biolabee: ^^ calm down ma,... e pass this matter?

If he did not cheat in wedlock, why did she cheat post "I DO" moreover in pregnancy or post partum - not cool

I never cheated on my husband in pregnancy...pls don't misquote me...

The reason why I bothered 2 reply 2 my husbands post was becos I was made out 2 be the devil.., a woman dont just step out the must be somethyn that may av promted her 2 do so...

My hubby isn't a bad man contrary 2 what u all miss read in my post...but he had his own fault most worse dan mine..

He feels he is always right, and cannever be wrong.

I av made peace with myself and my God...I av attempted 2 make peace with him but he feels he can't make peace with me...

I am not happy I cheated, a lot of circumstances led 2 it...most understand where I am coming from most don't.

Majority just came here 2 insult. I pray God not allow anyone experience all dis.

I never lied about anythyn I said in my ealier post...I just wanted him 2 kknow he also is not a saint...he can't deny

It is very unfortunate dis got 2 dis level...all my life sin. I never tot I'd find myself in a place like dis.

Not my intention 2 wash my dirty linen outside...8months after discovery my hubby decided 2 post dis on Nairaland...he has slept with me over 20times since he knew now ihe says I repulse him..we av been happy! But it seems he wants me 2 kill myself before he knows I am sorry 4 what happened.

I av tried. U all say it is okay 2 chat rawly with young ladies cos its just a chat he hasn't slept with dem dat makes it okay. It is okay 4 him 2 av kept on sleeping with his ex days before our wihte wedding months after aour court wedding cos we were not married yet?.

Since he.has read on dis forum all the responses and support he is getting he believes he is right and the victim.

I leave all 2 God. And I leave him 2 his next wife...

I was shocked and thrown into fresh pain and sadness when I stumbbled upon what my husband wrote about me on this forum. I was shocked den completely angry. What manner of man would put up such about his wife? He has sooo painted a picture of a cheating wife...no body cared 2 ask him what could he av done 2 push his wife outside...it seems on dis forum people thrive on insults.

The insults were just too much and I av decided 2 speak. Let u all be the judge since u all can judge.

I met my husband October 24th 1997 den I was just 17years fresh out of secondary school. I was very Naïve. I fell in luv with him. That luv was pure.. But we broke up after 5years because my husband cheated on me. My husband luvs women more dan himself. But dis he sees nothing wrong with...he claims he is a man so that makes it okay.

We seperated, and reconneced 2004, den he proposed 2 me but I refused 2 get married den becos I was still in school. I did still luv him but I knew I wouldn't av been able 2 cope with the struggles of school and marriage.

We seperated again and in 2008 he met me again after I finished proposed again and I agreed dis time around and the ball was set...

Meanwhile my so called husband 2 be was still in 3different relationships..the girl he was taking home 2 marry, his yoruba girlfriend and his igbo girl friend. I didn't know all these until few weeks 2 the wedding...I was shocked but my hubby said it was normal...

On his way home 2 introduce his wife 2 be 2 his parents, he stopped and took me instead..and dumped the other girl...I found out later and asked him wjhy, he said he loved me more. I wondered was it that easy 2 switch off dis luv feelings and switch it back on?

Few days 2 our white wedding months after our court wedding, my husband was still sleeping with his yoruba and igbo girlfriends...this I got 2 find out after the wedding from a text in his ☎ and the girl herself even his own sibblings..he actually came 2 marry me from her bed.....my husband said that was normal because he had not put a ring on my finger, so that can't be classified as cheating.

I was shocked...I started noticing stuffs about my husband I didn't see 17years ago when we were dating....aside from the fact that he loved women, he is also lazy....would rada sit back without struggling while things are brought 2 him on a platter.

I av been hustling 2 make ends meet 2 feed my baby and make sure we don't die of hunger..he sat here conviniently saying he meets all his duties as a husband...in all alspect in that area he has failed as far as I am concerned..

When going 2 work he picks up women in the name of given dem lifts, dey exchnage pins and become chat mates...morning afternoon night updating each others on their lives and movements....he said there is nothing between dem...my husband registers in dating sites and puts up statistics of the kind of woman he luvs women responded 2 dis, even including our area where we live as his area of concentration....and he said he did that just 2 understand women better..

