₦airaland Forum

This argument is interesting I must say.

Let's assume the Sun's gravitational pull is strong enough to make Jupiter orbit around it. The same force is responsible for making a smaller Mercury orbit round the Sun.

Now my question goes thus. What is keeping the Sun from pulling a smaller and closer Mercury to itself. Since the closer an object is to a larger object, the stronger the gravitational pull.

If you say there is a counter force keeping Mercury from reaching the Sun's surface. Then what force is responsible? A star? A planet? Last I checked, all planets do not orbit the Sun relative of each other.

P.S Don't tell me centripetal and centrifugal force bla bla bla. Just tell me the actual force keeping Mercury from crashing into the Sun .

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hardeybaryor91 hello bro. How was the panel interview? Pls let's chat privately.

When insanity pays. Who cares?

goodyboo:
not at all my dear...its for pipu checking their dashboards.

I'm not afraid of anything.

anyhow it comes ooo ,I go take am.

Exactly what I asked u dear, dd u chk ur mail?

onweson:
Always go to the presence of God spiritually minded so you could stand against every temptation to sleeping in the church.

Don't take it too serious.

Krystalzkris:
lwkmd... In dis case,u fall ur hand,u should have just started shouting Jesus when d usher touched u.. Next story,ud tell dem is that you had a vision of hell and heaven... Would have saved u d embarrasment...

Looolz. Then I'd come up with a list of those who made heaven baa.

Title: The Most Awkward Thing I've Done In Church.
www.nairaland.com/2658329/most-awkward-thing-ive-done#
Thanks

Fembleez1:
Lol

If early morning mass no fit you, you better change schedule. I hope say you go fit attend next week?

looolz sure. but e go be anoda out station.

begod:
i would need your assistance

I've replied your mail.

yanabasee:
Buahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

OP.... You're very funny!

And I admire ur writing skills....

Lol.... U messed it up! And I'm sure u won't try attended mass next sunday! You wouldn't afford to sell ur face again!

That is ehh, I'd go to the closest outstation.

Behira:
Too long

Thanks for pointing that out. Actually, I enjoy narrating stories to the tiniest detail. It's like seasoning to a meal.

I woke up at 5:30AM, brushed my teeth, took my bath, got dressed up on my well ironed native attire, gold colour wristwatch and necklace (emphasis on the colour, not the metal), fragrant perfume and black shiny pair of shoe. Having cut my hair the previous day, my hair was low and the razor sharp carvings were very visible. I looked at the mirror and all it reported was my magnificent reflection. I was looking sharp. I need not ask anyone how I was looking, I was very confident my outfit fitted me flawlessly.

I grabbed my Bible, hymn book and my phone as well. I usually don't go with hymn book, but since today was a special Sunday, I decided to give it a go. In all exuberance, I matched emphatically to church. I still was double minded about going with my phone though, of what use would it be?

I got to church quite early enough. So I decided to sit in the main auditorium. Of recent, it has been something of a habit to always sit outside the main auditorium, in the corridors owing to my late coming. But all that was about to change as I perched on an unoccupied extreme of the 4th pew. I don't seem to know why people prefer sitting on the extremes of a pew. I wasn't going to change that practice anyway.

Having secured a place among the front seats, I was able to have an unobstructed view of the altar. The choir stand was adjacent to my position, so close that I could hear the choir master mumble "hymn number 5" without using the mic. I opened my hymn book and joined the choir in the entrance hymn.
Soon the bell rang and the mass began.

Everything was going smoothly until the offertory collection. Towards the conclusion of the collection, I began noticing something funny. I was dozing. The nap came in series, one after another, with each lasting about 45 seconds. I tried fighting it. Honestly, I tried. I came up with a make shift plan by trying to bat my eyelids continuously until the sleep flew. And it seemed to work. Anytime I felt my eyelids were coming close like unlike poles of a magnet, I'd just blink, blink and blink again until the sleep varnished.

That remedy was short lived.


What followed next were series of prayers that demanded the whole congregation to stand, sit and kneel down at intervals. The next thing I heard was,
"let us pray",
the whole congregation including me stood up in unison to pray.
And that was it.

