₦airaland Forum

nymphomaniac:
merry Xmas NLanders

on behalf of the others, thanks

feran14:
ookay.. this is too long to read.... besides this doesn't change anything

Dont be lazy, its not that too long to read. surely you must have read longer texts during your school days. If it was a romance or sexuality story i bet you'll be asking for more.

source: http://www.simpletoremember.com/vitals/Christmas_TheRealStory.htm
i pity you christians walahi talahi!

I. When was Jesus born?

A. Popular myth puts his birth on December 25th in the year 1 C.E.

B. The New Testament gives no date or year for Jesus’ birth. The earliest gospel – St. Mark’s, written about 65 CE – begins with the baptism of an adult Jesus. This suggests that the earliest Christians lacked interest in or knowledge of Jesus’ birthdate.

C. The year of Jesus birth was determined by Dionysius Exiguus, a Scythian monk, “abbot of a Roman monastery. His calculation went as follows:

a. In the Roman, pre-Christian era, years were counted from ab urbe condita (“the founding of the City” [Rome]). Thus 1 AUC signifies the year Rome was founded, 5 AUC signifies the 5th year of Rome’s reign, etc.

b. Dionysius received a tradition that the Roman emperor Augustus reigned 43 years, and was followed by the emperor Tiberius.

c. Luke 3:1,23 indicates that when Jesus turned 30 years old, it was the 15th year of Tiberius reign.

d. If Jesus was 30 years old in Tiberius’ reign, then he lived 15 years under Augustus (placing Jesus birth in Augustus’ 28th year of reign).

e. Augustus took power in 727 AUC. Therefore, Dionysius put Jesus birth in 754 AUC.

f. However, Luke 1:5 places Jesus’ birth in the days of Herod, and Herod died in 750 AUC – four years before the year in which Dionysius places Jesus birth.

D. Joseph A. Fitzmyer – Professor Emeritus of Biblical Studies at the Catholic University of America, member of the Pontifical Biblical Commission, and former president of the Catholic Biblical Association – writing in the Catholic Church’s official commentary on the New Testament[1], writes about the date of Jesus’ birth, “Though the year [of Jesus birth is not reckoned with certainty, the birth did not occur in AD 1. The Christian era, supposed to have its starting point in the year of Jesus birth, is based on a miscalculation introduced ca. 533 by Dionysius Exiguus.”

E. The DePascha Computus, an anonymous document believed to have been written in North Africa around 243 CE, placed Jesus birth on March 28. Clement, a bishop of Alexandria (d. ca. 215 CE), thought Jesus was born on November 18. Based on historical records, Fitzmyer guesses that Jesus birth occurred on September 11, 3 BCE.



II. How Did Christmas Come to Be Celebrated on December 25?

A. Roman pagans first introduced the holiday of Saturnalia, a week long period of lawlessness celebrated between December 17-25. During this period, Roman courts were closed, and Roman law dictated that no one could be punished for damaging property or injuring people during the weeklong celebration. The festival began when Roman authorities chose “an enemy of the Roman people” to represent the “Lord of Misrule.” Each Roman community selected a victim whom they forced to indulge in food and other physical pleasures throughout the week. At the festival’s conclusion, December 25th, Roman authorities believed they were destroying the forces of darkness by brutally murdering this innocent man or woman.

B. The ancient Greek writer poet and historian Lucian (in his dialogue entitled Saturnalia) describes the festival’s observance in his time. In addition to human sacrifice, he mentions these customs: widespread intoxication; going from house to house while singing naked; rape and other sexual license; and consuming human-shaped biscuits (still produced in some English and most German bakeries during the Christmas season).

C. In the 4th century CE, Christianity imported the Saturnalia festival hoping to take the pagan masses in with it. Christian leaders succeeded in converting to Christianity large numbers of pagans by promising them that they could continue to celebrate the Saturnalia as Christians.[2]

D. The problem was that there was nothing intrinsically Christian about Saturnalia. To remedy this, these Christian leaders named Saturnalia’s concluding day, December 25th, to be Jesus’ birthday.