All dese he did while I was pregnant 4 my baby..there was a time I saw a crazy chat on his ☎ where he was telling a young girl how beautiful and attractive she is and how he couldn't resist walking up 2 her when he saw her from accross the street. I was shocked. He was supposed 2 buy the foam we used 2 set up my baby room and he ended up toasting the sellers daughter when I found out he said he was trying 2 make her feel better about herself...imagine !!!

Another time still while I was pregnant dis same man didn't bathe 4 4days he was busy chatting with a woman on yahoomail..describing in details 2 2 make luv 2 a pices woman the spots 2 touch 2 set her offs lots of raw personal chats...how did I see dis? He fell asleep and I saw it...I woke hoim up asked him and he said. She is a ldy he gave a ride and she complained 2 him she can't seem 2 get pregnant 4 her hubby...pls my husband is an engineer not a therapist or a councellor...

Where I work I had two male friends, both I was very close too. I spoke 2 one constantly and sought his advice but the thing is he always supported my hubby said I should stop acting on substantial evidence...I got very close 2 him, I don't av female friends cos they can be very female if u understand what I mean.

This my Oga and I became close he assisted me in many areas...yes I developed feelings 4 him. But dis was very under control I work with this man almost 24hrs of the day...and he was always dere....he assisted me in areas that I needed my hubby 2 but he was too busy making friends and torturing me emotionally and physically ...he said he has never laid his fingers on me that is a lie he has belted me 2wice and used a shoe 2 beatme up too...simply cos I said he should cut off from dese women.

I slept with my colleague 2wice yes....I shouldn't av done dat I av no justification. I was depressed and needed someone 2 talk 2....we both realised what we were doing and put a stop 2 it...that period if he can be truthful my husband can testify 2 how that affected me that period.I was dying in silence cos I wanted 2 tell him. I was scared....he failed 2 mention he found out 5months after all had ended...I slept with dis man march ending..and it ended, 5months after I put 2 bed..I was wrong and I av been suffering in silence and in the open....my husband failed 2 mention I had 2 travel 4 1whole week without my baby, 2 cover an assignment so as 2get money 2 the the needs of the home cos we were starving. I came back after 7days and my baby rejected my breast milk cos she hadn't sucked 4 long. Now he said I was aving an affair and sleeping with another mab without condoms...

Conviniently condeming me as an irresponsible mother...8months on I am still begging 4 forgiveness. I don't sleep at night I try 2 make ammends but he has refused 2 forgive me, when I forgave and av stuck by him even with all his excesses. I read all he wrote and all ur responses and I felt bad...I cheated yes that authomatically made me a bad wife....he saw mails that pointed 2 nothing and revealed nothing...but I told him I slept with him cos I couldn't keep it anylonger. Now he makes it sound as if it is an ongoing thing.

I av decided 2 grant him a divorce, cos I cannot stay on in dis kind of marriage where a man thinks he is god and cannever be wrong.

8days after I was married his girlfriend kept callings mocking and insulting me, he did nothing about it....stayed becaus I loved him...but now he judges me, when he is the one who brought in his excess bargage into our marriage from the begining 2 lay a bad foundation fo our marriage and he blames me...

I am no saint, but I av been the best wife as I can be and te best mother any woman can hope 2 be....I av left that organization just 2 prove 2 dis man I luv him and av nothing 2 do with dis man but he has still refused 2 forgive..

Accoring 2 him when a man cheats, it is the norm and tradition of the society becos that's how its supposed 2 be. It is acceptable so that makes it okay. But when a woman does it is a taboo and it becomes unforgivable...

He complains I am fat, he loves slim women...so he is out hunting 4 his stepford wife....a lady a corper calls him regularly even late at night as late as 2am or 1opm and he says she is his friend...an It student that worked in his office den went 2 service he has been keeping constant touch with different women, not minding my feelings when I ask he says I should deal with it...

Tell me how much can a woman take..even if I am a robbot. U all judge and insult me..calling me names that are unthinkable...u can think all u want I am not a bad wife neither am I a bad mother. He told me from the onset this marriage was a mistake now I am ready toright dat mistake I cannot continue 2 torture myself and suffer in silent. Recently I was diagnosed with high BP..as a result of too much worry and stress. I av asked him does he wnt me 2 kill myself before he knows I am sorry?

Men don't do unto others what u cannot take he must realize dat.