Please I need this question answered, thanks

Hello Bella please make me anonymous, I love my boyfriend so much but he just keeps cheating, what do I do? I can’t tie him down so he won’t see other women, I know it isn’t his fault, he just can’t resist other women and they keep tempting him.


I am the church type, no makeup, I don’t wear clothes all these girls are wearing now, I don’t like going out, and we’re in a no sex type of relationship because I am born again but he isn’t, I want to marry and win him for Christ.


I have preached and counseled because I know we wrestle not against flesh and blood but principalities in higher places, I know we will end up together, I have seen visions and pastors have also told me, but what I want from you is how to make him stop cheating I am becoming a laughing stock in our community.



Talk2Bella



First of all, there was never a relationship between you two, you only think there is a relationship because you love him and that to me is false. As a born again Christian, you are not even supposed to be in a relationship characterized by present day standards, you ought to focus your energy on winning souls for Christ and not deceiving yourself.


When two people love themselves, things are involved, they are emotionally attached, they also express their love for each other by certain actions that portray such love such as charity, physical presence, communication, and above all, intimacy.


Now first of all, you are a woman, you have to look presentable; you also have to have a good dress sense! If you want your man to quit chasing other presentable ladies and you don't look presentable then I don't see any bad why the community has made a jest of you. Second, you mentioned you don't even go out, how then do you both communicate? Like seriously?


I'm not against your decision for not trying to dress indecently but when it comes to looking presentable, everyone owes themselves 100 percent attention to it. Also, If your definition of being born again is by believing you are self-righteous then you need to have a rethink about that.


Third, you should quit seeking visions and revelations from pastors about choice of life partner that is totally false as far as I’m concerned.


If you want a Godly kind of relationship, then please associate yourself with those who have the fear of the Lord.



Goodluck.


Reply From CuteHector


Talk2Bella Team


http://www.talk2bella.com/2016/10/how-do-i-win-back-cheating-boyfriend.html


Please support the ministry by subscribing to my YouTube channel , thanks


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xssy8uX3q9A

I sat one night in my room thinking; if I was possessed what type of possession would it be I wondered, would I be a marine spirit? An Ogbanje? Or just a plane ol witch or young witch whatever the case might be there’s the white witch, black, red and so many colors loll.


While I had this thought, I felt a cold breeze sweep through the room, I was lost in thought, wondering if I belonged to any of these witchery maybe my life would have been a bit better, enjoyable, less worrisome, perfect, filled with money and then I felt something touch me, just a light touch, must be the duvet I said and continued thinking.


Then I slept off, with those thoughts in my head, I felt a caress, hands all over my body, they pulled, they tugged, they caressed and then they whispered “You Called, We’re Here” I woke up with a start, jumped out of the bed, switched on the light but there was no one there.


I was scared, my heart skipping, who did I call? It was just a thought, I didn’t mean any of them, I felt maybe it was a dream after all I went back to bed with so much fear in my heart. I slept off, this time not so deep, and then I heard them “Wake her” “Wake up” “We know you’re awake” “You called” WAKE UP!


To Be Continued


http://www.talk2bella.com/2016/10/the-ghost-in-me.html

This is more like a venting mail, I don’t want her to go there and disgrace herself, she cannot act! I know that and I don’t want her to turn into a LovePeddler, most of these actresses are anyway.

I don’t want her to act and that’s final, I want to marry her but if she continues with this her acting dream, which I know she won’t realize I might just marry someone else, no way will another man be smooching and kissing my wife to be all in the name of acting.

We have been fighting a lot because of this, but I will come out triumphant, she wants to marry and I have laid down my terms, I know I am doing the right thing for the both of us, if she wants to act we can do it together while doing role play in the bedroom.


Talk2Bella.


Easy there Tiger... you haven't married her yet and you are already know what's best for her, you seem like an authoritative person, why not calm down and talk to her heart to heart to understand if Acting has been her age-long dream.


The truth is, people like you think acting is some sort of taboo that restricts out females, hence your worries. There are a lot of successful female actresses in the Movie industry of whom I believe you celebrate; I see no harm in her trying to follow her dreams in the movie industry. I suppose if your male friend were to seek your advice in venturing into acting, you would have given him your 100percent support.

As a boyfriend/fiancé, you have no right to ascertain what path of life she wishes to build a career in, I think you should rather begin to see the positivity in acting and support her immensely. But if you can't keep up with her dreams, then you ain’t the right man for her.


Goodluck.

Reply From Ikenna Ihekweazu {CuteHector}

http://www.talk2bella.com/2016/10/she-wants-to-be-actress-i-said-no.html

duduade:
Person ask question....

We see reply too....