E. Christians had little success, however, refining the practices of Saturnalia. As Stephen Nissenbaum, professor history at the University of Massachussetts, Amherst, writes, “In return for ensuring massive observance of the anniversary of the Savior’s birth by assigning it to this resonant date, the Church for its part tacitly agreed to allow the holiday to be celebrated more or less the way it had always been.” The earliest Christmas holidays were celebrated by drinking, sexual indulgence, singing naked in the streets (a precursor of modern caroling), etc.

F. The Reverend Increase Mather of Boston observed in 1687 that “the early Christians who first observed the Nativity on December 25 did not do so thinking that Christ was born in that Month, but because the Heathens’ Saturnalia was at that time kept in Rome, and they were willing to have those Pagan Holidays metamorphosed into Christian ones.”[3] Because of its known pagan origin, Christmas was banned by the Puritans and its observance was illegal in Massachusetts between 1659 and 1681.[4] However, Christmas was and still is celebrated by most Christians.

G. Some of the most depraved customs of the Saturnalia carnival were intentionally revived by the Catholic Church in 1466 when Pope Paul II, for the amusement of his Roman citizens, forced Jews to race naked through the streets of the city. An eyewitness account reports, “Before they were to run, the Jews were richly fed, so as to make the race more difficult for them and at the same time more amusing for spectators. They ran… amid Rome’s taunting shrieks and peals of laughter, while the Holy Father stood upon a richly ornamented balcony and laughed heartily.”[5]

H. As part of the Saturnalia carnival throughout the 18th and 19th centuries CE, rabbis of the ghetto in Rome were forced to wear clownish outfits and march through the city streets to the jeers of the crowd, pelted by a variety of missiles. When the Jewish community of Rome sent a petition in1836 to Pope Gregory XVI begging him to stop the annual Saturnalia abuse of the Jewish community, he responded, “It is not opportune to make any innovation.”[6] On December 25, 1881, Christian leaders whipped the Polish masses into Antisemitic frenzies that led to riots across the country. In Warsaw 12 Jews were brutally murdered, huge numbers maimed, and many Jewish women were raped. Two million rubles worth of property was destroyed.



III. The Origins of Christmas Customs

A. The Origin of Christmas Tree
Just as early Christians recruited Roman pagans by associating Christmas with the Saturnalia, so too worshippers of the Asheira cult and its offshoots were recruited by the Church sanctioning “Christmas Trees”.[7] Pagans had long worshipped trees in the forest, or brought them into their homes and decorated them, and this observance was adopted and painted with a Christian veneer by the Church.

B. The Origin of Mistletoe
Norse mythology recounts how the god Balder was killed using a mistletoe arrow by his rival god Hoder while fighting for the female Nanna. Druid rituals use mistletoe to poison their human sacrificial victim.[8] The Christian custom of “kissing under the mistletoe” is a later synthesis of the sexual license of Saturnalia with the Druidic sacrificial cult.[9]

C. The Origin of Christmas Presents
In pre-Christian Rome, the emperors compelled their most despised citizens to bring offerings and gifts during the Saturnalia (in December) and Kalends (in January). Later, this ritual expanded to include gift-giving among the general populace. The Catholic Church gave this custom a Christian flavor by re-rooting it in the supposed gift-giving of Saint Nicholas (see below).[10]

D. The Origin of Santa Claus

a. Nicholas was born in Parara, Turkey in 270 CE and later became Bishop of Myra. He died in 345 CE on December 6th. He was only named a saint in the 19th century.

b. Nicholas was among the most senior bishops who convened the Council of Nicaea in 325 CE and created the New Testament. The text they produced portrayed Jews as “the children of the devil”[11] who sentenced Jesus to death.

