

She gave no explanation, rather manipulation and walked away rudely.

I also did not see boundaries, all I see is manipulation

So I checked my wife phone 2 days back cos I saw some usual behaivour from her sending a voice note to someone arround 10pm.

So there was a particular chat were a guy sent 3 messages greening her as usual.

The 4th message was a voice note. Which goes does ?

"What I mean is I would like you and I to sleep together."

So I saw a missed call on her whatsapp from the guy. I went to normal call. I saw 1 missed call and another call that was successful.

So I could establish that both of them had a phone conversation.

When I heard the voice note. I pretended like I had not seen any thing. Later she saw me looking at her tiktok and she asked for her phone.


2 days after. I asked her why is it that she is not keeping boundaries with some of her male friends. So she asked why I said so. According to her she blocks alot of guys on her whatsapp.

Then I collected her phone from her and played the voice note.

The statement from her, "was ooo that messsage was for someone else". The guy was refering to someone else.

But the voice note I heard was directed to her not some else. According to her that he was referring to some other lady.

So I asked her, ok tell me the story behind this lady that prompts this dude to send you this voice note.

Her response: Dont worry it none of your business, you dont need to know about it.

That got me angry, Then I told her. Look in a marriage you are suppose to respect your husband and honor him. I did not accuse you of cheating, I only said you should set boundaries. if you tired of the marrriage you are free to walk away.

Her response: You are not the only man.

According to her she does not have time for cheating but my problem here is, I only asked she set boundaries and for explanations. I was extremely polite.

Infact I just think marriage is not worth it honestly. Today's women are something else.

By the way she as access to my phone and I always clearify any chat that she has concerns with cos I dont cheat on her.

You are not a big boy. I have way more than you and I handle alot of responsiblities.
I dont see the responsibility that you are handling.
You are just comfortable that is all.

davinchi101:
Dear seniors, I'm currently at a crossroad. Just want to know if level of education really matters in selecting a wife.

The graduate fiancee I have is really giving me issues. She's unruly, hardly admit her errors, gives attitude over every misunderstanding.

She's currently running her Masters, while I'm just with my Bsc.

If I see a less educated one (maybe with just SSCE), with good wifely characteristics, and would give peace of mind, do you think one should go for her regardless of her educational qualifications.

I'm just worried about the Children we would have. I believe when both parents have strong educational background, it will tell on the children. I seriously need your inputs

Reality is that it matters. But one thing I learnt is that a woman's education does not make her a good wife.

A woman might be a professor and be the worst wife.
There was a case of a lawyer that stabbed her husband to death.

Think things again. I once dated a master student and ended the relationship because she was extremely rude.

As long as you can carry the bills of sickle cell and also deal with the emotional trauma and delicate nature of her health.
Go ahead. Otherwise please I would advice you think it well.

Exceed15:
She behaves like she's doing you favor. That girl will frustrate u big time if u married her. Don't say I didn't warn u.

You are correct bro, Meself don they find way to break up. I have already informed family asap. Honestly Tpain economy is really hard for extra stress walaiiii

Abeg it because you dont have money. Na why 40GB they mean much to you. She is a movie addict. She no kill person.

studyless123:
It's same way men are attracted to physically fit women. Fitness is a holistic concept that everyone needs. You should understand that women need the gyms as much as the men. If you don't want your girl to go to the gym, purchase the equipment in the house.
Saying your girl should not go to the gym for whatever reason is not different from telling women not to go to pursue higher education because of the level of immorality in schools.

dont compare higher education to the gym. They are completely different. Most people in the gym go there for purposes aside fitness. It a fornication ground.

Nnamdipapa:
You assume every guy sending you a request wants to date you or have a relationship with you?

What a shallow way of reasoning and you think so highly of yourself madam.

Thanks for stating this. This was my thoughts. I only wanted a one to one conversation with a lady following the thread. There are some details I did not add to the initial post.

@elmagnifico411 hey man I am not condoning any thing. I resist every disrespect. Unfortunately some people here assume that I condone it.

A lot of men here come with redpill and act like they Know it all. Firstly there is no manual to a girl you would date and how she would act. I have met a 20 year old lady that graduated has a virgin and stayed till marriage has a virgin.

I have also seen a 26 year old that was still sleeping arround. Currently married women are sleeping arround causing a lot of DNA saga. Been promiscus has nothing to do with age. It is just the nature of the individual.

So firstly you need to talk to her about marriage, is she ready for an early marriage.

If she is, then she would consider setting boundaries for you.

If she is not ready for an early marriage please just knack and go.

No matter what you do, she would cheat on you because she is in her exploration stage of life.

So right now if you have an opportunity to knack her, please do. That gives you some leverage.

Women are emotionally attached to sex, except the prostitutes that sleep with random men.

It quite interesting that some of you come online to make destructive comments. Unfortunately a lot of Nigerians have attitude issues the major reason why our country is so backward. I am not stupid when I decided to take a second looks. Breaking up is already in one of my agendas but if I do that I need to be diplomatic with how it carried out becos both families are already involved. Currently I am doing my background investigations to just figure out some things.