Why still open a thread...

Jobless person

we know your type

Good day miss. I do enjoy your blog, so I decided to write about what's going on in my relationship.

I graduated highschool this year, a fresher at Babcock, but while in high school I had this long termed boyfriend. We told each other we were gonna handle the long distance relationship because he is at
another college.

The first week, he kept me updated, got me involved. Going into into the third week now, he doesn't call, nor text, but he claims school is so busy, we go on days with talking and he is always online
on WhatsApp. I don't know what to do, I'm fed up, I don't wanna break up, I really love him.


Talk2Bella.


Sweetheart you got nothing to be worried about, he needs time to adjust to his new school schedule and you do too.

He’s always on WhatsApp doesn’t mean he might be online, give him some space to adjust into his educational program.

Your email stated you’re a fresher, so I am sure you know how rigorous it is for first timers, do you honestly have so much time on your hands? You know how school is so I’d implore on his behalf to give him benefit of the doubt that he’s really busy.

Try and be scarce yourself, put much of that time you spend stalking when he’s online into your studies, with time you would notice missing him won’t be an option anymore, you miss him this much because you just recently parted ways and its new for the both of you, face that education and allow him concentrate on his, with time both of you will adjust properly and communication won’t be a problem.

http://www.talk2bella.com/2016/10/my-college-boyfriend_2.html

DeeTus:
Hahaha. I call this baby love. I don't see the two love birds being strong together.

The chick in context should simply forget about him. Being there before, so I know how it feels like. Women love guys who don't really give them so much attention. The dude is obviously dating someone else, while the lady in Nigeria seems to be so deeply in love with him, simply because she expects something fantastic in return when he returns home. It's really kind of funny and bizarre.

waitin on someone for four years isn't baby love

stephenmorris:
if you had given this advice to her won't it have been better but instead you gave her a yeye advice

please, just point out the "Yeye Advice" if you can't please just go

Cutehector:
there is absolutely nothing like cheating in a relationship.....



The only word that is valid is adultery. God will not punish me for cheating on you when we aren't married. He will punish me for committing the sin of fornication!



Don't u get it?




But when thunder will fire me is when after gettn married to a woman and making a vow till death do us part and I go against dat vow to cheat, only den will cheating be valid.



Look if she wants to break off she should break off.. that's the correct language.



Infact to the girl in question, cheating in a relationship is not a sin! Take to the ends of the earth.. I said so.

you just haven't met a girl who's not worth cheating on

cheating in any form of relationship, be it just dating or marriage is bad

stephenmorris:
u contradict ur self alot

nah I don't

firstking01:
See the kinda advice you gave your client, chai, you don cheat your bf tire.

I seem to have been misunderstood

Cutehector:
well just as you mentioned, we are dating.. not married! We aren't under any vow. So if it happens I'm in a situation where I have the urge to have sex, i"l do that without any apologies whatsoever.




It's simple... I can't do that when i'm under a vow to love u for d rest of my life.

so u encourage cheating in a relationship? good, she's a nairalander she will see this.

she needs to breakup before moving on

UrWorstNitemare:


To improve ya IQ...

I hereby recommend ..

My IQ?

Please I am in no mood

Just go

Today is your lucky day

Cutehector:
how do u tell what she wrote to you is fact? People just come up with silly stories everyday. You only then give advice to a one sided story...


That's why I like people like Njigirl(Saturday sun) she doesn't swallow what people send in to her just like that. Her replies are unbiased. Both in favor of the sender and the other person

did u see where I said him being faithful is 50/50 even when it's obvious he obviously is, 4 whole years is a long time to wait for anyone and not once has the dude come back.

if I was one side I would tell her to go ahead and cheat, its only her Vagina that would know and no one else but because I detest any form of cheating I told her to talk to her man.

A friend once told me about how his friend's wife was ill and had to be flown abroad, she was there for almost a year in the hospital and when conji wanted the finish the man, he told his wife he might cheat and the woman gave him a free pass, saying whatever he did during that period she would understand.

if women can give their boyfriends free pass to marry and have sex with white women because of papers, why can't men do the same and tell us to have sex with whoever we want till they come back?

that wasn't one sided and you know it, if u and I were dating, and I decide to go abroad to study for 2 years, will ur diick be the way I left it?

firstking01:
No vex, i think say na talk2bells i dey qoute, chai

I know

firstking01:
I dnt wanna believe you are the one that gave her that kinda unappealing advice...it's either she officially end the relationship and start a new one so she can have her sex with a clear concience or she continue to wait till her so_called bf returns from diaspora, that's if he won't return with one white lady that gave him green card o...that's my own advice.

thats exactly my point, even if someone is cheating u don't cheat back, u move ahead and meet someone new, I don't understand what CuteHector is saying fa, its very possible she's been faithful girls love this abroad relationship and can wait for life

UrWorstNitemare:
OP I av bin Observing you...