c. In 1087, a group of sailors who idolized Nicholas moved his bones from Turkey to a sanctuary in Bari, Italy. There Nicholas supplanted a female boon-giving deity called The Grandmother, or Pasqua Epiphania, who used to fill the children's stockings with her gifts. The Grandmother was ousted from her shrine at Bari, which became the center of the Nicholas cult. Members of this group gave each other gifts during a pageant they conducted annually on the anniversary of Nicholas’ death, December 6.

d. The Nicholas cult spread north until it was adopted by German and Celtic pagans. These groups worshipped a pantheon led by Woden –their chief god and the father of Thor, Balder, and Tiw. Woden had a long, white beard and rode a horse through the heavens one evening each Autumn. When Nicholas merged with Woden, he shed his Mediterranean appearance, grew a beard, mounted a flying horse, rescheduled his flight for December, and donned heavy winter clothing.

e. In a bid for pagan adherents in Northern Europe, the Catholic Church adopted the Nicholas cult and taught that he did (and they should) distribute gifts on December 25th instead of December 6th.

f. In 1809, the novelist Washington Irving (most famous his The Legend of Sleepy Hollow and Rip Van Winkle) wrote a satire of Dutch culture entitled Knickerbocker History. The satire refers several times to the white bearded, flying-horse riding Saint Nicholas using his Dutch name, Santa Claus.

g. Dr. Clement Moore, a professor at Union Seminary, read Knickerbocker History, and in 1822 he published a poem based on the character Santa Claus: “Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, in the hope that Saint Nicholas soon would be there…” Moore innovated by portraying a Santa with eight reindeer who descended through chimneys.

h. The Bavarian illustrator Thomas Nast almost completed the modern picture of Santa Claus. From 1862 through 1886, based on Moore’s poem, Nast drew more than 2,200 cartoon images of Santa for Harper’s Weekly. Before Nast, Saint Nicholas had been pictured as everything from a stern looking bishop to a gnome-like figure in a frock. Nast also gave Santa a home at the North Pole, his workshop filled with elves, and his list of the good and bad children of the world. All Santa was missing was his red outfit.

i. In 1931, the Coca Cola Corporation contracted the Swedish commercial artist Haddon Sundblom to create a coke-drinking Santa. Sundblom modeled his Santa on his friend Lou Prentice, chosen for his cheerful, chubby face. The corporation insisted that Santa’s fur-trimmed suit be bright, Coca Cola red. And Santa was born – a blend of Christian crusader, pagan god, and commercial idol.



IV. The Christmas Challenge

· Christmas has always been a holiday celebrated carelessly. For millennia, pagans, Christians, and even Jews have been swept away in the season’s festivities, and very few people ever pause to consider the celebration’s intrinsic meaning, history, or origins.

· Christmas celebrates the birth of the Christian god who came to rescue mankind from the “curse of the Torah.” It is a 24-hour declaration that Judaism is no longer valid.

· Christmas is a lie. There is no Christian church with a tradition that Jesus was really born on December 25th.

· December 25 is a day on which Jews have been shamed, tortured, and murdered.

· Many of the most popular Christmas customs – including Christmas trees, mistletoe, Christmas presents, and Santa Claus – are modern incarnations of the most depraved pagan rituals ever practiced on earth.



Many who are excitedly preparing for their Christmas celebrations would prefer not knowing about the holiday’s real significance. If they do know the history, they often object that their celebration has nothing to do with the holiday’s monstrous history and meaning. “We are just having fun.”

Imagine that between 1933-45, the Nazi regime celebrated Adolf Hitler’s birthday – April 20 – as a holiday. Imagine that they named the day, “Hitlerday,” and observed the day with feasting, drunkenness, gift-giving, and various pagan practices. Imagine that on that day, Jews were historically subject to perverse tortures and abuse, and that this continued for centuries.