I would love to say a big thank you to all does that gave constructive feedbacks.

Also I would like to pass this message to does who gave stupid feedbacks, please try and fix your lives before condemning others.
I know a lot of you saying rubbish online are outright disgrace to your careers and family. Fix your selves first before condemning others. Even jobless people come online to ran bullshit, including simps too.

@pete1234 you gave the most useful and related information to me. Thanks alot. This is the question I have been asking her of recent. Mostly I would involve her family very soon.

@Therock5555 check my profile I have never brought any issues online.

I have been on nairaland for probably 10 years.

If I bring an issue once in 10 years it just because I want to see things from another opinion. I already made my decisions on what to do.

@Samantha125 I dont have financial issues. If you read well you would realize. I just added a few people. You can ignore.

@ Lalami3232 hey man. I dont do public view honestly. I take decisions on my own. If you read my post. I always make it clear to her. This marriage thing is not by force. I have given her an open slate to take a decision. But the occurence is becoming too much. Any small argument. Let scatter everything. That got me wondering myself.

So I am dating this lady and we intend getting married in January unfortunately there is this terrible signs I noticed.
Anytime there is any little misunderstanding she comes our ranting, "Let me know if this is not going to work so we scatter every thing". So I always ask a simple conversation that matured adults can seat down and resolve you end up shouting on me and telling me let scatter every thing. 99 percent of times I hear that statement, I always tell her that this is not a forced relationship or marriage. If you think you are not ok with this upcoming marriage. Kindly let me know and work away. Yesterday she came home arround 9pm which is far from close time. So I asked her when do you close in a polite way. This simple question ended up in me recieving alot of insults, shouting and let us scatter every thing, I am tired. You dont have time for me bla bla bla bla. This is someone that I am always indoor working from home 2 4 7. I run multiple jobs to ensure that I can provide and create a 5 year plan for the upcoming marriage. I explain everything to her as I make progress. Infact I am the one responsible for all her bills. I carry 100 percent financial responsibility. Honest I am just thinking.......

The bible says he who finds a wife has found a good thing. I am surprised some people are saying that you dont need it.

So how do you really know who is been sincere to you. The reality is at some point in your relationship you need to do all this.

The major reason why alot of you get surprised when a DNA shows that her ex boy friend owns your first child.

If you can not deal with heart break, don't even go into a relationship. It is a risk dating an individual that you dont know. So you must have a
strong heart to see when the person is cheating or not. If you are not willing to find out the truth then be ready to father another mans child.

Cholera symtops go to the hospital

I dont think she loves you brother. See if a woman loves you and you don't call her for 1 week. She would call you and asked if it was becos of the argument and she would bury her pride and appologies.

I have an assignment for you.

I think you need to run a loyalty test on her. Bug her phones also. Bug her sms and watch this girl closely.

There is a very big possibility that she is seeing another man.

One of the signs of a lady seeing another man is out right disregards for the man she is dating.

She does not regard you. This is beyond her been stubborn.

I hope you are married to this guy. You going through alot for a boy friend.

Make sure you dont live in same area with her husband. Dont call or text period.

I been fucking too many pussys na why. What about you bro ?

So OP, if I am going to be honest with you.

The lady has good home training and very homely. She knows how to make a man homely but she's a free giver.

Firstly you meet her just few months ago and she has moved in with you.

Also she has numerous body count and I can tell you that she may not tell you all.

I would advice you pretend like body count does not matter to you, she go tell you more later.

Also I would also advice you bug her phone and check her whatsapp. The problem with this kinds of ladies is that there would always be one ex somewhere that would want to eat from the same plate with you.

Also can you satisfy her in bed, if your answer is NO. I advice you break the relationship immediately. She would go back to one of her exes.

Then you would add up to the list of body count. I pity her unfortunate husband.

shutup. The old cargos are pretty. Appreciate idiot.

So you made a little mistake. What you could have done was to hack her phone whatsapp and watch her conversation with that guy.

Don't give her rooms to start deleting her chat. Be quite on the issue. Just try and see how you can connect her whatsapp to your computer. Watch the conversation with that Guy.

So this issue is in two ways.

1. Possibility 1: your girl friend just had sex with some random guy and she is scared it could lead to pregnancy.
What you should have done ? You dont ask women a direct question. You would never get the truth out of her.
Confronting her was very wrong. You would have simply asked her if she has just finished her period and get the exact time she finished it.
Then read the chat again and put the pieces together. THen the truth would be obvious to you.

2. Possibility 2: She is actually telling the truth. She probably has a friend who just had sex after her period.

So this is the solution I would give you. Find a way to connect her whatsapp to your computer without her knowing.

Please remain silent on that issue. Don't ask her any questions. Then keep reading her chat.

Also try and use indirect questions to know when she last did her period. By the way dont do this now. Let her forget.

Also note the date this issue came up. Now you need to be very conversants with dates. This ways you would be able to put the pieces together and figure out the truth.

Do IVF if you want her simple.