Soon afterwards, my upper eyelids gradually but steadily started migrating downwards. At that moment, I couldn't keep it from coming closer, even a force of 100K Newton would have stood no chance in keeping them apart. So I gave in to sleeping. What I had in mind was just to take a light nap for about 3-4 minutes; but I couldn't afford to appear sleepy before the 3 young beautiful ladies that sat by me ( I have a prestige to keep), so I placed my hands together and lifted it up to my chest region to put up a perfect disguise, appearing as if though I was praying... and then off my mind went on a voyage to dreamland. The next thing I witnessed was me dreaming about how the mass ended and I was exchanging pleasantries with my friends, taking selfies... I think I even bought roadside ice cream and buns.

All these happened amidst the prayer session that was ongoing, and of course the congregation standing up, sitting down, kneeling and standing again when due, yet I was still standing and sleeping.

The communion time came and passed, the second offertory came and passed as well... I was still standing and sleeping.

After what seemed like 30minutes, a church usher tapped twice on my shoulder, then I woke up, my hands were still glued together . For a split second, I had no Idea of what, when or where I was. In a bid to revive consciousness, I closed my eyes tight, sniffing, rubbing the back of my palm against my nostrils and shaking my head simultaneously, then I opened my eyes again, they were red, the usher must have seen the red eyes which made him grin a bit. He said he had been tapping on my shoulders for a while now, and he was on the 15th count before I woke up. That was when I realized I had been sleeping while standing (the rest of the congregation were long sitted).

The intensity of the whole scenario became clearer when I noticed the young man on the altar side delivering the church's announcement (prayers and other rites were long concluded and lasty, announcement), from the look of things, he was about concluding. As if something was waiting for me to see at the back, I turned around, lo and behold the multitudes, a million and one eyes of both familiar and unfamiliar faces were all glued at me. Like a celebrity in the disapproving sense of it. Their mouths were not moving but I could hear them speak - thanks to their wide-open eyes blaring at me with teetering revile, it did all the talking. As I turned around trying to avoid the unavoidable eye contacts, my lower jaw dropped ajar as if the screw that kept it in place was loosened, the more I turned, the wider my mouth was opened in bewilderment. I noticed that I actually was the center of attention, every direction I looked at, I saw nothing but pair of eyes fixated at me; eyes on CWO uniforms, eyes on CMO uniforms, the choristers and even the 3 young beautiful ladies that sat by me weren't left out. There were eyes every where I turned.
The look of mischief on the faces of the children on the upper layer of the church building suggested something funnier occurred, could it be that I was staggering, dangling involuntarily from one position to another while sleeping? or did I snore?...

That was when I wished rapture would occur, no no no, "mba", not rapture, not now please; Instead I wished had the powers to manipulate time, to time-travel.




Cc: Lalasticlala

johnydon22:
she is beautiful and of course i can but i will be bare breasted too if i am the groom... that is equality but if am wearing a shirt then my wife should wear one too..

she's beautiful but shy. lame culture if you ask me.



I just wanna drag ur attention back to my post (3000AD) it seems you neglected the mentions on purpose? or... uve got no response for em ( whc I doubt)

The concept of infinity is very tricky. What if I tell you some infinity is greater than some. Example, all prime numbers are a subset of all positive integer.

I can conclude saying, sum of all prime numbers are infinite, but are less than the sum of all positive integers.

Another instance, what if I add infinity plus infinity... will I get infinity or 2Infinity.

Let infinity = X
X + X = 2X
2X > X
2X = infinity
see the twist?
Infinity can be greater than infinity.


Thanks for the insight.

Pls guys, can our STRANGE poor run of form due to "the Falcao Effect"?. Is it mere coincidence that all the teams Falcao has played for struggle or worse even, do not qualify for champions league?

How manage my dear team's performance turn sour overnight as soon as falcao put pen to paper for Chelsea?

goodyboo:
Happy Sunday.

Same here. Hope you enjoyed ur weekend.

goodyboo:
u know na

Iono. You're the lecturer here.

goodyboo:
orh

orh would mean?

What is Ivanovic still doing in London?

goodyboo:
holy love na d first stage of love wey woman de take approach man.

Interesting... then which is unholy?

Uniqueness01:
Mercy! Mercy my sister carry go I dey yourside

Mercy is now ur sister... issorait.

goodyboo:
rara,na only ban,ban,ban.
if na barn of yam ,all of us for chop am belle full.

mrng to u.

Watch it dear, you might get banned as well.

Good afternoon.

goodyboo:
frm BBC, abi NYSC broadcasting cooperation?..

From goodyboocrasting...


I guess there's no news