Now, imagine that your great-great-great-grandchildren were about to celebrate Hitlerday. April 20th arrived. They had long forgotten about Auschwitz and Bergen Belsen. They had never heard of gas chambers or death marches. They had purchased champagne and caviar, and were about to begin the party, when someone reminded them of the day’s real history and their ancestors’ agony. Imagine that they initially objected, “We aren’t celebrating the Holocaust; we’re just having a little Hitlerday party.” If you could travel forward in time and meet them; if you could say a few words to them, what would you advise them to do on Hitlerday?

On December 25, 1941, Julius Streicher, one of the most vicious of Hitler’s assistants, celebrated Christmas by penning the following editorial in his rabidly Antisemitic newspaper, Der Stuermer:

If one really wants to put an end to the continued prospering of this curse from heaven that is the Jewish blood, there is only one way to do it: to eradicate this people, this Satan’s son, root and branch.

It was an appropriate thought for the day. This Christmas, how will we celebrate?

AUTHOR: LAWRENCE KELEMEN
6K

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lies! some of us who have access to people in the villa have it on authority that the old crook is usually wasted on wine and ogogoro by 10pm. Thats the bastard's hobby and during this festive season, the country is on autopilot. Walahi talahi!

victorazy:
Walahi may Arrah sorry Allah spoil ur family. Buhari will remain INEC customer till I come meet him GEJ till Buhari draw Jesus tatoo on chest and shout Haliluyah oo!

karya ne walahi talahi! Allah will curse you b4 that will happen. Dan shegiya kawai

victorazy:
Later they will say northerners no dey support BH. Thunder fire Bahari. Make I see person wey go dey insult GEJ here. Come here come see wetin dey hapen,

u are very s.t.u.p.i.d walahi talahi, and may Allah curse you and jonagoat till eternity. Jona is a bastard walahi talahi! Kai!

A robbish talk, a bery bery robbish talk walahi talahi!

dunkem21:
Nkpi awusa. Ezi ofia. Anu mpama.

Akika taakwa gi na ndu.

Okpo.

phuckin pig!

dunkem21:
Onuku odeku.

Nne muru gi gba aka nwa.

Ama nna gi chi kwa.


Pay a translator to download your baggage.

ka ji wani dan banza dan talikin wawa, may Allah's curse be upon you and may google help you with the translation henceforth. Bastard son of a b.I.t.c. h!

dunkem21:
I serve a living God. The almighty and the owner of the whole universe.

He is my shield, my strength, buckler and hiding place.

No curseweapon fashioned against me shall prosper ..

..And any tongue that rises against me is CONDEMNED!

nansense!

dunkem21:
Isi odichakwa gi mma?

Ngwere aghuri.

kai ne shegiya walahi talahi, dan banza dan iska kawai.
Translation: you are a son of a bastard walahi talahi, son of a gun, a robbish walaho talahi. Allah's curse is upon you!

dunkem21:
Allah dey curse person

I wan learn.

his curse is already upon u walahi talahi. Kai!

Sai mun chi kutumar durun uwar jonatan walahi talahi kai!

A wannan chrisimati ina sujada ga yan uwana masu bin yesu kristi almastihu. Ama Allah ya tsine wa duk wanda suka bi jonatan da orisatijafor walahi talahi! Translation: I want to take time out to wish my christian brethren a merry christmas, but may Allah curse the jonathanians and oristijafor and their followers, walahi talahi! Allah is not pleased with them

Ai jona baban BARAWO ne walahi, shegen ya san sata, walahi talahi kwa!

Look at this crook talking

Karya ne walahi talahi!

holatin:
yes now
A President almost 300 gurls got kidnapped during his regime.
A President dat can't protect the lives of citizen.
A President Corruption sore high like a flag in his regime.

A President that don't Ve a pint of compassion for his citizen (kukere after nyanya bomb blast)
A President that can't call igg to order
A President that can't control his wife unchallant attitude
A President that money grow wings like eagle in his regime
A President that soil Nigeria name in mud.


oya tell me how he come close to best.