You go post question

and then

your advice to dat question.

Wadaya now expect N landers to do ??

APPLAUD


** e be like say you still dey learn work**

not again

Cutehector:
abegi... like as if twenty other men in nigeria aren't asking he out as well.. her boyfriend has been away for four years and she hasn't slept with another man.


If I slap her eh.. what sort of white lie is that.

so where does my "Rubbish Advice" come in

I told her to move on only after she'd broken up with the guy

and yes she might have been faithful

I had an aunt who was married and the husband went abroad to look for greener pastures leaving her with a kid, she waited for 10 whole years not knowing the man was married with kids there sef

conji wanted to finish her life, she kept waiting for him till they brought proof he was married

please don't call my advice useless if you can't point out my wrongs

thanks

Cutehector:
Bia talk2bella what sort of rubbish advice do u give to your clients sef.

u want her to cheat or or to cheat biko

it's obvious dude might have gotten married to a white lady over there

iAMzick:
Na because of people like her dem dey sell cucumber for market na.. .. ..

really

My boyfriend has been abroad for the past four years and I have never slept with another man, he hasn’t been home once during those four years and we speak once a week or sometimes twice in a month.


For a while now I have not been able to quell the sexual urge I feel, my intimacy gadgets aren’t working anymore, I need to be held, cuddled, kissed, I need to feel a man pounding me while sweating, but for four whole years I have not been able to.


I know my boyfriend isn’t faithful over there, sometimes when I call he’d speak to me in hushed tone and say he’s going to call me back and for the next one week I won’t hear from him but I know he loves me.


Since this beginning of this year I can’t hold the urge anymore, should I just cheat on him once? Will he know I did it? Maybe I should travel to another state and do it, this world is a small world I don’t want to do it with someone he might know in the future, what should I do?


P.S I am 28



Talk2Bella.


This is something you should talk with your man, who knows he might give you a pass. The possibility of him being faithful is 50/50 it’s either he is or isn’t and that you and I can’t know for sure.


Four years is a long time to wait for someone don’t you think? And you don’t know when or if he will be back, you need to look out for yourself not all these stories end in fairytales.


I wouldn’t advise you to cheat on someone who you still feel you’re in a relationship with, its better you take a walk than cheat.


Talk to him about these urges, ask him if there’s any hope he’s coming back soon and if not if he would like you to come over for a vacation, you would get your answers from these questions and know what decision you got to make.

http://www.talk2bella.com/2016/09/should-i-cheat-on-him-just-once.html

JeffreyJamez:


Baba said she looks like someone he has shagged,... Iya said she has shagged many men but doesn't remember shagging him.

Is that not funny?

it would seem funny if this wasn't tearing someone's relationship apart
show some sympathy na
everyone's got a past

smithsydny:
Mk I book space dey look

JeffreyJamez:
This shii is funny buahahahahahahaha....

how so?

j0nsn0w:
she should leave him

why?

I know I used to be wayward and always high but I can remember all the men I have slept with and this guy isn’t one of them.


Please how do I convince him I wasn’t the one, he keeps making snide remarks when my fiancé is around always talking about how I look like the girl he’s been down with.


I don’t wanna lose this guy, it took a lot of effort on my part for him to start trusting me because of my past, but it seems his friend wants to start rubbing it in his face, it’s causing a lot of tension at home and he’s asked me repeatedly if I have slept with him.


Truth is I might not be entirely sure, or I might be, this guy is making me doubt myself and I might just admit because of the pressure, but does it really matter, my fiancé knew I have slept with several men before all this, why does this particular one bother him?



Talk2Bella.



Everyone’s got a past dear and it’s a good thing your man knows about yours.


Now about that friend of his, your man needs to have a stern talk with him, he needs to protect you from people like that, all they want to do is hurt you and make you doubt yourself.


Tell your man you aren’t entirely sure if you slept with him or not and it was all in the past and doesn’t have to interfere with the present.


Remind him how much you have changed and how far both of you have come, he needs to always remind you that your past won’t be a problem between both of you or it might affect you future.


Whenever that friend of his come to the house and make those remarks again, be the strong woman you are and give him a piece of your mind, your man chose to be with you while knowing the severity of your past, who is his friend to come make mockery of that?


Sweetheart fear not, things will work out for the better all you need to do is believe in yourself and don’t let anyone bring your efforts to naught.

http://www.talk2bella.com/2016/09/my-fiances-friend-seems-to-think-weve.html