Buhari for President jare.

I think jerry gana must be high on weed harvested on burial ground or he drank gin miss with some litres of unrefined petrol



J= Just
O= On
N= Negative
A= Assignments
T= To
H= Harm
A=All
N= Nigerians
B= Bring
U= Us
H= Hope
A= And
R= Remove
I= Incompetence
Change Jonathan come 14th February,
2015 !!!

ka yi maganan gaskiya walahi talahi, jonaSATAN dan shegiya ne walahi talahi, he mos be remobe prom ze office next year walahi talahi! Kai!

Karya ne walahi talahi! Besides this violates ze electorial law zat futs caps on ze amount of money a candidate can spend and how much each individual can donate to a campaign. Walahi talahi! Sha sha sha kawai

Ikengawo:
Ekwensu gbuo anofia di ka ngi. Aturu

https://360nobs.cdn.ng/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/apc.jpg

may Allah curse you shege

Ikengawo:
https://i.huffpost.com/gadgets/slideshows/20116/slide_20116_265440_large.jpg?1303148998506

www.nairaland.com/attachments/725321_buhari_nigeria_election_riot_jpgdc124c1456e12d2a2c965681e1826c9f

https://i.huffpost.com/gadgets/slideshows/20116/slide_20116_265428_large.jpg?1303148900787

https://www.globalpost.com/sites/default/files/imagecache/gp3_slideshow_large/nigeria-violence-elections-2011-4-19.jpg

https://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/2011/04/19/world/19nigeria_cnd/19nigeria_cnd-articleLarge.jpg

https://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/images/52231000/jpg/_52231707_52230956.jpg

me ka yi kenan dan shegiya? Dan talikin ubanka ne ka fito? Watch out for part two, shegu kawai!

major466:
Kai A.B.O. K.I ya kana magana haka? Hey friend why are you talking like this?
Baka San Jona yana aiki so sai ba? Don't you know GEJ is working hard?

kai kai kai you are a bery useless walahi talahi, ip I for see you on d 'part2' ob dis thread, I shall deal with you mercilessly walahi talahi shege

He was just learning the tricks of the trade and after doing pretty well, he's a billionaire today

Look out for part2 of 'Ama Jona nan shege ne fa' coming to you live on your nairaland politics section. 'Tit' walahi talahi sai na chi kutumar durin uwariki walahi talahi

Due to the peculiar nature of our politics and society, it is impossible for any serious minded 'national' political party to field either two southerners or two northerners on the same ticket. Ditto for a muslim-muslim or christian-christian ticket. Its a pipe dream

nduchucks:
Son of a biiatch!!!! ka yi hakuri Mallam, a watanni biyu zamu zabe.

ndu na fa gaya maka: 'face your work o'

ZKOSOSO:
@op
Going by the time u posted the above, its glaring that somebody in ur bedroom is not performing. So I understand ur tranfer of aggression. No vex. It happens sometime. Try harder.
Idan ka issa, ka nemin takaran shugaban kasa!
Kazamin bususu!! Wawa!

may Allah reign curses on you shege dan sha sha sha kawai. Jonathan is a bastard and will always be, idiat!

Ayesman:
Da ke da goodluck kunci kutumar ubanku, ubanku ya kwana dudu yana luka ma uwaki bura, kundun durin uwarki, kina ji ko?

ai baka san chewa wannan 'tit' shegiyar karwan PDP ba? Sha sha sha che walahi. Kutumar dan buro ubanta

tit:
dan duri!
GO AND JOIN SHEKAU!
Nigerian Army wil behead you and make an appointment for you with Allahu!
duri uwarka

the curses of allah will be on you and your generation forever and ever yar shegiya kawai!

tit:
boko haram bestiality dey give some people liver.

may Allah curse you shegiya yar baza kawai. Witch!

I need a cigarette